„Hmm…" three letters and three dots was the peculiar message that stared back at him from the screen of his laptop. The PM has been waiting for several days now in the overflowing inbox of the dating page that his oh so hilarious brother has secretly created behind his back.
He had discovered just a week ago about the sick joke that Itachi has pulled. After hearing hysterical laughter that lasted longer than five minutes in the room beside his own, Sasuke decided to simply enter and see what could be so damned funny.
Not even half inside the room Sasuke froze in place. Eyes widening in shock when he took in what exactly made Itachi hold his stomach, while laughing so hard that tears were streaming down his face. The large curved screen that was placed in the middle of the desk displayed a picture of a three year old, nude Sasuke happily poking at sand with a tiny shovel. "Come and play with me!" was written in big letters at the bottom of the pic. And if it was not nearly enough to make him faint, being displayed in such a way on some random internet page, the open message box, overlaying any further content that may have been included there, stated "Ohh little one, I just have the right equipment for deep excavation work!". The message was accompanied by a picture of a man with tousled grey hair and a cloth hiding the greater part of his face being in fact the ONLY piece of clothing covering his body. The hips pressed forward suggestively for more emphasis.
It took two more seconds until the desire to kill overwhelmed Sasuke. He moved to punch his dear brother with all the strength he could muster. To smash the face that resembled his own, having him plead for forgiveness and denying it with every following punch and hard kick was the only thing that buzzed through his mind. He wanted revenge and he would get it no matter what!
Unfortunately for him Itachi was already on his feet, having sensed the rage emanating from the smaller Uchiha. Itachi was an excellent fighter and even though he was still laughing albeit not as intensely as before he was easily able to dodge all attacks, making Sasuke seethe in anger.
"Fuck you Itachi! How dare you humiliate me, you asshole!" Sasuke shouted out infuriated, aiming to connect his fist with any part of his brother's body. Instead he felt himself being grabbed by the arm and with the force of his own momentum Sasuke was yanked forward colliding hard with the wall. The move ending fluently with both arms being held behind a lithe back, while Itachi snaked his second arm around a graceful throat squeezing the remaining air out of his agitated sibling. The impact making Sasuke cough and grit his teeth. In an attempt to free himself Sasuke kicked behind finding the space empty where a leg could have been expected. Keeping in flow of their dance, Itachi moved smoothly out of harm's way, instantly deciding that the floor would provide him better control over his struggling brother. With a final maneuver the remaining leg was destabilized both falling to the floor, Itachi placing himself on the back of the smaller body.
"Foolish little brother, what are you a horse? You know you can't take me on with your current level" the voice informed him still tinged with mirth. "So cool down and let me explain".
"What the fuck is there to explain you pissbucket? You made me the laughing stock on the fucking internet! You are so going to pay for this!" growled Sasuke, his face pressed into the carpet, that smoothed the force of his clash, while both of his arms were again secured by Itachi.
"Ahh see, I think that you will thank me eventually…"
"Are you FUCKING INSANE? Thank YOU? You…mngh" Sasuke couldn't ramble further as Itachi used one of his hands to push his head deeper into the fluffy carpet that both of them have selected for Itachi's room a few years ago.
"Tch. You should not interrupt me little brother. That's bad manners." Itachi shook his head, easing his grip a little on the hothead underneath him, giving Sasuke just enough space to breath.
"BAD MANNERS! You are accusing ME of fucking BAD MANNERS while you are whoring me out on the fucking INTERNET to fucking PERVERTS!" – Sasuke shrieked, anger flaring once again and he started to rear up with new found strength.
"Tch." – Itachi would have none of it, unceremoniously knocking Sasuke's head against the floor with a bit more force this time, smiling gently down as the struggling came to an end once again and he heard a muffled groan, the thick carpet absorbing most of the sounds. So passionate his little brother when teased in the right way, Itachi thought. But the passion was mostly wasted on fighting instead of enjoying his teenage years. And Itachi was fully committed to the goal of making his usually brooding and antisocial sibling come out of his closet and direct his passion towards nicer things in life, even though he may not like it or like HIM as it were for the time being.
Once again providing room for Sasuke to breath Itachi leaned down bringing his lips to a nicely shaped ear. "Are you done? I'd like to continue with my explanation".
"Hn" Sasuke grit out.
"Thank you. As I was telling, I think that you will thank me eventually. As you aren't willing to go out and get yourself some friends I took it upon myself to lower the threshold for you by creating an online profile that you may change as you see fit when I give you the credentials. I want you to start communicating with people that are not part of the family. You are 16, you need to have some healthy relationships and I won't agree anymore with you shutting yourself out from the entire world." Itachi made a short pause.
"Are you done?" Sasuke muffled.
"Tch. Yes, you wish to add something?"
"Yeah, just get off me, my fucking arms hurt." Sasuke couldn't hold a tiny wince as Itachi released him and fluently moved away giving Sasuke space to stand up and face him. His body aching, his head throbbing, he eyed Itachi wearily for some time. He knew that his older brother wished for him to be more like a normal teenager, they had the same fucking discussion every damned week now and so far he could withdraw himself one way or the other. This time it seemed like Itachi would not back down any more, the fucking stunt was proof enough. He didn't even have to argue what would happen if he were to delete the stupid profile the moment he had his fingers on it. Itachi would just create a new one or even several, far worse than the initial page and he would become paranoid searching the internet day and night for any profiles with embarrassing photos of himself. And there is no telling what personal information Itachi would give out to any random John and Dick on his behalf. There was no escape this time, he would have to comply. Sasuke sighed heavily and looked again at the still visible and highly embarrassing picture of himself and the obnoxious message displayed on the screen.
"Alright I will use it. But I'm not fucking meeting with anybody and you are not to spy on me, are we clear!" Sasuke stated vehemently.
"That will be fine for the moment." Itachi nodded his head in agreement.
"Good, then give me the stupid credentials" Sasuke demanded with less force in his voice now, his head still throbbing from the fight.
Itachi just smirked; his brother was just too cute.