Author:
Pairing: E/O
Rating: PG-13, for strong language and sexual situations
Summary: Good music, too much to drink. He'd called her again...
Spoilers: Eh, probably up to Quarry. Just episode references :)
Disclaimer: Don't sue....they don't belong to me...and all I got is some lint in my pocket. The band 'Nickel' owns the song Stupid Thing. It's a great song...you can find it at their website
Feedback: Please! I have insomnia, can't decide what I want do with Youthful Indiscretions, and this one came to me in the middle of the night
I did a stupid thing last night,
I called you.
A moment of weakness.
No, not a moment,
More like three months of weakness.
I'm one step away from crashing to my knees.
One step away from spilling my guts to you.
I did a stupid thing last night,
I called you.
I'm doing all right.
No, don't feel sorry for me,
Really, I'm all right.
I'm one step away from crashing to my knees.
One step away from spilling my guts to you.
You see, there's this huge chunk of me missing.
It's gone.
And I can' feel it, I can't feel it,
I can't feel.
I did a stupid thing last night,
I called you.
It's the last time,
And maybe tomorrow night, will be the last time...
And I'm one step away from crashing to my knees.
(One step away from crashing to my knees)
One step away from spilling my guts to you.
(One step away from spilling my guts to you)
One step away from crashing to my knees.
(One step away from spilling my guts to you)
One step away from spilling my guts to you.
(One step away from spilling my guts to you)
Home of Elliot Stabler
He woke with a pounding in his head. Great, must have been one of those nights again. More often than not when he wasn't at work he was drowning at one of the local bars. The bartenders were getting to know him quite well, as again more often than not, he had to call someone to bring him home. Apparently, last night had been no exception. He winced when he thought of how badly Olivia was going to chew his ass when he finally got to the station house. She was number one on his speed dial and generally that was all he could remember.
For the past two weeks now, he had only gotten home because of her. He didn't think she even slept that much anymore, just laid there until the phone rang. Honestly, she didn't even say anything anymore. Just got him in the car and helped into his apartment. She'd feed him aspirin and help sober him up before she went home. He couldn't remember her doing that last night though. He couldn't remember anything but his friend Jack Daniels. Now he was paying for it. He just hoped he could butter her up with coffee and maybe some kind of bagel or pasty.
Last night had been particularly hard. He'd been with Kathy and Dickie at the hospital for two days. Kathy barely spoke to him and he guessed it was just as well. However, even with him being sick, Dickie still wanted to talk about when he and Mom were going to come back home. Kathy had told him that right now Daddy was just too busy with his job and that she needed the extra help taking care of all of them. Great, make him the bad guy. Yet, he supposed she was right. It was his fault she had left. He hadn't given her or their kids the attention they so needed and deserved. All he had ever wanted was to provide for his family and to make sure they were safe.
Elliot shook his head to clear his thoughts and stumbled out of bed. God, he didn't want to work. He wanted to crawl back in his bed and pretend it was all one big nightmare. That his wife hadn't taken their kids and left him, that he hadn't failed as a husband and a partner....oh shit. That brought on a whole other wave of guilt. Cragen and Munch had been taking up the slack for him while Dickie was in the hospital. Sure, he had seen his partner, but it had been for his emotional benefit. Crap, where was he when she needed his emotional support?
He wasn't going to pretend this case had been easy on her. Obviously, if their only lucid conversation had been the one in the stationhouse last night. She had been worried about what kind of genes she would pass on to her kids...he'd responded automatically when she said something about how she herself had been raised.
'Look how great you turned out' he had told her.
There was nothing more true. No matter how she had been brought up or what kind of genetics she had been given, Olivia had the biggest heart of anyone he had ever met. Sometimes she wore it on her sleeve. Besides, look at how she took care of him. Since she found out Kathy left him, she had been nothing but supportive. Asking him if counseling wouldn't work, anything she thought might help reconcile him with his wife. She didn't understand though. He could go back to Kathy, but only on one condition. That he gave up being a detective. He couldn't do that. He couldn't just walk away from this job and he wouldn't walk away from his partner.
