SETTING: READ THIS! This is a sequel to GOKU AND BULMA, which was a sequel to PICCOLO AND CHI CHI. If you haven't read either, then to get you up to speed, just know that Piccolo is married to Chi Chi, and Goku is married to Bulma (to find out how all that happened, read the fics). Piccolo was there at Goten's birth and growing up years, thus he is the only father Goten has known. Ok. That sums it up. This takes place 15 years after GOKU AND BULMA. Goten is 19, Trunks is 20, and Marron is 15.
ON WITH THE STORY!
"So… How long have you been working for Capsule Corp?" Goten asked a delicious looking brunette who he'd managed to single out amongst the crowd. To his immense delight, the New Year's Eve party at Capsule Corp. came complete with babes. It hadn't taken him a half hour to finish with the pleasantries and start carousing.
She sipped at a glass of champagne. "Six months. And you?" Her brilliant green eyes were hypnotic. It was like she blinked in slow motion, which helped him to keep his gaze on her face, even though the low 'V' in the front of her dress demanded his attention. Good thing I've had plenty of practice…
"Oh, I'm not an employee," he smiled. "I'm a friend of the family."
Her brows lifted in intrigue. "Oh really? How do you know them?"
Well, he thought crazily, My biological father has known Bulma since he was five, and coincidentally, they're married. So in a sense that makes Trunks, who was fathered by another man, and I stepbrothers, except that my actual dad is a green, pointy-eared alien, so I guess my older brother Gohan is more of a step brother to Trunks than I am since I never called Goku my father…
"Hmmm?"
He shook his head and went the simplest route. "Trunks and I are best friends."
"Aaahh," she said and gave him a smile then that made his heart do summersaults. He mentally buffed his knuckles on his shirt at the victory. Mentioning his relation to Trunks was always the 'filter 'question, as his 20-year old buddy seemed to be the coveted stud with the ladies. And considering that she still seemed wholly interested in him and not his friend was a sign that things were progressing.
Nice…
And then, as if on some twisted cue, her gaze diverted from his face to someone approaching behind him. Before he had a chance to turn, a strong hand yanked his shoulder and spun him around.
It was Trunks. He had a bottle, not a glass, but a bottle of champagne in his left hand and it was sloshing over the sides as he tried to keep his balance. His tie had been loosened, and the first few buttons of his shirt undone. His blue eyes were glazed red with inebriation, and he was beside himself with snickers. The guy didn't drink often, but when it did it was never pretty.
Agh, Trunks! You know you can't hold your liquor!
"Goten!" he laughed, his words slurred. "You gotta come shhee this!"
Remind me again how it is that so many women want you over me? He glanced back at his lady friend whose expression was more disgusted than impressed. "I'm sorta busy…right now."
Trunks slapped him on the arm. It was a gesture that would have sent anyone else flying across the room and Goten found himself wondering if he was going to spend the rest of the evening protecting people from his drunken friend instead of trying to get a date.
"You don't…understand…" he slurred, getting uncomfortably close to Goten, spilling the pinkish liquid on his shirt.
"Trunks," he hissed between his teeth. "I'm busy!"
"Goku spiked Piccolo's water!" Trunks blurted out, following the words up with a loud guffaw.
THAT caught Goten's attention. "He…what…?"
"No sh-shee-shit. You gotta c-come sheee this."
Goten turned his attention to the fox he'd been chatting with. "If you'll excuse me," he apologized. "I'll be right back…"
She nodded curtly, and Goten let Trunks drag him by the elbow through the crowds towards the small ballroom at the end of the building's east wing. On the way Trunks hooked his other arm around 15-year old Marron, who squealed, and blushed when she saw who it was.
"Come on, Marron. You gotta see this TOO," he said in the same saturated tone. And then slowed his pace as he took in her attire. "Hey. Ya look real niiiice, t'night."
Her shiny blonde hair was curled out at the shoulders, and contrasted sharply with a slinky black dress that showed more leg than material. The first thing Goten realized was that she indeed looked nice. The second thing he wondered was how she got out of Krillin's household wearing that dress. But the third thing that crossed his mind was that Trunks had no place encouraging the girl, as she'd had a hopeless crush on him since age eleven.
As it was, his compliment turned her flush crimson. "See…what?" she managed as she bounced against his bicep.
Trunks just giggled in return. She looked back at Goten, and he simply shrugged. Goten could hear the DJ blasting a techno version of 'Classical Gas' from the hall, and when they entered, Goten's first impression was that he'd walked into a circus.
Goku was curled up on the floor, clutching at his gut as though it would burst. Tears were streaming out of his eyes, and his face was twisted in the most red-faced grimace of laughter that Goten had ever seen. Even the man's heehaws had been reduced to helium-pitched squeaks. He was hysterical.
Bulma was leaning over him, with one hand on her hip and the other one shaking an angry finger in his face. Her rantings could be heard clearly over the throbbing music. "What the hell did you give him, Goku?" she yelled, her words having no effect whatsoever on the laughing man. "Yeah. Real funny, you dumb lug. It won't be so hilarious when he pulls out of it and tries to kill you!"
"Piccolo!" Goten's mother screamed, and he looked across the room to see her shaking her fist at the ceiling. "You get down from there! This is NO way to act at a formal party!"
Trunks collapsed on the floor beside him in a fit of laughter, Marron gasped and flung her hands to her mouth, and when Goten finally looked up he went rigid with shock.
