Disclaimer: nothing is mine, save the storyline that i haven't fully figured out
PRELUDE
Integra slid her spectacles down her nose and laid them on the ever-growing mountain of papers. She rubbed a tired hand firmly on her forehead, trying to iron out the premature creases and wrinkles. A tight frown had inhabited her face and it took an effort to relax the muscles at the corners of her mouth. She would have liked nothing more than to have dozed off after a cup of strong Indian tea. As Integra scanned her desk, found her last cigar. She stared at it intently, attempting to ward off the luring of it. 'Oh screw it. I'm going to smoke it.'
Slowly exhaling the calming fumes of the cigar, Integra noticed a speck of bold red against the more subdued browns and greens of the grounds. Very much against her will, Integra pulled herself from her chair. Pressing her face against the cool glass of the balcony door, she breathed deeply and stepped out into the wintry night. Just as she had expected, Alucard was stretched out on the dew-covered grass, lids closed, arms folded under his head, and legs crossed at the ankles. His wide brimmed hat and orange tinted glasses lay atop his neatly folded coat. He looked almost peaceful.
How deceiving looks can be... Integra knew that under that nonchalant facade were a hundred raging thoughts of the last autumn. Usually, Alucard would vent out his frustrated emotions through violence. Now, he was just... lying under the stars. Perhaps Seras had tamed the monster in Alucard...
It had been quite a while since his beloved's demise. But still, he had a somber and depressed air about him. He was still unable to talk audibly and the blaze that was normally in his crimson orbs had dimmed dramatically. His comrades had unsuccessfully tried to revert him to his former self. No one dared to anger him; they were almost positive he would retaliate, for they knew that under that dismal being, there was still much steel. Still, Alucard was not dealing with the loss as strongly as he thought he would.
Alucard felt his master's eyes on him, and he assumed a vertical position to send her a look that could kill. Integra's brows knitted together as she glimpsed a hint of scorn behind Alucard's eyes. 'Hell hath no fury against Alucard's wrath...' She couldn't tear her gaze from Alucard's suddenly aged face; he had never scowled for so long. She almost missed that maniacal, insane smirk. just as Integra finished the thought, the corner of Alucard's lips twitched and tilted upwards. Integra didn't notice the imperceptible change on his face.
Integra's nose was suddenly chilled. She looked up to see white flakes falling swiftly from the nothingness, the first snow of the season. Strangely enough, Alucard didn't flee from the numbing ashes. 'What? Alucard hates snow.' Apparently, it didn't make a difference to him anymore. For lack of a better explanation, he was merged with the cold of winter now. Integra forced herself to stay, the white fluff accumulating around her ankles. Only when the iciness set into her bones did she whisper, "Come inside, Alucard."
Whether or not he obeyed was entirely up to Alucard. As for Integra, she wasn't going to freeze herself numb. Latching the door, Integra turned to take a seat next to the fireplace. Instead of her empty office, she found it was occupied by Alucard. He glowered at the incandescent embers and spitting sparks, the crackling flames dancing across the dead wood. He had propped himself up by leaning on Integra's armchair. Dismissing the slight intrusion, she shrugged off her discomfort and flopped down, sitting in much the same manner as he had outside. As soon as she did, Alucard let his head rest on Integra's shoulder. She flinched at the contact, protesting, "Alucard, remember when I yelled at you about taking up my personal space? I don't think you want me to do it again." He made no motion to move away, causing Integra to heave a sigh. The moment of silence between them stretched on awkwardly until the Ice Queen parted her lips and said the only thing she could think of.
"You loved her."
Alucard fidgeted a bit with his sleeve before clearing his throat and confirming her statement. "More than you will ever know."
Integra did not expect him to acknowledge the feeble attempt at conversation with more than a simple nod. They reached a stand still again. She had given him her condolences, but it wasn't enough to make the pain subside. Integra was not emotional, but even she knew that she wasn't being nearly sensitive enough to him. 'Hell must have frozen over. Here I am, feeling guilty about not being empathetic to my servant.' Even so, Alucard would have remained tight lipped; he was not going to open up to his imprisoner.
"You should get some sleep, Master."
"I will not have you tell me-" She never finished her sentence because Alucard had shut her mind down and she was soundly asleep. Alucard lay her down in bed, pulling up the covers.
To himself, Alucard thought, 'I'd share with you, could I only speak, how much this hurts me. You don't care that it haunts me.'
ok, prelude finished, just give me a while to work on the next chapter. this is like the epilogue of the epilogue of the other story. just wait a bit. oh yeah, i credit alucard's thought to this time imperfect by afi. don't blame me, i was listening to it while i was writing and it fit perfectly...