He had scoffed at Olivia when they first started working together. She believed in the whole soulmate thing. At the time he thought that it was complete bullshit, but over the years he had come to realize that she was right. Everyone did have a soulmate. Unfourtanetly for him, his wasn't Kathy. No, his soulmate came in the shape of a partner. As Kathleen would often tell Dickie and Lizzie 'that's so totally against the rules". He didn't deny that it was. Hell, he knew better than anyone that it was.
Elliot was so lost in his thoughts that it didn't hit him until he got out of the shower that he smelled coffee brewing. Definately odd, because the last time he checked he lived alone. Hurriedly, he threw on a pair of pants and headed down the stairs. He cursed softly when he realized he didn't bring his gun, but then again what kind of burglar brewed coffee in the house they were robbing anyways. However, the sight that greeted him made his jaw drop.
Olivia was cooking breakfast in his kitchen, or at least trying too. That wasn't the fasinating part to Elliot though. No, the real jaw dropper was that she was wearing his clothes. His NYPD shirt hung almost down to her knees and she had on a pair of his socks.
Just what the hell had happened last night? Or maybe the better question was why was he so disappointed that he couldn't remember?
Olivia seemed to sense his presence and turned to face him with a grin.
" It's about time you got your lazy ass up, Partner. I told myself if you weren't up in ten minutes, I was going to do something drastic" she teased
His mouth finally shut when she handed him a cup of coffee. Who knew Olivia had domestic tendencies?
"Uhhh Liv..." he began quietly.
His confusion seemed to amuse her because she looked like she was trying hard not to laugh at him. How was this funny? He had dreamed about making love to his partner but now that maybe he had...he couldn't remember? Briefly, he wondered if he'd died and gone to Hell.
" Relex, Stabler. Nothing happened last night, except for that fact you refused to release your death grip on me when you got to bed. I managed to sneak away in the middle of the night to steal your tshirt. The clothes I was wearing weren't really designed for comfortable sleepwear." she told him, the grin never leaving her face.
He took another swallow of his coffee and narrowed his eyes at her. She set him up, because she knew he'd be too drunk to remember anything. He would have believed anything she told him, because after all, it was Liv.
" You're evil, you know that Olivia? "
She just continued to grin at him, looking pleased with herself. When he refused to see the amusement in the situation, she sidled up beside him and slung an arm around his waist.
" I may be evil, but I bet I can guarantee one thing" she smirked.
He only looked at her with a scowl.
" I bet the next time you think about getting shitfaced to the point you did last night, you'll remember this morning"
He offered no response, merely raised an eyebrow. She in return dropped the smirk from her face, noticing he wasn't amused. She sighed and led him over to the stool by the island.
"Listen El, I know you're hurting, but getting drunk every night? Not the answer. You're hungover and cranky most of the time and I for one would really like my partner back. I'm here whenever you need to talk, but drowning your sorrows isn't going to help. If you want your wife back, you have to show her. "
Elliot muttered something she couldn't hear and she leaned closer to hear him...
"Can't hear you Stabler, you gotta speak up"
He turned to her with a lost expression on her face.
"I said maybe I don't want my wife back. Maybe I love my kids, but I'm not in love with my wife anymore. Maybe she wants me to choose between what I love. I'm not giving up my job, because I'd think I'd go crazy"
"Elliot, you know Kathy would never-" she started.
" She already did " he cut her off.
Olivia was silent. She had no answer to that. More than anything she wanted Elliot to be happy, but she couldn't see herself with another partner. She didn't want too. If Kathy wanted Elliot to give up his job as a cop, maybe they couldn't reconcile. All Elliot knew how to be was a cop. It wasn't just what he did, being a cop was part of who he was. If Kathy couldn't see that, they wouldn't have stayed married anyways.
With nothing else to say, Olivia just wrapped her arms around her partner and they stayed that way until they had no choice but to get ready for work.