Drip. Drip. Drip.
I watched the raindrops slowly trickle down from the roof and fall into the growing puddle of water in front of the veranda where I sat, high and dry.
Drip. Drip. Drip.
The dying sounds of the raging storm beyond the awning marked the end of the latest thunderstorm to blanket Assyria. This tropical planet has some of the most predictable storm patterns in the Fed Com, but for the past few days meteorologists have been baffled by the endless series of thunderstorms deluging our paddy fields and swelling our rivers to the flooding point. But I knew why it was raining. Surely there was only one reason.
The heavens were crying for me.
The rain and lightning had finally stopped, but the sun had not come out. It had been that way for some time now, everyday being so cloudy and gloomy. Just a week before this, it had all been so sunny and cheery. Well, as cheery as it could get. After all you don't see children playing in the streets when Mechs are stomping around spreading their power and senseless destruction. Some people would claim to be awed by their power. I would've agreed with them a week ago, but no longer. I've had enough of this senseless destruction.
I read again the letter in my hand. It had evidently been folded and unfolded many times, judging from the creases on it. The writing on the yellowed paper was mine.
Dear Jay,
I'll be coming back to see you in another few weeks! Our senior exco Colonel Ross said we're winning this war and will wipe out the remaining Hussars in another week or so. Their units have been forced into the starport, and that's the only stronghold they have left. It's fortunate that I'm only in the infantry, for I heard that the Mechwarriors will have to be the ones to do the initial push into the starport and end the Hussar's resistance. Most of us soldiers are being held back outside the starport to contain the Hussars, in case they attempt to break out in the midst of our final attack. There will certainly be a lot of deaths and sacrifices to be made. Don't worry; I will take care of myself. My squad mates have been very nice to me, watching my back all this while. When this war is over, I'll bring them to meet you!
I'm so sorry I can't write more than this, but my company sergeant is going to come around for his routine inspection. Anyhow I'll soon be back in Jabbar and we'll be together again. Oh how I miss you so much.
Your loving boyfriend,
Gregory
I felt a moistening in my eye, and blinked to clear it. How idealistic I sounded then! Just 20 years old and ready to come back from a civil war and be called a "veteran." In actual fact I had shamelessly joined the Assyria militia only a week or so before sending that letter. The glory of joining the militia and being with them when they successfully drive off the Hussars, representatives of the Ice Queen on our planet, was a chance I didn't want to pass up. After all their recent string of successes was proof of our impending victory, I told myself. Just join some unit serving far behind the front lines and I would get a free commission without shedding any blood, while being able to call myself a war veteran. That would certainly raise my status in society by several notches!
Having no qualifications to be in the Mechwarrior corps, I was assigned to the infantry division. My father knew a senior officer in the militia, a Lieutenant Jerry. Being a rookie, and also with Lieutenant Jerry's help, I was placed in a platoon of older men, meant to serve only as backup in cases of dire situations. The infantry were hardly in short supply, so I hardly saw the front, though I heard plenty of wartime stories from my squad members. Somehow it seemed so distant then, the way my friends like Harry and Tom describing the gruesome ways some of their compatriots died, squashed by Mechs or struck by a stray Gauss rifle round. I lived each day yearning to go back and see Jay again.
My eyes started to tear again. I wiped it with the back of my hand, and slowly replaced the letter in the metal box by my side. I took out another yellowing piece of paper, which was my second correspondence to Jay.
Dear Jay,
It's the sixth day of our siege, and yet the Hussars show no signs of buckling. Don't they ever give up? We've lost almost a whole company of Mechs since the initial assault on the starport. I hate to say it, but it looks like this war is going to drag on a bit longer than expected. I'm so sorry, my love. But I will make it up to you when I get back. The Hussars can't last for long. Their supplies surely will run out sooner or later, and they will surrender. Lieutenant Jerry, my company commander, has been telling us to get ready though. He tells us to expect a last ditch effort by the Hussars to break out and shatter us while we're feeling confident. Let them come! I yearn for action, after being behind the front lines for so long. I hope I can bring a nice medal to show to you. Won't that be great?
I've got to go now. Lieutenant Jerry's calling for another drill again. I guess he's really worried about our combat readiness state. Miss you!
Yours lovingly,
Gregory
I should have seen it coming. Jay had not replied any of my letters for some time. But that wasn't weird. She could've been busy. Besides that, with the planet embroiled in civil war, the postal service was severely undermanned and overtaxed. I thought that I would probably get the letters later, or maybe Jay hadn't even got a letter from me yet at that time. I found lots of reasons to quiet my niggling doubts.
There was a last letter in that box. I gingerly took it out, and read it silently as well.
Jay my love,
I don't know if our militia can take this any longer. We may be the ones besieging the starport but each time the Hussars attempt to break out, we seem to lose more and more ground. We don't even have enough Mechs to guard the defences. Yesterday the Hussars succeeded in wiping out Alpha Company's C&C when one of their Catapults made a successful suicidal attack at their command bunker. One of our good friends, John (from primary school, remember?), was in there at that time. I couldn't recognise him or any of my other friends in the bunker after that.
I can't wait to get back to you. It seems that this war is getting so bloody. I have yet to face any action but now I'm not so eager to do so. I might never survive my first battle. Oh how I wish this would end now.
Yours lovingly,
Gregory
I grasped the letter in my hands, crushing it in my hold till it was badly crumpled. Then I fumbled in my pants pocket for a lighter, and with my hands shaking, I lit the letter. The yellowing paper burned well, even in such humid conditions. The paper was tossed into the box, where it set fire to the other two letters. The fire slowly consumed the love letters I sent to Jay.
Staring into the fire, I recollected the events after the last letter I sent to her. The flicker of the flames reminded me of the flash of gunfire and explosions.