He felt a breeze as he sat on the ground waiting for her. He smiled to
himself at what his friends would say if they knew he was hiding in the
bushes at 3am for a girl. Him! The one who would never fall in love.
That's what he had thought, anyway. But she had changed him. It had
shocked him when he first realised. He refused to speak to her. How could
he fall in love? With her? It had never been like that between them,
never.
Everything had changed a few months before. He started to see her in a different light, and it had scared him. He avoided her for two weeks, until she cornered him, and demanded to know what was going on. So he told her. She said nothing, just turned and ran away. He chased after her, and when he caught up, he kissed her. And she had kissed him back! Ever since then they'd been having this secret relationship. He wanted to tell someone, was desperate to tell someone. She wouldn't let him, knowing the trouble it would cause if people found out about the two of them.
He looked over at the house, waiting for her to come out. It was hard for her to get away, to get out to see him. And he had become more demanding, he needed to see her more often. They had become reckless, and had nearly got caught earlier in the week. That had brought home the reality of what was going on. How would he explain this?
He shook the negative thoughts out of his head, and looked up at the clouds. He was hoping that it wouldn't rain, but a huge grey cloud was heading his way. Now that really would spoil his night. She wouldn't come out if it rained, and he had to see her, he had to. He made up his mind not to leave until she came out.
He turned towards the house as he heard someone coming towards him.
"Jeff?"
She pushed her way through the bushes to him, and sat down.
"Have you been waiting long?"
"About 30 minuets."
"Sorry baby! I had to.."
He cut her off with a passionate kiss, pulling her body towards him, running his fingers through her hair. He lay back on the ground, and pulled her on top of him, his mind running wild with his thoughts of her. He broke off the kiss, and looked into her eyes.
"Let's go back to mine."
There was a pause, and she appeared to be thinking about it. His eyes lit up in hope that she would agree to go with him, a hope that was dashed by the expression that was now on her face.
"Don't be silly. You know I can't leave."
"Why not?"
"You know why. What would happen if he woke up, and realised I wasn't there?"
"I don't care. I need you, I love you, and I have to show you how much."
"You can show me here."
He raised an eyebrow, and smiled at the suggestion, pulling at the straps on her top. She blushed as she realised what she had said, and pushed his hands away.
"That's not what I meant," she said with a smile.
"It was a good idea though."
He pulled her into his arms once again, and was shocked at how cold her skin was. He pulled his jacket off, and wrapped it round her, despite her protests that she wasn't cold.
"You said one of things you loved about me was that I'm a gentleman, so stop arguing, and let me be one."
She smiled, and leant in to him, to rest her head on his shoulder. He put his arm around her, and closed his eyes, just enjoying the feeling of having her close. He wished that they could stay like that forever, with no worries about the consequences of their actions, or who was going to get hurt. But that wasn't possible, and he knew things couldn't go on the way they were for much longer.
"What's wrong?"
He opened his eyes and looked down at her.
"I love you."
"I love you too. Now tell me what's wrong."
"What's wrong is I have to go home alone tonight. What's wrong is I have everything I've ever wanted in my arms right now, and yet, you're not mine. I can't go on like this, I need us to be together always. You are my soul, and without you I'm nothing."
She cupped his face with her hands, and kissed him gently.
"Don't upset yourself, lover. Things are like this because they have to be. If it was easy to just pack up my stuff and leave, I would. But this is not just about you and me. For us to be together, we'd have to hurt him. For us to be together, we'd have to lose everything else, our friends. Our families. Once we'd made the decision, there would be no going back. They would be lost forever. And I don't think you could cope with that."
"So what? We just stay like this?"
"For now. Things will work themselves out in the end. If it's meant to be, it will be."
"It's meant to be. We're meant to be."
"Then just wait patiently. I know it's hard, because it's hard for me too. There are times when all I want to do is be with you, to feel your arms around me, and to hear you tell me you love me. But we have to wait."
He looked down at the ground, and nodded. He was hurting because he couldn't be with her now, but he knew she was right. The loss of his friends and family would be as bad to him as losing her. He sighed as he realised that things were going to get a lot harder, and that one day he may have to choose between them and her. Or possibly lose both.
He looked up at the sky, which had started to clear. The clouds were now heading away from them, so they could see the stars.
"Let's look for a shooting star, so that I can wish for us to be happy together."
She smiled at him, and looked up at the sky. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a light come on in the house, and looked round. He looked round also, just in time to see the back door open.
A man stepped out on to the patio, and began to look around the garden.
She turned back to her lover, and gave him back his jacket.
"Jeff, I've got to go. I love you."
"I love you too."
He kissed her hand, and she smiled and quickly kissed him on the cheek. Then they heard the call from the patio.
"Amy?"
