Readers! Hi! This is a story born from my desire to write a Ponytail!Zuko/Katara story, because while I love love love Zuko during season three, there isn't enough season 1 Zutara to go around. And while season 1 Zutara comes at a price (no Toph sniff sniff), it has that more forbidden romance thing that I just really enjoy. I don't really know where I'm going to go with this yet, but here's the first chapter! It should be a fun and angsty adventure. (Also I don't own this, although it would be really awesome if I did)

Katara couldn't even really explain how it had begun. She supposed that somewhere, along the way, there had been enough exchanged glances and snide remarks that surmised in what could be considered tension, but it never seemed like it was enough to start...whatever this was.

The first time he captured her, he tied her against a tree and she told him to jump in the river. The last time, the most recent time, he'd slammed her against a tree and they'd jumped in the river together.

She'd heard of hate turning to lust, but she couldn't really be sure she'd ever hated him. Zuko had always been a tad overzealous in his attempts to capture the Avatar, and he strode around the place with this sense of grandeur, but Katara had always seen through it. She couldn't have hated him, not really. He was too visibly broken inside to hate.

Whatever it was, hate or pity, dislike or envy, Katara had found herself running to him every chance he got. Why does he keep capturing you, Aang always wondered, what does he want?

Katara always lied and said that Zuko probably figured capturing her was the easiest way to lure Aang within his grasp. But that wasn't true. Zuko still had his eyes on the Avatar, Katara knew that, but that desire seemed to have been compromised for others. Nearly every week he would show up, surrounded by fire and smoke, and seconds later, Katara would be gone. Maybe Aang and Sokka were suspicious. Maybe Katara didn't care.

On no account will I betray Aang to you, she told him the first time, when his breath was tickling her neck and his hands, his hands were running up and down her body. You're acting like I don't already know that, Zuko had said in her ear, his voice raspy and low. She had trembled then, his voice always did that to her. Especially when he leaned so close that his lips tickled her ear, and when lips turned to teeth.

The way he kissed her had been so hungry, so fervent, it seemed to Katara that he needed this more than she could imagine. He was always a little rough with her, but Katara didn't mind because it felt good. Whether they were wrapped up in the silk sheets of his bed or on the cold, hard ground, it all felt the same. Amazing.

That's how it had started; lust, passion, what Katara could only call a steamy affair. But somewhere along the line, it had turned into something different than that. She started playing with his hair when he was lying down, he started poking her in the side so she would snort and make funny noises. Somewhere, along the line, Katara and Zuko had started to care about each other, which confused Katara as much as it made her feel elated.

Zuko was as conflicted about it as she was, she knew. There was such a war going on inside of him, and it filled him with so much anger. That's when he would capture her, when he was furious, when steam was hissing out of his ears and his skin was burning like fire. And then Katara would kiss him, and she could feel his anger melt away, she could feel that war settle down for only a moment, and Zuko would collapse in her arms. Thank you, he would murmur, and Katara would rub his shoulders and kiss him until he felt better.

That particular night, Katara had been charged with the first watch. She huddled close to the fire, wrapped up in her Water Tribe coat, wanting nothing more than to close her eyes and go to sleep. It had been a long day, Aang had insisted on stopping here and there and everywhere, and Sokka had (politely) requested that she mend all his pants, and all the while, the Fire Nation was on their trail.

Katara still hated the Fire Nation. Nothing had changed about that. Her fingers raised to her mother's necklace, and she tried to displace the images of her mother being killed from her memory. Soft footsteps padded up to her.

"You shouldn't be here," Katara whispered, looking at Zuko, who stood over her. He sat down, ignoring her. Katara scooted over to him.

"We're camping nearby. I just wanted to see you," he said quietly, taking a lock of hair in his fingers. Katara just nodded and rested against his shoulder. She watched the fire snap and play at the air, it's tendrils curling into smoke.

There were days when she hated fire.

