Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter and Co. I own nothing.
Shadow Of The Prince.
Harry Potter's Emerald green eyes faded away until only cold darkness remained. He felt nothing, thought nothing, everything just slipped away like Quicksilver down a drain. Only one thing remained of him. His longing. Longing to see the one face that had haunted him for nearly seventeen years. Unlike the rest of him, his desire for her doesn't fade. It only increases. His need is so great her lost voice stirs in his fading mind.
"Severus," it whispers to him. "Severus, hear me," it pleads.
"Lily," he answers. He knows not if he spoke the name or merely thought it.
"Severus, come to me," the ghostly voice commands. He has no choice but to obey.
His vanishing mind started to solidify. Still hazy and unsure of anything, Severus feels his bare feet touch soft, cool wet grass. He opens his eye to see nothing but a heavy morning fog. The mist was moving fast across the ground, but he felt no wind. Something in the distance could been seen through the heavy fog. A towering monolith of some kind. It brought back some long forgotten feelings. The fog thins and he is able to recognize the distant object for what it is, the huge chimney that dominated his childhood neighborhood. The sound of creaking rusted metal made him turn around. A slightly lopsided marry-go-round squeaks as it turns with the wind. He is in the old playground. He breathed out a sigh of relief. Severus never knew what awaited him in the after life. He had always feared the worst. Lord knows he dissevered the worst. But this was more than he could have hoped for. The one place he had found true happiness.
"Severus," the voice whispers again. He turns again to face the swings. Three of the four swings swung freely from the large A-frame, their chains clanking lightly in the soft breeze. The fourth swing is occupied by a small figure. A chestnut haired girl with sparkling green eyes, she wore the same flowery covered tee shirt and faded red shorts he had first seen her in all those many years ago. Severus looks down at himself. His hands were small and thin, without the many burn scars he has acuminated over the years as a Potions Master. He wore a shabby Pee-coat over his smock and torn jeans. This brought a rare smile to his face. It so pleases him to here, before most of the bad thing in his life had happened. This was the in between time. The time just after his abusive father had left and before the trouble at Hogwarts had begun. This was the time of Lily and him. A time when he new they would be together forever.
He moves quickly towards her, praying she doesn't disappear before he gets there.
"Sit," she says, gesturing to the swing next to her. He is reluctant to put his full weight in the swing. He still fears the earth will open up beneath him and he will fall into a fiery pit. Her smile belays all his fears.
The warmth of her smile is short lived. His overwhelming guilt quickly resurfaces. "I have fail you, Lily," he says turning away, unable to face her. "It was I who told the Dark Lord about the prophecy. I hoped to spare you at the expense of your husband and newborn son." Tear burst form his eyes as he turns to faces her again. "I betrayed you, Lily. Your blood is on my hands forever."
"There is no blame, Severus," she says softly putting a hand on his. Her touch is warm and as real as he has every felt. "Even in that moment of selfishness your only thoughts were of my safety. You knew my son was fated to face Voldemort. The Dark Lord's knowledge of prophecy would not have changed that."
"What I did made you and your husband targets sooner instead of later. I was jealous of Potter and his son. I wanted you for myself. I wanted you to raise our son, not that egotistical, arrogant broom hopper that thought he was Merlin's gift to the world." Severus felt ashamed that his jealously still had teeth even after all these years. "There was nothing noble about what I did. My greed cost you and Potter your lives."
"Severus I'm going to ask you a question. Promise me you will be completely honest with me?" she asks.
"I promise. I have no more need for lies."
"That Halloween night at Godric's Hollow, would you have given your life to save me?"
"Of course," he answers without hesitation.
"Than night, would you have given your life to save, Harry?"
He pauses for just a second, thinking of what Harry had meant to her. "Yes."
"That night, would you have given your life to save James?"
"I…," he starts, but then stops. He had promised her the truth, but didn't know it until that moment. The truth was raw and painful. Lily had never been happier than when she was Potter's wife. Not even when she was his best friend for their first five years of Hogwarts. A fact that tore at him like a sharp hook in his side. "Yes," he finally answers. "For your happiness, I would have given anything."
"And you have continued to scarifies everything for me." It was more of a statement than a question.
