Disclaimer: Gilmore Girls is Amy Sherman-Palladino's toy, I'm just playing in her sandbox. no infringment intended.
unbeta'd, any and all errors are mine.
comments are appreciated. tyfyt.
xx
The first thing Lorelai hears when she answered her phone was Emily screeching "LORELAI VICTORIA GILMORE!" in her ear.
"Hi, mom," Lorelai dryly responds.
"She got married? And you didn't tell me?"
"Wait, what? Didn't tell you what, mom?" Lorelai replied in confusion.
"Rory! Rory got married!" Emily's voice was bordering on hysterical and was met with a long silence on Lorelai's end. "Lorelai? Lorelai, are you ignoring me? Are you even listening to what I'm saying? LORELAI!"
"Mom," Lorelai calmly replies, "Did you just say Rory, my Rory, got married?"
"Yes, I did. Do I have to repeat myself?" Emily retorts. "How could you let her get married without telling your father and me?"
"Mom! What do you mean Rory got married? She's not dating anyone!" Lorelai yells back. "She hasn't been seriously dating anyone since she and Jeremy broke up! And trust me, she would have told me if she was getting married."
There was a pause on the other end of the line before Emily spoke up again. "Then why am I holding several cards congratulating us on our granddaughter's marriage?" There was a long silence at the end of the phone again before Lorelai finally said something.
"I'm coming over right now to see this for myself. See you in a bit, Mom." She immediately hung up the phone, grabbed her coat, purse, and keys and sped to her parents' home as fast as possible. There was no way that Rory could have hidden such a big thing like getting married from her, and if it was true, oh was her kid (and whoever she married) in trouble. They're so going to have the mother-in-law and grandmother-in-law from hell. Complete with Gilmore-style guilt trips and mocking for the rest of their lives.
As soon as she reached the Gilmore house, she rang the doorbell as irritatingly fast as possible until Emily answered the door.
"Lorelai-" Before she could even say anymore, Lorelai cut her off as she barreled her way into the house.
"Mom. Card. Now." Emily begrudgingly handed one of the cards over to her daughter and as she watched the color drain from Lorelai's shocked face, decided to hold her tongue for once in her life, even though there was a tinge of smugness in learning that for once, she received news before her daughter.
Lorelai stared at the bright congratulatory card in her hands as the text sunk its way into her head. Congratulations Richard and Emily on your granddaughter's marriage! She had to pinch herself to make sure she wasn't hallucinating, but it was true; her baby got married and never told her or Emily about the news until they received cards in the mail. She started to feel a little woozy and started to wobble when Emily caught her by the arm.
"Lorelai?" Emily asked in a rare occurrence of motherly concern as she guided Lorelai to the nearest couch. "Are you all right? You just about fainted right on the floor."
"She's married." Lorelai muttered and tipped her head back on the couch, dropping the card. "She's married and didn't tell me or you or anyone! Maybe Paris or Lane, but even they would have told me something this big!" She then pulled her phone out of her purse and dialed Rory's phone. When she only received the voicemail message, she started to yell into it before hanging up from frustration.
Emily, not knowing quite know how to react, simply offered Lorelai a drink to calm her down, which Lorelai accepted and choked down. "I'm very surprised that you didn't know, Lorelai." She said. "This is very unlike her to not tell anyone about something like this."
"I don't know, Mom. I don't know." Lorelai tiredly replied. "I mean, I know she's an independent and responsible adult now, but she could have at least told me 'Hey Mom, guess what! I'm getting married!' and I could have least had some time to come up with some mother-in-law jokes to scare the poor guy she's marrying. Or even a 'Hey Mom! I've been dating someone!' would have been nice."
She kept ranting until the doorbell rang; Lorelai ran to the door and yanked it open only to see the not-so-innocent faces of her daughter and new son-in-law. So Lorelai did whatever any furious mother-in-law would do: she punched the poor sucker in the face.
"FUCK!" Jess yelped as he brought his hand to his face and stumbled back the same time as Rory and Emily yelled "MOM!" and "Lorelai!" in shock. Rory stepped in between her mother and her husband, with Emily attempting to hold Lorelai back.
"I told you not telling them was a bad idea, Rory!" Jess groaned, clutching his head and wincing at the pain. "Fuck!"
"Sorry!" Rory cried as she tried to keep a furious Lorelai from strangling Jess. "Mom, I can explain!" she yelled. Lorelai paused, glared at her daughter and stomped back into the living room with Emily right behind her. As soon they were out of sight, Rory went over to her husband. "You all right?"
