We were always so lucky. First we got a one in a million mutation that started gave us life and consciousness. Then we got our father. A ninja master to defend us and teach us how to defend ourselves from the dangers of the world. Then we got each other. We got love and support as brothers and as lovers. I got Raphael's fiery passion and Donatello and Michelangelo got each other. We stumbled into it like everything else Lady Luck handed to us.
Our luck was gone now. It abandoned us when we needed it most. An ambush. Usually we were prepared, we survived because of our fighting skill too after all. But Mikey's and Donnie's weapons had been broken the day before. Our steel had always been stronger. And Raph, well he'd been sick for weeks. That's why we were went out in the first place. He was finally getting better and wanted to feel the fresh air. I should've insisted we didn't go out. He always knew what strings to pull. Even so I knew we shouldn't have left without our full strength.
Donnie was the first of us to go. I watched Michelangelo scream his name. Saw all the happiness drain out of his eyes instantaneously. The smile that usually graced his face was smashed. It was replaced by rage and gritted teeth. He fought like a wild, taking out whole groups of enemies at a time, yet they didn't stop for a minute and his anger made him reckless. We could only cover the blows so many times before we weren't fast enough. The dying embers that were a usually brightly burning Michelangelo were snuffed out altogether. He had managed to get back to his love. Their bodies and blood tangled together. They would've looked peaceful if not for all the red.
Eventually Raph and I dropped too. We were too damaged and tired to move now. Our adversaries left us alone. Either assuming we were dead or realizing that we would be soon. We were both leaned against the edge of a rooftop. The winds whipped the tails of our masks around, but it didn't do much to cover up our heavy desperate breaths.
"Raphael?"
"Yeah?"
"Can you get closer?" I didn't do a very good job of masking my pain, but neither did he.
"I think so." He began lifting his body his body with one arm and hurling it toward me. I followed suit. Flopping toward him like a fish out of water. We halted and turned, facing each other. We didn't touch, choosing to simply stare instead. The moonlight told me his irises were still as brilliant gold as ever. Or one of them was. The other was replaced by crimson. We achingly stretched out our arms and wrapped our fingers together. They would never fit in a human hand, but were perfect for another mutant turtle.
"Hey Leo?"
"Yeah?"
"M'sorry."
"What for?" We hadn't argued in weeks. What did he have to apologize for?
"For… everything I guess? I'm always…" He was interrupted by a fit of wet horrible coughing. "A-always kinda an ass, y'know? So, sorry for all da shit I put you through over da years."
"I forgive you." The response sounded too quick. "I really mean it. I completely forgive you."
"T-that's good ta hear." He sighed like he did when he let go of one of his bigger weights while bench pressing. Then there was silence for a bit. I would've asked if to see if he was still with me if I couldn't see him heaving ragged breaths in front of me. Then he chuckled. I gave a confused look. "Sorry about that just thought of the lullaby sensei used to sing us. Y'know da one about da alligator."
I remembered the one. It was Master Splinter's own creation. The part Raph was talking about were in my mind but the song was really about our father protecting us. It was also warning, as most of what he said to us was, to not venture out too far into the sewers. "I remember, but why is that funny?"
"I always hated the way he sung it. To raspy I guess. But I remember how we learned the words and eventually started singing it ourselves. Donnie sounded good and Mikey wasn't bad, but wow did it sound good coming from ya Leo. Even when I was kid I recognized how amazing ya were. Never told ya that. So now I'm telling ya. But that's kinda a silly death confession ya know? Like why tell ya that?"
"Maybe you want me to sing it?"
"Please?"
I shuddered. I think that was the first time I'd heard him say that without being forced to, without the snarky attitude he usually had. I opened my mouth was and took a shuddering breath when he stopped me. "Wait!" I had to wait for him to stop coughing again.
"Yeah?"
"I-I just thought of something else. The last time I kissed ya was before we were ambushed."
"Hm yeah… that's right."
"Well were running out of time. Maybe we should kiss instead of you singing. I… I don't know." He began to hyperventilate.
"Raph. Raph calm down. Breathe. Breathe." He slow each precious exhalation until he was calm again.
"Sorry."
"It's fine. Just don't go yet okay? We can do both. Just hold on a bit longer and we can do both."
His head barely bobbed up and down. He moved closer and I inched my head forward until out mouths slid together. We opened up for each other and shared tongues, saliva, and the coppery taste of blood. We pulled away slowly, not wanting our last kiss to end. We smiled and proclaimed out love for one another. Then we slid back into our previous positions.
"Just close your eyes and listen to my voice." I picked up the crawling cadence of the lullaby. The moon pierced out beloved shadows as I sang my last brother to sleep.