No hero, no monster, just human.
[Sequel to I did what I had to do] : AU. The curse is broken, and now, Hansel can be freed, despite what he did. Because, after all, he wasn't the real culprit in this story. But he also has to deal with his past lies. Doesn't take into account his link with Zelena. Well, it doesn't take into account anything which happened post 7x15. Law Believer friendship. Glass Believer.
When Henry had learned that Nick was the candy killer, he didn't succeed to believe it at first.
Because, even if he didn't know Nick really well, this one was his friend, and he was sure as hell that this one just couldn't be a murderer.
He had seen Jacinda's face become pale with shock, as she was hearing from Rogers that Nick, the man she used to love and who was now her friend was a murderer.
This one, as Henry, had felt her legs become really weak and her knees began to tremble, and she internally thanked Rogers for asking them to sit down before hearing what he had to tell to them.
"It can't be… Jacinda had muttered, horrified, it just can't true !
- Nick is someone good, Henry had added, astonished. He could never do something like that !"
Really grave, Rogers had looked at them with such a serious and really, really sorry air on his face, that they had immediately both understood that it was not a joke, and that it was bloody real.
Nick was a murderer.
Nick had killed two women, two innocent women, for no reason.
And it didn't seem like he was going to stop, hadn't Rogers and Weaver succeeded to stop him in time.
Then, Henry blinked, before frowning, remembering what Nick had said the other evening, before they all left each other, and came back at their own home.
The exact same thing that Rogers had himself remembered sooner.
"The answer may be just under your nose… Henry finally said, as comprehension was appearing in his eyes at the sentence. It was not just a banal sentence, it was true. And he knew it. He was… joking ! Joking about what he had just did, as if… as if it was not monstrous."
Horrified, he looked up at Rogers.
"What kind… what kind of person dares to joke about a murder exactly ?
- A terrible person, Rogers answered. Some kind of monster, I guess.
- Did he… did he say why he did this ? And by the way, did he confess his crime at all ? Did you find evidences that might indicate that he really did this ? Jacinda asked to the policeman, still wanting to believe that maybe, her ex and Lucy's father was not a terrible monster and a man who didn't hesitate assassinating two women with cold blood !
- Yes, yes, and again yes… We found the candy boxes and the mask he used to commit his murders in his car… And he admitted he did them… He confessed he was the candy killer, he never tried denying this. Jacinda, Henry, I am sorry, but… you have to accept that our friend is… a criminal."
The policeman's face was now twisted by a terrible grimace, as if he didn't want at all to believe what he was saying.
As if he was feeling like to say these words aloud would make them be so damn more real.
A thing he didn't want, for sure.
"Tell me, officer, Jacinda repeated, obstinate, why did he do this ?
She just wanted to know, to understand. Because it was just feeling like it was absurd to her. Why would Nick, a happy man, a lawyer who liked his job and his life, become a serial killer, a freaking murderer just in one moment ?
It had no sense !
- According to Weaver, there is an explanation. Nick used to have a sister, some years ago. She died, and, still according to what Weaver told me, she was killed by the members of a cult or of a sect, I don't really know the difference to say the truth… Apparently, doctor Sage, and the baker who were killed were both members of this cult. And Nick thinks that they are responsible of his sister's death.
- Is it… true ? Henry asked.
Rogers shrugged.
- I… I don't know. Eloise Gardener seems also to be one of them, but I have absolutely no idea of what is true and what is not in this story…"
Then, some seconds later, Jacinda's face became full of horror, as she seemed to remember something else.
She put her hand on her mouth, an expression of pure sadness and horror on her face.
"Oh no… she said with fear. What… what am I going to tell to Lucy ? I mean… how am I going to tell her that her father is… a murderer ?
Other tears appeared in her eyes, and Henry gently pressed his hand in her.
- Hum… I can be with you if this is what you want. Maybe that if we do this together… It will be less worst."
Jacinda tried to smile awkwardly.
- Thanks, Henry… I think it will help… Because I know I can't do this alone…"
§§§§
They didn't even have time to do so.
Some hours later, after Regina used successfully on Henry the cure that had been given to her by Drizella before she left, then, the curse was broken, and all the witches were arrested as Gold got his powers back (finally…).