Swinging like a spider monkey from the room's massive ceiling fan was Piccolo, his cape fluttering behind him like a bed sheet. His legs were twitching with the music on beats one and three, instead of two and four, and the lackadaisical grin on his face would have put most comedians out of business.
"This can't be happening…" Goten muttered, dumbstruck.
"Piccolo! I mean it!" Chi Chi yelled.
Piccolo looked down at her as he spun, his big ears catching on his arms as he twisted to keep her in his view. Then he giggled, and Goten thought that it was the worst noise he'd ever heard his dad make.
Gohan came barreling into him. "I heard something was…up…" His eyes bulged, and his jaw dropped mid-sentence as he saw the namek's behavior. "No way…"
Suddenly, as if spurred on by the audience, Piccolo started to do the eggbeater with his body, throwing a counter spin on the ceiling fan. The room accessory started to moan and shudder in protest. Suddenly, a bolt popped.
Another one went.
Another…
"Look out! It's coming down!" someone cried.
Before anyone could recover from the shocking visual enough to help, the fan dislodged from the ceiling completely and screams filled the room as it came crashing to the floor, namek and all. Piccolo managed to throw his body on the DJ's equipment, bringing the music to a static scratch halt.
It would have been completely silent had Goku's and Trunks' laughter not jumped up two octaves and filled the entire room. Much higher, and their hysterics would soar right off the scale of human perception…
Piccolo lifted his head and moaned. Goten ran over to him, feeling his face blush in embarrassment for his poor dad. But his mother beat him to it. She was belligerent.
"No substance abuse can excuse this sort of behavior!" she yelled, leaning over him. "You've embarrassed me! You've embarrassed Bulma! You've ruined their ceiling fan! The DJ's equipment!"
Piccolo just stared dumbly up at her, and shook his head as though in an effort to keep his eyes from crossing. Then an ear-splitting grin broadened his face. His cheeks tinged purple as his gaze trailed up and down her body. He slowly lifted himself to his feet. "Mmmmm. Chi Chi…"
"No 'Mmm. Chi Chi for YOU, mister-HEY!"
She screamed as he clutched her to him and started nuzzling her neck. She swatted at him unsuccessfully, her face flushing.
Goten and Gohan arrived at the scene about the same time, and saved their mother from the public display of affection. As Gohan circled his arm around her and pulled her away, she huffed at Piccolo, speechless.
"Okay now, dad…" Goten chuckled nervously as he hoisted himself up under Piccolo's arm for support. "Nobody wants to see that.
Gohan caught Goten's eye. "You got him?"
Goten nodded and started heading for the door. "Well dad, looks like it's time to go home," he said with a sigh.
Piccolo turned his head and grinned like a boy. "HI son," he said loudly, his deep voice twice as disturbing with the uncharacteristic cheerfulness. "Did you find a girl to kiss you when the clock strikes twelve?"
"No, dad," he said as he eased Piccolo towards the exit. To his relief, Bulma was over talking to the DJ, no doubt arranging to pay for the broken equipment. That meant they only had to make it past Goku who was leaning up against the wall, his earlier fit of laughter just barely starting to subside. Until he saw them coming, that was…
"Ah, man. Pic," Goku said, his voice raw and hoarse. "I don't think I've EVER laughed so hard. I just thought you'd get a little tipsy, but" his words trailed off in hiccupping snickers.
As if in some dim remnant of his sober self, Piccolo glared at Goku. But the psychological daggers only lasted three seconds before he broke, hanging his head and laughing through his nose. "Did you see me up there?" he stammered in between chuckles. "ON THE CEILING?"
Wheezing, Goku slid down the wall in another lapse of control. Goten was surprised the man hadn't yet wet himself.
"Oo-ho-kay, now," Goten consoled as he spurred onward. "Let's get going-"
"Ten. Nine. Eight…" came the countdown from outside, and Goten lost his grip on his dad as Piccolo spun out from under him. Goten turned in time to see him toss Gohan aside as he scooped up Chi Chi in his arms. She was more flushed than flustered, so Goten let them be.
Goku apparently hadn't spent all his energy in hysterics, as he hopped up and tackled Bulma from behind.
"Five. Four…"
Videl came running in. "There you are!" she screamed as she threw her arms around Gohan's neck.
"Two. One. Happy New Year!"
"Great," Goten muttered as everyone around him started kissing. "Just great…" Well, at least he wasn't alone in his solitude. Trunks hadn't had time to single anyone out…either… His breath caught in his throat. Oh, hell…
Trunks had wrapped both arms around little Marron and was kissing her with all the sloppy expertise of a horny drunk. It was unsettling, and it took a great deal of restraint not to pull them apart.
Dude, Trunks. That's not cool… He thought soberly as he watched the two. Now your rejection will hurt her twice as much, not to mention Krillin will have your balls if he finds out.
He shuddered. The kissing finally ended, and he resumed his place beside his father.
"I'll carry him home, mom," he said to Chi Chi as she straightened her dress and wiped her mouth, more than a little embarrassed. She rolled her eyes in exasperation and nodded. Goten shouldered his way under Piccolo's arm again. The namek was all but unconscious by now. Goten could only pray that he'd have no memory of this night.
He made his way towards the open balcony at the west end of the room with the heavy fighter slumped over his back. Then as an afterthought he looked back to make sure Trunks was leaving Marron alone. To his relief, she was gone, and his lavender-haired friend was standing there with the standard, post-mack Cool Aid grin on his face.
Satisfied that the evening was finally under control, he hopped up into the sky with Piccolo and headed home.