Forgiveness
Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon, and I'm not making any money from this fic
Summary: A Takeru/Ken fic. Takeru and Ken are together, but Takeru kisses Kari, an action which really hurts Ken
It's all my fault, Takeru thought to himself, staring at Ken's pale face. The fight, the argument... And now this. Ken's in hospital in critical condition, and its all my fault...
Takeru buried his face in his hands, and sobbed bitterly. If only he hadn't given in to his feelings for Hikari. He'd been dating Ken for ages, and now... this. He'd kissed Hikari, and Ken had been so mad... He had refused to talk to Takeru at all. He'd run off, and Takeru had run after him, and then, the car had come...
Hikari was standing behind Takeru in the hospital room. "Takeru?" she whispered. "I'm sorry."
Takeru wiped at the tears streaming down his face. "It wasn't your fault," he replied in a voice thick with emotion. "It was mine. I loved... love Ken. I guess I was just confused with my feelings for you."
"When he wakes up," Hikari said. "I'm sure that he'll forgive you."
"I don't deserve forgiveness," Takeru whispered, staring at his love's pale body.
"Takeru, forgiveness is not earned or deserved... It is a gift."
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Going home that evening, Takeru thought about Hikari's words. All of his friends had been so supportive about Ken's accident. Even Daisuke, in a Daisuke kind of way. They'd all done their best to cheer Takeru up. But Takeru's heart was filled with so much sadness that nothing could get through to him, not even Daisuke's silliness.
Takeru wondered briefly if it was possible to die of a broken heart. What if Ken doesn't wake up? he thought. Or, what if he wakes up, but doesn't forgive me? What do I do then? I know that I'll just want to die.
Takeru gulped back tears as he entered his home, and attempted to cheer himself up. His brother was coming round that evening, and Yamato could always tell when his younger brother was unhappy about something. But Takeru didn't want to talk about his problems to anyone. They were his problems. Not anyone else's. Not even his brother's.
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Ken was in a place of pure evil and hatred. Part of him knew that he was in hospital from a car accident, but that was a very small part. The rest of him was swamped with hatred for Takeru.
How could he do this to me?! Ken yelled silently. He was filled with bitterness, and it was almost like the Kaiser was returning.
"Ken-chan?"
Ken spun round. He found himself in a place that looked remarkably like the Digiworld. And there was...
"Wormon!" Ken gasped, his eyes filling with tears.
"Ken-chan," Wormon greeted him sadly.
"But... You're dead!" Ken cried. He found that he couldn't move to go and hug his Digimon to himself and never let him go.
"Ken-chan, your hatred of Takeru is holding you back," Wormon said. "Your hatred is like chains. They will never release you unless you forgive him and stop hating him."
Ken looked down at himself, and saw that Wormon was right. Black chains were wrapped around his arms and legs, holding him still.
Ken looked up again. "Wormon... How do I release myself from these chains?"
"Forgiveness, like I said," Wormon answered swiftly. "Until you forgive Takeru, the chains will remain around you. You will be a slave to hatred and evil, just like you were as the Digimon Kaiser."
Ken looked away, and Wormon sighed. "Think about it, Ken," he whispered.
"What do you know?" Ken demanded cruelly. "You're dead! You can't know anything about what's going to happen!"
"But I do, Ken," Wormon whispered, closing his eyes. "You are my Digidestined partner. I know you better than I know anyone else. But then, that was why you were so horrible to me as the Digimon Emperor, wasn't it? I was the only one who remembered who you really were. And you didn't want anyone to know your weakness."
Ken stared at Wormon. "I..." he began.
Wormon and the rest of the place started to fade, becoming replaced by a hospital room. Ken opened his eyes, and blinked.
"He's awake!" a doctor gasped.
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Takeru stared at Yamato. "What?!"
"I said, what's wrong?" Yamato sighed. "I'm your brother, Takeru. I know when you're unhappy and scared. You can't hide your true feelings from me."
Takeru shook his head. "Nothing's wrong," he whispered.
Yamato hugged his brother. "Takeru, I know that Ken is in hospital from a car accident. I'm guessing that you think, for some reason, that its your fault. Am I right?"
Takeru looked at the ground, and everything came pouring out. About how he had kissed Hikari, and Ken had found them... Ken yelling at him, running out of the building, and Takeru chasing him... And then, the drunk driver.
Yamato looked down at his brother. "Takeru," he said quietly. "That wasn't your fault. And, once Ken is awake, I'm sure that he will understand, and will forgive you. He was just mad at you then."
Takeru said nothing, but tears started to form in his eyes, and spill over his cheeks. He couldn't stop himself from crying.
