Hello, people this is for the 2011 M&MWP challenge! So…read it. Yeah.
This was never supposed to happen.
Percy always had a bit of an obsession with neatness and order and plans. His was simple: date Penelope, break up with Penelope, date Alicia, break up with Alicia, find true love, get married, have a nuclear family, retire with four grandchildren, die after seeing first great-grandchild.
He actually started out nicely—he dated Penelope. He broke up with Penelope. He dated Alicia. He broke up with Alicia. But then, two weeks after the said event, Alicia comes back, eyeliner running down her cheeks, a nervous wreck.
"Oh shit," she cried into his chest. "Percy, I'm so scared."
And all he really could do was hold her and tell her it would be alright, even though his heart sank into his stomach as he thought, Oh God I'm only eighteen and I can't do this and we aren't ready and Audrey's going to kill me and Mum and Dad will kill me and oh God what will the Minister think?
So he broke up with Audrey and bought an apartment in Muggle London and listened to mix tapes while Alicia sat on the couch, staring at the television while it played reruns of soap operas, eating mint chocolate chip ice cream and vomiting and s-w-e-l-l-i-n-g very softly as Percy watched and started to think, My God I think I love her and maybe this won't be so bad.
And it wasn't.