Blair couldn't believe it. She couldn't believe that she had done it again, the thing she promised herself over and over she wouldn't do. Blair sat over the toilet, wiping her mouth and the tears that had stubbornly fallen, and cleaned the toilet so no remains would be found. She cursed aloud, looked at herself in the mirror, and went downstairs to head off to school, hoping that there would be something out of the ordinary, something distracting today, something to help her forget she had just thrown up her food again. She felt ashamed.
****
"Serena! Erik! It's time for school," Lily shouted. Her children came down the stairs, Serena applying her lip gloss while struggling with her backpack. Erik chuckled.
"I'm going to be gone with Rufus for a few days; we have something we need to check for in Boston. "
"Boston? Again?" Erik asked.
"We don't believe the agent who told us that the boy was dead. There have been a few things to indicate he isn't-" Lily said.
Serena raised her eyebrow, and opened her mouth to speak, before Lily put her hand to Serena's mouth.
"I don't need to hear anything from you, my dear," she said, giving Serena and Erik kisses on the cheek. "Call Cece if you have a problem."
"Bye, Mom," Erik said as they headed out the door.
******
"Jenny! Are you out of the bathroom yet? I swear, you've been in there for hours," Dan said, looking at his watch in an annoyed fashion.
"I'm coming, I'm coming," Jenny answered, opening the door. " I figure now I have to make sure I look even nicer than I already am; maybe I can find somebody. Erik has Jonathan, you have Serena, it'd be nice not to be alone all the time."
Dan ruffled his little sister's hair. "You'll find someone, soon, I promise. Now let me in the bathroom so we can at least attempt to get to school on time, okay? Dad said to say bye. He's going to Boston again with Lily, something about there being a possibility the half sibling is actually alive."
Jenny squealed. "Wouldn't that be amazing?"
Dan looked at her, incredulously. "Then where would Serena and I stand? It'd be complicated, not that amazing at all."
"I'm sure you'll change your mind eventually," Jenny said, allowing Dan entry into the bathroom, "But hurry up, we're going to be late."
******
Constance Billard looked the same as it did when Serena first started years ago. She marveled and rejoiced at the fact that soon they would all be graduating.
"I'll see you after school, okay? We can walk home together," Serena said to Erik. "I'll be 'Mom' for the week."
Erik grinned. "Sounds like a plan. I'll see you at 3."
Serena waved, as she met up with Dan in the hallway. They shared a kiss before they were interrupted by Blair, who looked upset.
"Serena, can I talk to you?" she asked, looking at Dan, who nodded.
"I'll meet you at the cafeteria at lunch okay?" He said to Serena.
"What's up, B?" Serena asked as they headed for their classroom.
"I did something bad," Blair admitted.
"Oh no," Serena said, looking anxious. "Not that again?"
"She's just been pressuring me so much lately," Blair said. "I can never please her, no matter how hard I try. It's getting to the breaking point again."
They stood in front of their English classroom, and continued to talk.
"B, sweetie, you can't do that to yourself. We've talked about your mother, remember? You have to do things for yourself and not for her. You have to make your own standards. Eleanor Waldorf will always be setting high standards, no matter who with. You're beautiful, no matter who tells you otherwise, okay?"
Blair smiled, a small smile at that. "Thanks, S. Sometimes I don't know what I'd do without you. "
Their moment was interrupted by the sound of gunshots which seemed to be coming from the far side of the hall. Terrified, Blair and Serena shared a glance, as Blair took Serena's hand in hers.
"Run," Serena whispered, as they followed the herd of people scrambling to get out of the front door in time. Serena couldn't think, couldn't breathe, but just concentrated on holding onto Blair's hand as they moved closer to the door. They ran out of the school and onto a quiet street, where everyone was gathering. She noticed Blair's tears as well as her own, and clutched her best friend tightly, trying to calm both of them down. They released a few minutes later.
"Are you okay?" Serena asked the question, which was relative. Blair shrugged, hugging her arms to her chest. The autumn air was chilly, and her light jacket wasn't helping matters.
"I need to find Erik, and Dan, and Jenny," Serena said. Blair nodded, as Serena dragged her through the crowd. Blair flinched as she heard more gunshots and screams coming from the school, as people trapped in their classrooms couldn't get out.
"Dan! Thank God!" Serena breathed as she spotted Dan's backpack. Dan turned around and held Serena tightly, reaching out and pulling Blair in as well. For once, Blair didn't complain- and wondered if was because of Cyrus or the shock of it all in which she didn't mind being held.
"Where's Erik and Jenny?" Serena asked Dan. "I've looked everywhere and can't find them." Her voice trembled, as she couldn't bring herself to think of the possibility.
Dan bit his lip. "I think they're still in there."
Serena went into his arms again, and heard him sniffle as she held him tighter. Blair held onto her hand. What would happen now?