title: read between the lines
summery: gray's never told anyone he loves them.
note: this is not up to my usual standards. i started it a while back but after the nepal earthquake...but then chapter 432 came out and i just couldn't resist the feels. i finished in the past hour. so forgive me.
Gray tells his mother by being the best son he can.
Gray never comes inside with muddy boots. He complains about his food sometimes but always eats all his vegetables. He picks up his toys regularly and he helps his mother do the dishes. He plays nice with everyone. Gray hugs her feet when she comes to pick him up. He tells Mika all about his day and never leaves out any details. He's always a good boy to her. Gray hopes his other is proud of him.
And he still hopes she is when he leaves lilies and a silent "I love you mom" in her hastily made grave.
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Gray tells his father by being bratty and good at the same time.
Gray scowls at his dad and sticks out his tongue at him. He still asks for his dad's help when he can't figure out how to solve a problem. Gray always sits next to his dad at dinner and nudges his dad's leg to start a foot war. He still waits into the wee hours of night for Silver to come home. He tags along on hunting trips and sometimes be loud enough to scare the rabbits away. But even then his dad grins at him and says he is glad to have Gray for his son.
Gray prays his dad knows that he is proud to have Silver for his father when he finally passes away.
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Ur and Lyon learns of his emotions by his eyes.
Gray knows that they could tell how much they mean to him by that. So he always looks at Ur after he finishes a new spell to ask for approval. He always throws glares that shows admiration at Lyon when he masters something before Gray. He looks at them with all the sincerity and love he can manage and hopes they know.
The ice mage learns that they do know when Ur gives him one last glance in the eyes and Lyon cries in front of him for the very first and last time.
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Gray tells Erza he loves her with his words.
He never says it directly because he just can't. So instead he tells her it's okay to cry. He asks her about her missions even when he couldn't care less. He tells her she's so strong that it's scary when he can see the well-masked insecurity in her posture. He demands she rests when she's pushed herself too far. He tells her how much she means to him in stories about his past and hopes about his future.
She tells him the same by her rough words of caring, too.
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He tells Lucy how much she means to him in his smiles.
He throws her a smile when she's scared out of her wits. He gives her smirks when she's being stupidly cute. He grins at her when she's unsure of herself and he hopes she understands. Lucy is a girl of words. No matter how high her walls could be, Lucy's words always escape over them and she lets her feeling be known to all. He can never be sure if his feelings reach her because he's quarantined himself and not even words can ever get out. He isn't sure if his smiles do either.
When she slaps him in the face and tells him he's her friend, he finally knows that she understood.
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Gray tells Natsu using his fists.
When they throw punch after punch, kicks after kick, juvenile insults and let their magic fly, he tells the dragon slayer more than he's ever told anyone. His pain, frustration, longing, loneliness reaches Natsu every time Gray hits him. The ice mage's joy, relief, trust, believes and even happiness is somehow evident to Natsu throughout his fights. And somehow Gray knows almost everything that goes through Natsu's thick skull too, after a fight.
A punch. You're my best friend.
A head butt. I know.
The grin or growl when after a fight's over or Erza has pull them apart is what make their bond so strong.
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Gray says I love you in a lot of ways to a lot of people. He has found a way to let his feelings reach others using words that never come out like he wants. Maybe because words aren't really enough for people to feel the depths of his emotions; so he's way of saying I love you is pretty unique. But the way he tells Juvia about his feelings somehow still seems the most special somehow.
You see, Gray tells Juvia he loves her with his entire being.
He tells her with his eyes. He tells her with his smiles. He tells her with his voice and his words. He tells her with his actions. Everything he does, mutters "I love you Juvia."
Be it the reassuring hand on her shoulder when she's tensed or eye contact that lasts a little longer than it should in a battle. In the way he criticizes her posture in training sessions or the way he laughs when she's being particularly herself. It's there in the way he tells her everything he's never told anyone else and allows his glass cage to break for her.
But Juvia is yet realize that.
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Over the years Gray realized his feelings do reach people even when he doesn't say them. Actions are louder than words, after all. But however, actions are also much, much, much slower. So Gray is patient. He waits and waits until his feeling are finally through.
But when Juvia throws away her jacket, back against his and eyes shining oh so bright with fierce determination, Gray can't help but think that it's okay if she never interprets the meaning behind the way his actions. Because maybe, someday he will be able to say those words―that rest just at the edge of his tongue―to her.
Gray is almost impatient for that day to arrive.
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Fin.