Part 1: Dissonance

Chapter 1: Introduction

Skyrim

4E 201

28th of Sun's Dawn

The rain poured on me, warm and sticky. Thick enough that droplets fell more like rivers, a sheet of water that threatened to drown. It touched all of me, soaked through and spread and made me feel like a part of it. My head hung between my shoulders towards the ground, I breathed through my mouth. Staring at the ground feeling warm, my heart felt clenched and suffocated under the streaming humid air.

I traced the soggy ground with my eyes. The trees had littered the ground with their pine needles and various leafs. They usually made the ground look sharp, but right now they looked defeated. It was an unusual spell, the humidity, especially coupled with the rain. I soaked up as much as I could. I liked the way the leaves now sagged and easily ripped as I moved my feet around. Almost as fulfilling as finding a perfectly dry leaf, with its satisfying smile-inducing loud crunch.

I smiled a little at the ground, working my feet against the leafs and needles, squishing the dirt. Little bubbles rose when I squished the ground, making little soft squelching noises in its extremely sodden state. I let out a small breath and laughed a little, my smile quirking its way up more, until I felt like a madwoman standing there. A wide uneven smile, my bare feet playing in the mud, hands in my trouser pockets. I stilled my feet and just wiggled my toes.

I closed my eyes, and faded my smile. Shadows moved like they always did behind my eyelids, a constant movement, but never the same. It never held a pattern. My lips parted slightly and inhaled as I raised my face to the sky, and the rain dived on my face. I held my breath and trailed my hands out of my pockets, then they rested at my sides for a moment. Again they picked up, I shakily brought them to my face and let them drop again. I released out a big sighing breath, opened my eyes and smiled again.

The rain was starting to thin.

I stood with my hands in my pockets again, waiting. My grandma would be out here soon, probably just realizing I was gone and knowing I was outside. When I heard the front door open behind me, I looked back over my shoulder and instead found my brother Mikael, his face sagging in faux annoyance.

"You know we aren't going to pay for your medicine if you get sick?"

"That's okay, I can always steal from grandma. She'll never know it was me." I continued starring at him with a straight face. He studied my face with squinting eyes.

Quickly he turned around and shouted into the house."Nana, Merete is going to steal all your precious jewels and sell them on the black market!"

Several empty seconds passed by until there was a slight shuffling and Nana's elderly voice shouted back "What?"

"I said SHE'S GOING TO STEAL ALL YOUR SHIT!" I looked at him slightly horrified and intensly excited. Immediately there was a angry pounding from inside the house coming towards Mikael, and we both shot out away from the house and into the surrounding forest giggling. We ran for a minute, just long enough to be far enough that Nana wouldn't bother going after us. We sat against a tree with our backs toward the house struggling to control our humor.

From here can be seen the valley extending from the farther parts of Whiterun Hold. The sun was peeking out behind the clouds and the rained had stopped. A breeze passed over the grass, smoothing over it, glossy and reminiscent of a lake. Elk drank from a far away stream and looked up in alarm at our clamorous approach. Squrriels and birds chirpped and flew and ran and mated through the trees. It's not too weird to think about mating squrriels, its just a part of life isn't it? It is however mildly embarrassing to think of people mating. And the only reason I can picture that is because my grandma gave me a very vivid description in order to "aid" my future marraige. Nana was very... personal like that. No boundries but often made her very endearing to the townsfolk.

Mikael distracted me from my random thoughts as he collected himself from the ground. He peered back towards the house to made sure that Nana didn't surprise us by actually following. It had happened once before, which followed with our collected squells as we attempted to dodge a stick she weilded against us.

"Well, what do you want to do for the rest of the afternoon as Nana forgets our foul language?" He said as he looked away from the house and started walking down into the valley.

I followed behind him slowly as I thought. "I didn't say the bad word this time, that was all you. But anyway, we can see what the Fairraven kids are doing." They were our go-to play friends, even if they were several years younger. You don't get to be very choosy when you live outside of a city or town's limit.

We eventually decided on visiting our closest neighbors, and upon arriving found them struggling with a medley of chores. The rest of the afternoon and evening was spent helping, joking, hindering their work and playing games together. The day grew darker almost without our notice.

iii

"Grandma, what are you doing opening the door? It's drenching out here, you're going to get the entry way wet." I said with ill humor.