Yamato swore softly. But, before he could do anything, the phone rang. He picked it up, and listened for a moment, his eyes growing really wide. "Yeah, sure," he said into the phone. "I'll tell him." He put it down.
Takeru wiped a hand across his eyes. "Who was it?" he wanted to know.
"The hospital," Yamato answered. "They said that Ken has woken up."
Takeru stared at his brother. "Woken... up?" he repeated, his eyes lighting up. But then, his face fell again.
"What is it?" Yamato asked, concerned.
"I don't want to go to the hospital," Takeru replied. "Ken won't want to see me. I know he won't."
"You can't know for sure, Takeru," Yamato said. "If you'd like, I'll drive you round, and wait for you to come out again."
Takeru hesitated, then nodded. "I'd feel really bad if I didn't go. Thanks, Yamato. I guess I'll never know how Ken feels if I don't go..."
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Hikari, Daisuke, Miyako, and Iori were in Ken's hospital room. "How are you feeling, Ken?" Daisuke asked.
"Better," Ken replied wryly. Then, he stiffened as he saw someone standing in the doorway of the hospital room, twisting his hat nervously in his hands. "Takeru..." he hissed.
Takeru looked nervous. "Ken," he greeted his former boyfriend.
"Get. Out." Ken's voice was calm, but he was obviously angry.
Takeru continued to twist the hat in his hands. "Ken, I..." he began.
Ken pulled himself up so that he was in a sitting position, and pointed at the door. "Out. Now," he said coldly. "Or I'll call the doctors and nurses, and tell them to drag you out!"
Takeru hesitated. Then, his shoulders slumped and shaking, he turned and walked out, not even attempting to defend himself.
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Takeru felt as though his heart was breaking in two. Again, he wondered if it was possible to die from a broken heart. He certainly felt as if he was dying.
But why should I just feel like I'm dying? Takeru wondered. I might as well kill myself and end it all.
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Yamato wasn't home when Takeru got in from school, and neither was Takeru's mother. The Keeper of Hope took a sharp knife out of the kitchen drawer, then trudged upstairs to his room where his computer was. He took his Digivice out. "Digiport, open!" he commanded.
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Angemon flew around desperately, then finally found Hikari and Gatomon sitting on a park bench with Hikari throwing bread for the birds.
Hikari looked up. "Hello, Angemon," she smiled. "Where's Takeru?"
"I was hoping that you would be able to tell me that," Angemon replied. "I can't find him anywhere, and I'm really worried."
Hikari's expression instantly turned worried. Takeru wouldn't try to kill himself... Would he? Surely even he would not be that stupid/ Then again, Ken had been mad at him... Perhaps Takeru had given in completely to despair, losing all of his hope. After all, take away someone's hope, and what have you got left? Despair. And despair leads to depression, and depression can lead to suicide...
"I'll go and get the others, including Ken," Hikari decided.
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Takeru stared into the distance, biting his lip. He was wondering where he should cut himself with the knife to kill himself. His throat might be better, but it was difficult to cut himself properly on the neck without a mirror, and he hadn't thought to bring one.
"Takeru?"
His name was spoken softly. Not shouted, as one might have expected. But the deep hurt in the voice made Takeru pause and turn round to see who had followed him into the Digiworld.
Ken was staring at Takeru. "Takeru," he repeated softly.
"What are you doing here, Ken?" Takeru wanted to know.
Ken stepped forward and gently took the knife out of Takeru's hands, and then flung it to one side, not taking his eyes off Takeru's face for a second.
There were all sorts of things that Takeru wanted to ask Ken. But the only thing that came out when he opened his mouth was, "How did you find me?"
Ken looked at the ground. "Hikari said that Angemon was worried about you," he explained. "She also said that you were... confused when you kissed her."
Takeru stared at Ken, confused. "What are you saying?" he demanded.
Ken lifted his head, and stared straight at Takeru, who dropped his own eyes in turn. Smiling faintly, Ken stepped forward, put his arms around Takeru, and kissed him softly. "That I forgive you," he replied.
Takeru relaxed into Ken's embrace and kiss. Tears fell from his eyes. "I'm sorry," he sobbed.
"Sh. Its ok." Ken stroked Takeru's cheek, and kissed him again.
Takeru suddenly stiffened. "Is that a Digiegg?" he asked.
Ken turned round. Yes. There was a Digiegg just behind him. And it looked strangely familiar...
Ken walked over to the Digiegg. Just as he got near it, it hatched to reveal Leafmon, Wormon's baby form.
"Leafmon!" Ken gasped.
Leafmon smiled. "Hi, Ken," he said. "Because you let go of your hatred for Takeru and forgave him, you allowed me to be hatched again..."
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