Nikki sat in the wheel house of the boat she had hired. It was a pretty basic boat but it did the job she wanted it to do. They were heading out towards red reef. It was a annual event she always did. Playing with the chains of the dog tags that hung round her neck. There were 2 sets on separate chains. Her own and those of Leading Seaman Joshua Holiday. Every year since his death on his birthday and valentines day she would take the trip to where his ashes had been scattered to pay her respects. She looked out at the vast ocean ahead of them. It hardly seemed like 10 years had passed and so much had changed since then. Even though the pain had eased it would sometimes well up and take over.

In 10 years Nikki had found her self promoted to first lieutenant and she was also married to Pete Tomaszewski. The old Buffer of HMAS Hammersley and one of Josh's best friends. At the other end of the boat she could just make out Pete teaching their 2 children to fish

A Little Girl ran in to the wheel house, crying.

"Katie whats the matter" Nikki cooed

"mamma Eliwot put the squid in my hair and I don't like it" she cried

"oh dear come hear"

Nikki pulled her 5 year old daughter on to her lap holding her till she stopped crying. undoing the long plats and running her fingers through her daughters long brown hair, Nikki ran her fingers back through scraping it back in to a pony tail

"better" she smiled looking round at her daughters face. kissing her cheek

"come on lets go and see what Daddy and Eliot have caught" she smiled wiping away the tears with her sleeve.

Walking to the front of the boat she could see her son was looking at the fish he had just caught.

"Elliot Joshua Caetano come hear" she called indicating for him to come and stand in front of her.

The little boy walked over. His blond curly hair blowing in the wind his ever cheeky smile plastered over his face. At 10 years old he thought he knew it all and wasn't shy of showing it

"why are you picking on your little sister"

"I didn't" he protested

"I don't want to hear it Elliot. Just say sorry please"

"muuum" he wailed but stopped when Nikki gave him the look. "sorry Katie" he gave his sister a awkward hug

"elliwot" she giggled

Nikki smiled before returning to the wheel house. Checking the charts and the GPS she could see they were almost upon the co-ordinates where ET 's ashes were scattered. Stopping the engine she picked up the wreath of red and white roses she had brought.

Walking out on to the deck she looked over to where her children were happily playing. She smiled they had brought her so much happiness and a reason to go on. Tears began to well up in her eyes. The last image she had of him burnt on to the back of her mind. Turning his lifeless body over and pulling the hood of the wetsuit off before realising it was him. She wished she could see the happy him but all that was tainted by that last image of him.

She threw the wreath over the side of the boat and watched it bob away slowly with the waves.

"happy valentines day Josh" she whispered in to the wind hoping the breeze would carry it to the heavens.

Pete walked over and wrapped his arm around her shoulders pulling her in to a hug.

"you okay Nav" he looked at her

"yeah" she forced her self to smile "happy valentines day Pete"

"Happy valentines Day Nav" he kissed her on the cheek.

Nikki looked over to where her children were playing happily. Elliot was the spiting image of his father, in looks and the way he acted. sometimes it was uncanny with the things he would say. Katie was chasing him around trying to cling on to him like a little monkey. she was a little monkey and she had her father wrapped around her little finger.

Nikki smiled she would have never thought she was able to find true happiness after ET had died. but her children made her happy

happy valentines day. hope you enjoy.