Author's Notes: For those who haven't read it, "Fairy Godmothers, Inc." is a really funny, sweet version of the Cindella story from the perspective of the Fairy Godmother, a woman named Kate. I absolutely adored the book, but I didn't think the author went into *nearly* enough detail about the main couple's big date. I couldn't help myself from filling in a bit of the time we didn't get to hear about.
Spoilers: The date happens in the middle of the book, but I don't bring up any big plot details.
Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine.
Secret Identities
By AnitaB
It had been a simple plan. As the younger son of the royal family, there were only a small handful of people in the city who could recognize Jon Charming on sight. As long as he managed to avoid those few people, he could show Kate around the city as if he was just a normal person. How hard could it be?
He'd forgotten one thing. Apparently, the universe hated him.
"You are a very popular man," Kate murmured, laughter in her voice as she squeezed his arm sympathetically. "Who knew there were so many inventory forms and memos you needed to sign off on right this second?"
Jon sighed as he watched the last palace functionary disappear back into the crowded street. The only thing that saved all this from being a complete disaster is the fact that all of them seemed to think he was some kind of palace advisor. He wondered suddenly whether half of them even knew Rupert had a younger brother. "If I didn't know any better, I would think someone was doing it on purpose."
Kate raised an eyebrow. "I didn't meet Lawton for very long, but this doesn't really seem like his style." She paused, considering. "Unless you've really annoyed him lately…."
Jon chuckled. "No. He's too thrilled at the idea of me actually having a social life."
She smiled back at him, her expression a touch rueful. "I'm sort of afraid to tell my mother. She might have a heart attack out of sheer joy."
Jon understood exactly what she meant, but now was not the time to let her dwell on unfortunate relatives. Determined to live up to his last name at least for the moment, he swept her over to a food cart that sold spiced gingerbread bites. "I saw you eyeing these at another cart a few streets back, but we were too busy running for our lives from the palace shipping clerk. Allow me to make up for that by indulging you shamelessly with sugar."
Kate's eyes lit up. "You, sir, are a clever man."
Not quite as clever as he'd hoped, however. As they got closer to the cart, a large, incredibly starched woman practically threw herself in their way. "Just the person I was looking for," she announced, and Jon frantically looked through his mental files trying to figure out who on earth this woman was.
A second later, the question was answered when she swept a satisfied eye over Kate's fairy wings. "You're not wearing one of those ridiculous flower dresses and your clothing is far too common for you to be a fairy princess, which means you must work for Fairy Godmothers, Inc. I need to have a talk with your employer—"
Jon glanced over at Kate's frozen expression. Somehow, it was almost funny when he was being harassed, but he refused to let this woman talk to Kate like this. "Ma'am," he cut in, doing his best impression of his grandmother's "You are less than a worm" voice. From the way the woman's eyes suddenly widened, he must have done a decent job. "If you continue speaking to Her Majesty Gladiola Gloriana like that, there are laws that will allow me to execute you here and now."
There weren't, but most people didn't know a thing about fairy law. The woman gaped like a fish, caught somewhere between a choke and a sputter. "But… she…." Kate, who actually *was* the Fairy Godmothers, Inc. employee she'd been accused of being, pressed her lips together and tried not to laugh.
"You aren't worth even another second of Her Majesty's time, but I will spare one of mine to educate your feeble mind," Jon continued. "True royalty is constantly attuned to the needs of the people, and Her Majesty knew the width of her gown would put others in danger if she dressed as befitting her royal status."
The woman's expression melted into pure horror. "A fairy queen?" she gasped, immediately dropping to the ground in a ridiculously dramatic bow. "Forgive me, Your Majesty, I…."
Jon swept a finger back into the crowd. "Get out of her sight."
As the woman hurried away, Kate buried her head in his shoulder and burst out laughing. Jon, putting an arm around her, was more than happy to let her stay there as long as she wanted.
