DannyxSam angst-ish fanfic. (geez,whats with me and agnst?)

When this began

I had nothing to say

and I'd get lost in the nothingness

inside of me

I sat on my bed my knees up against my chest tears streeming down my face, I felt like nothing. Lost within my self fighting against all the pain and sorow within my very soul. Life just wasn't fair. Why did it have to be her. I felt so alone and sad. My life just seemed to always go from good to bad. Never good to good. Never. I sat with his picture in my hand, his smiling face, sparkling blue eyes, and his beautiful messy hair. I pulled out my pocket knife and slit my wrist deep letting the blood seep from my arms to my blood red bed spread. nobody would notice the blood stains anyway.

(I was confused)

And I let it all out to find

That I'm not the only person with all these things in mind

In truth I am confused. First off, she only likes him for his human side, while I like-er love him for Both sides. The universe just loves to mess with my mind doesn't it? And then I start to realize that its not just me who doesn't understand his motives. But still why her? I slit another dep gash a few inches above the frst adding onto the amount of blood that was already pouring from my arm.

(Inside of me)

But all the vacancy the words reaeled

Is the only thing I've got left to feel

(nothing to lose)

Just stuck, hollow and alone

And the fault is my own

And the fault is my own

The hollowness has left me numb and cold. It's all i've got left to feel. this icey feeling of pure sorrow drives me to insanity. And i can't help but feel as though its my fault, that i did somthing wrong. I wipe my tears away and slit yet another deep cut into my wrist staring blanky at my wall as blood pours down my already blood soaked arm.

I want to heal

I want to feel

What I thought was never real

I want to let go of the pain I've held so long

(Erase all the pain til it's gone)

I want to heal

I want to feel

Like I'm clouse to something real

I want to find something I've wanted all along

Somewhere I belong

I want this pain to go away, for the cuts on my wrist to go away and heal. I want to feel like Im not alone, real. I want to find that one place I belong. I want to be loved. I want him to notice me and know how much he means to me. Erase this pain and sorrow from my heart and replace it with happiness and love. But theres no hope for me...

And I've got nothing to say

I can't believe I didn't fall Right down on my face

I haven't talked to anyone, really, in months. Im falling apart right down on my face and he doesn't even notice. I let a single tear fall onto my blood covered arm. my hand gripping the knife shaking. I was so angry. but sad all at the same time. at him, and myself.

(I was confused)

Looking everywhere

Only to find that it's not the way I had imagined it all in my mind

Had I just imagined all this up? That he may even like me? That he maybe just maybe, cared that way about me. I find myself looking everywhere in my memmories to know for sure if he really had such feelings for me. It always ends up making me even more confused.

(So what am I)

What do I have but negativity

Cause I can't justify the way everyone is looking at me

What am I? Im a goth, ya, a freak, i don't know maybe, stupid, yes for falling for him. Everyone can tell im upset, even the A-listers. They give my sympathetic looks. I don't like it one bit. They all notice, except him. I started wearing less and less colors, even to the point of wearing black contacts. But does he notice no. he never does and never will. Not that I care. i shove the knife deeper into my arm drawing more blood as I think deper and deeper about this.

(Nothing to lose)

Nothing to gain, hollow and alone

And the fault is my own

And the fault is my own

I still feel as though my feelings of emptyness and hollowness are my own doings, but I can't help but wonder, if maybe, just maybe, it was his fault too? That maybe if he hadn't made me fall for him i wouldn't be in this mess. I would be okay. just maybe. I slit my wrist once more beggining to feel very light headed. I close the knife and put it away. i wipe all the blood away, my head spinnng. i stare at my arm, covered in cuts. i glare at it. Its his fault. If he hadn't made me fall for him i would be okay.

i'd be okay.

I want to heal

I want to feel

What I thought was ever real

I want to let go of the pain I've held so long

(Erase all the pain til it's gone)

I want to heal

I want to feel

Like I'm close to something real

I want to find something I've wanted all along

Somewhere I belong

I want this pain to go away, for the cuts on my wrist to go away and heal. I want to feel like Im not alone, real. I want to find that one place I belong. I want to be loved. I want him to notice me and know how much he means to me. Erase this pain and sorrow from my heart and replace it with happiness and love. But theres no hope for me...

I will never know myself

Until I do this on my own

And I will never feel anything else

Until my wounds are healed

I will never be anything

`Til I break away from me

And I will break away

I'll find myself today

He's killed me. im not myself anymore. im some timid girl searching for blind love. false hope. I want my wounds to go away and heal. I want him to notice me. To ask 'are you okay.' To really care and worry for me. to love me, just maybe, even a little bit. to go back to being the confident and stubborn out spoken girl i once was.

I want to heal

I want to feel

Like I'm somewhere I belong

I want to heal

I want to feel

What I thought was never real

I want to let go of the pain I've held so long

(Erase all the pain til it's gone)

I want to heal

I want to feel

Like I'm close to something real

I want to find something I've wanted all along

Somewhere I belong

I want this pain to go away, for the cuts on my wrist to go away and heal. I want to feel like Im not alone, real. I want to find that one place I belong. I want to be loved. I want him to notice me and know how much he means to me. Erase this pain and sorrow from my heart and replace it with happiness and love. But theres no hope for me...

With one last look at my arm i pass out onto my bed my head pounding and weak from blod loss.

HEY? guess what? THERES GONNA BE YET ANOTHER CHAP! :D R AND R PLZ!