"Yeah, I think I'm fine," Jess groaned, wincing as he kept his hand over the sore spot where Lorelai punched him. "Though I really didn't expect to show up again with another embarrassing injury. At least this time I can blame Lorelai," he joked, prompting Rory to playfully hit him on the shoulder. "Ow, woman! You're not going to kick me too, are you?"
"No, but you might sleeping on the couch tonight if you don't behave, mister," Rory retorts. Jess only smirks back at her, prompting her to giggle a bit and then she kisses him. "Come on, let's get you some ice for that eye. Wow, I didn't know Mom could punch like that."
"Pretty sure she's been wanting to do that to me for the last 15 years, Rory," he replies as they walk into the house, making a beeline for the kitchen for ice before facing down the wrath of Lorelai and Emily Gilmore.
"And you have such an angelic face," Rory replies as she makes a cold pack and hands it to him to place over his swelling bruise and they cautiously walk into the formal living room where Lorelai and the grandparents were waiting and sat down on the couch across from them.
"So. Explain." Lorelai glared. Rory took a deep breath and began to recall the events which led up to her and Jess getting married and keeping it secret until now. Jess nodded along as he shifted the cold pack on his face, preferring to let Rory talk since she was better at the whole talking thing and it'll save him the trouble of getting maimed; he might just end up having more bruises than broken bones after this.
A few years ago, they had bumped into each other at a fine arts trade show in New York; he was there as an art dealer for Truncheon and she was covering the show for one of the weekly alternative publications. They had started talking and catching up with an agreement to keep things strictly friendly; despite the fact that they haven't seen or spoken to each other for years, it still felt too soon to open up that sore space between them.
As she went on, Rory's speech began to rev up until Jess nudged her with his good arm. "Slow down, you're turning blue."
"Right!" Rory caught herself and resumed at a more regular pace as she went back to her story. She and Jess had speaking to each other on a regular basis and even though they had taken to seeing other people, their friendship lasted much longer than any of their relationships. Until that one night he showed up on her doorstep.
"Jess?" Rory greeted him in confusion when she opened the door.
"Rory." He replied. "You free?"
"Uh..yeah! Yeah. Come on in," She stammered and gestured for him to come in. "So."
"So."
"Um..." Rory fidgeted as Jess looked away from her. "What are you doing here?" It really is like him to appear at the most random times in her life and she supposed that she'll never be used to that, even though he's been doing that to her since they were teenagers.
"Do you want to try again?" He asked. Rory blinked at his question and bit her lip as she thought about it. There was so much history between them and despite the fact that she should know better than to revisit the past; Jess simply wasn't that kind of guy to be left in her past, unlike her other exes. He's also the only guy in her life that she still feels strongly about and has a tinge of regret over their past.
And now there's the fact he's still around and asking her to give them another shot at happiness; Rory's taking it as a sign from the cosmos that this man standing in front her, the boy that she still loved since she was 17, is The One. "Rory?"
Rory blinks again and her thoughts zoom back into reality; Jess is looking at her with an unreadable expression on his face and he's biting his lip. She breathes deeply and looks back into his eyes. "Yeah, let's try again." She smiles as she closes the space between them and they kiss, feeling like perfection, real happiness, true love at last.
When they broke apart, Jess smirked and bumped their foreheads together. "Then will you marry me, Lorelai Leigh Gilmore?" As the words "marry me" sunk into her brain, her eyes widened in shock. Marriage. He wanted to marry her, be with her, forever. They weren't ready all those years ago and now, it felt so right that she accepted by attacking his lips again, muttering a "yes" along the way. They've waited this long to finally be together, they might as get it over with and take the leap.
Rory had been thinking about immediately calling Lorelai with the news, but since they made the decision so fast, she opted to hold off telling her mother until after they got married.
"You sure about that, Ror?" Jess had asked her as they drove to the Manhattan courthouse to apply for their marriage license. "Because correct me if I'm wrong, but Lorelai and your grandparents will kill us if you don't tell them. Not to mention Luke, your dad, and everyone else in our lives."
"I'm sure," Rory replied. "Because for once in my life, I want to be selfish and make a big life decision without anyone else's input. I want to have something that's just the two of us." She squeezed his hand as they walked into the courthouse.
Lorelai gaped at her squirming daughter. "So you two just decided to get married and not tell us until the fact?"
