Warning: spoilers for Eclipse
This is Bella's attempt to seduce Edward (from Eclipse) from Edward's point of view...
In character for the most part.
Disclaimer: The dialogue in this piece is pretty much exactly the same as Chapter 20 from Eclipse so Copyright to Stephenie Meyer.
Compromise
I had asked her to try and forget the dangers of the looming weekend. I was so sick of the fear and anxiety we had all been under from the threat that was Victoria, even the stress from associating with the wolves had stretched my family's patience, Jasper's and Rosalie's especially.
But just for tonight I wanted Bella to allow me to make her forget that so the two of us could be together and just us. Not bickering over her mortality, although I still desperately thought of ways I could by the silly girl more time, she really had no idea of what she was giving up... and for what? An eternity as a parasite? All of time with the selfish creature who had let her become that parasite, or leech as the Quileute's called it.
As she drove her decrepit old Chevy truck down the winding drive way to my home, I was happy to go at her pace for once; happy to listen to her steady heartbeat and even breathing as she bit her lip and peered through the windshield. She looked almost... anxious? The old insecurities gripped me as I thought she might be nervous to spend the night with a vampire, I wouldn't blame her. I kept my thoughts from my face however and breathed deeply her scent, revelling in the pain it ignited in my throat but smug that I would never again be able to threaten her safety because of my evil nature.
As soon as she halted the truck, I was at her door; her overnight bag on my shoulder and her impossibly frail body cradled against my chest. I eagerly sought her lips as carried her into the large, white house Esme had decorated so skilfully. I remembered Bella's tendency to overreact when we kissed so I reluctantly drew back, reigning in my enthusiasm after several moments that may as well have been seconds or years for all I noticed while her soft, hot lips keenly pressed to mine.
I chuckled in sheer joy at the thought of having tonight together, alone, without the third wheel of Charlie just rooms away.
"Welcome home," I said warmly, my eyes reading deep into her deep, brown ones; she was breathtaking.
"That sounds nice." I watched her lips as they flexed and stretched to shape and mouth the words before loosing them from her tongue.
My thoughts flickered to her gift upstairs and I felt a very human nervousness pass through me as I battled several more insecurities centred this time around whether or not she would like my present. I kept my tone light, relaxed.
"I have something for you."
"Oh?" I immediately heard her disapproval in that one syllable word, this dislike of gifts could be incredibly frustrating; however, I could afford to be patient tonight.
"Your hand-me-down, remember? You said that was allowable" She made a face.
"Oh, that's right. I guess I did say that." I sniggered at her lack of enthusiasm but nodded to the stairs, brushing my fingers against the back of her hand.
"It's up in my room. Shall I go get it?" I offered only a little concerned about her safety against all those steps. The oddest expression crossed her features, embarrassment, bemusement and excitement all at once; she looked almost... scheming.
She twined her warm fingers with my dead, cold ones. "Sure, let's go."
I swiftly pulled her closer to me and, ignoring the tiresome burning in my throat, tugged her into my arms as I sprinted upstairs. I let her down inside the doorway and skipped lightly to the closet, I opened the top draw, remembering exactly where I had left the heart charm.
When I flashed to her side she had barely blinked, I smirked to myself at her charmingly vulnerable human reflexes. She sat gracefully, or as gracefully as Bella could, on the gold duvet. She wrapped her arms around her knees and glared at me.
"Okay," she grouched, "Let me have it." I laughed at her apprehensive expression; what did she think I had got her?
I quickly scooted up beside her and heard the expected stutter in her heartbeat, I had always hoped that her body's natural fear of my proximity would disappear after some time of becoming accustomed to me but physically her instincts were very much human.
Ignoring my melancholy, I gently took her wrist and quickly added my charm to the bracelet the dog had given her. "A hand-me-down," I reminded her when her face turned dangerous.
She studied the heart shaped crystal intently, surprise the dominant emotion on her beautiful face; evidently she had expected something much different. As the seconds wore on, and she said nothing, insecurities took over; did she hate it? Of course she would, Bella hated expensive gifts! To top it off, she gave a gasp.
"It was my mother's." I made it sound nonchalant and belittling, as if it were of no consequence to me. "I inherited quite a few baubles like this. I've given some to Esme and Alice both. So, clearly, this is no big deal in any way." But it is, I added in my mind.
She smiled at my somewhat see though attempt at indifference, always so observant, I pretended I hadn't seen it.
