"As deep as the sea, as beautiful as the heart,
as terrifying as death, but as powerful as life.
This is love. " -xyylence
The realization slowly creeped onto Gail as her lips pursed into a small smile. The ring on her finger glistened in the room as the last of the sun's rays peaked through the blinds and were replaced by a subtle moonlight.
It was a quiet evening, and Gail had been somewhat awake for the last few hours, her eyes half lidded as drowsiness had started to overcome her consciousness, but she continued to wait for her wife to rise from what seemed like an endless slumber. Everyone said their goodbyes hours ago and let the couple have time together in peace.
Gail's thin fingers ran through Holly's long hair, a habit that she had grown well accustomed to in the past couple months. Holly loved it, and Gail thought the simple gesture was temporarily relaxing.
As Holly's eyes gradually opened, the pale moonlight greeted her stare and after an ephemeral daze, she groggily overlooked the aftermath of a particularly hectic day. There were bundles of bouquets placed atop the nightstand and across the small table in the corner of the room. Tulips. Gail loved the white tulips; they represented purity, heaven, and freshness. It was fitting. Holly watched as the flowers wistfully danced back and forth from the draft that was seeping through the crack of the window as Gail continued to stroke her hair.
They laid in silence before Holly turned her head and let her sight fall to the person, whose pale blue eyes held an intense look of deep affection. These were the last hours before the new day emerged; these hours were theirs. Tomorrow, it would be different. Tomorrow would be a new beginning. But tomorrow, the love they shared would never falter.
" I love you," Gail whispered. She didn't know how many times she said it today, but if she could, she would say it again and again till all the stars in the sky burnt out and the world was coming to an end.
The drowsiness was starting to close in on Gail, as her eyes started to feel heavy and a certain airiness layered over her body like a shroud. Gail smiled and continued her three-worded mantra as her voice hushed down into a whisper and her words began to slur. But after a short while, as she held onto the fragments of what she had left of their night together, she heard Holly's voice again.
"…To have and to hold, from this day forward…through the good times and in bad. I will love you, Gail Peck-Stewart…" Holly paused and enjoyed the new sound of her name intertwined with her other half. "...and honor you all the days of my life."
5 days prior
" Are you ready?" Holly cleared the silence. The usual well-kept doctor was nervous, and she was beyond scared.
" Of course. I'm ready." Gail kissed Holly's forehead. Holl could only sigh in content.
" I love you."
A comfortable silence filled the air as Holly embraced the woman tightly before pulling back and resting her hand on Gail's thigh.
That's when Gail felt it too. The blonde inched her hands forward till her fingertips touched Holly's palm.
" I love you too."
Gail began to lean forward, but a harsh cough escaped her lips. Holly gave her a look in concern, and waited until she saw the familiar eyes of composure, before she met the other woman half way to seal a kiss. It was chaste, much like their first non-official kiss in the coat room. Holly leaned her forehead against Gail's.
She held her familiar crooked smile, " How much longer?"
" Soon, I've lost count. You've been very distracting these days." Gail mumbled as she pressed her lips against Holly's. Holly was lost in a bliss, she could kiss Gail's lips for days on end until
there was absolutely no energy left within her.
Gail pulled back, leaning against the bed as she heaved a long awaited breath. The other woman quickly followed, resting her head on Gail's chest as she listened to the gentle lullaby of the woman's beating heart. It lulled Holly to sleep, and for once, Holly drifted off easilly.
Holly hadn't dreamt in ages, what she was beginning to see, was an expanse of colors paint this surreal world, it was beautiful. She wanted Gail to accompany her. Holly sorely wished to experience everything with Gail, even in the hours of rest.
Holly saw a flock of white birds fly high above the clouds, contrasting the different shades of the sunset. If only time flew like those doves, she would've wanted to watch them hand in hand with Gail, as they flew across the horizon, in hopes that there would be no end.
Gail saw a gentle smile form on Holly's sleeping lips. That was all it took for her to lean down and kiss her forehead.
Holly stirred, and was pulled away from her dream; the doves blurred in the background and were replaced by a white ceiling.
" Go back to sleep Hols. You look more beautiful that way," Gail said as Holly shook her head and pushed the younger woman's shoulder playfully.
" I think I look beautiful both ways," Holly challenged with a smirk. Gail couldn't help but agree.
" You always look beautiful. In flannel and back-" That caused another push to Gail's shoulder before the blonde continued. "You're beautiful Holly. In my eyes, I see that beauty. From your crooked smile and from within your heart."
Holly beamed at the sentiment.
30 days prior
"Really Gail?" Holly tapped her foot on the cold tiles, counting each second that Gail continued to ignore her.
Holly watched as the woman jammed her fingers on the buttons in a frenzy. Holly adjusted her glasses on her nose and instantly smiled when Gail pursed her lips and frowned as the character died once again.
Holly seized the moment and slapped the stack of papers on Gail's lap. "You should really be more serious about this wedding Gail. I can't do this all by myself." Holly sighed and pulled up a chair to sit down.
" Holly, just let me be. I love this game and this gameboy is going to die one day. Look at it Holly, it's starting to fall apart." Gail said. The blonde continued to look at the screen as the character sprung to life once again and jumped over the pipe. Holly hated when Gail did that. It was not fair.
" I hate that stupid game."
" You can't diss Mario, Holly. You just can't." Gail continued to jam the buttons in attempt to collect all the gold coins.
" I can never seem to win with that stupid midget." Holly's hand unconsciously reached towards Gail to smooth out her shorter, tousled hair.
" Ugh, not again." Gail sighed as her character fell into the lava. Gail tossed the handheld console to the side of the bed and looked over at Holly.