Rory fidgeted. "I didn't want any second thoughts or convincing from anyone else. We both decided that to just go for it." Jess had retreated to the kitchen to refill his cold pack with Richard following shortly behind him; everyone could clearly tell that he wanted to grill Jess separately on their actions. "And if I told you and Grandma, it would been blown out of proportion and completely not the way we wanted it go."
Emily looked offended. "Lorelai Leigh Gilmore! I would not have blown this whole matter out of proportion if you had simply notified your mother or me that you were getting married!" She lowers her voice and adds, "And to him? He broke your wrist and showed up here with a black eye and an attitude!"
"Yes, grandma; that's Jess," Rory sighed. "And that was a long time ago, Grandma. He never meant any of that."
Emily just shook her head and made herself another drink. "I absolutely forbid this union; I want you to get an annulment." Her granddaughter, married to someone that didn't even have a respectable family background or even a respectable job. It's an indignity to her status that Rory would marry someone so below her. Emily didn't mind Jeremy or Alex after Rory had refused to get back with Logan Huntzberger, at least they had came from respectable families and had decent jobs to support Rory in the future, she suspected that Jess barely holds onto his current job.
Rory fidgeted some more. "Um...I don't think so, Grandma. We've been married for seven months now."
Emily and Lorelai's voices rose in unison. "WHAT."
"I can explain!" Rory threw up her hands in defense. And since Jess was still stuck in the kitchen being grilled by her grandfather, she'd have to wing this part of the explanation by herself.
With the license approved by the State of New York and a call to Paris (and therefore Doyle as well) and Chris (and Matt because Chris is lousy with directions) to take a day trip off and drag their asses to New York, Jess and Rory were married in a Manhattan chapel by a minister who clearly had been a hippie in his younger days with the way he had greeted and blessed their union.
Paris had bitched about having to take a break from the hospital, but that was because she had been working night shifts for a week straight due to being short-staffed; Doyle had actually hugged Rory for giving them a break when they arrived at the chapel. Chris and Matt had managed to arrive on time, despite the fact that they missed a stop and had to drive for 15 more miles before managing to find the church.
Just before the minister appeared to conduct the small and intimate ceremony, Jess leaned over to whisper, "Why didn't you ask Lane to come?"
"As much as I love Lane and really want her here, she still lives in Stars Hollow. Which means somehow Zach will find out, which means Mrs. Kim and everyone else will find out," She whispered back. "It defeats the whole purpose of 'just us', but I know Paris and the guys will keep quiet. And we need witnesses." Jess only nodded as Rory's odd logic sunk in and the minister appeared to conduct the ceremony.
"We are gathered here today..."
They celebrated with dinner and drinks at a quiet upscale restaurant and plenty of good-humored ribbing from their friends; Paris and Rory ganged up on Jess over their usual topics of books and food while Doyle, Chris, and Matt offered each other color commentary over their drinks, much to Jess's annoyance.
After saying good night to their friends and wishing them luck on the drive home, Rory and Jess walked along Central Park, admiring the nightly scenery around them as their first night as newlyweds. "So..." Jess hedged as he draped his arm over her shoulder, "How are we going to break the news to Lorelai and everyone else that you're officially off the market?"
Rory looked over at their bare fingers and let out a deep breath. "I don't want to tell her yet."
"Why not?"
"It doesn't feel real enough to tell her. She wouldn't believe me even though she and Dad did the surprise marriage thing and look how that turned out, I mean all the things that she and Dad went through and then her and Luke's whole thing and the fact that they haven't gotten married and..." She started to ramble again until Jess gently nudged her to slow down.
Rory took a deep breath and added, "I don't want to jeopardize this, Jess. After everything that's happened to us since we were teenagers and all the hell that we've put each other through and finally, finally being able to marry you, I just don't want to told that it's a mistake and it's not a mistake."
He nodded, only understanding the last point she was trying to make. "Okay. I mean, I don't think it's a good idea to keep this from everyone, but okay, I won't tell if you won't tell."
"Thank you, thank you, thank you," Rory leaned in closer to her husband (her husband!) and wrapped her arms around his torso as they walked. She added, "I mean, I do want Mom and Grandma and Grandpa and Luke and Dad and everyone else to know eventually, but not now, you know? I want to give married life a shot," She held her bare fingers up and wiggled them for emphasis, "And get our rings, too."