She smiled at her lover, and then pushed her way out of the bushes.
"Over here."
"What are you doing out here?" he asked her.
"I couldn't sleep, and it was so hot in the house I decided to come outside and look at the stars."
"Well, come back inside now, it's getting chilly and you might catch a cold."
They went inside, and shut the door.
He stayed outside at the end of the garden for awhile, watching their silhouettes walk up the stairs, seeing him hold her hand as he led the way. He watched as the lights went off in the house, and he saw his rival look out of the bedroom window. It was as if he was staring straight at him. He couldn't be, though. If he had known about him and Amy, he would have killed him by now. He loved Amy, worshipped the ground she walked on, and he would kill anyone who tried to take her from him. Anyone. Even his little brother.
He watched as Matt gave one final glance over the garden, and then pulled the curtains shut. The house was completely dark now. Amy and Matt were in bed again, and he was alone, sitting in a bush at the end of the garden. He sighed to himself as he got up and headed home. The dark grey rain cloud was overhead again, and it started to rain. He didn't hurry though, the rain fitted in with his mood. Seeing Matt had been hard for him, because he loved his older brother, and didn't want to hurt him. There had been a time in his life where he couldn't imagine doing anything to hurt Matt, but that time was gone, and he realised that soon he would have to make a choice. Matt or Amy.
Amy. The woman of his dreams. It took him years to realise it, but now that he had, he couldn't remember what his life was like before they got together. He thought about what it would be like if he gave her up, and felt pain in his chest as his heart began to ache for her. He missed her so much, and he'd only seen her ten minuets ago. The whole situation was unbearable: be with the woman he loved, and lose his brother, or give her up so that Matt stays happy.
He decided not to think about it anymore, as it ruined the good mood he had been in earlier when Amy came out. He walked up the steps to his front door, completely soaked by the rain. When he got in, he went straight to bed, and not caring about his wet clothes, crawled under the covers. Still feeling depressed, he began to think of when he would see Amy again, in the hope that it would cheer him up. They were all flying out to Los Angeles later on for a show tomorrow night, so he'd see her at the airport in about nine hours. Nine hours was a long time though, and he couldn't even dream the time away as he had too much on his mind to be able to sleep. He watched the clock, and the time ticking away, but it seemed that time was against him right then, as the minuets appeared to be going more slowly than usual. He tried to focus on the ticking clock, which was somewhat comforting to him, its regular sound proving that time hadn't slowed down. He listened to each tick, hearing each second pass by, and then he suddenly knew how he would get through the time until he could be with her again. He would count the seconds.
Everything had changed a few months before. He started to see her in a different light, and it had scared him. He avoided her for two weeks, until she cornered him, and demanded to know what was going on. So he told her. She said nothing, just turned and ran away. He chased after her, and when he caught up, he kissed her. And she had kissed him back! Ever since then they'd been having this secret relationship. He wanted to tell someone, was desperate to tell someone. She wouldn't let him, knowing the trouble it would cause if people found out about the two of them.
He looked over at the house, waiting for her to come out. It was hard for her to get away, to get out to see him. And he had become more demanding, he needed to see her more often. They had become reckless, and had nearly got caught earlier in the week. That had brought home the reality of what was going on. How would he explain this?
He shook the negative thoughts out of his head, and looked up at the clouds. He was hoping that it wouldn't rain, but a huge grey cloud was heading his way. Now that really would spoil his night. She wouldn't come out if it rained, and he had to see her, he had to. He made up his mind not to leave until she came out.
He turned towards the house as he heard someone coming towards him.
"Jeff?"
She pushed her way through the bushes to him, and sat down.
"Have you been waiting long?"
"About 30 minuets."
"Sorry baby! I had to.."
He cut her off with a passionate kiss, pulling her body towards him, running his fingers through her hair. He lay back on the ground, and pulled her on top of him, his mind running wild with his thoughts of her. He broke off the kiss, and looked into her eyes.
"Let's go back to mine."
There was a pause, and she appeared to be thinking about it. His eyes lit up in hope that she would agree to go with him, a hope that was dashed by the expression that was now on her face.
"Don't be silly. You know I can't leave."
"Why not?"
"You know why. What would happen if he woke up, and realised I wasn't there?"
"I don't care. I need you, I love you, and I have to show you how much."
"You can show me here."
He raised an eyebrow, and smiled at the suggestion, pulling at the straps on her top. She blushed as she realised what she had said, and pushed his hands away.
"That's not what I meant," she said with a smile.
"It was a good idea though."
He pulled her into his arms once again, and was shocked at how cold her skin was. He pulled his jacket off, and wrapped it round her, despite her protests that she wasn't cold.
"You said one of things you loved about me was that I'm a gentleman, so stop arguing, and let me be one."