Well, except Gothel, who, after fighting against her daughter, was turned into a tree, and would hopefully never come back.
As he felt the wave of magic cross through him, Hansel had a little smile.
Not because he believed that it meant that he would be freed soon, but because he knew that now, Henry was safe.
And, more than that, he would come back to his family, to his True Love, this dear Ella, and the thing is that Hansel could not have been more happier for his friend.
He looked at himself in a mirror, and had a bitter smile.
He didn't like what he was seeing.
Hansel was not blind, he knew as hell that his actions hadn't been totally… moral, to use a euphemism.
But neither were Gothel's or the blind witch's one.
He knew he was twisted and broken, just as Drizella's had been by her mother's actions, and that was the only reason why he didn't blame her totally, because she was not the great responsible of his misery, Gothel was.
When Rumplestiltskin had announced to him that she was dead and gone forever, he had a smile of pure joy and relief.
Not satisfaction, or irony or sarcasm, or anything else.
He was just… happy.
Almost… in peace, Gold would have said, remembering the young man's look as this one was learning that all the coven's witches (except Drizella, who didn't know everything, and was mostly manipulated by Gothel) would be kept in prison for their crime, which was nothing but, well… just wanting to destroy all humanity which was on earth and which was without powers !
(Yeah, not a little plan, that's sure…)
In fact, it had been the thing that had made him stop pretending that he was okay, and, at his own stupefaction, the policeman/Dark One had seen him completely crumble in front of him and suddenly burst into tears.
Just as if, all these years ago, he had always tried to stay strong and never show any weakness, despite his pain and despite how broken he was, yes, it was as if now, he knew that he could do it.
That his nightmare was over.
He would finally get what Gretel and him never had the chance to have.
Justice.
Justice would be made to them.
And it was something else too which was offered to him : the admission of what he had lived, what he had suffered from.
These tears were all the one he never let himself cry before, the one he had internally cried for his sister, tears of sadness, of joy, of relief.
It looked like he could finally heal, now.
Wiping the tears, feeling like a great weight had been just taken from his shoulders, he tried to gain back his composure, and looked at Gold.
"Tell me, he asked, are you going to free me or not ?"
Rumplestiltskin immediately smirked, amused by the man's behavior.
"Well, the thing is that you have your head screwed on right, don't you ?"
Hansel was totally right.
He had the right to be freed, regarding to what he had done and regarding to all the past criminals who were there, wandering quietly in Hyperion Heights, himself being surely the first one.
Hook had admitted that he had been totally wrong about Hansel, just when you took into account Hansel's victims : two dangerous and evil and terrible women vs his own victims, it was easy to see which one of them deserved the most to be in prison, well, if we were in a normal world, where magic didn't exist and where people couldn't live for centuries or crush heart literally fucking speaking.
So, yes, as a lot of people, who knew now who the witches were, Gold agreed totally with the fact that Hansel had to be freed.
And to see a psychiatrist too, but that would be for later.
"Indeed, you will… But at first, there is someone who wants to talk to you. In private."
The policeman immediately left the room, and Hansel became really pale as he saw that the person in question was simply Henry Mills, looking at him with severity, crossing him arms.
Hansel tried to smile, even though he was not that confident at all.
"Hello Henry.
- Hello Jack. Or must I call you Hansel ?
- Call me as you want… I am Jack as much as I am Hansel…
- Then, the other man asked him, sitting in front of him, why did you change your name ?
- Because it was easier not to be Hansel anymore ! Because I just wanted to forget what the blind witch had done to me and my sister. I wanted to forget the scars, even though I knew I could never erase them from my skin.
Henry frowned with surprise.
- The scars ? Which scars ?
Hansel had a terribly sad and forced chuckle.
- You see, Henry, you may already know a version of my story, but trust me, just trust me… Mine is not as bright as the one you know."
Grimacing with pain as the gesture, he showed them to him by himself, and Henry became pale.
"Oh gods ! He exclaimed with horror, seeing the terribly red marks which were on his friend's arms and skin. Did she… did she really do it ? The blind witch…
- Yes ! Of course she did… She put into her fire, and she burned my arms. And she used her magic to make sure it would never go away."
He grimaced again as he felt Henry delicately put his hand on his scars, before this one immediately put it away.
"It still hurts, right ? He asked him with worry."