"Okay, we'll get the rings tomorrow then," Jess laughs as he kisses his wife (wife!) on the cheek. "So that it's legit and all, Mrs. Mariano."
"I like the sound of that, Mr. Mariano. Or is it Mr. Gilmore?" She giggles as Jess scrunches his face at the thought of being called Mr. Gilmore.
"Hey now," Jess mock scowls at her. "Your new last name sounds better. Or do you want to go the hyphenated route, Mrs. Gilmore-Mariano?"
Rory perks up at the new name. "Ooh, that sounds good. Like a real reporter's name," She entwines their fingers together as they leave the park and head for nearest open ice cream shop. "Or Lorelai Leigh Mariano. That sounds pretty snappy." They throw about more names as their night closes with ice cream in cones and a romantic hotel suite.
As she let the facts sink in and process in her brain, Lorelai slumps into the couch and rubs her temple. Uncharacteristically, Emily says nothing but she sets her drink down on the coffee table and leaves the room.
Rory fidgets a bit and gets up to go to the kitchen to check that her grandfather hasn't killed her husband. Luckily for her, Jess is indeed still alive and actually having a real conversation with Richard. "Oh thank god. You're not dead!" She breathes with relief at the sight of her husband and grandfather actually having friendly conversation over drinks.
"Me too, Rory. Me too," Jess replied with a smirk. He was nursing a glass of water and picking at a snack plate that was sitting on the counter; Richard was doing the same but with a glass of brandy instead.
"Ah, Rory," Richard greeted her. "Fine timing you have; Jess and I were just discussing the newest book releases on the market, he has excellent taste."
Rory beams. "He reads as much as I do, Grandpa. It's kind of how we met." Jess pointedly looks away from her, apparently finding a ceiling corner much more interesting than the conversation between his wife and grandfather-in-law. Rory simply rolls her eyes as she reaches for a canape.
"I see," Richard replies as he clasps a hand on Rory's shoulder. "Well, although I certainly don't approve of how you kept this a secret from your mother and us, I do think that you two are certainly well-matched. Jess here is a fine young man and if he's capable of keeping up with my granddaughter, I don't see why I should oppose it. Your grandmother might need more convincing, but I think she'll come around."
"Thanks, Grandpa. It means a lot of me and Jess that you're okay with it," Rory blushed and then reaches over to smack Jess in the shoulder. "Isn't that right, Jess?"
He turns his attention back to them and puts on his best "I'm a good boy, seriously" face. "Huh? Oh, yeah!" He gives Rory a thumbs up and she rolls her eyes again, so he smirks and turns his attention back to the snack plate.
Richard raised an eyebrow to their interactions, but turned his attention back to Rory. "Perhaps we should get back to your mother and grandmother, they'll be waiting for us. Come along, then." He walked out of the kitchen and back towards the living room.
"You heard him, let's go," Rory nudged Jess in the side. "Back to facing Mom and Grandma. Hopefully Grandpa can convince them that it's okay now. And your bruise doesn't look as bad now."
He snorted as his free hand laced their fingers together. "Now I just gotta get maimed by Luke and your dad and I'll have the whole collection."
"Jess!" Rory mockingly chided him.
"What can I say? I'm an optimist."
"And that's why I love you anyway." She kisses him as they leave the kitchen and walk back into the living room and they take a seat back on the empty couch.
Lorelai's expression remained unreadable and Emily had returned to take her place on the other couch next to Richard. The silence in the room is deafening until Lorelai decides to speak up.
"So..." She began with a deep breath. "I've done some thinking and I'm really happy for you and Jess, sweets. Really! I just wish that you guys could have told me sooner and I could have come up with some really good son-in-law jokes and threw a killer party, you know."
Rory coughs a bit. "While Jess and I really appreciate the thought of a party, Mom, we're kinda...partied out. All those functions for work that we've been going to? Really killed any desire for parties for a long time. A really long time. We just really want to relax and lay low."
"Heathens!" Lorelai gasps. "You're turning down a chance for Mommy to throw a 'Congratulations, my kid got married!' party?" She glares at Jess. "Did you put her up to that?"
"Yes," he deadpans. "Because we agreed to shoot down any idea of a party because we'd rather spend the night at home organizing our books and music collections. She also a DVD collection to rival yours." Rory leans her head on his shoulder in an attempt to hide a smirk.
Lorelai stares at them and says to no one in particular as she slumps back on the couch, "I don't even know if he was actually being serious or being a smartass. Maybe both; hard to tell with him."
