I wasn't always like this.
I wasn't always crying every 10 minutes. I wasn't always a horrid bitch, but that was before. If you ask, no one will remember the Cho Chang from first year. I like it that way. Back in first year, I was the Hermione Granger of my year; quiet, studious, shy, and friendless. The only difference was while she always had her hand up first, and was always helping people while I sat in the back of the class alone, not speaking unless called upon. I was just like her, except less talkative. I was fed up with it, so that's when I changed.
In second year, I came back new-and-improved. I was less involved in my studies, talked to people, and made friends. My life improved every second. It came so that people wanted to talk to Cho Chang. I was popular now, and I was thrilled.
In third year, I made it onto the Quidditch team as Seeker. That's where I met him. Cedric Diggory. I was taken from him the moment I saw him, but he won't ever know that. I met Harry that year, too; saw him alone, isolated. People thought he was the heir of Slytherin; poor kid. I felt bad for him at the time, but I wasn't going to go reaching out to him. My friends would turn on me. I was so terrified of ending up that lonely little girl again.
In fourth year, Cedric and I became friends. The most pivotal part in our relationship was the friendship we previously shared. When I was waiting to see how Harry was after he fell (I felt very protective of him) he kept me company.
When I had a bad day, he cheered me up. He was the best friend anyone could ask for. I always wanted more, but I would NEVER tell him that.
In fifth year, the Triwizard Tournament took place. Maybe it was the feeling that he could die at any moment, but Cedric told me he loved me. We started dating…and it was wonderful. We were so close, almost inseparable.
Then there was the Third Task…it hurts just to think about. Seeing his lifeless body…it left a scar years of therapy wouldn't be able to remove. Everyone saw else saw one of the Hogwarts champions. I saw my best friend.
Now it's 6th year. I'm nearly always crying with the memories of Cedric that bombard me daily, I'm confused over how I feel about Harry, and I've become a bitch. The meanness is unintentional, it's just if I'm not mean sometimes, and I lose my friends. I'm afraid to be alone, afraid to become the Cho from first year again.
I scribbled my name on the Dumbledore's Army signup sheet as I left the Hog's Head. Maybe now I can show people who I am, not who I appear to be. I'm not a bitchy cow you should avoid like the Plague; I'm just a broken girl in need of fixing.