"But I thought it was a good representation, it's hard and cold," here my voice turned a tad bitter, but I laughed to shake it off. "And it throws rainbows in the sunlight."
"You forgot its most important similarity: it's beautiful." She muttered quietly, stroking the cool gem.
"My heart is just as silent," I muttered in quiet dejection, I glanced again at her face. "And it, too, is yours."
She moved her wrist and continued to watch the gently swaying heart. "Thank you. For both."
"No, thank you. It's a relief to have you accept a gift so easily. Good practice for you, too." I grinned at the thought of the many things I could buy her once I convinced her to marry me.
My thoughts changed directions somewhat when she pushed herself against my side, her head snuggled under my arm; it can't have been very comfortable for her but I pulled her closer anyhow, greedy for any contact we could share. Even if it did send my throat alight.
"Can we discuss something?" She asked abruptly, and all of a sudden that strange nervousness was around her again. "I'd appreciate it if you could begin by being open-minded."
I paused to consider her every word, hunting for some hidden meaning...
"I'll give my best effort," I agreed almost suspiciously; something about her voice made me wary.
She must have picked up on my caution. "I'm not breaking any rules here; this is strictly about you and me." She paused to clear her throat and became oddly formal. "So... I was impressed by how well we were able to compromise the other night. I was thinking I would like to apply the same principle to a different situation."
I hardly heard the words, I was elated. She was finally being reasonable and I was fairly certain I could get the best of this compromise. "What would you like to negotiate?" I asked, thinking we sounded like a poorly scripted villain scene. She didn't answer, and she wouldn't look at me; her heart was going like mad, it was beating at least twice as fast as normal.
"Listen to your heart fly," I said aloud. "It's fluttering like a hummingbird's wings. Are you alright?" Please, God, don't let her have a heart attack.
"I'm great." She choked out, I realised this was a mental struggle she was having and not a physical attack of her body. Although it did reassure me I don't think I had ever been more frustrated by the silent thoughts than now.
"Please go on then," before I die of anticipation, I added mentally.
"Well, I guess, first, I wanted to talk to you about that whole ridiculous marriage condition thing."
Ridiculous? Ouch. "It's only ridiculous to you," I managed to keep the sulk out of my voice. "What about it?"
"I was wondering... is that open to negotiation?" She didn't sound very hopeful.
I frowned. "I've already made the largest concession by far and away – I've agreed to take your life away," my voice soured, "against my better judgement. And that ought to entitle me to a few compromises on your part."
I saw the answer on her face before she even spoke. "No," she shook her head. "That part's a done deal. We're not discussing my... renovations right now. I want to hammer out some other details."
I didn't like where this was going. The clumsy mask of composure she was trying to keep on only strengthened my belief that I wasn't going to like whatever she was driving at. "What details to you mean exactly."
"Let's clarify your perquisites first." She said to buy herself more time, I guessed.
"You know what I want." I reminded her firmly, quickly tiring of this game.
"Matrimony." She almost groaned the word.
"Yes," I grinned, first matrimony but after that so much more. "To start with."
Her composure fell, surprise took its place. "There's more?"
"Well," I had to backtrack fast now, "if you're my wife, then what's mine is yours... like tuition money. So there would be no problem with Dartmouth." I watched her slyly, pleased with my reasoning; Bella however was not amused.
"Anything else?" She asked flatly. "While you're already being absurd?"
I ignored her tone. "I wouldn't mind some more time." I said this without any real hope of discussion; she was so concerned with staying as close to my physical age as possible, as if it really mattered.
"No." She said defiantly, as expected. "No time. That's a deal breaker right there."
I couldn't keep the longing from my voice, I was sure that I could come up with a plausible excuse in just a couple of weeks to keep her human. "Just a year or two?"
She shook her head, her mouth twisted in a stubborn line. "Move along to the next one."
"That's it. Unless you'd like to talk cars..." I smiled hugely at this, just teasing her now; when she grimaced I took her hand, tracing her slender fingers. "I didn't realise there was anything else you wanted besides being transformed into a monster yourself. I'm extremely curious." I admitted in a low voice, wondering again what thoughts were running through her mind as she stared at my hand on hers. All of a sudden her cheeks began to flame bright red, the way they did when she was embarrassed.
I let my free hand brush the heat of her face. "You're blushing? Please, Bella, the suspense is painful."
