Me : omfg . i cried while writing this . i-i /sobs
Ritsu : Oh crap …
Me : THE NOSTALGIA FEELS ! /SOBS EVEN MORE
Ritsu : She doesn't own Sekai Ichi Hatsukoi … o_o;;
Me : A-also this scene topic came form The Hunger Games . From Catching Fire . I just finished the series . /sob
My Nightmares
Saga&Oda
Shouting.
It echoed in the house. The halls, the empty rooms, especially my room. More shouting. Its getting louder. Nasty words shot back at each other. To think that they were once a couple. They actually decided to get married to each other. They were happy. /italic/ What happened to that? What happened to my parents?
Crash.
Heh, what now? Another vase broken? Another one I have to clean up later when you've both had enough and leave. Forgetting me. Not caring. Just leaving. You would think that most 12 year olds, most kids my age would be scared. Frightened? Sad? Not me, not anymore. Yet, I always end up sitting behind the closed door of the living room. Watching their silhouettes underneath the crack in the door. The sound of shoes stomping out the door. Hearing things flying across the room. And worst of all. The words. They are said with so much hate.
"You don't do anything for this family!"
"What? If it weren't for me there wouldn't be food on the table!"
Though this sight is not a pleasant one to see or hear. I go down the stairs from my room. The cold tiles underneath my feet, the smooth tiles letting me come down to listen with out making a sound. I sit by the door. Listening to their ill fated wars. Every other day or so, some times even everyday. Why? Why do I go down to listen? Just listening to the horrible things they say. It's the closet thing I can get to being with my family. The time when were all together. Though they don't know my presence. And the fact that they are fighting. There are nights when I can feel hot tears flowing down my cheeks. It doesn't feel like my face is emitting emotion, the tears are just coming down. I never bothered to wipe them, knowing this will happen again soon.
"Saga"
Someones calling me.
"Sempai"
Huh? Who is that?
"Saga-sempai!"
Gentle hands were shaking my sides. I turn my head to the left to see someone. He's wearing a worried expression. His green eyes showed much concern. Ritsu… I look around to see that its still pretty late at night. I can see starts through my window. Oh yeah, he slept over since its the weekend. Well, he sleeps over everyday or so now.
"Y-You were moving around a lot and it woke me. Then you started to cry… Are you okay?" He asks quietly, but I could hear the concern in his voice.
Cry? I reach up my hands to touch my face. He was right. There were tears. I wonder why I have to dream about my parents of all things. Why? Why must they hurt me even in my dreams? Then, I realized I haven't even answered Ritsu.
"Oh, its nothing. Just a nightmare." I say calmly. To ensure him, I turn to face him and bring him close to me. Then, a thought occurred to me. If he wakes me up because he thinks I'm having a nightmare, why won't he wake me up if he has one. I should probably tell him that he can.
"Hey, if you have a nightmare you can wake me up."
"There's no need for that," He says. His voice hushed into a whisper.
"Why?"
"My nightmares are usually about not having you by my side anymore. But once I wake up and see that you're here next to me I'm fine…" He finishes and snuggles in closer to me.
For some reason that made me really happy. Ever since he came into my life, I've been happy. I don't want to lose him. I held him closer and held him tighter. Holding him as if he would disappear one day, without a word. Once I feel his even breaths on my chest, I kiss his head and let myself drift off to sleep.
Calm down. Calm down. It was just a dream. Why won't my heart race go down. Damn it. I sat up in my bed. I dropped my face into my hands. Why. Why did I have to dream about him? It just makes the situation worse. I don't want to accept that he's not here... He can't be gone...
Ritsu.
My Ritsu.
I sighed and laid down on my bed again. It feels so vacant without him here. His body warmth gone. I looked to the side Of my bed That Ritsu always slept on. I closed my eyes for a moment. Hoping that when I opens them he would be there like he always had been.
I opened my eyes again.
"Saga-sempai."
He smiled at me, his green eyes sparkling in the dark. He was laying there, like he always had. Was it real? Am I dreaming? I reached out my hand to caress his cheek, wanting to make sure he was real, but as soon as I touched him he disappeared. My mind playing cruel tricks on me.
I'm crying. I could tell. My face became humid and sticky from tears that wouldn't stop flowing. Like an endless river or sadness. Am I going to have more dreams like this? Dreams that bring back horrible memories. Nightmares. More like nightmares. Would they haunt me forever? Will I go through this all alone?
How am I supposed to deal with these nightmares without you?
Me : T . T For the beginning part with Saga's point of view , that was just a spring of the moment . I wrote it a long time ago .
Takano : Oh . Wow . Uh okay .
Ritsu : ... Um .
Me : I hope you enjoyed it . I don't if it moved your hearts or something but I cried thinking about it . ;-;
Also do you want me to write a 2nd chapter ? Think of it as a bonus Ritsu's point of view .
Thanks for reading .
Ja ne ~
Love , Ritsu
