Disclaimer: I do not own of these characters; they are the property of Shoot the Moon Enterprises and Warner Bros. Television. I acknowledge gratefully the hard work of the creators of the series who brought to life characters we like so much we can't let them go.
The Son Also Rises
Because why did we never see the boys again after "One Flew East"?
"So who are we going to tell first?" Amanda asked as they lay cuddled together on Lee's bed.
"What do you mean? Your mother and the boys should be first obviously."
"You don't think we should make sure it's not going to cause problems at work first? Maybe we should talk to Billy before we tell anyone else."
"A-man-da! Absolutely not! We are not letting work dictate our lives anymore. Besides, Francine already knows – sort of – and Billy has done everything except book a church for us himself so he's going to be happy no matter what. No, work can wait until Monday."
"Lee! Billy isn't work!"
"Okay, we tell Billy un-officially next, but we tell the family first." Lee paused and asked uncertainly, "So how do we do that?"
Amanda began to giggle. "Well Sweetheart, it's not exactly going to be a surprise to any of them after all this time!"
"No, but do we just go in and announce it? Or do you want me to propose in front of them? Should I ask for your mother's blessing?"
That really set Amanda off shrieking with laughter. "Ask for her blessing? Lee, she's ready to march us down the aisle at gunpoint!"
"I know – why do you think I keep my gun hidden from her? I just feel like I owe her something after all this time."
"Excuse me? You owe her something?"
Lee looked up and met Amanda's laughing eyes. "Well, you already know I love you – now I have to convince her!"
"She already knows you love me!"
"I meant I have to convince her I love her!"
"You're in love with my mother?"
"Amanda! I meant I want her to know how much I want to be part of her family!"
It was no good – she was curled up in a ball beside him, laughing so hard it eventually set him off as well.
When they finally managed to stop, Lee asked, "Ok, seriously, how do you want to do this? Just put on your ring and go home?"
Amanda was still wiping the tears from her eyes as she struggled to sit upright and lean back against the headboard. "No, because they all saw me this morning without it and they think we've just been at work all day. We can't have them thinking you didn't do something romantic – Mother would be so disappointed if she thought you just asked me over coffee break or something."
"As opposed to the romance of proposing in a terrorist's dungeon?" responded Lee, shaking his head.
Amanda cupped his cheek in her hand and looked into his eyes laughing. "Hey! That was romantic! Nothing says I really love you like waiting until I hadn't showered or brushed my teeth for four days and still asking!"
Lee rolled his eyes, hiding his secret pleasure at how easily she could joke about that horrible week now. He leaned over to give her a quick peck on the lips and then got back to the topic at hand. "So do you want a proposal in front of them then?"
Amanda did her best to look serious. "Oh, that's a lot of pressure too – to make it seem natural, I mean. How about we just spend time with them tonight and then during the weekend, we'll see what comes naturally. If we haven't found an obvious opportunity by Saturday night, we'll disappear on a walk or something and then come back and announce it."
"Fine," Lee grumbled. "If we've managed to not tell them this long, I guess I can handle one more day."
Amanda giggled. "Listen to Mr. Grumpy over there – I think you're more excited to tell them than I am."
"Am I? Really?"
"No, not really," she wriggled into his arms. "I'm just about bursting at the seams – it's been too long already."
"I couldn't agree with you more." He kissed her once more, then stood up and held out a hand to help her from the bed. "Allons-y, ma chère."
"So what did you and Mom do while we were away?" came an inquiring voice from the backseat.
Lee glanced in the rear view and met Jamie's eyes. He and Amanda had swapped cars after he'd volunteered to go pick up the boys from the pool party while Amanda went to Marvin's to pick up dinner. She'd promised the boys to make their favorites, but that trip to Marion - and other more enjoyable distractions - had put too big a dent in her schedule for that to happen now. Happily, as she'd pointed out to Lee, adolescent boys are always happy to have junk food, so they wouldn't really be disappointed.
Lee tried to answer Jamie's question with as much truth as possible. "Oh not too much really. It'll be nice to have the weekend together actually. There was a big project at work that kept me busy so we barely saw each other most days."
"Really? What was the project about?"
"Uhhhh - a kind of history of Russian defectors. Who knows, by the time you get to high school, maybe you'll get to sleep through it in class one day."
Phillip laughed but Jamie just made a small noise of acknowledgement before saying, "So it just kept you busy? Mom wasn't helping?"
