A/N:
Clexa space AU. Clarke's planet and Lexa's planet were at war. Clarke joined the army to defend her planet. What would happen when she met Lexa, a leader of the rebellion army on her planet? What was exactly behind the war? Rated M for a reason.
In this story, Clexa relationship is going to be a very, very slow burn. Lexa will not appear until after a few chapters, so if you are interested in this story, please bear with me. Since this is AU, its plot has nothing to do with the plot of the show, and the characters grew up differently. Though, I may borrow a lot of interesting stuff from the show, like Trigedasleng.
A brief introduction of this AU's background:
In the far future, Earth has entered another ice age. Humans have foreseen that and moved to other planets which they called "Neoearths". The planets where Clarke and Lexa are from are two twin planets which are really similar to Earth. Their ancestors have arrived there a few hundreds of years prior to this story after a very long (about 15,000 years) cryonics trip from Earth. The two planets are at war right now.
This story belongs to a space AU series of mine called "Stardust". There is another fic in this series that I'm working on, which is a Valkubus centric fic called "Stardust: The Valkyries"(where Tamsin is a bounty hunter, and Bo is an astrobiology researcher). At some point, these two stories are going to cross over for a bit (the crossover chapter, or chapters, won't be too lengthy). You do not have to read the other story, or to know anything about Valkubus to read this one. When they show up, I will give enough introduction about them. If you have no idea who Tamsin or Bo is, you can treat them as an OC f/f pairing.
Aaaand a serious warning here.
*************************WARNING **************************
If you think what happened to Lexa in 3x07 deeply upsets you, like it would trigger a panic attack or something similar, please skip the first part of this chapter, scroll down and start reading from "a few months earlier". The first part is just a flashforward of what would happen in the future in this story. I decided to include this particular scene in this story, because I want to "fix" what the show has done, but I can't fix it in the canon universe so I will fix it in this AU.
**********************END OF WARNING ***********************
Disclaimer: I do not own the show, and I do not profit from it. Had I own it, s3 wouldn't have been a train wreck.
Chapter 1
Bang! Bang! Bang!
That loud sound ringed in Clarke's ear like knells.
Then, there was a moment of silence, a moment of nothing, as if the world had ceased to exist, as if everything had faded away, disappeared, vanished.
Slowly the ringing buzz came to her in her ears, and it got louder and louder. She squeezed her eyes shut while wondering why her vision had a crimson color.
It took her a while to realize that it was the color of blood. There was fresh blood in her eyes and on her face.
She raised her hand to her face and it was then that she noticed the handgun in her hand. It was her gun, and the barrel was still warm.
She swallowed hard and looked down, finally registering the scene in front of her: a pool of blood under her foot as well as two people who were lying there side by side, facing down.
She took a step forward and got down on one knee. She reached for the dark hair one first, but withdrew her hands the moment she touched her armored shoulder.
She flipped the other person over instead. From the gunshot wound on his forehead and his chest, she knew it wasn't necessary for her to check his pulse anymore.
Flipping the other person over, her heart stopped at the wound on her lower abdomen.
"Lexa…" she called, her lips starting to quiver at the gushing blood.
The brunette opened her lips and inhaled. "Clarke..." she forced that name through the bubbling blood in her throat. She coughed, before she lifted her right arm. She wanted to touch Clarke's face again, but after a weak spasm, her arm lolled.
"Lexa, stay with me," Clarke pleaded as she pressed hard on the gunshot wound. Blood ran out, through her fingers, drenching Lexa's clothes. The scene gave her an actual pain in her chest. She had to force herself to breathe, to inhale the air that had suddenly become too thick. Too thick because of the smell of blood.
Lexa gave her a smile. Tears flickered in her dark eyes. "Ai gonplei ste odon (My fight is over)," she told Clarke softly. There was nothing but peace on her face.
"No, no, it's not. Don't say that! Don't you say that! You are gonna be okay. I'm gonna save you. I can do this," Clarke bit her words out as she applied more pressure on her wound. Why wouldn't the bleeding stop? Why?
She looked around in panic, and was about to yell for help. Before she did it, though, the door to the small chamber they were in flung open.
People rushed in. Their weapons clattered heavy boots stomped on the ground as if they were stomping on her heart.
"Heda, we hear gunshots-" One of the the people spoke, and stopped abruptly when she saw Lexa lying in a pool of blood in front of Clarke. In shock, she glanced at the dead guy, before she raised to look at Clarke, who was covered in blood with a gun in her hand.
