Title: Hint of Mortality
Fandom: True Blood
Rating: PG-13 for minor sexual situation
Disclaimer: I don't own anything! :P
Characters/Pairings: Jessica-centric, Hoyt, Jessica/Hoyt
Spoilers/Warnings:Set sometime after 2x3. They are still seeing each other despite what everyone else says...
Summary: Wordlessly, he pressed his lips together and planted a soft kiss on her finger, never letting her out of his sight. He should blink, Jessica knew he should blink like he should breathe, but neither of
them were blinking as if convinced not to miss a second of this, whatever this was.
Word Count: 1489
Author's Notes: Ever since the last epi {2x03} I have had both fluffy and naughty ideas in my head for them. They are just too cute to leave them alone! *g* =P
~ English is not my native language, so excuse any crappiness and/or mistakes!
HINT OF MORTALITY
She brushed her red hair away from her face with her fingers, so that she could more fully appreciate the sight of him. Dear God, he was smiling.
He knew she was a vampire but still he was smiling at her. No sign of fear in his eyes. He didn't make a sound as he was waiting for her to make the next move, which she gladly did, as she lowered herself closer to him on the couch.
For a moment she just closed her eyes trying to savor the sensation of his warmth against the coldness of her body.
She was cold, she was dead, but God knew inside she felt as if she were on fire. The only time her insides matched her hair.
In flames.
She felt like she was in flames and she didn't even care. She was a vampire now…shouldn't the fire scare her?
Instead, she was crossing the line and breaking every rule her mind warned her not to.
In a second she was on top of him, straddling him and she put her hands on either side of him, finally resting them on his shoulders. He didn't protest.
He lifted his head to look up in her eyes and he let out a soft chuckle.
It probably wasn't the right time to chuckle, but it seemed he was just as nervous as she was. They were two children. Two children suddenly given more freedom than they knew what to do with…
She let her hand roam the side of his face appreciating the soft curve of his cheek, her finger resting on top of his full lips.
Wordlessly, he pressed his lips together and planted a soft kiss on her finger, never letting her out of his sight. He should blink, Jessica knew he should blink like he should breathe, but neither of them were blinking as if convinced not to miss a second of this, whatever this was.
She leaned even closer to him and kissed him on his forehead.
She knew her heart wasn't beating anymore but what was this feeling?
What was this rush she was experiencing? She knew she wasn't breathing anymore but why did she feel like she was panting? Gasping?
Was it out of habit? Was it out of lack of control?
Her blue eyes were seeing only him, all white cheeks and puppy eyes and lips that just begged to be kissed.
That's what Hoyt was. That's what he was to her.
Jessica stirred in an attempt to shake some sense and self-control into her, but she didn't know if it was working. Bill's voice was loud and clear inside her head.
She was vile, an abomination and for that her contact with humans should be limited, for she was dangerous to them.
Her teeth were sharp and pointy; her teen hands which up to now held only pencils and brooms, could be weapons of destruction…
Her appetite all-consuming.
But she was human. At least she used to be till two weeks ago and the distance Bill wanted her to put between herself and the human race seemed too rushed and biased.
How could vampires - her "people" from now on- ever maintain that they were superior to humans when they themselves admitted that in front of a human they might not be able to keep themselves from bleeding them?
Wasn't that weakness? Wasn't that hypocrisy?
But if vampires really were that superior, shouldn't humans leave them unaffected?
Funny, Jessica never thought she would feel compelled to have such thoughts.
Her only worries up till the cursed day Bill sired her were what clothes she should wear to school. Or maybe how not to infuriate daddy again.
Now Bill told her that everyone should be careful not to infuriate her…
Well how about hurting her?
How about not assuming she was the monster for a moment?
She could still get hurt. Maybe she shouldn't be, but she did and she was hurting.
It was only a few hours till she had last cried.
Why did her own maker assume she was the worst of the worst?
Why couldn't he just trust her?
She would never hurt a human. Not kill him anyways.
Especially not Hoyt.
Sweet, tender Hoyt who made her feel as if she retained some part of her humanity still.
Just the mere feel of him underneath her was enough to make her shiver with longing and affection, if indeed she was capable of affection.
She would never hurt him. She would really die if she hurt him.
Not the only creature in weeks that had shown any kindness to her…
Immediately she felt her eyes stinging and she forced herself stay calm. She didn't want to scare Hoyt away with her blood tears.
In an instant her fangs were fully extended –as if to remind her of where exactly she stood- leaving her ashamed and embarrassed.
Her grip was tight on Hoyt, tighter than it would have been if she were back to being the inexperienced 17-year-old she was before Bill sired her.
Should it be a source of embarrassment that she was still inexperienced?
Would he laugh if he found out?
Did her follow her 'home' fascinated by the idea that he had just flirted with a vampire which was probably centuries old and emancipated?
Would he be disappointed if he found out otherwise?
Thoughts were crossing her mind at the speed of light and she wasn't sure she could tackle the worst of them.
She pulled Hoyt into an embrace he reciprocated with passion and Jessica felt soothed when their chests crushed together, his heartbeat almost reverberating in her own ribcage.
She knew she was two-sided now, she had two natures within her, one vampire; one human, but the latter was already fading, according to Bill.
Hoyt's skin felt so hot under her fingers.
Throbbing with life and Jessica felt as if she wanted to cry, a sob escaping her lips because of it.
She felt so close to life when he touched her.
So close to somebody alive again, someone with blood through his veins and a heart that was beating and a soul that could feel and mourn and rejoice.
She didn't know if she was capable of that anymore.
Even her own tears mocked her in their crimson stickiness…
Hesitantly breaking their embrace, she traced her fingers across his collarbone sensing the hardness of the bone under his skin, momentarily surprised at how easy to break it seemed.
Even though she hadn't done it before, somehow she knew that she could break it with a snap of her fingers and she was sure he didn't really know that.
Was he there under her, hugging her because he didn't know?
Because he didn't fully grasp the danger he had found himself in?
Would he leave running and screaming if he knew?
She knew she wouldn't be able to handle that.
To see the fear and the disgust in his eyes, in anyone's eyes.
Everything would be different from now on. It would be different for the rest of her life or un-life.
And just for a moment she wanted it to be the same, feel the same.
She wanted to be treated like the fragile 17-year-old girl that she was or used to be.
She slowly lowered her head to rest it on his shoulder, her nose and mouth in the nape of his neck and he didn't even flinch.
He didn't even suck in a breath.
She sighed even though she didn't know that she could, inhaling his scent.
A delicious, masculine scent with a hint of mortality, so alien to her now and, for that, so enticing.
If only she could feel that mortality again, even for a moment.
If only she could feel on the brink of death, afraid and panicked…
Then maybe she would be close to feeling alive.
"Please hold me, Hoyt" she whispered in his ear.
"Hold me like you mean it, like nothing matters. Like nothing is different between us. Just two souls desperate to bond and stay warm in the winter of this life" she went on.
She was sure she sounded like the nineteenth century maidens she read about in the books she kept tucked under her pillow when her mom and dad weren't looking, but she hoped he would
understand her.
She felt him pause for a moment as if he sucked in a breath.
Was he surprised she was so romantic? Was he appalled at her naivety?
Jessica didn't know, but as he held her tighter in his arms as if she were precious and he replied: "I will never leave you. I am yours forever" she let out a breath she had no idea she was holding,
allowing one more human emotion to take over her.
Love.
And maybe, just maybe that could be her salvation….
~ Fin ~