"Well she was but more in the behind-the-scenes stuff. Our friend Francine was helping me a lot with the research parts."
"Oh. Well, she's nice. That must have been fun." Jamie's voice was oddly flat and Lee looked in the rear view again, trying to figure out if mentioning Francine had upset him somehow.
"So good time at the pool today?" he finally asked.
Phillip began to enthusiastically describe the waterslide that had been installed since their last visit, but Lee noticed that Jamie had lapsed back into meditative silence.
They arrived back at the house, Phillip bouncing in like a rubber ball, Jamie following more slowly. Lee hung back for a moment, studying his body language and trying to decipher if he was just tired or if something was bothering him, before following him into the house.
Maybe it's a good thing we decided not to spring an engagement on them if something's up with him.
Unlike his brother – but just like his mother – Jamie didn't dump everything in the hall on his way in, but stopped to place it carefully out of the way of traffic, even pulling his wet towel and trunks out of the bag and carrying them through to the laundry room before coming back to the kitchen and silently surveying the scene.
Phillip was already at the counter, bouncing on his toes and telling Amanda and Dotty about the party while he dug through the paper bags from Marvin's. Amanda batted his hands away, sending him to wash his hands, before beginning to pull out plates. She turned to ask Jamie to set the table, only to find him already halfway through the task. She raised her eyebrows and glanced at Lee with a questioning expression. Jamie was the responsible one but this seemed robotically well behaved even for him. Lee shrugged – they could both tell something was up, but they'd seen him too little in the past week to understand what it could be.
Dotty caught the look passing between them and sidled over to Lee. "I take it you don't know what's going on there either?" she whispered.
"No, he was like that the whole way home on the car," he muttered back, out of the side of his mouth. "Could something at the party have upset him? Maybe some girl?"
Dotty grinned. "Funny how your mind goes straight there, Lee." She gave her grandson a considering glance. "I don't know though – he seemed okay when he left this morning and he was in a wonderful mood this past week up in the mountains."
Lee looked stricken. "Do you think it's something I did? Or didn't do?" He wracked his brain trying to think if he'd promised Jamie something before the trip to the mountains.
"I can think of at least one thing you haven't done, Dear, but I doubt that's what's upset Jamie," replied Dotty with a knowing look as she walked away.
And let the jabs begin thought Lee, smiling inwardly at the thought of finally telling their family about their wedding plans.
Jamie stayed mostly quiet through dinner, answering politely enough when addressed and actually becoming quite enthused describing some of the things he and Phillip had done on their trip with Dotty and Curt, but in between he lapsed into silence again, obviously a million miles away. When dinner was over, he asked to be excused and picked up his plate to take it to the sink. Phillip was excused as well and bounded up from the table. During one of those silences that often fall in the middle of a conversation, the three adults could clearly hear Phillip and Jamie's hissed whispers.
"Told you it wouldn't work, Wormbrain!" mocked Phillip.
"Shut up! It just needs more time!"
"It's been a month! If you want it that bad, you should just ask!"
"Don't be dumb! It'll work! It's just taking longer than I thought!"
The three grownups exchanged looks but it was obvious none of them had the slightest clue what the boys were fighting about. After a moment, Jamie disappeared upstairs while Phillip reappeared to ask if Lee wanted to go into the backyard and help him with his football throws. It couldn't have been more than ten minutes later when the phone rang.
"Oh hi, Joe! How are you?" asked Amanda, hearing her ex's voice.
"I'm fine but is there something going on between you and Jamie that I don't know about?" he asked immediately.
Amanda slumped onto one of the kitchen stools, lifting her eyes to meet Dotty's concerned expression. "Not that I know of, but he's been in a weird mood since he got home. Why are you asking? Has he said something to you?"
"Well, not directly, but I just got off the phone with him and he was asking if he and Phillip could come over again next weekend. I mean, I'm never going to complain about him wanting to spend time with me, but it just seemed odd – he had that camping weekend with us, and then he went away with Dotty and well, I just wondered if he was upset with you or maybe Lee for some reason."
"I don't know why he would be, he's barely seen either of us for long enough in the last few weeks to have something to be mad about." Amanda chewed her lip as she tried to think of something, anything that would have her youngest son trying to avoid home. "What did you tell him?"
"Well I told him he's always welcome here, of course, but that he should make sure it was okay with you – and that's when he got kind of weird and evasive. Anyway, I told him it was still fine but I hoped you'd know what's up."
"I don't yet, but I'm darn sure going to find out," she answered immediately. "If he won't tell me, I know how to make Phillip talk."
