AN: Please go easy on me cause this is the first fic...i hope you like it. I am working on more chapters.

Thanks to VickieL for the "bata" it was very helpful. Please enjoy and review...if you like it I'll continue.

"Where's John?" I asked looking around the Blackbird but not seeing him.

Logan called out "Pyro, where the hell is he?"

And from the back of the plane, I heard "I'm here."

I honestly breathed a sigh of relief; I was hoping that he would stay. I looked back finally seeing him and gave him a small smile; he just gave me that famous Pyro smirk and started flicking his lighter.

Storm and Scott where trying to get the plane started but weren't having much luck. I watched as Jean limped to the exit and Scott ran after her but she shut the door on him, I got a sick feeling in my stomach and feared for the worst.

Suddenly all the lights and controls turned on and the plane began to lift off the ground and then the professor started talking on Jean's behalf. I watched as Scott fell into Logan arms and everyone began to cry and Kurt said a short prayer.

I felt the tears begin to form in my eyes. Once the professor said that she was gone, I lost it, the tears began to fall down my checks and they burned like tiny ribbons of fire falling down my face.

I couldn't believe that she was gone, she couldn't be gone. I had been at the school for a little over a year now and in that time Jean gone from being my powers teacher to being the one person I confided in.

We had twice weekly one on one powers training sessions and afterwards she would take me out to the mall and we would talk about girl stuff.

She made me see Scott and the Professor and even Logan in a different light. I would talk to her about my "relationship" with Bobby and my growing crush on John and she would tell me stories about her and Scott and her life before she came to the mansion. Jean was like the sister I never had. I sat there unable to believe that she was really gone.

I looked over at Bobby but he didn't ever look at me, he had been pulling away for the last few weeks, I saw him freeze the fountain and take Kitty skating and I defiantly saw him kiss her…and more than just once. I was fine with the fact that Bobby would rather be with little Ms. prefect than me.

I sat there wiping the tears off of my cheeks. I felt something growing in me, it was like a flame not yet a fire, and it felt like something inside of my head was trying to get out, trying to get my attention.

I looked back at Pyro he just reached out his hands and mouthed the words "come here" I couldn't resist such an invitation.

From the moment I arrived at the mansion it seemed to be a game between Bobby and John; a game to see who could get my attention; who could put on the biggest display and in the end who could get the girl and it always seemed to everyone that Bobby had won but honestly he hadn't.

Everyone treated Bobby like her was a saint for being willing to give up the boyfriend/girlfriend affection so he could give the "untouchable girl" some hope but I knew the truth Bobby was afraid of me, yes he kissed me at his parents place and he gave me a few quick touches but when I absorbed fear before anything and it hurt me to think of it.

Then I remembered the night of our "camping trip' I was sitting by the fire talking to John, he told me that Bobby was good enough for me and that I could do better.

I asked him if he could do better and he just gave me that smart-ass smirk, leaned over and gave me the most passionate kiss I'd ever had in my whole life, it must have lasted for two minutes…when I pulled away my head was filled with his memories and thoughts but oddly no drain of power.

He tasted amazing like smoke, heat, and menthol. I pushed him away and wanted to yell at him but didn't want to wake anyone.

"Are you crazy Pyro? Do you have some kind of death wish?" I asked him with gritted teeth.

He just grabbed my hand, looked me dead in the eyes, and said, "I don't fear you or your powers Rogue and yes I am better. And it St. John." I looked at him and noticed that he was still holding my hand.

"Marie…Anna Marie." I don't know what possessed me to tell him that but it just felt right. I was amazed when he smiled at me…not his usual smirk but a real smile. I pulled my hand away and said, "Don't stay out all night…you'll freeze."

He just laughed. But it was earlier that day that stuck into my mind the hardest.

We were at Bobby's parents and his little brother had called the cops and they had the place surrounded. John warned them that he was the most dangerous mutant and then he started shooting fire balls at the cops, I had to stop him so I removed my gloves and grabbed his ankle. I know that I held on way to long but I had to stop all the flames.

I know that he wasn't really trying to hurt the cops he was just trying to protect me from them, they had shot Logan and he wasn't worried cause he knew Logan's healing factor would take care of that but I didn't have one and John didn't care if he died he had to protect me from the humans.

I got a flood of his emotions, a large part of John was now a part of me, he was now the loudest voice in my mind, and at that moment, his thoughts drowned everything out. I saw his childhood cold and lonely and unloving, he fought to survive on the streets until the Professor took him in, there was so much hurt, so much pain, anger and rage and…and oh god love. John Allerdyce was in love with me, he wanted me, and he truly didn't fear me.

I gave him a warm smile, unbuckled my seatbelt, walked to the back of the plane, and sat down next to him.

He wrapped an around me and I rested my head on his shoulder. I felt his warmth and I just broke down and couldn't stop the tears from falling.

"It's ok Anna, I'm here…I'll protect you."

I closed my eyes and breathed deeply; comforted by the smell that was uniquely John's.

I felt his hand on my face as he slowly wiped away my tears. He kissed the top of my head and whispered, "You're safe with me babe."

I somehow managed to find my voice, "I know…I just can't be…she can't …she's really gone…it's not fair."

I looked up at him and all I saw in his brilliant cobalt eyes was pain, hurt, concern, and…love. I saw a tear roll down his cheek he gave me a warm smile and I felt the butterflies grow in my stomach, he rested a hand on my check and I covered it with my own.

Once again, I didn't feel a drain I just felt a warm heat and that strange feel started to stir again the fire that was trying to get out. I forgot for a moment about the current tragedy and all I could think about was him, his hand slipped to my chin and he lifted my face I looked at him and whispered, "I'm yours if you still want me."

He gave me that smile and kissed me on the forehead and with that kiss I knew…I now belonged to St. John Allerdyce.

I knew that I was safe and loved. I knew that I would get past the pain of Jean's death…but I still feared whatever it was that was building inside of me.

Whatever it was, it was hungry and it wanted release. I rested my head back on John's chest and he wrapped his arms around me. As I fell asleep, a name fell off of my lips…Phoenix.