"But I still failed," he says with regret. "My only hope of redemption was to save your son's life. I've try so hard to protect him. I've let other die so that he may live. Even when Dumbledore revealed that he must die if the Dark Lord is to be destroyed, I did not give up. I had a plan that might have save the boy."
"When Harry would meet Voldemort, you planned to sacrifices yourself in his stead?"
"Yes. I would step in front of the Dark Lord's killing curse. I would do it for love, the love for you that has never died. That love is stronger now than ever, Lily. It would be the same magic you use to protect him as a babe. I was hoping the Dark Lord would destroy not only himself, but also that piece of his soul that remains in Harry Potter. I know it was a slim chance, but I had no other option."
Severus stared down at his bare feet unable to keep looking at her. "But I failed him. And in doing so I failed you,…again. He will face the Dark Lord tonight alone. All I could do in the end is show him what you meant to me and what fate has unjustly decided for him." Severus felt a prickling in his neck. The spot where Nagini had inflected her mortal bite started to itch. He rubbed his hand along the spot feeling no wound there.
"Severus you failed no one," Lily said with a smile. "For years you have protected my son until he was strong enough to face his own destiny. That is something I was not strong enough to do. In doing so you have become the great man I always knew you would become."
The irritation in his neck was growing steadily worst. He started to scratch at the phantom wound.
"Greatness is not something I identify with," Severus tells her. "My attempts to amend for my failures may be colossal, but they are failures just the same."
"Greatness is in the eye of the beholder, Severus. My eyes see much greatness within you," Lily states as if it were a fact.
"Forgive me, Lily, but you have not always been the best judge of character. You befriend me, married that twit Potter and agreed to make Pettigrew your secret-keeper,"
"I regret only the latter," she assures him. "You have not failed Harry, Severus. When he faces Voldemort, he will be victorious. You and Dumbledore have made that possible. Thousands of live will be save. That is the definition of greatness."
"That greatness is Dumbledore's alone. I only followed where he lead," Severus told her as he continued to rub his neck.
"Where he lead was full of mortal danger, Severus. There seemed no limit to your courage. Dumbledore took full advantage of that," she said with a touch of resentment in her voice.
"It was not courage, Lily. I did not fear death because I knew you await me here. I don't know how I knew, I just knew," he explains. "After your death, I had nothing left to live for. I only wanted to redeem myself before we could meet again. I placed all my hopes of redemption on saving Potter from his fate. When he dies tonight, I will be lost," Severus tells her placing his head in his hands.
Looking down at his feet he notice he had boots on. He was now wearing a slightly worn Slytherin school robe. Lily was shorter than him now. She remained nine years old while he had aged at least four years.
"You underestimate, Harry, Severus. His fate is not sealed yet. He may die tonight. If that happen I will rejoice, because at last my family will have been reunited. If he survives I will continue to wait for him, just as I will continue to wait for you, Severus," she tells him with a smile.
The pain in his neck is now a full-blown throb. It feels like he has suffered an acid burn under the skin.
"There is no need to wait for me, Lily. Unless purgatory is my finally destination. If so I will find away to climb out of that pit and reach you again," he promises her. She looks even smaller to him. Looking down again he see he now wears his trademark black robes. Severus recognized these robe as the first new pare he ever bought on his nineteenth birthday.
"I'm sorry, Severus. Fate has decided that your life's journey has not yet ended. You will have to go back," she tells him with a little regret in her voice. Severus couldn't help but let out a laugh.
"I don't think fate has much to said about it, Lily. I'm quite dead, I can assure you. Nagini bite was as fatal as there could be. A bite to the neck, piercing the carotid artery, injecting massive amounts of poison: my heart probably stopped before I had a chance to bleed to death."
"You're a Potion's Master, Severus," she tells him.
Severus almost doesn't hear her. He has changed again, now a full adult in his teaching robes. "I don't see how that is relevant, Lily. I had no antidotes on my person. I lost consciousness before any could be administer to me. I'm not even sure if there is an antidote for Nagini's bite. Even if there were my blood lost would become fatal in minutes."
"You are the Half Blood Prince, Severus. The boy that knew more about Potions in his four year and than old Slughorn had learned in a lifetime. You helped me, a muggleborns who hated potions to pass her O.W.L's with flying colors. You spent a year as the D.A.D.A Professor and another as Headmaster, but you still brewed every chance you could get."