Mikael and I returned home from the Fairravens' home later than planned that day, arriving well after sundown and joined halfway through by heavy rain. Our Nana greeted us in the entryway way with a seriously stern look and her wrinkled face- reminiscent of an improperly dried delicate dress.

She opened the door all the way for us, urging us in. "Come in quickly and take off your clothes."

I dipped my head in its little thank you as I crossed the threshold. Today she would let us off easy and dry our clothes for us in front of the fireplace. Mikael smiled at her as he came in, causing Nana to scowl heavier, further causing her wrinkles to transcend into the level of a hairless mammoth.

She closed the door and walked out the entry towards the quaint kitchen in the next room. I wringed my sopping dress before I traveled to my room to change into dry clothes. My room passed the kitchen and through the farthest door in the sitting room. Whiterun was a lot like the house. It never changed. Nice, quaint, comforting, and always the same. Months passed the same, with our weekly visit into Whiterun to sell jam to our favorite vendor on Sundas and my work at the Honeybrew Meadery. I worked weeks when they specified, which was most weeks the first half of the day. Our vendor in Whiterun landed me the job. He always made Grandma laugh, and I was grateful for that too. It only changed when Grandma couldn't go with me into town, because of one pain or another. And it changed when it became fall and winter. Those months were harder to live through because we couldn't make the jam, and we relied on making jewelry. Grandma had a collection of jewels, and every single time we put one into a necklace or ring or bracelet, I felt sad at her shrinking collection. Every once and awhile our favorite vendor would give her another, a present. But eventually, soon, It was going to run out.

I brought my wet clothes back to Nana, and she immediately set to wringing out the excess water before hanging it.

I sat down at the small table in the corner, where Mikael already sat, in dry clothes with wet slicked back hair. It reached to and past his ears and most of the way down his neck in the back. While straight and a dirty blond when wet, his hair was was wavy and golden blond when dry. I looked down at my pruned hands and started scratching at the skin in the palm of my hand.

"Merete?"

I looked up at Mikael. He looked at my hand dubiously. It bothered him, like it bothered most people. I put my hand in my lap and we continued to ignore each other for a moment.

Nana hung up the last of the clothes and sat down with us, sighing and rubbing her knee. Her anger was forgotten for now.

She blinked. "Ah," she said, turning towards me slowly. "Don't you think you should move out soon?" I almost choked on my spit. Mikael raised his eyebrows at us. He already had plans for the future, this conversation wasn't for him. I rolled my slightly tearing eyes at her, gave a short snort and responded.

"Shouldn't you be buying some chickens?" It was a little joke between us. The one time Grandma tried to buy us chickens so we could have constant eggs. It was a disaster.

She laughed. "Ohh I didn't mean it like that little wag," She said endearingly. "I mean you're seventeen years, shouldn't you be off adventuring?"

I laughed too. "That's just something little kids dream of doing when they are older, before signing up to the Legion and then wishing they could come back home." We both laughed in unison, loud and bright. Mikael chuckled along relunctently. The laughter died after a couple seconds but left little smiles. "I'd probably be eaten by wolves." I added thoughtfully, and we smiled at each other.

Nana fingered at the Amulet of Kyne around her neck absentmindedly. "You have a long life in you Merete, it's a shame for you to waste it with me."

I began picking at my palm again. "You need me, and I doubt I could do anything on my own Grandma." Not to mention that the thought slightly terrified me.

She paused her hand, thinking.Mikael shifted and settled further into his chair. Nana continued "I'm thinking I should move in with Godrod."

I guffawed abruptly. "I'm sure he would like that." I noted without thought, snickering. Grandma looked at me disapprovingly. I opened my mouth to speak, closed it, opened, closed again. I always thought grandma and our favorite vendor might be cute together, in an old couple way, and that she seemed to have some interest in him, but I didn't know she was-

Is she serious? I gave her a questioning look, which she responded to by reaching for a water pitcher and filling a cup. I opened my mouth to speak, closed it once again like an idiot. I didn't know she was that interested in him.

"I'm getting to be too old to manage on my own. Mikael is getting his life together and you are too old to be taking care of me. You could have married a noble by now."

That was admittedly not anything I was expecting her to say. Maybe my old dry heart has finally learned to love again, but marriage? I smiled tightly at the mention. It somehow almost seems like a waste of my life, but so does staying here, and she knew I thought so. We sat there in my uncomfortable silence.