I of course, do not own any X-Men Evo characters. If I did the show would no doubt be late-night only.

If you've never encountered a Cabin Fic before, count yourself among the lucky few. Cabin Fics are stories where two characters are trapped inside some sort of structure and so either a) reveal their deepest secrets to one another or b) have wild monkey-sex. The latter are often called "blanket fics" because the two characters share a blanket in order to stay warm and invariably wind up shagging like hamsters. Both types of fic are usually pointless and involve horrendous OOCness.

So with that in mind, I present…

Cabin Fever
Or "Damn, that's one sexin' blanket."
By N

The cabin was a simple affair - a one-room log structure with a bare fireplace and two small windows that had been shuttered against the cold. A blanket lay in one corner of the room, watched with glassy vigilance by the buck's head mounted above the fireplace. Of the bed the blanket had been stripped from there was no sign; Wolverine had in fact used it as a toboggan one evening some winters past. The fact that he'd been drunk off his ass at the time had been a deciding factor in the cot's fate.

The cabin had stood empty for quite some time and probably would have remained so if not for the blizzard.

- - -

Cabin One - Get to Know Yourself

The door to the cabin banged open, letting in a swirl of snow and two shivering figures. The taller one immediately swept the door shut behind him while the shorter one zipped over to the fireplace.

"No wood. Figures," Pietro Maximoff snarled through chattering teeth. "Agh, I'm freezing!"

"Be thankful we found this dump," Lance Alvers replied, sullenly looking around the cabin. "We COULD still be out in the snow." He stared at the buck's head for a minute, then shuddered. Something about it was decidedly creepy…

Pietro meanwhile had discovered the discarded blanket and had promptly wrapped himself up in it. He peeked out from its folds like an albino sage, still shivering.

"Lance," he said. "Go outside and find some wood."

"What? No fuckin' way!"

"But I'm cold!"

"Like I ain't?" Lance strode across the room and grabbed the blanket, attempting to pull it away from the other boy. "Gimme."

"No! Mine! Minemineminemine!" Pietro bitch-slapped Lance rapidly across the face a few times, causing him to let go of the blanket.

"Ow…" Lance sat on the ground next to Pietro, who was making satisfied humming noises, for a few minutes. At long last a thought crossed his mind. "Ow. Hey, we could SHARE the blanket."

"No."

"Aw, come on."

"No. Mine."

"It'll be warmer!" Lance whined. "You know… body heat and all that."

Pietro's eyebrows shot up. "Body heat?" he repeated.

"Yeah."

Pietro jabbed a finger into Lance's chest. "You PERVERT! I KNEW you wanted my sweet, sweet ass!"

Lance blinked. "What?!"

"Oh, you don't fool me," Pietro scoffed. "That hoary old 'let's generate some body heat, bay-bee' line? Please. No wonder you never get laid. Still, I can't blame you for trying." He ran a hand through his hair and adopted a sultry pout. "God, I'm sexy…"

Lance stared. "Well," he admitted. "You are kinda cute I guess…" He snuggled closer to the speedster, attempting to be suave and failing spectacularly.

"I think I just thought of a perfect way to warm up," Pietro said, his voice slightly husky.

"Yeah?" Lance whispered, leaning closer.

Pietro shoved him away impatiently. "Yeah. I'm gonna masturbate. Go stand over in that corner for a few minutes, huh?"

Blink. Blink. Stare.

Swearing under his breath, Lance went.

"And no peeking!"

- - -