Early autumn leaves cascade around them on a sunny Wednesday morning. Jane and Maura stand stretching on the sidewalk. They don't talk, the silence comfortable -only the rhythmic in and out of their slowing breaths breaks the silence. They had been running together more ever since Dennis and Dominic and Lydia and the warehouse and just everything. Maura asked Jane to run with her and Jane said yes without complaining, her need to be near the doctor over-ruling her distaste of the monotony of running.
Jane peers over at Maura sitting down on the sidewalk continuing with some deep stretches. Jane smiles, Maura always had more patience for the stretching than she does. Jane knows something is up with her friend. Maura has been quieter than usual, more subdued. Flashes of the good doctor are there which gives Jane hope but something is off. Jane hopes just time together, building new memories will help them move on from the horrid last few months they have had. Truthfully it feels to Jane like there is a change in the air; she doesn't think it will be bad but only different. Her eyes flutter shut as she leans into the stretch before returning her gaze to Maura and her wild ponytail and flushed cheeks.
"Jane, I can feel you scrutinizing me. What is it?" Maura asks quietly leaning to grab her calf.
Jane abruptly looks away, "What? No, I'm not."
Maura smiles wide enough that her dimples pop out. "Please, Jane, talk to me." Maura says as she stands, brushing leaves off her backside.
Jane smirks at her best friend, considers her next words, "Do you wanna tell me what's up? It seems like you've been trying to get up the nerve to tell me something the last couple days. Something you think might upset me is my guess."
Maura narrows her eyes at Jane while turning to sit on the front steps of her house. "How do you do that?"
"Do what?" Jane plops right next to her on the steps their thighs touching warmly.
"Read me so well? So consistently?" Maura says a bit exasperated.
Jane chuckles. "We're best friends. Still, even after everything. And I know you, you let me know you. And besides you know me just as well." She finishes more seriously.
Maura nudges Jane with her shoulder affectionately.
"And seriously? "
Maura nods.
"I care about you so, so much and we've had a crappy bunch of months and you haven't truly bounced all the way back," Jane pauses, "Understandably, and I want to help you in whatever way I can." Jane finishes and gently reaches over to take hold of Maura's right hand in both of hers. She gives it a squeeze.
Maura looks sideways at Jane, her chin propped in her free hand balanced on her spandex clad knee. She squeezes back and turns to look out into the street, tracking stray leaves as they fall to the ground.
"This is why you're my best friend. At work you do this almost oafish, detective, one of the guys swagger thing but then with me, you're this thoughtful, sensitive best friend who is so patient and kind. You're an amazing paradox, actually." Maura finishes smiling to herself and then looking at Jane.
Jane sputters, "Oafish? I'm…thanks, I guess? I am very glad we're best friends too?"
Maura smiles, pats Jane's hand still clasped with hers with her free hand. "It was a compliment."
"Of course." Jane murmurs with an indulgent smile.
"I have a plan of what I think I need to do to get "all the way back" as you say but I am afraid it might upset you. And these last few months have been taxing for you as well."
"Humph. Just say it. I love you. We are LLBFF's right?"
Maura takes a deep breath in before placing her other hand onto Jane's. "OK then –before you and your family and our friends I always dealt with obstacles in a more solitary manner. I went away where I could work out things separate from the distractions of work and people. I would run and meditate and do yoga and things would work out and everything would be OK. But now I have you and you give me support and understanding I haven't had before. And I have Angela and others who are here to help me cope but I think the rest of the work I still need to do on my own." Maura trails off finally looking Jane in the eye.
Jane continues to rub her thumbs over Maura's knuckles in soothing circles. She remains quiet waiting for Maura to finish.
"See? Look you're so patient with me. With others, not so much."
Jane runs fingers through a tangled pony tail, "Ah, well, it comes and goes." She says laughing. "Keep going."
Maura clears her throat looking at her running shoes, the greens and greys, the fluorescent yellow, ridiculous shoe laces that Jane had put in without asking her. Smiling to herself, "So…I'm going to go away for a few days to finish the "work" we've been doing and get all the way back. My brain does so much processing; I need some space for it to do it."
Jane looks at Maura for a few quiet moments, tucking a stray hair behind her ear, taking in flecked hazel eyes with adorable crinkles and a furrow between perfectly sculpted eyebrows.
She takes a deep breath in, "OK."
"OK?"
"OK. I trust you to know yourself best. I will hate every moment you are away but I trust you." She squeezes cold hands in hers one more time before rising from the front steps. "And now, let's get changed, you owe me breakfast." Jane says offering a hand up, smiling reassuringly at the doctor.
Maura nods and they head inside.