Clarke looked back at those who had just entered the room. There were her people, and Lexa's people. They were all looking at her, at her gun, and at Lexa.
After a brief silence, one of Lexa's men pointed at her furiously and yelled, "murderer! She killed Heda and the ambassador!"
Clarke's eyes shot wide open. "No..."she stuttered, shaking her head at the accusation, but was too shocked to defend herself.
The crowd started to argue. They shoved each other around, pointed weapons at others, and yelled loudly.
"Seize her!" Someone shouted while pointing at Clarke, and she was immediately dragged away. They twisted her arms behind her back and shoved her to the ground.
"No, no! Lexa!" Clarke called as she turned to look at the brunette. She struggled frantically, wanting to go back to her side, to hold her hand, to beg her to stay with her, to beg her to live.
They wouldn't allow her. They held her head down forcefully and shoved a piece of cloth into her mouth.
Her hand were tied behind her back while everyone was yelling at her furiously. Through the angry crowd she saw Lexa. The brunette tried to get up and stop her people, but she couldn't get a single word out.
A rush of fear seized Clarke's heart. Not the fear for her own fate. Not the fear for the fate of the others. Not of the fear for the fate of her planet, or Lexa's planet, or any planet, or the entire universe. She was just terrified for she was going to lose the person she held truly dear to her heart. She was terrified for she was going to witness Lexa's death and she couldn't do anything about it.
She heard the crowd yelling "kill her! Blood shall have blood!" She heard her own people arguing with them. She heard more shots fired. She heard people falling, crying, and shouting.
She reached for Lexa's hand, but she could not get any closer. She saw those beautiful, beautiful dark eyes slowly shut, and she closed her own in despair.
Stay with me. She begged in her heart while muffled whimpers of fear let her mouth in short bursts. Stay with me, Lexa, please. Stay, stay, live, live, please, live.
- A Few Months Ago -
Tossing her backpack into the corner of the living room, Clarke closed the door behind her. She swiftly tapped her index finger on the control panel display on the back of the door to lock it, before she pulled off her boots and set them aside.
Throwing herself into the couch, she waited for the cushions to change into the most comfortable shape for her body. Then, she rolled to lie on her stomach and popped a snack container open.
She had a few bites, before she slurred, "can I watch some news?"
The central system answered her request with its usual voice, soft, gentle, with small pauses between words. "What type of news are you interested in, Clarke?"
"The usual?" Clarke shrugged while tilting her head back. She tossed a piece of snack into her mouth, and added, "what's going on with the war against the 02 savages?"
"The peace talk this morning was disrupted, because-"
"-an assassination attempt was made to the chancellor. Yeah, I know, I read it when I was at school this morning. Any updates on that?"
"The chancellor is stable. He is in the North Ridge Hospital, along with two other severely injured Council members. The visitation hours are-"
"Stop, I don't care about the visitation hours. What about the peace talk?"
"No further updates have been made on the peace talk. Residents of planet FF100oc-02 vowed to defend their planet at any cost. The newest poll showed an increase on the percentage of population who are absolutely against any peace talks."
"Yeah, sure, who would they want a peace talk when they are attacking us?" Clarke snorted. "Any updates on the war?"
"Two attacks happened today here in capital with a casualty of 231 people. Over twenty threats has been made in the past week, including one bomb threat in-"
"-my college, yeah, I know," Clarke said. "Who tried to kill the chancellor by the way?"
"An extremist group from planet FF100oc-02 claimed responsibility for the assassination attempt. However this news source is not confirmed."
Clarke snorted. "Like there's anyone who doesn't know that it was those savages already…anything else?"
"Our army retook two mines from the 02, however large group of soldiers were captured, injured and killed. The army of FF100oc-02 pushed our defense back by several miles. Calculating their casualties…."
Clarke signed. "I don't care about their casualties. Do you have anything that might cheer me up a little?"
"Sure, Clarke. Are you interested in a video where it shows a kitty purring?"
"Pass. Watched it already," Clarke rolled her eyes.
The system paused for a second or two, before it started with a rather cheerful tone. "Breaking news. Diana Sydney just announced that she's running for the next chancellor."
"Really? She's running? Oh my God finally!" Clarke opened her eyes wide with a surprised smile on her face.
"Are you interested in watching it live, Clarke?"
"Yeah, yeah, sure, of course," Clarke answered as she straightened her body. "Hurry, play."
The surface of the coffee table in front of her was lit up. Hologram video started to display above it.
"...today I've made my decision to run for chancellor," a middle aged blonde woman said firmly to a small crowd of reporters and supporters, "Because our planet is under siege, and something has to be done. We have to show our strength. We have to fight back."
