Just a one shot of Draco trying to deal with loneliness when Harry isn't around.

This was written for Hogwarts July event with a prompt: being lonely during summer, and for Major and Minor Arcana class with prompts: emotional slytherin, rain, crying.

Any kind of feedback is welcome!

I do not own Harry Potter

Enjoy

They had exactly hundred and seventy nine books in the bookshelf. All now in a alphabetical order by the author. And if there were multiple books from the same author they were also in alphabetical order by the title. First book was Persuasion by Jane Austen and the last was a play called Our country's good and it was written by Timberlake Wertenbaker. Draco had never read either of them.

They also had twelve pillows, sixteen pairs of shoes, ten of them Draco's and the rest Harry's. They had twenty seven water glasses and twenty five mugs. They had eleven forks and twelve knives. One of the forks must have gone missing. There was four plants in the living room and two in the kitchen. And all the little bottles in the bathroom were lined up from the smallest to the biggest.

Everything was counted for and organized in some way.

Draco was lying on the sofa and staring at the ceiling. It was painted light gray and it had fifty two wooden boards and thirty one of those little branch holes to be seen. Draco was slowly but surely going crazy. Harry had been out on a mission for almost a week and Draco was alone. He hated being alone, so he came up with other things to do. This time it was counting and arranging things. Usually he would clean the apartment from floor to roof but he had already done that the first day.

This had not been the plan for his summer holidays. They were supposed to spend it together, maybe go to the beach or somewhere warm. But instead Draco was sitting home alone, listening to the rain for the sixth day in a row. Surely this was only the first week of his holidays and there was heaps left but still. He was sure he couldn't take it anymore. He shifted and buried his face against the sofa trying to hold back his tears. He hated being alone. So much.

Draco used to be okay with being alone. In fact he could remember the time he enjoyed being alone. But then he got used to being with Harry, doing things together, living together. And now every time Harry was somewhere for a longer time period Draco got really anxious. He missed being able go curl next to Harry when they were watching telly or falling asleep next to him. Now all he had was a cold bed and no idea how to use the damn telly.

Draco was considering on contacting someone. He knew he could send an owl or fire call to Blaise. They would go and have drinks and chat about something. Or he could do same with Ron. Funny enough they got along now. At first they had tried for Harry's sake but slowly it had turned into real friendship. But much rather he wanted to call Harry and ask him to come home. Harry would probably come home, he did love Draco, right.

The thought made Draco to sit up. What if Harry didn't care about him anymore. He had had loads of long missions and late nights at work. Maybe he was getting tired of Draco. Maybe he was just trying to ease the process of leaving Draco by being away a lot.

It made Draco feel even lonelier. What if Harry would just come home one day and tell that he wanted to break up. What would Draco do then. He leaned back to the sofa and took a deep breath.

There was one big lamp in the living room roof. One standing in the corner. Draco closed his eyes picturing their bedroom. They had two nightstand lamps, one in the walk in closet and one big one in the roof of the bedroom. Only one lamp in the bathroom and two in the kitchen. Draco could feel tears running down his cheeks as he tried even harder to distract himself from everything. Malfoys didn't cry.

But he was crying. Draco tried to think of all the paintings and photos they had on the walls but he couldn't. It wasn't helping. So he gave in.

"I hate you!" He almost yelled.

"I fucking..." there was a hiccup "...Hate you..." more sobbing "...for doing this to..." another hiccup "...me." Draco felt miserable. He curled up on a small ball and wrapped his arms around his legs. "I hate you. I hate you. I hate you" he mumbled between sobs.

"No you don't" Draco felt the sofa move as Harry sat down next to him.

"I do, and you have nothing to say" He answered still slightly sobbing but trying to wipe his eyes clean. They were probably totally red and all puffed up but he didn't care. He sat up and dragged himself as far away from Harry as he could.

"I see you have cleaned up here, more than once" Harry said amusement in his voice. He was looking at Draco who just gave him an angry look.

"I guess you missed me" He added after a while and giving Draco a knowing look.

"No" was all Draco was able to say without sounding desperate. He wanted to sound like everything was okay. Like he didn't need Harry. Like he hadn't been incredibly lonely during the time Harry had been away. Like he wasn't afraid that Harry had grown tired of him and wanted to leave again, but this time for good.

Harry got up from where he was sitting making Draco's heart skip a beat or two. His mind raced faster than light with all kinds of horrific pictures of what was going to happen. But Harry just closed the gap between them and sat right next to Draco. He wrapped his hands around his obviously anxious husband. Draco relaxed and leaned in. He had missed this so much. Who cared if it was very non Malfoy behavior, I wasn't like he was a Malfoy anymore. He was a Malfoy-Potter and he was allowed to cry and enjoy being held. Malfoy-Potters were allowed to like all those mushy sweet things Malfoys despised.

"Maybe a teeny weeny bit" He mumbled against Harry's shirt making him smile.

"I take it that you don't really hate me, do you" Harry answered trying to hold his laughter inside. This wasn't the first time he had been on a long auror mission and found incredibly miserable Draco when he came back.

"I guess not" was the muffled answer he got. Harry pressed a small kiss on the white hair and tightened his hold on Draco.

"I love you too" Harry said smiling.