A/N: This story is in the same format as "How Far?"--total song fics. Of course, because of the site I've removed the lyrics, but the chapter name tells you what the name of the song was. Ya'll enjoy--if you want the full fic with lyrics included just e-mail me and I'll be glad to send them to you. Ya'll enjoy! Until next time--ya'll are the best--PCGirl.

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Disclaimer: All characters are property of ABC/Disney--I'm just borrowing and returning them in their original mint condition. ;)

John walked out of the bathroom and saw her sitting there on the couch—quietly lost in thought as she held his mother's engagement ring between her fingers—staring into it as if it would tell her a huge secret, "You're supposed to wear it," he joked as he walked closer and she looked up at him and he could see the traces of tear stains on her face.

"You never meant to give this to me, John. I knew it when I said yes earlier—heck, I said yes before you even asked," said Natalie, her voice shaking somewhere between sobs and laughter.

"Natalie—," he said as he sat down on the couch next to her and stared at the ring for a moment himself—and realized he was also waiting for it to tell him the same secret that Natalie had been waiting for—how did they get here and how did they get back to what they had. "That eighteen wheeler really screwed us up, didn't it?"

"We were screwed up before the wreck John—not half as screwed up as we are now, but we were. Getting engaged though—it's not the answer," she said as she handed the ring back to him and looked at him a moment before speaking.

"When you were gone that ring was what grounded me—knowing you loved me enough to want to spend the rest of your life with me."

"I still do."

"Then why do we keep hurting each other? Why can't we talk like we used to without it ending up as a yelling match? I miss that."

"I miss it too. How do we fix it?"

"I don't know either—maybe in time we'll know, but right now—we need to get our own lives straight before we can get us as a couple straight," she said as she stood up. "I'm—I'm not happy with who I've become lately John. I look in the mirror and don't see myself—not the spunky girl from AC, the one who isn't afraid to speak her mind, and could take care of herself without a second thought. I want to be her again—I'm good at being her."

"I like her too," said John with a half smile. "It's not all you though either—I want to be a better person for you. I know I'm not easy to live with."

"Really? I never noticed," she teased.

"Yeah—little known fact," he joked and suddenly realized the conversation they were having and got quiet first before the next words came out quietly, "I want you to be happy."

"I always have been with you. Hopefully when I come back we can be again."

"Where are you going?"

Natalie smiled at him and for a moment she wanted to change her plans and stay right here with him, "I'm going to go a couple weeks with Kevin and Kelly—get to know Zane some too. From there, I'm not sure where, but I know I'll end up back here—or I hope I will."

John was silent as he stood up and pulled her into a hug and kissed her forehead, trying to keep her from seeing the tears. "I'm going to miss you."

"Me too—hopefully it won't take me too long to find her," she said as she pulled out of the hug and kissed him lightly on the cheek. "Goodbye, John."

"Goodbye, Natalie," he said as he watched her gather her coat and purse and leave the room without looking back.