"Damn right something has to be done," Clarke murmured.
"Citizens of FF100oc-03, I urge you to join me, to condemn the violence and to pray for our chancellor Jaha and wounded Council members, but prays are not enough. You have to join me, to take responsibility, to show our strength, to defend our planet!"
After a brief pause and a confident smile, she added while raising her right hand, "to unity, prosperity and a bright future!"
Cheers exploded among the audience in the news, and Clarke cheered along with them excitedly. After rewatching the video for a couple of times, she rolled back and forth on the couch like a happy child when she chanted "Sydney! Sydney" with the audience.
She paused the news when she heard the door open. "Hey, mom," she greeted the woman who had just walked in.
Her mother, Abby, gave her an exhausted nod before putting her purse down. She put both of her hands on the kitchen counter and lowered her head. After stretching her sore muscles, she took a deep breath.
"Bad day?" Clarke asked, concerned.
"I'm fine," Abby replied. "It's just...I had just finished an 8-hour surgery on the chancellor."
"Yeah I saw it in the news this morning. He's okay, right? The news said that he's stable. And the other two members of the Council?"
"He's stable, and I shouldn't be discussing the others with you," Abby said. She glanced at Clarke's bag, the boots she had taken off, and the empty snack bag. "Why are you home so early? I thought you had evening class?"
"School closed early. Bomb threat," Clarke told her.
"Bomb threat? Why haven't I heard of this?"
"Because you were doing the surgery, you probably had your earpiece put somewhere else and they don't have live news broadcasting system in there?" Clarke reminded her.
"Tell me about this bomb threat," Abby sat down beside her, concerned.
"Oh, it was nothing. I got an update when I was on the way home. They cleared the buildings and found nothing. Probably just some dumb kid who was trying to stop an exam or something."
Abby nodded with relief and went into the kitchen to get herself some water. "How about I cook some dinner for both of us tonight then?"
Clarke gave her a smile, though she didn't look thrilled at all. After nervously licking her lips and fumbling with the tassels attached to the side of the couch cushions, she said, "mom...I ummm…I have something that I-"
"Wait..." Abby raised her finger at Clarke when a buzz from her earpiece reminded her of an urgent incoming call. She listened to it, before she sighed. "Never mind, you'll have to fix some dinner on your own. The Council just called me in for an emergency meeting."
"Okay," Clarke nodded as she watched her mother putting her coat back on. "Hey, mom, can I talk to you?"
"Right now?" Abby narrowed her eyes at her daughter. "Can this wait?"
"Ummm...no, I mean, yeah, sure."
Abby paused, before she asked, "what is it, Clarke?"
Clarke bit her bottom lip hard, suddenly unable to hold her mother's gaze. She cleared her throat for a few times, before she said, "I ummm...I submitted the request for a leave from school today."
"You did...what?!"
"I'm not quitting school, mom," Clarke immediately argued. "I'm just taking a break from it."
"And why the hell would you want to do that, hmm?"
Clarke took a deep breath and held it. "I am joining the army."
Abby opened her mouth in silence. She was too shocked to say anything for a while. "You are not going to do that," she hissed afterwards.
"It's time for me, for all of us, to take responsibility and defend our planet, mom. People are dying!"
"Exactly, people are dying! Take responsibility? Defend our planet? Those are not your words, Clarke. Those are Diana Sydney's words."
"Her words are my words. She is speaking for all of us," Clarke argued. "The 02s have been attacking us for years. They have been destroying our mines. They have been killing our people, flaying them like savages and they-"
"Clarke, no, you are not joining the army. This is not negotiable," Abby interrupted her.
"Almost every kid in my college is going, mom. Hell, a lot of professors are going too! Have you seen the line outside the enlisting offices? Raven enlisted in yesterday, and-"
"This is not a competition, Clarke. I am not gonna let you go just because your best friend is going," Abby raised her voice. "The answer is no, period."
"Why? Because you think that I'm too weak for it? That I'm not good enough to become a soldier? Or because you just don't care what is happening right now?"
"It's a war, Clarke, a war!" Abby persuaded. "People die. You might get killed too."
"Well, someone has to do something before all of us get killed by the 02s," Clarke said firmly.
Abby shook her head in defeat. "Believe me, they are not going to kill all of us. Their losses are just as much as ours, if not more."
"Of course you are gonna say that, mom. You are one of the pro-02 members in the Council," Clarke pointed that out.
"Clarke, I'm not pro anyone. I just think things should be settled through rational ways instead of wars."