The woman was frowning; Gail needed to fix that.
Not a few seconds later, Holly closed her eyes as the languid touch of Gail's caress ceased all the hints of frustration and impatience plastered on her face. It was like magic; whenever Gail touched Holly, everything seemed almost whole again.
But it was different with Gail, it took a lot of effort for Holly to make her lover as calm as she was right now in that quick of time. Although, these days, Holly was the only person to successfully wipe away any angry emotions Gail had.
80 days prior
Gail was in a coughing fit, her throat felt dry, but she shook it off.
" Really Trace? I can't believe another killer dumped a body here, of all places." Gail said in disbelief as she got out of the car.
" I know, it's really weird." Traci responded and clicked her keys to lock up the squad car. " Let me check the outer perimeter, you go on ahead."
Gail stopped in her tracks. " What? I really don't want to smell like dead body again for the third day in a row Trace." Gail crossed her arms.
" Hey, at least someone didn't vomit on you yesterday, " Traci countered.
" You deserved it for ditching me the other day for a date with my stupid brother."
" Gail this is our last hour of the day, besides, Holly is probably checking the body as we speak."
The mention of Holly's name was all it took. Gail was already walking away from Traci before the detective needed to urge the blonde further.
By the time Gail reached the bottom of the hill, she was breathless, the familiar constriction of her chest lingering within her. Gail was confused. There was no dead body, and there was no one really in the vicinity, except for Traci who claimed to be scoping the outer perimeter of the scene.
A small red lunchbox stood out amongst the dirt and bramble. Gail furrowed her brow and hesitantly walked over to the lunchbox and bent down to poke it.
" Hey Officer, you're not allowed to be down there."
Gail knew that voice. " Thanks, I appreciate it."
" Officer." Holly said in a stern voice with a hint of playfulness.
It had been weeks since their words were this lighthearted. " Yes, Lunchbox?" Gail curved her lips into a smile and turned around to see Holly in the same outfit from their first meeting.
" Will you marry me?"
Gail was confused, utterly confused. She wasn't sure if she heard that correctly. " Wait, what?"
" You heard me the first time." Holly walked towards Gail and brushed her hand against the stunned officer.
Gail looked at Holly with a doubtful expression.
" Do I really have to get down on my knee Gail?"
Gail raised her eyebrow.
" I'm not that old school Gail."
The blonde woman coughed, but quickly covered it up by clearing her throat and ending it with a smirk.
Holly rolled her eyes and dusted her jeans off to get ready to kneel. " You are so full of-"
Gail silenced her. She pulled Holly by the collar and kissed her. The shorter woman smiled into the kiss as tears fell down her cheeks. It had been weeks since she heard something so positive.
100 days prior
Holly leaned over Gail's bare body and pressed soft kisses up her neck until she reached the woman's lips. Gail smiled into the kiss before she felt her chest constrict tightly, it hurt. Gail was breathless and helpless under Holly. It felt different this time. Almost painful.
…
Gail broke as she let the words sink in and echo in her ear. She wanted to run, run far away. Away from all trees, the people, and this place ridden with sick people. Gail was not sick. But most of all, she wanted to run from Holly, run far away where Holly could never find her. But it was Holly, finding Gail was inevitable with her.
Still, Gail wanted to just get up and leave this place. When you were being chased at this stage, it was over before you could even think about persevering through something like this.
The man pursed his lips and excused himself from the room.
The moment the door clicked shut, Gail didn't hold back. She swiped the medical instruments from their hangers, she knocked down the waste bin, she opened and slammed the drawers. Gail clenched her jaws as she slammed her knuckles against the cabinets, watching as her skin became marred with scarlet. There was no going back, Gail was in a rampage. She continued to slam her first against the table until she couldn't feel the pain anymore.
And then there was nothing. Gail pulled herself back and she stood in the corner looking at the aftermath of the tiny exam room. Everything had fallen, but there off in the middle of the room, stood Holly. Holly stood strong against the harsh storm that enveloped Gail.
Gail trembled as she slunk against the wall and dropped to her knees. She screamed, she yelled, and she cried.
Gail felt warm arms embrace her, but she pushed them away in anger. " Get away from me."
" Gail…" Holly said.
" Stage four" Gail laughed bitterly as tears streamed down her face. Her breathing choked up and she started to violently cough once again. Arms wrapped around her shoulders tightly after the coughing seized. Holly's arms were firm and unbinding against Gail. Holly was not going to let go, ever.
" I can't do this Holly. There will be a point where I can't even fucking breathe." she thrashed against Holly, using up all the energy she had left till the firm grip released.
" Gail…" Holly paced backwards a few steps trying not to scare the blonde any further.
" What." the woman's jaw tightened and glared at Holly.
" Come closer…" Holly said, her eyes were soft and forgiving.
Gail refused, but she knew that her stubborn walls were failing. She continued to stare at Holly, she didn't look anywhere else, but in her eyes. Holly's eyes were relentless in their silent battle, but it proved to be the victor as Gail's sharp gaze steadily subsided. Gail surrendered and inched a bit closer to Holly.
" Closer Gail…" Holly repeated. "...Please." Holly never begged for anything with Gail, but at this moment she wanted to try everything and anything to calm her lover down. Holly needed to be strong.
Gail trembled as she made her way towards Holly, the vulnerable woman nearly stumbled into the awaiting arms. Holly breathed slowly as she tried to get Gail to stop hyperventilating. It took awhile and Holly felt the tears well up in her eyes, but she stubbornly refused to let them flow. When all was silent, and the soft whimpers came to a standstill, they were in each others arms breathing in tandem.
" I'll breathe for you."
Author's Note: What do you think? Sorry for any mistakes.