Well, if you must know...
I was sitting in the sunlight, in bliss, petals flying through the air. It was very cliche. I felt THE something in my hand and the bliss erupted from my heart. I clenched my hand around the weapon. The flare gun... a stupid way. But it would have to do. I wasn't going to use my sword.
Although, Titan blood had been on it before.
My stare went cold into the horizon. The afternoon sun was just hot enough to send prickles on my skin. Hot white little needles that felt good. I raised my hand and just turned the smooth steel around in my hand for a bit. I thought of Mikasa, and how she- well, before what I was about to do, she always acted like a jealous girlfriend. She would be so sad... not enough to convince yourself, Jaeger. I thought. I sighed, drank in the air. It smelled like rain. I squeezed my toes into the dirt.
I thought of Armin. He would be so much less without me, his potential would shrink back into a dark hole of depression. Then maybe he may join you. Only one tear. Only one tear streaked down my face in regret as my hair waved in the wind. Then I clenched away the others, shook them from my eyelashes.
Levi. Levi would... Levi would tear. Levi would break and it would shatter his soul. Wouldn't having to execute you for being the last Titan be worse? He would blame himself.
But... Levi.
I raised my hand, finger shaking, wrapped loosely around the trigger anyways.
Just then he came running up the hill, screaming that Hanji had told him, and no, and stop.
Poor Levi.
My hand wavered.
It rose to my temple.
He stood only ten feet away.
" Goodbye, Corporal. See you whenever that immortality of yours ends."
His face twisted in horror and anguish as, for the first time I had seen, compassionate tears flowed down Rivaille's face. He dropped to his knees, his arms went numb, because he knew there was nothing he could do.
I will wait for him.