"Yeah, I sure hope peace talks would work but did they work at all?" Clarke raised her voice. "I am going, mom. I've made my decision."
"You think you are obligated to do this, because they want you to think this way! You didn't make that decision, Clarke. People like Sydney put that decision in your mouth. The mass media is talking about the war every day, every hour and every minute-"
"Because that's what we have right now, mom! We are at war with the 02s! They are murdering our people, and we need to stop them. Something has to be done!" Clarke argued. After a short pause, she added, "it's not like I need your permission anyway. I'm not a minor anymore, mom."
Abby threw her hands into the air in frustration. "Clarke, you may think you know everything about the war, but no, you don't know anything about it, really."
"Yeah, of course, because I'm nothing but a stupid child."
"You are a stupid child. You are not thinking straight," Abby growled. Then she combed her fingers through her hair while another buzz from her earpiece reminded her that she was already late for the meeting.
"Look, I have to go now. The Council needs me. Let's talk about this when I get home later, okay?"
"Fine, whatever," Clarke grunted.
Abby reached her right hand out at Clarke with her palm facing up. "Give me your ID card."
"What?" Clarke exclaimed. "No, mom. I'm not giving you my ID card."
"Give me your ID card," Abby repeated firmly.
"No," Clarke refused again.
"Okay, here's the thing. Either you give it to me, or I'll make a call to deactivate your ID card."
Clarke rolled her eyes, and pulled out a charcoal gray card from her bag. She tossed it on the floor angrily and rolled her eyes again when Abby picked it up.
"You call the office the first thing tomorrow, and cancel that request for that leave, you hear me?"
Clarke mumbled something vague and turned away.
"I'm serious, Clarke," Abby warned.
"I know, mom. You got my card, okay? It's not like they are gonna let me join the army without my ID card or something. Happy now?"
Abby sighed and shook her head, before she walked to the door with her purse.
"If dad was here, I bet he'd support me," Clarke complained in a low voice.
She knew she crossed the line the second she mentioned her dead father, and the look on her mother's face pained her, but Clarke just looked away in silence pretending that she didn't care at all.
After Abby closed the door, Clarke jumped out from the couch. She pulled out a second charcoal gray card from the secret pocket in her backpack and kissed it.
"Can't join the army without my ID card, can I?" She murmured and kissed the card again. "Thanks, Raven, for making me a duplicate one."
Knowing that she wouldn't have much time, she quickly turned off everything and went into her bedroom.
After dragging a packed bag out from her closet and laying it beside her bed, she sat down and looked at everything in her bedroom.
Her eyes finally fell on one of the drawers of her desk. She walked to it and pulled it open. Inside the drawer there was a few journals, some jewelries from her childhood, a couple of old photos and an old watch.
She picked up the watch and rubbed her thumb against the glass. "Hey, dad, you'd understand, right?" She whispered at the watch that her dad had given her.
She knew expecting a response from her dead father was just stupid, but she really wanted him to appear in front of her and tell her to go because she knew her mother would never tell her so.
Taking a deep breath, she looked at her room for one last time before she threw the bag on.
Exiting into the living room, she ordered, "leave a message to Abby."
"Sure, Clarke, I'd be happy to. What would you like to say to Abby?" The synthesized voice answered her.
"Mom, I know you are gonna be mad at me, but..."
She paused, suddenly not sure what to say after that "but". She wanted to convince her mother that this wasn't a choice in rush. She wanted to tell her that she really wanted to do this. She wanted to tell her that she really wanted her support, but eventually, she just said, "I'm leaving, mom."
As the transport ship entered the atmosphere of FF100oc-02 and started to descend, Clarke held her breath as she looked at the landscape down below through the window to her left.
She had never visited FF100oc-02 before, and it left her speechless. She was amazed by the smoky hills where the mines were at. She was amazed by the winding rivers, the green farmlands, the lush forests and the steep mountains. What amazed her the most, was how similar it was to her home planet, FF100oc-03.
She had finally understood why those two planets were often called "twin earths". The only difference she had noticed so far, was that 02 was much less populated and developed.
She wondered which one would better resemble the origin of humans. Was her planet closer to the planet where human race had come from, the planet that had been called "Earth", or was 02 closer to it?
Earth. Her heart fluttered at that name. It was something that seemed so close yet so far away. When did they say that the ancestors of the 02s and 03s came here? Ten thousand years ago? Or was it twenty thousand years ago?