Joe's warm chuckle came down the phone line. "Okay, just let me know if I need to get involved."
"I'll let you know either way. Thanks for calling, Sweetheart."
Amanda hung up slowly and stared into space for a moment.
"What was all that about?" asked her mother gently.
"Apparently Jamie's just phoned Joe to see if they can go stay there again next weekend but won't tell him why," she answered absently. She looked over at her mother. "What could be bothering him so much that he won't talk to me about it?" she asked in a hurt tone. "He's always told me everything!"
"Well, I haven't the faintest idea, Amanda, but I don't think you're talking to the right person." Dotty pointed at the ceiling with a knowing look.
"You're right," Amanda sighed. She glanced out the back window to where Lee had just sent a football spiraling into Phillip's hands. "Do you think I should send Lee up there? Maybe it's a guy thing."
"Your call," shrugged Dotty, "but you've done pretty well with them up to now. Maybe if you can't get it out of him, Lee can try later."
Amanda considered that for a moment, then steeled herself to go upstairs. She paused outside the boys' bedroom door and knocked quietly. Hearing no answer, she pushed it open gently to find Jamie standing lost in thought as he stared at a pile of clothes on his bed and an open suitcase
"You unpacking from your trip or planning to run away from home?" she asked with a smile.
Jamie lifted his head to look at her and gave a deep sigh. "Did Dad just call you? I heard the phone ring."
"Yeah," admitted Amanda. "He was worried we were fighting about something." She paused as Jamie's shoulders slumped. "So are we? Fighting about something, I mean?" She ventured further into the room and perched on the side of the bed. "I mean, I'm happy that you want to spend time with your dad, but you know, I've hardly gotten to see you guys lately – I miss you."
Jamie came and sat beside her, fidgeting with a pair of socks in his hands. "I miss you too," he sighed.
"So how come you want to go back to your dad's next weekend already? Did I do something? Did Lee? Or someone else? You know you can talk to either of us, Honey."
"No, you haven't done anything," muttered Jamie. "Not a thing. Not a darn thing."
Amanda tried to read between the lines, but came up blank. "We heard you and Phillip downstairs – can you tell me what it is that 'isn't working'?"
"You heard that, huh?" Jamie snuck a quick look at her before going back to staring at the socks. "Phillip's right – it was a dumb idea."
"What was a dumb idea?" prodded Amanda. "Are you in trouble somehow?"
"No, nothing like that." Jamie went silent again and just when she thought she was never going to get anything out of him, it burst out of him. "It's just… sometimes I wish I was a regular kid."
Amanda stared at him, speechless. "Sweetheart, what are you taking about? You're the most regular kid I know!"
He pushed his glasses back up his nose and sighed. "No, I'm not. I'm the weird kid." He looked up at her helpless expression. "Nobody else has a dad that they barely know. Their dads are around all the time and come to their games and yell at the refs and they act like they're really embarrassed, you know? But really they like that their dad shows up and…"
"So you want to spend more time with your Dad? Well, that doesn't need to be a big secret, Sweetheart," Amanda said encouragingly.
"No! I mean, yeah, I like getting to spend more time with Dad, but he still lives across town, not here – and I'd like to be a regular family, like my friends."
Amanda couldn't help the pang of disappointment. "Well, your Dad isn't going to move back here, Jamie," she began, trying to choose her words carefully. "I mean, he's marrying Carrie and they have their own house…"
"That's not what I meant!" said Jamie sounding slightly shocked. "I mean, I like seeing Dad lots now that he's home and I really like Carrie – she's super nice but it's just that when Lee came to pick us up today, I thought maybe it was because he wanted to talk to us alone and then he just talked about what we'd been doing all day and about how busy he'd been at work and then I got home and there was just Marvin's instead of a special dinner – I mean, don't get me wrong, I love Marvin's – but you'd said you were going to make us something special and then everything was just normal, you know?"
Amanda stared at him, completely confused. "Is normal bad?" She found herself having to bite her lip as soon as she'd asked, suddenly remembering all the conversations she and Lee had had about "normal".
"No, normal is great – it's just that I thought this time maybe finally it would be different."
"Jamie, Sweetheart, you've lost me."
