Disclaimer: I do not own any of the original iCarly characters, the other characters you do not know are mine. All mine, I tell you.

Sam rolled her eyes as she entered the doors of Mrs. Papadopoulos' Life Sciences class, the only class of the day she shared with Freddie and not Carly. Of course, the only reason Sam took this class was for the food. Okay, so they didn't cook everyday which was a downer, but Sam came to class with her hopes up of being fed.

Sam took a seat in the back, three seats away from Freddie who was jotting down something in his notebook probably a stupid idea for iCarly, that the girls would pass over of course. Sam wished she had her cell phone so she could text Carly, unfortunately it had been in her backpack when she smashed it into her locker earlier. Eh, she was needing a new phone anyway.

The bell rang, signaling that it was time to go back to sleep. She folded her arms and rested her head on the desk, her blond hair falling around her.

Freddie rolled his eyes when he saw Sam asleep. In a few years when he and Carly were going to the senior prom together Sam would still be here in the eighth grade, asleep. He positioned his pencil over his notebook ready to take notes.

"Welcome to the first day of the new chapter in Life Sciences," Mrs. Papadopoulos said, putting three different colored top hats on her desk. "For one week, you will be married, given a job, and a bouncing newborn." She pulled a blanket away from a crib full of plastic babies wearing diapers. "You will be given all the responsibilities of adulthood." She picked up a clipboard and put her reading glasses on, Freddie smiled if Sam had been awake she'd probably say something about Mrs. Papadopoulos' golf ball sized pupils. "When I call your name, come to the front and greet your spouse, get your occupation and your newborn."

Most of the class groaned, but Freddie seemed eager for the new challenge. He was secretly hoping to be "married" to Diana Stephenson, the girl who was second to Carly in his heart.

"Max Carson and Diana Stephenson," Mrs. Papadopoulos read from her clipboard.

Freddie silently groaned and scanned the room for a runner-up. She ended up being married off, he kept scanning until he heard his name called.

"Freddie and Sam."

"Noooooooo!" Freddie exclaimed. Anything but being married to Sam.

Sam pulled herself out of her sleep at the sound of her name. "I didn't do it," she exclaimed.

Mrs. Papadopoulos tilted her frizzy red head and frowned. "Do what Miss ?" she asked.

Sam shrugged. "Nothing," she replied.

"You are married to Freddie."

Sam shot a look at her friend by association. "Ew."

"Freddie, Sam. Come to the front and get your occupations and your newborn."

"Wait, I had a kid with him, too?" Sam asked, standing up and walking to the front.

"You're not a picnic, either," Freddie replied.

"Who says that anymore?" Sam asked, sticking her hand in the top hat marked "JOBS."

She pulled her hand out and opened the folded piece of paper. "Teacher? I'm a teacher." She stared at her salary. "You really make that much?"

"Sad, isn't it," Mrs. Papadopoulos said.

Freddie opened his. "Cool, Graphic Designer." He smiled at his salary. "Don't worry, Sam. I can support our family."

Sam rolled her eyes, until Mrs. Papadopoulos handed her a plastic baby. "Congratulations on your baby boy," she said. She turned and handed another to Freddie. "Uh-oh. Looks like twins! Congratulations, it's a girl!"

"What?" Sam asked.

"You had been randomly chosen to have twins," she said, smiling. "Since we had an extra baby. Now spend the rest of class thinking of names for your bouncing bundles of joy." She reached out and strapped a bracelet around both of their wrists. "When your babies cry stick the key into their back and hold it there until the crying stops."

Sam smiled, and shoved her key into Freddie's back. "Ow, Sam!" he said, through clenched teeth. This was going to be a long week.

Carly was standing at her locker when a crying plastic baby was shoved next to her head. She screamed and jumped back, staring at Sam. "Sam!" she exclaimed. "What is that?"

"Ah, Auntie Carly, don't you remember your niece, Anne?" she asked. Anne in honor of Anne Frank…or so that's what she told Mrs. P, it was just to help Sam remember what she was reading for English.

"Or your nephew, Freddie Jr.?" Freddie asked, carrying the other plastic baby.

"Cute," Carly replied, turning back to her locker.

"Oh by the way," Sam said. "Freddie and I are married."

That definitely got Carly's attention, she whipped around to face them. "Married? You, two," she snorted. "Those poor babies."

"Yeah," Sam said, opening her locker and throwing Anne in upside down resulting in the doll screaming its plastic head off.

"Sam!" Freddie exclaimed reaching in the locker, pulling out his plastic daughter who stopped crying immediately. "These dolls have microchips in them. Mrs. Papadopoulos is going to know that you've mistreated the baby."

"How would she know it was me?" Sam asked in her matter-of-fact tone. "Coulda been you."

Freddie stared her down. "Need I remind you. This whole marriage and family thing counts as fifty percent of our final grade. I cannot fail this class because you mistreat our children."

"Boo. Hoo," Sam said, reaching out and taking Freddie, Jr. "Fine, you take little Anne to Math with you and I'll take Nerd, Jr. to gym with me."

Freddie pictured his fake-son being kicked around and exposed to the girl's locker room. "How about I take them both to Math."

"You only have one key. What if they both start crying?" Sam arched an eyebrow.

Freddie hated being outwitted, especially by Sam. "Fine," he said. "But take Anne. She's a girl. So it's better for her."

Sam rolled her eyes and cradled her daughter, she turned on her heel and walked to the gymnasium while Freddie went to math. Carly smiled to herself. "This could be fun," she said, to no one in particular and raced off to class as the bell rang.

A/N: Review if you want. Will update ASAP.

I've always liked this last name for some reason