She tried to recall that number from her textbook, but all she could remember was that a long time ago, humans on Earth had sent out a ship in search of possible new homes. The ship carried a group of explorers in cryonics pods and travelled across many galaxies, until it reached FF100oc-02 and 03. They had finally found their new home, and they stayed, until-
A soft pinch on her face pulled her out from her train of thoughts. Turning to her right, she saw Raven's raised eyebrows.
"Still worried about your mom being mad at you?" Raven teased while pulling on the strap that had held her shoulder back.
"Nope, not really, cuz she's one planet away. She can't kill me right now even if she wants to," Clarke said. She looked down at her new uniform, which seemed to be a bit larger than her size, before she said, "I wasn't expecting that they'd ship us out so soon."
"Well we are at war. What do you expect? They need us on the battlefield fast," Raven shrugged. She held Clarke's hand in hers and squeezed it. "Don't worry. We are gonna be okay, cuz we are gonna stick together, right?"
Clarke nodded. She was about to say something, but a sudden jitter from the ship interrupted her.
People gasped, and then they all laughed at how easily scared they could be. Clarke chuckled quietly when she heard someone behind her making fun of his friend of screaming loudly during the jitter.
"Well, maybe it's time for us to mingle, you know, if we crash, at least someone would know our names, right?" Raven joked, and Clarke rolled her eyes.
"We have our name tags sewed to our damn uniform, Raven," Clarke drawled. "I'm sure they'd know who we are."
Raven didn't listen to her, though. She threw her chin at the three guys who were sitting opposite to them, and greeted, "hey. I'm Raven, and this is Clarke."
One of the guys, the older one, nodded at her politely and simply said, "Bellamy."
The other two looked at each other, as if they were having a hard time figuring out who should go first. Both tried a few times, but immediately stopped when realizing the other person was about to talk. Eventually, they said their names at the same time. "Monty (Jasper)."
Clarke bit her chuckles back and nodded at them. "I don't think I've seen any of you guys in the boot camp. Where are you guys from?"
Both Jasper and Monty immediately turned to Bellamy. Bellamy glanced at Clarke, before he turned away and simply replied, "small town recruits. We received our trainings somewhere else. "
"Really?" Raven frowned. "I thought everyone on this ship are from the same boot camp."
"Well, you are wrong," Bellamy told her. "We are from a different one."
Clarke and Raven exchanged a frown. Before either had said anything, they all felt another jitter accompanied by a loud, clashing sound.
Everyone on board quieted down while looking at each other. Most of them confused, a few scared.
"What was that?" Clarke murmured.
Raven shook her head. She was about to tell Clarke that it didn't sound good, but a deafening siren came. It drowned all the scared gasps and nervous murmurs.
If there had been anyone who didn't start panicking over the siren or the loud clashing sound, they sure did when all the lights were turned off, leaving only the emergency lights on. And when air masks started to drop down from the ceiling, terrified screams and cries exploded inside the ship.
Clarke reached for her air mask, but a sudden, heavy tilt from the ship shifted everything. She knew if she hadn't been wearing seat belts she'd have been thrown out of her chair.
The air pressure change inside the ship caused pain in her ears. She waved her arms trying to grab her mask, but that damn thing just kept slipping away from her fingers.
Another tilt from the ship almost made everything upside down. In the frightened screams, she had finally grabbed the mask. She put it on immediately, and inhaled hard.
Turning to Raven, she was relieved to see that Raven had the mask on already. "It's going to be okay!" She yelled at her best friend as she held her hand and squeezed it.
She saw Raven's eyes shot wide open. White fog covered the inside of Raven's mask like she was saying something, but she couldn't hear a word Raven said. She did recognize the look on her face, though. It was the look of fear. Something behind her scared Raven.
Clarke turned back, and immediately ducked her head just in time to avoid being hit by a large chest. It was then that she realized that a lot of personal belonging and supplies were flung out from the cabins.
The ship started to tumble, and the siren went on. Paled by fear, Clarke covered her mask with her left hand and squeezed Raven's hand with her right. For a moment she felt that it was hard for her to get air in or out through her throat.
This is not happening. She thought while biting back her tears. This is so not happening!
Her heart was pounding too hard, and her eardrums were about to burst. She trembled in fear while forcing herself to keep her eyes open because she had to know what was going on.
The last thing she remembered was part of the ship suddenly breaking away from the main body. The airflow tore ship parts off from the inside, including seats with people strapped in, and tossed them out into the air. The three guys sitting opposite to her had their fingers digging into the side of the armrests. Their faces looked as white as sheet.
She struggled to check on Raven, but something hit the back of her head, and she blacked out.