Confusion…

Disclamer: I do not own anything except my plot… which is pretty much like everyone else's plot… xP

Authors note: this is my first fic ever!!! ^__^ plz be nice… the characters are very OOC… and plz note that this has nothing to do with the game Kingdom Hearts except for the characters… yep… it's a saaaad excuse for a story…_

I am sitting here trying to concentrate on the book I am trying to read but I cant. My mind wont let me take my mind off him. Him and his sweet smile, his silky silver hair, and his beautiful sea green eyes. I cursed myself for thinking about him in that way!

We were just friends!!! Friends. And that's all that I wanted to be…. Right? I mean… of course I think he is gorgeous…. But what sane person doesn't?!

My mind kept wandering away from my homework… and back to him. I couldn't help it! Isn't that what everyone is like? Yearning for things that they can never have? It's only human…. But it isn't normal to feel that way about your best friend… but he was so sweet at school!

I had gotten into a little accident and had to stay home for the last week, and every day he would come over and bring my homework to me, he would help me study, he would help with any trouble I had. Today I went back to school and he was there to help me the whole way! He even helped my carry my millions of books! (Though I felt I didn't really need help with them.) Then after school he walked with me all the way home… though his house is a few blocks away from mine. He helped me up the stairs and into my bed being very careful not to hurt my sore ribs.

He was about to leave… but I asked him to stay… I didn't want to be alone since my parents were gone. He said of course he would, he could never leave a friend in need! I was glad I would miss him too much if he left.

I asked him to help me with my homework (it had grown a routine) then when we were don't with that he would sit with me and we would talk, or play video games, or something.

I was too tired to get out of my bed and get the controllers for the game so we talked. We stayed like that for a while, two hours in fact. We talked and talked until we got onto an interesting subject….

He asked me "Sora? Do you think it is wrong for a guy to like a guy?" I was a little taken aback to tell you the truth… but I soon recovered from the shock of that question… I had never really thought of Riku as being gay. Though ruffled I remained relatively composed and replied " I believe love knows know gender if that is what you mean." As calmly as I could.

He looked a little relieved for some strange reason I couldn't comprehend at the moment…then… he leaned down and kissed me… I remember thinking 'what is he doing?!!?' but then my mind gave in to all rational thinking. The kiss wasn't demanding or rough or anything… just firm and sweet… I felt his tongue begging for entrance. I hastily complied and parted my lips slightly. His tongue explored my mouth. I moaned into the kiss, it just felt so right! Slowly I felt myself being gently lowered onto down onto my bed until I was completely on my back, my arms around his neck and his tongue still in my mouth (*blush*) he tasted so delicious spicy yet still sweet… I couldn't get enough… but we had to part for air.

When we pulled apart our position fully registered to my brain and my eyes widened. 'What was I doing?!? And with my best friend too!!' I thought. He seemed to be thinking the same thing, because he quickly got off me (to both my displeasure and relief)

"I'm sorry" he mumbled as I sat up, clutching my aching ribs. His eyes widened considerably and he helped me up gently raising me into a sitting position. "Um…. I-I hafta go…." He said and ran out of my room, leaving me sitting on my bed in shock.

Well that pretty much is where I am now though; I am not as shocked anymore… I'm just sorta confused… I can't figure out what I am supposed to consider him any more… a friend… or …more? Well I guess I will never know… being that I doubt he will want to talk to me…. Or so it seems…

Gawd I'm so confused…

Okay… well that's it… my first fic ever… funny… I thought it would be a YGO fic… *shrugs* oh well! There is still time for one of those if I get positive feedback from this fic!! ^_^

(plz note this isn't my usual writing style… so I dunno… O.o;;)