Without Saying Goodbye

by Rebel Against The Plaid Skirt

"It's been four years since you left without even saying goodbye. I'll probably leave this with the others." Crona mysteriously leaves four years ago, and hasn't returned. After finding a typewriter, Kid is compelled to begin writing to Crona, even if Crona can't get the letters. Because it's hard to let go of the one you love, especially when they leave without saying goodbye.

1. Letter 1

Dear Crona,

I'm not really sure what to say, which may or may not be surprising to you. You used to tell me that I always knew what to say, but if you knew me as well as I thought you did, then you know how bad I am at this stuff. I should probably start by apologizing. I'm not sure what I'm apologizing for, but whatever it is I did that pushed you away, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, and if I ever see you again, I hope you'll let me make it up to you.

After all, that would be the gentlemanly thing to do. I still strive towards being a gentleman, although I'm not sure why. Before you came along, I always acted like that because I'm Lord Death's son. I have to be a gentleman, right? Then you came, and the reason was simply to impress you. Did it work? I hope so, although even if it did, look at all the good it did. Even if you were impreessed, you left anyway, without even telling me goodbye.

You know, it's been four years. Four years since you left, and I still berate myself everyday. I should have done something different. But what? How can I know what to change if I don't know what I did wrong in the first place? I can't. Even if I could, what would be the point? It wouldn't bring you back from wherever you are. Where are you, anyway? Where did you go? You never mentioned other places when you talked to me, so I don't know where you could have possibly gone. Since you didn't tell me goodbye, I don't know what you were thinking when you left. I used to be able to read your emotions by just looking at your eyes. What would I have read on that day, Crona? Sadness? Anger? Were you angry at me? Did I say something wrong? Was there something I should have said, that I never did?

Well, I'll say it now. I'll say what I never got to tell you before you left. I'll say what I was planning to tell you the day you left, the day I had picked and been planning for weeks. I'll tell you what I was always too scared to tal about, much less to even mention.

I love you.

Not loved. Not past tense, but present tense. I still love you. Is it ridiculous to say that I feel relieved that I told you? even though this is just going in a box under my bed, never to be mailed? Becuase I do. It's insane, I know, but I can't help but hope that even though you left without saying goodbye, that maybe, you loved me too.

-Death the Kid