Katara and Zuko had mutually agreed that as far as they were concerned, there was no war when they were together. They would forget about the war, the opposite sides they fought on, and the matter of the Avatar. But tonight, it was pressing too heavily on Katara's mind to forget.

"The Fire Nation took my mother from me," she said quietly, watching the fire still. "I watched a man...I watched him do it."

"Katara..." Zuko took her hand. "I didn't know."

"We're not on the same side."

Zuko didn't say anything. But Katara pressed on, whispering fervently, her breath visible in the cold night.

"We're playing a game that we're not skilled enough to play," she said, "and we're going to pay for it. What happens when the inevitable climactic battle comes? When I choose my side and you choose yours? What happens when I'm next to Aang, fighting your father? What do we do when we face each other in the end?"

The words hung in the air, shriveling and turning into ice. Zuko's face remained a mask.

"It's not the end yet."

"It'll come," Katara insisted. She found herself clutching him, burying her face in shoulder, taking in the smell of his musk. "I don't want to lose you," she whispered, "but..."

"But I'm the bad guy," Zuko finished. Katara didn't say anything.

It was always going to get complicated.

"But you're not a bad guy, Zuko," she told him, "you aren't. I know you aren't."

"Maybe."

Zuko's ponytail tickled her ear as it moved in the wind. He sighed. Something within Sokka's tent rustled, and Katara and Zuko jumped, but Sokka didn't come out.

Katara didn't want Zuko to leave, of course. He didn't seem to want to leave either, but he stood up all the same, Katara clinging to his arm.

"Take me again," she suggested, "we can go back to your camp, we can say that I was spying on you, or something, I..."

"I already captured you this week," Zuko said, "I can't do it again. Uncle is already starting to suspect something. He wants to know why I don't just capture the Avatar, or your brother." He paused. "I want to though. I want to take you back with me."

"But you can't."

"No."

Katara, still clutching his arm, stayed rooted to the spot as Zuko tried to walk away.

"Zuko?"

He looked at her, that ever burning conflict flickering in his eyes. I could say it, Katara thought, I could tell him how much I love him.

He seemed to know what she was thinking, because a sad smile crossed his face.

"You don't need to say it," he said quietly, brushing a thumb over her cheek.

"I do, though."

"I know," he paused. "I do too."

Katara flung her arms around him, and Zuko held her, her head pressed under his chin.

"If there wasn't a war, would we be together?" Katara asked him.

"If there wasn't a war, we probably never would have met," Zuko said in a low voice. Katara knew he was right.

"The war will end, though," she said. "And then?"

"It depends."

"On what?"

"On which side wins."

Heavy hearted, Katara watched Zuko walk away. He passed into the woods and disappeared from her sight, and Katara felt a tear roll down her cheek. This is silly, she thought, wiping it away. It was never supposed to be about love.

"Katara?" Katara turned around and saw Aang standing behind her. "Were you talking to someone?"

"Me? No, just...myself," she laughed nervously. "Are you taking over the watch?"

Aang nodded, but looked at her curiously.

"Are you okay?"

Katara paused.

"How long do you think the war is going to last?" she asked eventually. Aang sighed and shrugged.

"I don't know. Avatar Roku said I had to defeat Ozai before the end of the summer. So I guess until then."

"And you think defeating Ozai will end the war?"

"I mean..." Aang rubbed the back of his neck. "I hope so. Unless someone just as evil takes over as Fire Lord. But I don't think anyone is as evil as Ozai."

"No," Katara agreed half heartedly, "you're right." Zuko was in line for the throne, she knew, but he'd told her all about his sister, who had the same potential for evil and just as much potential to surpass his right. "Do you think...do you think everyone has good in them?"

"I'm a monk, of couse I think that," Aang said earnestly. "Sometimes it's buried down...way way way way down...but everyone has good in them." He smiled at Katara, and she smiled back. "You should go to bed. I'll take the watch now." Aang sat down and crossed his legs in a meditation pose. A little reassured, Katara went back to her tent.

Her dreams were of fire.

Thanks for reading and being awesome in general!