Disclaimer : I own nothing of this except the narration. The characters and their universe all belong to their owners. I am not making money with this – I mean, come on it'd be ridiculous, right? … Please don't sue me.

Rating : A very light T.

Blahblah: This oneshot is an established relationship kind of story. Not entirely compliant with the books even though not much is said about those seven years. Certainly NOT compliant with the epilogue, either…

Oxytocin is the hormone making you all giddy and drowsily happy when you are with the person(s) you love. It also seems to help tremendously in the bonding of a mother to her child through her pregnancy and the delivery of said child. Read that years ago in some science mag, if you have complaints, please be kind and tell them yourself. :)

Also, the person in charge of proof reading my stories is currently unavailable, so any mistakes will be his fault anyway –happily throwing him under the bus-. On with it!

Warnings :Mention of abusive childhood, relationship between two males (Snarry) and MPreg / ! \ If you are not at ease with any of these topics, do not read.

Oxytocin

'Herm… Harry, you do know that wizards do not produce oxytocin when they are giving birth, don't you?'

Hermione had taken Harry away from the Weasley house to take a stroll around the orchard. They could still hear clearly laughs and voices talking between themselves coming from their backs. At that statement, Harry suddenly stopped walking.

'What do you mean they don't?' His left hand flew to his swollen belly where a seven months old baby was steadily growing.

'I thought so.' The browned haired girl sighed, shaking her head lightly.

She had been hearing Harry joke about this for months every time a friend would ask him if he felt really ready to have a child at such a young age. Being 20 years old, the Saviour had always answered this question by smiling mischievously and telling them hormones would probably do the trick. 'Oxytocin makes every pregnant person love their child when they are born anyway. I'll go from there.'

'Wizards and witches bodies do synthesise oxytocin when being intimate with their loved ones, but they do not when giving birth… In other words, the pain is mostly dealt with potions.'

'Wha- How come?!'

'Healers have just made this observation. Quite frankly, I believe they do not see the point to investigate as to why magical beings do not synthesise it in this particular circumstance seeing as most would never abandon their child. Even if unloved, they will care for it at least to the bare minimum of its needs. Wizards can be quite different from muggles when it comes to child rearing. Think about it, how do you research something that isn't there and most importantly, wouldn't you consider it a waste of time as it is not needed anyway?'

Harry understood what his friend was explaining, however he did not like it one bit. It was impossible to deny that the wizarding world was a few decades behind in technology compared with the muggle world. Considering they could bypass most of the physical work by flicking their wands at the devices, what use was there for washing machines and flatirons. They had the floo network for the telephones, they could apparate or fly a broom if they so desired to go to one place or another. All in all, why would they bother with why an hormone was there or not when a person was giving birth? Answer was, they would not. Simple as that.

'But… I've spent months saying oxytocin this and oxytocin that to everyone in order to get my nerves under control and not worry everyone with this matter… Why wouldn't they say anything about it?' Harry was quite dumbfounded. Nobody ever questioned what he said even when they knew he was wrong?

'Well, Harry… Adults most probably thought you were only joking or do not know the effects of oxytocin on muggle pregnant women, and as for the others… I am not entirely sure everyone in the wizarding world cares about hormones the way muggles do. Everything that happens to their bodies is regulated by their magical core. As long as it is working fine… Most people would not care about the why and how.' Hermione finished her sentence with a grimace and patted Harry's shoulder. Being muggle-born, she had been the only one who had really put two and two together and discovered the true meaning of Harry's answers.

'Do I even want to know how you came to be aware of this piece of trivia?' Harry had started to rub small circles on his stomach to ease his discomfort. His worries were all coming to the forefront of his mind and he needed to try and distract himself.

Hermione gave his friend a small smile at his attempt to lighten up the mood. Half-heartedly she shook her head to indicate that the The-Boy-Who-Lived-And-Now-Was-Pregnant would rather not hear about the way she came to know bout it. Not that it was anything to be kept secret but she would rather not speak about that time at all if it was possible. It had been the night after Draco called her a mudblood. She hadn't been able to sleep because of how upset she was. She decided to go to Madam Pomfrey for some help and while the Medi-witch was attending to a very ill first year, she had read a book in her office to steer her thoughts towards anything else but that day's events and the bllonde's insult. The book just so happened to be about comparing pregnancy and delivery in the wizarding world with the muggle world. She was happy it now came in handy. Harry had to talk things through with his lover anyway.

'Mione… What if… What if I can't bring myself to love my child?' Harry's voice was barely a whisper but broke mid-sentence.

'Oh, Harry! I'm sure you'll be fine. But… You need to talk about your fears. With Snape.' Hugging her friend as best as she could with the protruding baby bump, Hermione could feel the slight tremors going through Harry's shoulders. She knew what his friend was anxious about, she knew about his insecurities, especially about properly bringing up a child. He had asked her to help him research any book that could be of help on the subject. Slowly, the tears stopped and she rubbed cirlces on Harry's back to let him know, she was there for him.

