When I walked back out the door and down the two worn steps towards the car, my entire world had taken a kick to the stomach for the second time in mere months.
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Not satisfied with burning Mary alive on the ceiling, Fate had decided I needed to be informed on the existence of the supernatural, a sub-stratum of our reality known only to a bunch of weirdos, called hunters who seemingly dedicated their lives to the extermination of monsters which preyed on humans.
But then, I had only myself to blame for coming into possession of this knowledge.
I'd never for a moment let up on the search for the why of Mary's death. I was no intellectual, though you didn't need to be Einstein to understand her passing was unnatural.
Now that I did know the truth, though, just what was I going to do with it?
Missouri hadn't been able to give me a precise answer to all my questions. 'It could have been many things, John, but fire usually runs with demons.'
I could feel my eyeballs bulging from their sockets. 'Demons, as from…. Hell? They actually exist?' I asked, shocked enough to collapse boneless onto her couch.
'They actually do,' Missouri confirmed, 'them and a whole barrowload of nasties you wouldn't believe. The stuff of nightmares, from werewolves to vampires to witches.'
I stared up at her, hoping she'd been toying with me, but impossible as it was to believe, I did. She couldn't have invented a story so outlandish.
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Outside, I stood for a moment to stare at the Impala, I raked my eyes over her length. She contained all that was left of Mary- our two kids.
Dean had just turned five and Sammy nine months.
We'd been staying with friends while the insurance settled on the house. They'd told me it could be repaired; that only the nursery had actually been torched. The foundations were stable as was the ground floor.
But I had no intention of going back there to live, not in the place Mary had died so atrociously, and especially not now, when Missouri had more than hinted at the fire's 'supernatural' origin.
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Sighing, I peered through the rear window. Dean had Sammy in his arms. Trying to separate him from his baby brother was almost impossible since his mom had died. The kid passed his days hovering at Sam's side when he couldn't hold him close.
The baby was gurgling quietly, as if even Sam understood there was no reason to rejoice.
Dean noticed my shadow on the glass and stared out at me.
When had his eyes taken on that adult gaze, I asked myself?
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My heart did a somersault then.
If something supernatural had invaded our home that night, then who was to say they'd finished with us? What if their target wasn't just Mary, what if they were waiting to pick us off one by one at their convenience?
That's when the decision was taken in my mind. The boys and I could never be separated, nor could we settle down permanently in any one place. It was too dangerous.
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I ran a hand over the Impala's roof. She was a big car, ample enough to house a father and his two small sons.
At least for now. The future? It was still to be written.
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The End