A/N: this is my first furuba fanfic! please review with any comments/criticisms/concerns/questions/etc... it takes place in volume 1, when tohru goes to her grandpa's house.. oh, and i'd originally written the lyrics in color, but obviously this is black and white, so i had to play around with the formatting a little. basically, whenever the lyrics are just italicized, it's yuki's POV, and when they're bold, it's kyo's. at the end it switches to tohru's POV, and i marked that in the story.
Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket - that belongs to Natsuki Takaya. "When You're Gone" is a song by Avril Lavigne.
When You're Gone
She was gone. She was gone and she wasn't coming back…
I always needed time on my own
Yuki Sohma sat alone in his garden, staring at the strawberry plants. She was the only one who believed in me, he thought. She was the only one who tried to understand. No one else ever got it – that I don't know what to do around people. I never have. But she didn't care – to her, it didn't matter that I'm shy.
I never thought I'd
Need you there when I cry.
Kyo Sohma sat on the roof, head in hands. Why am I so mad? She's just a girl. I barely even knew her. So why- why do I care so much now that she's gone? I don't need her! I don't need anyone!
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
For so long, he'd had no one to confide in. Sure, he was popular, but for what? Because he was "cute"? She'd been the only one who had seen past that, who had tried to dig down to find the real Yuki. And she would never know how much she had helped him.
And the bed where you lie
Is made up on your side.
He'd walked past her room early that morning on his way to the roof and, despite himself, had been shocked to see the bed empty. Then it had hit him: she's gone. If he hadn't been so… so sad, he would've laughed at the fact that she'd made her bed and cleaned the room anyway.
When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
He had watched her go even though he knew it would hurt. She'd tried to leave at night, when no one would notice, but he'd been watching through the window. He'd noticed, too, that while her steps were slow and painful, she didn't look back. Not once.
Do you see how much I need you right now?
Why? Why did her absence affect him so much? When he'd woken up that morning and remembered she was gone, he'd gotten so mad for no reason. Even now, lying alone on the roof, he expected to any moment see her bright smile pop up over the edge, to hear her kind, soft voice as she asked him what was the matter. Somehow, that always made everything better.
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
I don't know why… but her not being here hurts. It's stupid, I know, but I have this pain in my heart that feels like I've lost something important.
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
Before everything had started, before she'd come to live with them, he'd seen her at school, observed her happy face as she laughed with her friends. Then he'd found out the truth… She was no longer just a girl – she was his friend. He knew he'd still see her face at school, but it wouldn't be the same.
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
Without her, I don't know what will happen… She helped me start to find myself. Without her, I think I may lose myself again…
And make it okay
He remembered all those times she'd come to talk to him after a fight, how she'd genuinely try to understand him, and how no matter what was wrong, she always said exactly what he needed to hear.
I miss you
I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do
Reminds me of you
He couldn't bear to sit on the roof any longer. His mind kept flashing back to the other day when she'd come to see him after Kagura had stormed into the house and caused so many problems. He blushed as he remembered the way he'd talked about Shishou, the way he'd grinned as he described his training, the pathetic attempt at martial arts she'd shown him to prove he wasn't boring her. No, the roof held too many memories of her… He jumped off, landed with catlike perfection, and began to walk, not exactly sure where he was going.
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you
I love the things that you do
He couldn't stand it for one more minute. Usually the garden was his refuge, the place he went where he could just sit and think. After a while he always felt a little better. But he'd been sitting here for hours, and nothing had happened. It's those strawberries, he thought. She said she loves strawberries. He had the strangest feeling that gardening would never make him feel the way it used to. Instead, coming here would just bombard him with all these memories… of her.
When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Suddenly he felt an odd sensation. She's in trouble. He knew that she needed him, wherever she was. Where is she? He began to run. "SHIGURE!!!! Where the hell did you put that address?!"
Do you see how much I need you right now?
Yuki felt it too. She wasn't happy. She wanted to come home. And he would take her home. But first – "SHIGURE!!!! I need that address!!!"
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
Yuki got to him first. "Shi- gu- re," he panted. "Where'd you put Honda-san's new address?"
"Hmm… why should I tell you?"
"Stop playing games, Shigure. Please. Just give me the address."
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
He ran faster. All he could see was her face. Somehow he knew – she wasn't smiling. Up ahead he could see Yuki talking to Shigure and he called out, "Shigure! Give me that address Tohru left!"
Shigure laughed. "Seems like we have two flustered little boys in search of a princess."
"SHUT UP, SHIGURE!"
He snickered again and handed Yuki a slip of paper. "Here. Go get her. Both of you."
"Why should I have to go with him? He doesn't care about Hon- I mean, he'll just get us lost!"
"Me?!? Shigure, why'd you give him the address? It'll take us days to get there with Yuki's sense of direction!"
Still chuckling, Shigure crossed his arms. "What's wrong with you two? Because, you know, I could always go get her myself…"
"NO!"
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
Kyo and Yuki set off, Yuki leading the way in solemn silence. After what seemed like hours of walking in circles, Kyo grabbed for the map. "Give it!"
"No!"
"Gimme the map, damn rat!" He knew that if she'd been here, she would've gasped and tried to make them stop fighting.
And make it okay
"Like you'd be able to make sense of this either!" Yuki protested, squinting at the paper. "Does this say "Maple Street" or "Marble Street?"
"Marble Street? What the hell?"
"Maybe if you'd pay attention to where we're going instead of brooding over Honda-san, we'd – "
"Fine! Look, here's Maple Street, okay? You happy?"
I miss you
We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were, yeah yeah
He didn't even need to look at the street number to know he'd found the right house. Honda-san was inside, he knew, waiting for him to take him home. Without a word, he began to run, dashing straight through the door without bothering to knock. He was about to call her name when he heard voices from behind a door. Honda-san!
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I do I give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe, I need to feel you here with me
Yeah
Kyo watched as Yuki began to run and sprinted to catch up. Yuki reached the house first, and pulled open the door. Kyo, running through, nearly bumped into Yuki, who'd stopped outside a room. Tohru! Together they listened as inside, Tohru cried.
(Tohru's POV:)
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
"If I live here… I'll be miserable. I wanted to stay…"
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
"I wanted to stay… with Sohma-kun… and Kyo-kun… and Shigure-san."
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
Yuki burst through the door. "I think it's time you came home." Tohru gasped.
"Eh?!"
And make it okay
"Let's go!" shouted Kyo, pulling Tohru out the door.
"Kyo-kun! You came… too!"
I missed you…
She knew that even though she was leaving her family, she was coming home. Home wasn't with Grandpa, even though she knew he loved her. No, home was with the Sohmas – not blood relations, but her family all the same.
And for the first time in a very long time, Tohru Honda felt like she belonged.