Jamie took a deep breath. "You guys have been together forever and Lee said ages ago that he wanted to marry you and so I kept thinking that one day you'd tell us you were getting married but it's been months and nothing's happened so I figured that maybe you never got any time alone to be romantic and stuff so me and Phillip have been trying to go over to Dad's a lot so that you could go on dates and stuff without worrying about us and so maybe he'd finally ask you, and then today I was sure that's why you offered to make us a special dinner and then it wasn't special and you don't have a ring and - "
"Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Amanda held up her hands in an effort to stop the never ending sentence. "Are you trying to tell me that you and Phillip have been avoiding me all summer on purpose?"
"No!" said Jamie indignantly. "We weren't avoiding you! We were just trying to give you, whaddyacallit, 'me time'. And it hasn't been any good because every time we come home everything is exactly the same!" He finished his outburst and pulled his glasses off to wipe his eyes on his shirt.
"Oh." It was all Amanda could manage to get out, concerned that if she tried to say anything else she'd burst into hysterical laughter.
Jamie looked at her suspiciously, as if he could sense the tenuous grip she had on herself. "See? You think it was a stupid idea too!"
"No, no, I don't. I really don't!" Amanda managed to choke out, taking in a deep breath. She stared down at her hands and her bare ring finger, trying desperately to think of how to handle this unexpected situation.
What a day – first Lee and his stupid list and then his stupid 'never happened' and now this. If she hadn't known it would upset Jamie, she would have been laughing by now. And then she got an idea. She could almost hear Boris Karloff's voice in her head: What a wonderful, awful idea.
She took a deep breath and tried very hard to control her voice. "You know what? You're right. I've been too easy on Lee, waiting for him to get up his nerve. But you know what else? I can't ask him to ask me to marry him – I mean that would just be me proposing to him, right? But you could tell him, you and Phillip, I mean…" She let the sentence drift off and snuck a look at Jamie through her lashes. He was looking at her half suspiciously, half interested.
"You want me and Phillip to make him propose?" he asked.
"Well, not exactly make him, Sweetheart. Maybe just, you know, encourage him. You know he'd do anything for the two of you."
Jamie had the beginning of a slight smile on his face. "You mean because of he's still worried we only like him because he has a cool car?."
"You do like him, don't you?" asked Amanda suddenly uncertain.
"Of course we like him! He's awesome!" scoffed Jamie. "That's why we want him here all the time. We wouldn't have to share you if he was here every day and we could just be a normal family!"
"I know Lee would really like to be part of a normal family," Amanda agreed. She grinned at her youngest son. "But maybe he just needs a push…?"
Jamie's small smile broadened as he took in what she was saying. "So I should go downstairs and give him a man-to-man talk?"
"Oh no!" Amanda was laughing openly now. "He's already worried that you're mad at him about something – you should take advantage of that. How about I send him up here?"
Jamie nodded, grinning broadly. "Yeah, okay. That would be fun."
"Okay, but don't frighten him off, alright?" Amanda patted his hand and stood up to walk to the door, but stopped when he called her back.
"Mom? What I said before, about not being a regular family? I didn't mean it to sound like you and Grandma didn't do a good job – you're an awesome mom and I don't ever want Grandma to leave or anything but you really love Lee, don't you?"
She stopped and smiled at him. "I really, really do, Sweetheart. Almost as much as I love you and Phillip."
Jamie's face lit up with laughter. "Okay then. Send up the victim."
Amanda walked slowly back down the stairs, trying her best to get the smile off her face and to look as serious as possible. She must have succeeded because when she walked out into the garden, Lee's expression immediately became one of concern.
"Is everything okay?" he asked worriedly.
"Well, I think whatever is up with Jamie must be a guy thing because he won't talk to me at all. Do you think maybe you could try? He's really upset about something."
She felt a twinge of guilt at how worried Lee looked at that moment but then she remembered that ridiculous list and stood aside as he squared his shoulders and headed inside to talk to his stepson. She waited until he was out of earshot before whispering to Phillip, "You should probably go too since you were in on Jamie's plan."
Phillip looked at her with a shocked expression. "You know about the plan?"
"Yep – now scoot upstairs and help your brother! He's going to give Lee a man-to-man talk but it might be better with two men!"
Phillip's easy grin appeared and he shot off after Lee.
Amanda followed his path back into the house more slowly, sliding onto one of the kitchen stools and dropping her face into her hands before beginning to rock back and forth laughing uncontrollably.
"Are you alright, Darling?" asked Dotty.
Amanda looked up and pointed an accusing finger at her mother. "I blame you! He's exactly like you!" she managed to gasp out before starting to laugh again.
"Who's exactly like me?" asked Dotty in confusion.