She bit her lip; I was running out of patience. "Bella." I tried to sound severe; it was always hard for me when I couldn't read other people's thoughts, namely Bella's.
"Well, I'm a little worried... about after," she finally said looking up at me, I immediately felt my muscles stiffen.
"What has you worried?" I had to struggle to keep my voice even and calm.
"All of you seem so convinced that the only thing I'm going to be interested in, afterward, is slaughtering everyone in town," she admitted glancing away when I winced at her wording. "And I'm afraid I'll be so preoccupied with the mayhem that I won't be me anymore... and that I won't... I won't want you in the same way I do now."
"Bella, that part doesn't last forever." I said in almost relief; I had thought she wanted to discuss Rosalie's reasons for wanting to be human.
"Edward, there's something I want to do before I'm not human anymore." She muttered, staring at her wrist; I wondered why she looked as though she were about to wrestled a lion.
I waited for her to elaborated, nothing came. "Whatever you want," I promised, worried by the shade of red she had turned.
"Do you promise?" She muttered, quietly.
"Yes," I said eager to give her something she seemed willing to receive. "Tell me what you want, and you can have it."
"You," she whispered so quietly another human this close would not have heard.
"I'm yours." I reminded her with a smile, how could she doubt that? I tried to hold her gaze, to read her thoughts in her eyes as I usually could but she kept looking away.
After a couple of seconds she kneeled in front of me, her hands trailing up my chest to wrap around my neck. Slowly she bought her lips to mine.
I was still unsure as to what she was trying to ask for but, as whenever I kissed Bella, her taste sent all trivial thoughts to the very back of my mind. Her very human taste was different from her blood but just as sweet, it brought back dim memories of the taste of sugar and cream. Through this Bella-induced haze my mind was as well searching for a reason behind her odd behaviour.
I was bewildered. Just then she shakily let her hands slide back down my chest to the front of my shirt, they trembled and she undid my top button.
Three things happened in quick succession.
One: the monster inside me sniffed hopefully at my restraint.
Two: A new and unbelievably powerful lust woke inside of me, making me gasp for a lungful of air I did not need.
And three: I pushed her away.
"Be reasonable, Bella." I admonished, trying to get a handle on this new lust; just what I needed, a new way to thirst for Bella's body.
"You promised – whatever I wanted," she tried to lock me with words but even she didn't seem to think I would be trapped by that.
"We're not having this discussion." I glowered at her as I quickly refastened my shirt; a defensive anger darkened her face as she clenched her jaw.
"I say we are," she snarled, raising her hands to tug open the top of her shirt enough that her bra was clearly visible. I closed my eyes for a moment as the new lust flared, and I immediately knew what kind of lust I was dealing with.
I took her wrists into my hands before she could tempt me any further and pinned them to her side.
"I say we're not," I told her. We just glared at one another, she in anger and me in an attempt to control myself.
Her face was still flushed. "You wanted to know," she muttered sulkily, I rolled my eyes in exasperation; was she so intent on making this harder than necessary?
"I thought it would be something faintly realistic."
"So you can ask for any stupid, ridiculous thing you want – like getting married – but I'm not allowed to even discuss what I-"
I swiftly adjusted my grip so I could restrain her with one hand and stop her talking with the other; that she wanted me this way didn't please me as much as less noble parts of me would have liked. That she wanted to put herself in this new dangerous situation strengthened my belief that she was and apparently would continue to be a danger magnet.
"No." I said in what I hoped she took to be a final voice, she took a deep breath and looked down at bed beneath us. I knew something was wrong immediately and not just because of her distraught expression but also because she had stopped arguing.
Moisture gathered in her eyes and her face flushed bright red, I moved my hand to tilt her face up so I could see her eyes. "What now?"
"Nothing," she muttered, sounding mortified. I didn't understand her sudden chagrin and studying her facial expression wasn't made easy when she tried to twist out from my grip on her chin.
Uh oh...
"D-did I hurt your feeling?" I gasped in horror at the idea. Idiot, Edward! Stupid!
"No," she mumbled but I could hear the lie in her voice.
I yanked her quickly into my lap, pressing her head into my shoulder as I stroked down her cheek. How could she think I didn't want her?
"You know why I have to say no," I whispered desperate for her to understand. "You know that I want you, too."
"Do you?" She replied; how could she sound so unsure?