And they both knew he meant it in the two ways : physically as well as mentally.
"It bloody does, Hansel answered him sharply."
The Author then looked at him in the eyes, with concern in them.
"Why didn't you tell me ? I could have helped you !
- You think so ? Do you really think I didn't try telling you ? You really think I… Hansel took his head in his hands. I couldn't be Hansel anymore. Hansel had scars on his arms, Hansel lost his parents and was abandoned by them, Hansel lost his sister, Hansel lost everything. I couldn't be Hansel anymore because Hansel… Hansel was broken. And when I became Jack, everything changed. Because I could be someone else. Someone good, someone strong, someone better.
And he finally smiled.
- Henry… you made me become someone else. Before you, I didn't have a lot of friends, I didn't easily trust people – except my sister – because of my past. He had a little laugh, some tears still being in his eyes. And then, you came there, coming from absolutely nowhere, you, the Author, the prince, the hero…
You were everything I was not, how couldn't I be friend with you ? You named me the Giant Killer, and finally, for once, I could be perceived as a hero. And I realized that yes, maybe that I could be something else than just Hansel, the orphan. I could be Jack."
Henry really tried to smile.
"So, that's not because you didn't trust me that you didn't want to tell me you were Hansel ?
- I wanted to tell you… You know, just after I arrived at the Resistance's camp, I wanted to tell you, because Henry, you're my best friend, and… And I wanted to stop lying about it, but…
- But you then discovered that Gretel was dead. And everything bad you lived came back in your mind.
- Yes. My sister was gone, and Hansel could do nothing but coming back in me…
- You decided to kill the witches of the coven at this precise moment ?
- Yes, and no. To say the truth… I decided to punish and kill them just before your mother cast the Dark Curse. When I realized the witch I was holding next to me was the blind witch and that these witches were the one of the coven, when I saw you there, lying on the ground, poisoned and dying, when I saw Ella's desperate look… I knew I had to stop them. "
Henry suddenly blinked.
"You did this for me ?
Hansel shrugged.
- Partly. For Gretel, for myself, and in order to make it easier as possible to make the curse be broken."
To Hansel's surprise, Henry slowly began to laugh.
His friend raised an eyebrow.
"You… find it funny ?
- No, but… You know… Hansel, since I am ten years old I have known/met a lot of villains/antagonists or people with… a "gray moral", I would say… My adoptive mother, my step-father, my grand-father, my great-grand-father, my aunt… And the more I say that, the more I am realizing that almost the half of my family is constituted of villains/past antagonists. Hell, even my kind of mother-in-law was one !
- What do you mean ?
- All these people… wanted power or revenge, or to change their life, and I think you're one of the few people I met who turned his revenge against the right person. My adoptive mother hated my grand-mother while her own mother was the real monster, my aunt hated my adoptive mother while she had done nothing to her, my step-father hurt Belle in order to hurt Rumplestiltskin… You always tried to hurt just the one who hurt you…
- And so ?
- Hansel, when you tried to kill these witches, even if you were doing this for yourself, you were trying to do something good. You were not a hero, that's true, when you killed doctor Sage and the blind witch. But you have to know that, for sure, you were not a monster either. You're just human.
- Thanks Henry… That's really important for me."
His friend smiled again.
"So, you're Hansel from the famous tale Hansel and Gretel, and not Jack… Is there something else you hid from me ?
Hansel shrugged.
- Well, I'm gay and I find it really ironic that the curse decided to put me with Ella/Jacinda under the curse, as kind of a punishment for both me, you, and her. And Lucy obviously."
Henry had an amused chuckle.
"After learning that you're a witches killer, I guess no other confession coming from you could shock me now… Rumple and Killian are right about wanting to free you. Well, regarding to what they did, they would be freaking hypocrites, if they didn't accept to do so… When I still thought that you were just Nick, a serial killer, a murderer of two innocent women, I thought you were a monster. Now, I know you're not. You're my friend."
Some seconds later, his face suddenly sharpened.
"But there is something you really need, Hansel. Help.
Hansel frowned.
- I don't… I don't need help ! What makes you say that ?
- When I was a child, I was seeing a psychiatrist. Mostly because my mother wanted me to think that fairy tales were not real, but that's not the point. My biological mother did see one too, and like you, she didn't have an easy life. She opened herself to him and it helped her get better.