Emily, who had been uncharacteristically silent, finally spoke up. "Well, if you don't want a party, at least be courteous enough to stay for dinner then if you have no other plans." Rory and Jess quickly agreed since they might as well get the Emily Gilmore treatment over with before going back to their semblance of a normal life.
Despite Richard and Lorelai's attempts to deflect the attention, Rory and Jess received a thorough Emily Gilmore treatment throughout dinner. Once they had gotten into their car, Jess slumped forward and let his head hit the steering wheel while Rory slumped back in her seat and both let out a deep breath.
"Holy shit, Ror," Jess said after a silence. "I knew Emily was intense, but Jesus Christ, I thought she was really going to kill me back there. Me showing up with a black eye was a fucking walk in the park compared to tonight."
"I know," She replied. "I mean, I knew she'd be mad about us not telling anyone, but wow, that was really something I hope to never see again." Jess only made a noise of agreement as he started up the car and turned on the stereo and the eccentric warblings of Tom Waits filled their car as they drove to Stars Hollow to stay the night instead of driving back to New York. Lorelai had insisted after dinner that they stay overnight at the Crap Shack since it was getting late and they were just subjected to the Emily Gilmore treatment.
"You two were just Emily Gilmore'd and you guys want to drive back to New York?" Lorelai had asked in disbelief. "Oh no you're not. You two need to come back to the Crap Shack and detox. Neither of you deserved that from her." She hugs Rory and awkwardly pats Jess on the shoulder before getting into her Jeep. "I'll see you guys back at the house. Gotta tell Luke we have company."
Rory nods and then asks, "Mom, can you let us tell Luke? Otherwise he'll think you're just joking again."
"No he won't!" Lorelai exclaims. "I'm always serious around him."
"Says the woman who bought a birdcage at a yard sale, stuffed it with shoes and put it in the diner to annoy him," Jess smirks and when Lorelai glared at him, he simply shrugged. "Rory told me."
She turned to Rory. "Is it still too late to get an annulment on the grounds that he annoys the mother-in-law?"
"I'm afraid so, Mom. He's with me for life." Rory shrugs and gives her mother her most innocent smile.
Lorelai pouts and starts her Jeep. "Fine, I'll let you two tell Luke. But can I at least tell your dad?"
"No, I want to tell Dad," Rory replies. "Remember, he's still screening your phone calls from the last time. You can tell Patty or Babette in the morning."
"Fine, ruin my fun," Lorelai pouts before driving off. "I'll see you later then."
When they entered into the Crap Shack, Paul Anka trotted out to greet them before darting away to the kitchen. They followed the dog and found both Luke and Lorelai sitting at the kitchen table waiting for them.
"Luke. Lorelai." Jess greeted them as he and Rory entered the kitchen and Rory sat down and he remained standing.
"Jess. Rory." Luke grunted. "Anything you two want to tell me tonight? From what I hear from Lorelai, it's big news."
Jess and Rory give each other a look as Jess scratches the back of his head. "Yeah," he replies. "Rory and I got married a couple months ago."
Luke says nothing for a while and then speaks up. "And you didn't tell us why?" Jess shrugs and looks at Rory.
"We weren't ready to tell anyone yet. Then we bumped into Logan and his wife during our trip to Vermont and that's why we're telling you now because Grandma and Grandpa started getting cards from their friends," Rory fills in. Luke takes a moment to process the shortened version of what Lorelai and the elder Gilmores have learned before saying something.
The first words out of his mouth were, "Married. Huh." He pauses to collect his thoughts again before speaking up. "You guys want some coffee?"
"Please."
"Oh god, yes." Jess slumps into the chair next to Rory and rubs the bridge of his nose. "I didn't even get to drink tonight."
"Oooh, me too Luke!"
Luke glares at Lorelai. "You've had enough, you crazy. You've drank no less than 4 cups the moment you got back from your parents' place."
"But it's my parents, Luke! They just got the Emily Gilmore treatment and even my dad helped me try to divert the attention!" Lorelai exclaimed. "I need more coffee! Pleeeeeeeeeease, long-term-partner of mine? One more cup?" Luke rolls his eyes, but makes the coffee anyways.
Rory and Jess smirk at each other as they watch Luke and Lorelai bicker over coffee again; she leans over and places her head on his shoulder and squeezes his hand. He squeezes back and all is okay with the world again.