She smiled, and leant in to him, to rest her head on his shoulder. He put his arm around her, and closed his eyes, just enjoying the feeling of having her close. He wished that they could stay like that forever, with no worries about the consequences of their actions, or who was going to get hurt. But that wasn't possible, and he knew things couldn't go on the way they were for much longer.
"What's wrong?"
He opened his eyes and looked down at her.
"I love you."
"I love you too. Now tell me what's wrong."
"What's wrong is I have to go home alone tonight. What's wrong is I have everything I've ever wanted in my arms right now, and yet, you're not mine. I can't go on like this, I need us to be together always. You are my soul, and without you I'm nothing."
She cupped his face with her hands, and kissed him gently.
"Don't upset yourself, lover. Things are like this because they have to be. If it was easy to just pack up my stuff and leave, I would. But this is not just about you and me. For us to be together, we'd have to hurt him. For us to be together, we'd have to lose everything else, our friends. Our families. Once we'd made the decision, there would be no going back. They would be lost forever. And I don't think you could cope with that."
"So what? We just stay like this?"
"For now. Things will work themselves out in the end. If it's meant to be, it will be."
"It's meant to be. We're meant to be."
"Then just wait patiently. I know it's hard, because it's hard for me too. There are times when all I want to do is be with you, to feel your arms around me, and to hear you tell me you love me. But we have to wait."
He looked down at the ground, and nodded. He was hurting because he couldn't be with her now, but he knew she was right. The loss of his friends and family would be as bad to him as losing her. He sighed as he realised that things were going to get a lot harder, and that one day he may have to choose between them and her. Or possibly lose both.
He looked up at the sky, which had started to clear. The clouds were now heading away from them, so they could see the stars.
"Let's look for a shooting star, so that I can wish for us to be happy together."
She smiled at him, and looked up at the sky. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a light come on in the house, and looked round. He looked round also, just in time to see the back door open.
A man stepped out on to the patio, and began to look around the garden.
She turned back to her lover, and gave him back his jacket.
"Jeff, I've got to go. I love you."
"I love you too."
He kissed her hand, and she smiled and quickly kissed him on the cheek. Then they heard the call from the patio.
"Amy?"
She smiled at her lover, and then pushed her way out of the bushes.
"Over here."
"What are you doing out here?" he asked her.
"I couldn't sleep, and it was so hot in the house I decided to come outside and look at the stars."
"Well, come back inside now, it's getting chilly and you might catch a cold."
They went inside, and shut the door.
He stayed outside at the end of the garden for awhile, watching their silhouettes walk up the stairs, seeing him hold her hand as he led the way. He watched as the lights went off in the house, and he saw his rival look out of the bedroom window. It was as if he was staring straight at him. He couldn't be, though. If he had known about him and Amy, he would have killed him by now. He loved Amy, worshipped the ground she walked on, and he would kill anyone who tried to take her from him. Anyone. Even his little brother.
He watched as Matt gave one final glance over the garden, and then pulled the curtains shut. The house was completely dark now. Amy and Matt were in bed again, and he was alone, sitting in a bush at the end of the garden. He sighed to himself as he got up and headed home. The dark grey rain cloud was overhead again, and it started to rain. He didn't hurry though, the rain fitted in with his mood. Seeing Matt had been hard for him, because he loved his older brother, and didn't want to hurt him. There had been a time in his life where he couldn't imagine doing anything to hurt Matt, but that time was gone, and he realised that soon he would have to make a choice. Matt or Amy.
Amy. The woman of his dreams. It took him years to realise it, but now that he had, he couldn't remember what his life was like before they got together. He thought about what it would be like if he gave her up, and felt pain in his chest as his heart began to ache for her. He missed her so much, and he'd only seen her ten minuets ago. The whole situation was unbearable: be with the woman he loved, and lose his brother, or give her up so that Matt stays happy.
He decided not to think about it anymore, as it ruined the good mood he had been in earlier when Amy came out. He walked up the steps to his front door, completely soaked by the rain. When he got in, he went straight to bed, and not caring about his wet clothes, crawled under the covers. Still feeling depressed, he began to think of when he would see Amy again, in the hope that it would cheer him up. They were all flying out to Los Angeles later on for a show tomorrow night, so he'd see her at the airport in about nine hours. Nine hours was a long time though, and he couldn't even dream the time away as he had too much on his mind to be able to sleep. He watched the clock, and the time ticking away, but it seemed that time was against him right then, as the minuets appeared to be going more slowly than usual. He tried to focus on the ticking clock, which was somewhat comforting to him, its regular sound proving that time hadn't slowed down. He listened to each tick, hearing each second pass by, and then he suddenly knew how he would get through the time until he could be with her again. He would count the seconds.