- Henry, do you really think that if I didn't succeed to tell you about my problems and my past wounds, you, my best friend, the one who knows me best, just after Gretel, do you really think I can do so with a stranger ?
- Well, Archie is really good at making people talk to him about how they feel. And by the way, this is one of the conditions about your liberation… That you see a psychiatrist as soon as possible, preferably in Storybrooke, if you want to go to the town with us.
- So, I just have to do it without having any choice ? Henry, I am not some mad serial killer, okay ? Now that all the witches who ruined my life are imprisoned, I am not going to be a danger again !"
Henry sighed.
"Hansel… I just want to help you, okay ? Your sister is dead, and you got your revenge and justice, all the villains had been arrested… Don't you think this is now time for you to think about yourself a little ? Maybe that it would be good if you accepted the fact that… you need to talk to someone about what you lived. I know that psychiatrists are not really… a thing in the Enchanted Forest, the original or the one in which we lived, but… As Nick, I guess you know what a psychiatrist does. I mean, didn't you see one for your scars or you past trauma ?
- It never happened for real, Henry. And there is a great difference between having a trauma because of a burning house, and having a trauma because you know that your sister is dead.
- I know… My fake family, they were never real, and now I know that this pain is not as well… But you must understand that you do need to leave all these painful things behind you… But not by forgetting who you were, but by accepting the fact that these painful memories are real, and that they hurt. You can't always keep running away from Hansel, Jack. You can be both of them, and maybe finally heal.
- Can I, Henry ? The young man asked him, afraid of hoping it could work for real. Do you really think that I can heal ? Even after… all of this ? After what I lived ?
Henry smiled at him with confidence.
- I know things about villains. And so do I about traumas… I know people who were broken because of their past, and who succeeded to heal. It can work for you, Hansel."
Hansel nodded his head, sighing.
"Alright, Henry, I will… try this. I will come with you and your family in Storybrooke and see… Who exactly ?
- Archie Hooper… Well, Jiminy Cricket.
Hansel's eyes opened wide.
- Your psychiatrist is Jiminy Cricket ?
- Emma asked me the same question when she learned who I thought he was… Yep, he is ! And trust me, he is a damn good one."
His friend tried to smile another time.
"Again, Henry, thanks… for everything.
- You're welcome… It's the best thing I can do, after I couldn't see… all the scars you were hiding from me."
§§§§
When he left the prison, rapidly followed by Hansel, Henry let this one go at his "home" and take all his things before leaving Hyperion Heights.
And if some people looked at him in a weird way, no one complained about the fact that he was free.
He had tried to save them, to stop monsters from waking up and remembering and then killing all of them or almost.
Walking quietly in Hyperion Heights, Henry couldn't help but smile as he saw Robyn and Alice together, this one being close to her father (who had been finally cured thanks to Gold's, Regina's and Zelena's efforts. Oh, the irony…), and for the first time since a long time, he felt like things would be okay now.
Putting his phone out of his pocket, he then dialed Archie's number, and had a little smile as he heard the cricket's voice finally resonate, hearing it for the first time in years.
"Hello ?
- Hey, Archie ?
- Henry ! Oh, I am happy to hear you… I heard about the curse and all the problems you and your family had… Are you okay ?
- I'm perfectly fine now, thank you. Me, my family and some of the other inhabitants of Hyperion Heights, we are going to go back home, while some other will go to the Enchanted Forest. There was something I wanted to ask you.
- What is it ?
- It's about one of my friend, named Hansel. Knowing without seeing it that Archie had now an air of surprise on his face, he chuckled. Yes, I know, I know… Just like the Hansel we already know in Storybrooke… Just as Ella, he is coming from another version of the story.
- What does it have to do with me ?
- He has some… troubles, I would say. And he needs to see someone, and I wanted to know if you would accept to take him as your patient.
- Well, Henry, of course, I can see him when he wants me to…
- Thanks a lot Archie… You can trust me, he had a really harsh life.
- I will try to help him as much as I can.
- Again, thank you… I see you back when I am in Storybrooke. Bye.
- Goodbye, Henry."
Henry took a deep breath and smiled.
Yes, he knew, now, things would be olay.