Disentangling himself from her, Harry wondered 'What will Severus think of it, now? What will he think of me?'

'It will be alright, Harry. He loves you so much. You won't be alone raising this child. It will be loved by both its daddies.' She squeezed his shoulders one last time before they slowly made their way back to the Burrow where everyone had gathered for tea that afternoon.

Harry couldn't stand for too long since his ankles had become swollen thanks to his pregnancy. He would also lose control of his emotions if pushed too far, be it anger, pleasure or sorrow. When it all became too much to bear –and this could be achieved quite easily with him these days-, he would feel his magic roaring through his skin and start crying or laughing uncontrollably. He sighed, Hermione was right –when was she not, anyway?-, he had to speak with Severus about this. He was not looking forward to this discussion but to avoid further problems later on, this was a hurdle he would have to overcome. Hopefully, Severus would not be put off by what he had to say and they would be okay.

*back home*

Harry slumped in the couch, propping his legs up on an ottoman in front of him and sighed, feeling some relief from his back-ache. His hips felt terrible as if every nerve there was pulling at his lower back skin. He shifted a bit, trying to make it comfier but groaned as all he felt was his back protesting against the movement or protesting against its very existence. Very melodramatic. Nevertheless, it wasn't feeling nice. A whimper passed his clenched teeth.

'Are you alright?' Severus sat near him and observed him closely.

'My back and my hips. I'd say the state of them could be near the consistence of jelly, but I'm certain jelly doesn't relay this kind of pain to nerve endings. Nothing is working right in this body anymore.' Snape quirked an eyebrow at that. 'My feet and ankles are swollen, my legs cramp, my stomach is lurching at the mere smell of some food, my nipples are way too sensitive, my head hurt all the time and though I enjoy the cravings to some extent, them happening in the dead of the night tire me out and are the weirdest combinations ever…'

'The last one was… I would rather forget it ever happened to be honest.' Drawled the older man with a tiny shiver going through his shoulders.

Harry smiled faintly as he knew that the man was just joking though he had been quite taken aback at the time. Two nights ago, Severus had been woken up to Harry sitting up in bed with a tray on his legs reading a book while eating what appeared to be tomato and potato croquettes dipped in a mixture of orange juice and vanilla sundae. Casting a Tempus, the professor did not felt any surprise at realising Harry was eating that awfully disgusting combination of food at three o'clock. Pinching his nose bridge and then rubbing a tired hand over his face, Severus marvelled at how Harry could even feel fine after that and eat at breakfast as if he had not eaten anything since diner the day before. One day he came home to his lover eating pickles directly out the jar. Snape sighed.

'Come on. Let's get you to bed. I'll massage your hips to help you feel better.'

'Wait, Severus. I have something I'd like to tell you.' I'd much prefer telling you this here so you have a choice to stay by my side or finally see how much of a freak you call your lover is and flee. You'll either flee to the bedroom and I'll leave or you'll leave the flat first. Freak... Must it follow me all my life, like some sort of curse? Deciding against following that train of thought because he knew full well it would lead nowhere good, Harry crossed his legs under him and scooted as far back as he could to the far end of the couch, he'd need as much support as he could get. That conversation would not be an easy one.

Snape just sat back, fixing his gaze on his partner, was he making himself smaller by tucking his legs under himself? Narrowing his eyes, he could discern a faint shiver coursing through Harry's body. Was Severus just imagining the way the young man seemed to brace himself for a very unpleasant task?

'Wizards do not produce oxytocin when giving birth.' If it was going to be hard, Harry thought he might as well go right to the point and be done with this discussion as soon as possible. When he saw the surprised and searching look Severus bestowed on him, he knew he had to explain a bit more.

'The muggle women… When they are pregnant, their body produce oxytocin during their pregnancy and during the delivery. It seems to be an old chemical reaction happening naturally. The body releases oxytocin to help the mother care for the baby without really having to think about it. Just so they wouldn't be able abandon it too easily.'

Harry glanced at the older man to make sure he was following his train of thoughts. If the way his eyes were trained on his face were anything to go by, then Snape was following along just fine.

Great, now it gets a bit tricky.

'I have no recollection of being loved by my family. My blood related family, at least. The Dursleys were not fond of magic, to say the least.' He saw that Severus was on the brink of interrupting him but he did not let him. I need to get this over with quick or I'll never have the courage to say it again.

'I basically have no idea whatsoever of how to love a child. I've read all useful material about bringing up children, about taking care of them, what to do and what to avoid as far as education styles are concerned… I have all this theoretical knowledge but no experience with loving and caring for a child, or to put it plainly, being loved and cared for as a child.'