"Jamie! He's been on the warpath this whole summer – exactly like you!"
By now, Dotty was laughing simply from the way Amanda couldn't stop. "Amanda! What on earth are you talking about?"
Amanda straightened up, took in a deep breath and told her the whole story of Jamie's plan. As she went on, Dotty's eyes grew wider and wider and then she began to laugh helplessly as well.
"Oh my Lord!" she finally managed to gasp out. "And you sent Lee upstairs without telling him any of that?"
"Well, he did something dumb today and I owe him a tiny bit of revenge for that," admitted Amanda. "But the thing is, Mother…" she paused and looked up at Dotty with a smile.
Dotty gasped and clasped her hands together, her face lighting up with pleasure. "Amanda! Are you and Lee making it official at last?"
"Well, yes – but you can't let on that you know! He wanted to talk to you and the boys first but now that Jamie's forced the issue…"
"My lips are sealed. You know, Amanda, I was quite the hit as Ado Annie in my college production of Oklahoma – I'm sure I can dredge up enough old acting skills to convince Lee I'm surprised!"
"I'm sure you can, Mo-". Amanda stopped speaking abruptly as they both heard the boys' bedroom door open and Lee's footsteps moving slowly down the hall and stairs. They shared one last glance before schooling their expressions to look as serious as possible when he finally appeared at the top of the family room steps, looking shell-shocked.
"Is everything okay now?" asked Amanda, only the slightest quiver in her voice.
Lee was still too stunned to notice. "Uh, Amanda? Do you want to go for a walk? We should talk."
"Of course, Sweetheart!" Amanda leapt to her feet, making sure not to look at her mother as she walked across the room and up the steps. She stepped past Lee and moved quickly out the front door, waiting for him to follow before taking his hand in hers. They walked down the front path and out onto the sidewalk in silence, turning in unison to head toward the park at the end of the street.
"I think that might have been the most uncomfortable conversation I've ever had in my life," said Lee finally. "And that includes the time my uncle found me half-naked with the base commander's daughter in the backseat of my car."
"So did you find out what was bothering him?" asked Amanda innocently, but obviously not quite innocently enough. Something in her voice made Lee stop dead and turn to look at her through narrowed eyes.
"You knew! You knew when you sent me up there!" he spluttered.
"Knew what, Sweetheart?" Amanda put on her best wide-eyed look.
"You knew they were going to give me a lecture on how I'd been leading you on and how you deserved better and how if I wasn't going to man up and marry you, I needed to let you down gently and get out of your life! Francine couldn't have done it better!"
Amanda couldn't control herself any longer, throwing her head back in howls of laughter. "They actually said that?" she finally gasped. "They told you to man up?"
"Yes, they did!" he answered indignantly. "And you sent me up there without any kind of warning!" He crossed his arms and glared at her. "I don't think I want to marry such a sneaky woman after all!"
"Oh Lee! You're marrying an entire sneaky family! Wait until you hear this…"
As Amanda began to tell him exactly what Jamie and Phillip had been up to all summer, three pairs of eyes watched carefully from their vantage point at the living room window that let them see all the way down the street to the park.
"Do you think he's asking?" Jamie was worried when they saw Lee cross his arms. "Maybe we scared him too much."
"I should have known your stupid idea wouldn't work," grumbled Phillip.
"Don't worry," said Dotty encouragingly, hiding her smile. "I think he might just be getting up his nerve."
Meanwhile, down the street, Lee was being given a whole new insight into family life.
"You're kidding!" Lee said finally in a stunned voice. "They parent-trapped us the whole summer just to get me to marry you?"
Amanda nodded. "They did. Welcome to the real-life Family Affair, Uncle Bill!"
"They might be sorry – they think they're getting Eddie's Father and I might turn out to be the Incredible Hulk."
Amanda gurgled with laughter. "What does that make Mother? My Favorite Martian?"
Lee reached out and took her hands in his. "But seriously, we can't disappoint them, can we?"
"No, I don't think we can," she agreed, eyes alight.
"Do you think they're watching?" Laughing hazel eyes met brown ones, brimming with love.
"I'd bet my entire paycheck on that."
Lee stepped closer and took her in his arms. "I love you."
Amanda looked up at him, beaming. "I love you too. So will you marry me? And my crazy family?"
"That would make me the happiest man in the world," he replied, lowering his head to kiss her.
If they'd been listening to anything except each other, they might have heard the whoops of delight coming from 4247 Maplewood Drive.