Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters , settings, etc involving Voltron: Defender of the Universe. These stories are for entertainment purposes only and are to be viewed as parodies.
The Adventures of Elevator Lance:
The Return of Elevator Lance
"Where's the message coming from?" Keith asked.
"It's coming from Earth," Coran informed in.
"Maybe its Lance," Pidge piped in.
"Yeah. Then we can ask him what he's been doing," Hunk said.
Allura moved next to Keith. "Patch the message through immediately, Coran."
Coran pushed some buttons and the main view screen flickered to life. On the huge screen is an image of Lance sitting next to a police officer and wearing handcuffs.
"Hey guys, could one of you wire me some bail money?"
Allura, Hunk and Pidge exchanged looks and then they all looked at Keith.
Keith looked at his three teammates and shrugged. "Call it a hunch."
6 Months Later...
Lance was happy to be home on Arus. After serving five months of community service on Earth he was looking forward to getting back in Red Lion. He got up a little extra early and took his time getting ready. After getting a nice shower, Lance got dressed, had a big breakfast and headed off to work.
He stood in the hallway, waiting on the elevator to arrive. As he waited, a pair of beautiful, blonde twins walked by and gave him a seductive wink as they each put a piece of chewing gum into their mouths.
"It's great to be back," he said to himself. Lance turned his head back to the elevator just as the chime rang.
The doors to the elevator opened and standing in the elevator was a black robed figure, his head covered with red and black tattoos. Stubbed horns protruded from the top of his head.
"I've been waiting for you." Darth Maul pulled out his lightsaber and extended the two blades.
Lance reached into his coat and pulled out a lightsaber. He pressed the activation button, igniting the blue blade.
Lance rushed into the elevator striking at Darth Maul. Blades clashed and light flashed as the two combatants, standing at opposite sides of the elevator, slashed, cut and parried each other's blades.
The elevator stopped on the 20th floor and as the doors opened Lance and Maul stopped and looked towards the hallway. Standing there frozen in front of the door was a nun and small group of children.
"Going down?" asked Lance.
"We'll catch the next one," the Nun said.
The doors closed and the elevator started down again. Lance launched another series of slashes at Darth Maul who easily blocked and parried each swing. The elevator stopped again on the 15th floor. The two men stopped fighting and Darth Maul sighed in annoyance. The doors opened and standing in front of the door was a little French poodle.
The poodle removed the cigarette from its mouth and spoke in a heavy French accent. "Oh, Sir...it is so good to see you again." The poodle took a puff on the cigarette, the released smoke taking on a heart shape as it flew towards Lance. "I've missed you."
Lance started pushing the 'close door' button on the elevator.
As the doors closed, Maul gave Lance a weird look.
Lance shook his head at Maul, "Don't ask."
Lance and Maul started fighting again. The hums and clashes of their lightsabers filled the elevator shaft. The numbers counted down to 1 and the elevator stopped. Both men were panting and sweating. The doors opened and two Jedi approached the elevator.
"We'll handle this," Qui-Gon Jinn stated.
Lance turned off his lightsaber. "He's all yours."
Lance exited the elevator and Qui-Gon Jinn and his Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi entered the elevator. Lance could hear the sounds of their combat as the elevator started back up the shaft.
Lance smiled. "It's good to be back."