Harry dared not look at Severus after teling him this. How disappointed in him he must be. He would not bear to see the hurt and anger that surely would be swirling in his black eyes, he would not bear to see his sweet and pliant lips be reduced to a thin line of disgust, he would not bear for his last memory of the man's face to be one of sadness and betrayal. Hanging his head low he drapped his hands protectively around his baby bump and shut his eyes tightly, waiting for Severus reaction. Don't leave, please, please, don't leave me.

'You hoped the oxytocin would help you… Care properly for the child?'

It had been barely a whisper but he saw the young man clench his jaw and give a small nod while hunching himself further, coiling himself round his stomach, subconciously protecting it from any harm. What Harry had sprung on him was quite a lot of information to process. Occlumency sessions with the boy had indeed shown that those muggles had not treated Harry right most of the time, scolding him too much, giving him all the chores to do by himself… Had there been more? Severus hadn't seen anything going beyond that, yet a nagging feeling in his guts had him wondering what those filthy excuses of human beings might have done to explain how The-Saviour-Of-The-Wizarding-World would rely on a damn hormone to be able to love and care for his child. Minutes had passed without another word uttered, Harry paled more and more and Severus could see him worrying his lower lip between his teeth.

'Are you regretting it? Are you regretting becoming pregnant?' He had to know. It was already too late to do anything about it, but Severus needed to know where Harry's feelings on the matter stood.

Harry whipped his face upright. 'No! Never! I would never regret this. I would never regret anything I am allowed to have with you! I would not be able to stand losing you but I had to let you know how much of a... How much of a freak I am. I had to give you a chance to…'

He had stopped mid-sentence but his words hung heavily in the air over their heads. He had to give me a chance to escape. Merlin, the boy felt responsible to give him an opportunity to leave him.

Harry felt bad for Severus and bit hard on his tongue to prevent himself from saying anything more. The man seemed to be struck in his place and incapable of moving. However, he had to do this, before Severus would completely feel like he had to stay by his side by obligation because of the baby, he took upon himself to provide him with some sort of escape lane, an open door for him to flee when it would all become too much, when he would finally see Harry for what he really was, damaged goods.

Dealing with damaged goods, well… Not everybody wants to, right? Sev' knows I was screwed up by the war, but not that there's more where it came from... Harry thought bitterly.

Harry felt the couch dip and sink under his weight a little more as Snape stood up.

It's okay, it's fine, I am fine. I will be fine. Maybe he'll let me visit our little boy, he wouldn't completely cut me off, would he? I can manage it, I can deal with the pain, I just need to adapt, it's fine, it's fine. It would have taken a fool not to walk away. I intended to give him an escape lane, Severus took it. Cannot blame him, can I? To be honest, I sometimes do not want to stay with myself either.

Yet the patience and loving of his ex-professor had helped him sift through these murky feelings and soothe the aches in his soul more times than he cared to count.

I'm fine. I'm fine. I, am fine.

You're fine, Harry. Except…

Except you are not.

Tears were on the verge of falling through his eyelashes and a strangled sob escaped his throat before he felt strong arms wrap around him and lips pressing themselves against his forehead before moving next to his ear.

'I am not going anywhere, Harry. Not now, not ever. I will keep standing next to you for as long as you will let me. It is okay to have fears, it is okay to ask for help, it is okay to rely more on me, on your friends and on your adoptive family. You have done nothing but a wonderful job with Teddy every time you were together, you know how to love unconditionnally and you know how to forgive people for their past mistakes too. These are strengths, Harry. I am no stranger to unhappy childhood either. I do not know yet to what extent yours was broken, but if anything, this experience taught you what to avoid at all costs.'

Severus let himself place a soft and slow kiss on Harry's lips. 'We are in this together, we will raise him right, maybe we will falter at some point, but rest assured someone will set us straight again. Be it one of us or our friends. Maybe even one of those infuriating Weasley Twins. I know we will raise our child to be a marvellous wizard and wonderful person.'

A small smile graced Harry's features and relief coursed through his frame letting his shoulders sag. Harry cried all the tears he never shed upon his ruined childhood when he stayed with the Dursleys in Severus arms, letting them fall freely, sobbing and crying out at times too. He had to let go of all that. It would not be easy to do so, but Severus would help him get through it. The man had given Harry something he had always wanted. Since the beginning of their relationship he had given him a sense of belonging somewhere, Severus had… accepted him. Harry wasn't sure if amidst his crying, he uttered his thanks aloud or not, but felt incredibly grateful to have this man in his life and be the father of his child.

'I love you. I love you, Severus.'

'Love you too. All is fine, Harry. We are here for one another. Never forget this.'

Harry was exhausted and let himself be steered to the bedroom. Severus swapped easily his clothes for pajamas with his wand for the both of them and gently laid them in their bed, snuggling under the covers and protecting his lover and future child in his embrace.

It would get better, now.

Aw, a happy ending. How sweet. Do you have any thoughts on this story? Let me know! It's not my first time fiddling with MPreg, but it is the first to ever be posted...

I am kinda worried this story won't be read that much considering HP ended so long ago. Oh well... Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it. xxx