"Of course I do, you silly, beautiful, oversensitive girl." I gave a short laugh and remembered the pup day dreaming of holding Bella in a similar embrace. I felt my voice harden. "Doesn't everyone? I feel like there's a line behind me, jockeying for my position, waiting for me to make a big enough mistake... you're too desirable for your own good."
But of course, being Bella, she couldn't see this. "Who's being silly now?" she muttered dryly, pushing her forehead against my stone cold chest.
"Do I have to send a petition around to get you to believe? Shall I tell you whose names would be on the top of the list? You know a few of them, but some might surprise you." I felt her shake her head, stubbornly refusing her own allure.
"You're just trying to distract me," she accused, right as always. "Let's get back to the subject."
I sighed in defeat.
"Tell me if I have anything wrong," she continued in a forced indifferent tone. "Your demands are marriage, paying my tuition, more time, and you wouldn't mind if my vehicle went a little faster." She glanced up at me with a raised eyebrow. "Did I get everything? That's a hefty list."
I shook my head, hiding my smirk. "Only the first is a demand, the others are merely requests."
She went on as if I hadn't spoken. "And my lone, solitary little demand is-"
I interrupted her, all amusement gone. "Demand?"
"Yes, demand." She raised her chin stubbornly; I glared at her, she had no idea what she was asking. She must have seen my disapproving expression. "Getting married is a stretch for me. I'm not giving in unless I get something in return."
"No," I muttered firmly, although a large part of me craved to give her what she wanted. "It's not possible now. Later, when you're less breakable." I kissed her forehead. "Be patient, Bella."
"But that's the problem." She said frustratedly. "I won't be the same when I'm less breakable. I won't be the same! I don't know who I'll be then."
I ignored the flutter of worry that momentarily blossomed in my chest. "You'll still be Bella," I told her.
Her brow creased in a worried frown. "If I'm so far gone that I'd want to kill Charlie – that I'd drink Jacob's blood or Angela's if I got the chance – how can that be true?"
"It will pass," I assured her. "And I doubt you'll want to drink the dog's blood. Even as a newborn, you'll have better taste than that."
She again went on as impassioned as ever. "But that will always be what I want most, won't it? Blood, blood and more blood!"
How could she think that when I hadn't killed her and her blood smelled sweeter to me than anything else in my existence? "The fact that you are still alive is proof that that is not true."
"Over eighty years later," she pointed out, her voice softened slightly as she went on. "What I meant was physically, though. Intellectually, I know I'll be able to be myself... after a while. But just purely physically – I will always be thirsty, more than anything else."
I didn't response, I couldn't, not past the uncomfortable lump that had lodged itself in my throat. It always happened when I fully comprehended Bella becoming the immortally dammed.
"So I will be different," she insisted, staring up at me with her large, brown eyes shining. "Because right now, physically, there's nothing I want more than you. More than food or water or oxygen. Intellectually, I have my priorities in a slightly more sensible order. But physically..."
She kissed my palm, leaving tingling shivers behind; I took an unsteady breath and locked my eyes with hers.
"Bella," I whispered mournfully. "I could kill you."
She cocked her head to the side. "I don't think you could."
I felt my face tense as I reached behind me to the bed head. There was only one way to make her fully realise how insanely dangerous her idea was. I didn't look away from her face as I easily broke and crushed the black metal, offering the destroyed decoration to her on my palm.
"That's not what I meant." She said after a moment. "I already know how strong you are. You didn't have to break the furniture."
"What did you mean then?" I asked darkly, flicking the metal to the corner of my room.
"Obviously not that you aren't physically able to hurt me, if you wanted to... More that, you don't want to hurt me... so much that I don't think that you ever could."
I shook my head, unconvinced.
"It might not work like that, Bella."
"Might. You have no more idea what you're talking about than I do." She jeered at my excuse.
"Exactly. Do you imagine I would ever take that kind of risk with you?" I asked through my teeth.
She watched me for a long time, perhaps hoping to see indecision in my face but I was firm on this point. It was for her own safety. Her face crumpled slightly in defeat and she dropped her head onto my shoulder.
"Please," she whispered in a hopeless voice. "Please.
My anger and frustration melted away as I saw how much she truly wanted this, no matter how self destructive it was. And if I was completely honest with myself, I wanted it too. Not just for the personal pleasure but for giving Bella something she obviously wanted. I could feel my breathing become uneven as I thought through what this would involve; the new and powerful thirst rose in me again as I studied Bella's form pressed against me.