"Of course. Potions are the purest form of magic. I don't see how any of this will have saved me," Severus tells her.
"Every great potion maker knows to protect himself from poisonous fumes. You still take your weekly dose of bezoar powder and Mandrake Draught,' Lily said with a sharp smile. Severus remembers that smile. She always uses it when she knows something he doesn't.
"The bezoar powder and Mandrake Draught are not powerful enough to stop the poison. It will only delay the inevitable for a few minutes."
The sky over the old playground grew dark. Lightning flashed. For a brief second Severus thought he saw wooden rafters overhead instead of dark clouds.
"The bezoar and Mandrake is keeping the poison from stopping your heart. The poison has nearly paralyzed you, slowing down your heart and breathing, which in turn is keeping you from bleeding to death," she explains.
"It matters not. Even if Pomfrey was standing over me now I'm still domed. Noting will stop the poison from eventually killing me. I can feel it still burning my neck even now," he assures her.
"Are you sure that is what your feeling?" she asks smugly.
"What else could it be?" he asks.
"It seem that Harry isn't the only student of your you have underestimated. What you feel in your neck Severus is someone administering a cure.
"Impossible," he firmly states. "I'm dead. There is no going back!" The lightning flashes again. Severus sees the interior of the Shrieking Shack clearly for just a moment. "No." Severus stands. Every time the lightning flashes more of the Shrieking Shack is visible to him.
"No I will not leave you, Lily. I have waited too long," he tells her.
"There is no use, Severus. The magic that pulls you back is too strong to overcome. This is the ways it's meant to be," she assures him.
"To hell with what is meant to be. To hell with fate," he shouts at the darkening sky.
Severus feels her warm hand take his. She stands next to him with sad eyes. "Severus, you enriched my life so much. But we were never meant to travel the same path. You are my first love, but not my greatest. You know this to be true."
"I do," he whispers. "You are my first, greatest and only love, Lily." Severus begins to feel pain in his feet and hands as if they had been frozen then suddenly plunged into a bucket of hot water.
"I still love James, Severus. Death did not change that." Her works hurt more that the pain in his limbs. "You must promise me, Severus. Promise me you will try to fine your true love and some happiness. Not everyone gets a second chance, Severus. Don't waste yours on me," she pleas.
'A second chance?' thinks to himself. Severus kneels down in front of her. He places his right hand on her soft warm cheek and says, "I will go back, Lily. I will go back and save your son. That is why fate has given me a second chance."
"A mother's love and concern for her only son is the reason you return, Severus. But it is not for me or Harry." What she says puzzles him. Of course she and Harry are the reason he is returning.
Lily's cheek becomes cold under his hand. She begins to fade.
"No, stay with me, Lily," he pleads.
"I cannot stay, Severus. Harry calls me. I must go. You must as well, Severus."
The playground disappears with her. "I love you, Lily Evens," he says as the last of her vanishes.
"It's Lily Potter, Severus," her voice whispers to him on the wind. "Follow your heart, Severus Snape."
………………………..
His eyes spring open as his chest convulse with a fit of coughs.
"WE DID IT," a familiar voice yells.
"I can't believe that worked," another familiar voice says with surprise.
Severus' vision is blurry; he can just make out two figures hovering over him. He tries in vain to lift himself off the floor.
"Easy, Professor. You lost a lot of blood," A voice tells him.
"Draco?" he asks with a cracked voice as the blond boy's face comes into focus.
"Yes, Professor Snape," Draco answers. "I here with Goyle."
Severus tries again to get up. Two pairs of hands help him into a sitting position.
"Where I'm I?"
"Your in the Shrieking Shack, Professor," Goyle answers.
"We saw Potter, Weasley and the mudblood girl come out of a passage way under the Whomping Willow. We followed it trying to get away from the battle and found you here where Potter and his friend attacked you," Draco tells him.
"Attacked, me?" he asks.
"We didn't see them do it," Goyle answers. "They must have caught you by surprise. Right Professor?"
Severus notices something in Draco's right hand. A vial. He takes it away from Draco. It's empty. He smells it and asks, "What was in this?"
"Phoenix tears," Draco answers.
……………………
Next chapter coming soon.
I have a question for my readers. Should Severus find a new Original Character love? Or should I use a canon character?