She glanced up. "Please? You don't have to make me any guarantees. If it doesn't work out right, well, then that's that. Just let us try... only try. And I'll give you what you want!" She babbled on unaware to the intense conflict rushing through me. "I'll marry you. I'll let you pay for Dartmouth, and I won't complain about the bribe to get me in. You can even buy me a fast car if that makes you happy! Just... please."
I had only just got myself back under control, repressed the intense thirst and evened my breathing. I leaned down so I could whisper in her ear; Goosebumps were raised by my cold breath.
"This is unbearable. So many things I've wanted to give you – and this is what you decide to demand. Do you have any idea how painful it is, trying to refuse you when you plead with me this way?" I tried to keep the lust out of my voice, but even so it came out a little husky.
"Then don't refuse," she suggested in a breathless and entirely tempting voice.
I couldn't respond.
"Please."
"Bella..." I was almost begging her to stop. Very soon I wouldn't have the willpower to stop us from doing something very stupid indeed. I shook my head but it was only because I knew I should, every part of me was screaming yes.
I heard her heart speed up before she twisted in my arms and pressed her lips softly to mine, and that was it. All safety measure were pushed to the very back of my mind as I grabbed her face in each of my hands and kissed her back fiercely.
I wasn't as gentle as I should have been. My movements were not so much conscious thought as instinct and her body's responses were gasoline to my fire. I could feel her trembling against me and I was fairly sure it wasn't from the cold of my skin.
When she had to break the kiss to gasp for air I quickly moved to her throat, trailing a line of kisses with my lips. Bella was more confident that usual and she quickly unbuttoned my shirt, I very nearly moaned when she traced the features of my chest. I slid one hand down her face, her front to grip her waist and pull her closer to me... closer; she was still too far away.
It was only when I felt her struggle to undo her own shirt that some semblance of control returned. It snapped back like a rubber band stretched too tight, this was going way to fast.
I pushed her back so she was lying with her head on a pillow, my hands restraining hers above her head.
I leaned down to whisper in her ear. "Bella, would you please stop trying to take your clothes off?"
"Do you want to do that part?" She asked breathlessly, her chest heaving; I had managed to get a reign fully on myself.
"Not tonight."
"Edward, don't-" I cut her off before she could start begging again, that would really set me off.
"I'm not saying no, I'm just saying not tonight." I assured her kissing her cheek softly.
"Give me one good reason why tonight is not as good as any other night." She demanded in winded frustration.
"I wasn't born yesterday," I said in amusement at her impatient hormones. "Out of the two of us, which do you think is more unwilling to give the other what they want? You just promised to marry me before you do any changing, but if I give in tonight, what guarantee do I have that you won't go running off to Carlisle in the morning? I am – clearly -" I almost growled the understatement out," much less reluctant to give you what you want. Therefore... you first."
She exhaled in a loud pout. "I have to marry you first?" the scepticism in her voice made me smile.
"That's the deal – take it or leave it." I thoroughly enjoyed this entire situation, if only I could get her to forget her irrational desire to become a vampire. "Compromise, remember?" I kissed her deeply, enjoying the forbidden taste of her lips.
"I think that's a really bad idea," she gasped out once I drew away to let her breathe.
I smirked. "I'm not surprised you feel that way, you have a one-tracked mind."
"How did this happen?" She lamented. "I thought I was holding my own tonight – for once – and now, all of a sudden-"
"You're engaged," I whispered, beyond ecstatic at the idea.
"Ew! Please don't say that out loud." I bit my lip to keep from smiling, and decided to play around for a bit.
"Are you going back on your word?" I asked in a mock indignant voice, not quite able to keep the amusement from my face. Then again, amusement was putting it a bit lightly.
She glared at me. "Are you?" I asked, a tad unsure now.
"Ugh!" She threw her head back onto the pillow and groaned. "No. I'm not. Are you happy now?"
I grinned so wide I actually felt my stone cheeks ache. "Exceptionally."
You have no idea!
She made another sound that made me think she was in pain. "Aren't you happy at all?" I asked her, kissing her deeply again.
"A little bit," she grudgingly admitted; she gave me a heated once over. "But not about getting married."
Right... because this chapter is so freaking MASSIVE, I'm going to publish this as the first part of a two part story, ok? Well if it's not ok that's to bad pal 'cause I have the power!!!!! Mwhahahahaa.... right.
Anyhow. There may be quite a few typos but bear with it.
You most welcome!
- ShakeItBlue