Star Wars the Clone Wars Fan Fiction
The Adventures of Stew and Zippy
Do not lose hope, no matter how dire the circumstance.
Hopeless! Senator Amidala is still missing. She has been kidnapped, but her whereabouts are unknown. General Skywalker's Padawan, Ahsoka Tano, has been held hostage by General Grievous, and her fate is in his hands. Anakin Skywalker has no one to turn to for help to rescue Ahsoka, and he has no leads as to where Senator Amidala might be. Things are looking grim for the Republic.
One month earlier…
"Alright men," Captain Arrow said, addressing his men. "We have a new recruit today, fresh from Kamino. Don't give him too much of a hard time." Captain Arrow's men chuckled. "The war is heating up, so they keep pushing younger and younger men out into the front lines. I don't know how this new recruit is going to be but keep an open mind." Outside a ship landed with the new recruit. "You're all dismissed," Captain Arrow said. He walked over to the ship. A clone stepped out and saluted him. "What's your name, soldier?"
"CT 4815162342, Sir!" he said standing at attention.
"Good, very good. The boys are all in the mess hall now. I heard that today's lunch is some sort of stew. You'll be staying in Rusty's barracks on the West Wing."
"Yes, Sir!"
"You're dismissed." The new recruit entered the building and went into the mess hall. Captain Arrow took off his helmet to reveal an arrow-shaped scar stretching from his right eyebrow to his left cheek. He smiled. This new recruit wasn't so bad after all.
O
CT 4815162342 entered the mess hall. A clone came up to him, "My name's Rusty. You'll be stayin' in my barracks in the West Wing."
"Yes, sir."
"No need for the formality now, shiny," Rusty said. He walked over to a table. The new recruit followed. Rusty sat down and took off his helmet to reveal a headful of rusty colored hair. While the new recruit was meeting Rusty's men, one of the more mischievous clones said to his friend,
"Hey, we should see if this new rookie has a backbone."
"What do you mean?"
"Food fight!" the mischievous clone, known as Zippy, hollered throwing his bowl of unfinished stew across to Rusty's table. Chaos ensued. Some clones threw food; some tried to stop the food fight, but failed and ultimately became part of the food fight themselves. The new recruit didn't know what to do. Suddenly, he got an idea. He ran over to the kitchen and grabbed the giant bowl with all of the stew in it, ran back into the mess hall, and just dumped the stew all over the mess hall. Many of the clones laughed.
In the hallway, Captain Arrow heard a commotion coming from the mess hall. He entered. It immediately grew silent. That is when he saw all of the stew scattered across the mess hall floor.
"Who is responsible for this?!" There was an awkward silence. Everyone turned to look at the new recruit. "Did you do this?" Captain Arrow asked the rookie.
"Yes, sir," he said quietly.
"Come with me," the captain said. The new recruit followed. The captain took the rookie to his office. "You know, there are some rules here. For starters, do not pour a giant bowl of stew all over the mess hall! You will clean up the mess hall."
"Yes, sir."
"Immediately."
The rookie quickly left. He spent all afternoon cleaning up the mess hall. When he finally arrived into Rusty's barracks, the men all greeted him. He was confused. He just broke the rules. He approached Rusty, "Sir," he said tentatively.
"Yes, soldier?"
"Why are all the men being nice to me? I just broke the rules."
Rusty chuckled. "You left quite the first impression. Many of the men liked what you did. Plus, we need that kind of creativity and risk on the battlefield." Rusty paused, "Also, it appears that you have earned yourself a new name, shiny!"
"What is it?"
"Stew."
"Stew?"
Rusty laughed, "Welcome to the barracks, Stew!"
O
Present Day
The outpost at which Stew lived in did not see much action. It was already in a Republican planet that was heavily guarded, so it was strange when Stew noticed something off about the radar. The radar was the exact same every day. Stew had taken different shifts watching the radar, and it had taken him only a month to realize something was wrong. It was on one of these shifts that Stew decided to bring this up.
"Hey, Zippy," Stew said.
"What?" Zippy said flipping through the radio channels.
"You know we're only supposed to use that to receive transmissions, not listen to the radio."
"Is that what you wanted to tell me?" Zippy settled on a station that was playing heavy metal.
"No. I wanted to show you something about the radar."
Zippy rolled his eyes, but scooted his chair next to Stew.
"I've noticed that the radar is on a loop."
"What do you mean 'a loop'?"
"Well, look," Stew said gesturing to the radar screen.
"I don't see anything unusual."
"This scans around the entire planet, right?"
"Yup."
"Well watch that ship out the window. The big one. I think it's a cargo ship."
"The one taking off?"
"Pretty big, right?"
Zippy shrugged, "I guess."
"We should be able to noticeably see it on the radar."
"Well, yeah."
"But watch; we won't."
Zippy gave Stew a look that said, "Whatever, man," but he looked at the radar anyway. The ship took off and entered space. They should have seen it appear on the radar screen, but they did not see it at all. They waited a few minutes. "Maybe it's just a mistake or somethin'," Zippy said.
"That's what I thought at first too, but look. We should be able to see that one appear, too, right?" Stew said pointing to another big ship taking off outside. Zippy and Stew watched the radar, yet it did not appear.
"Okay this is weird," Zippy said.
"Wait," Stew said. "It gets even weirder."
"I just knew you were gonna say that."
"Every day at eleven past ten in the morning, a small meteor shower appears. It's nothing serious, but it is the exact same meteor shower at that exact same time every day." Zippy looked at the clock.
"It's almost eleven past ten now!" And sure enough, when the clock changed to 10:11, a small meteor shower appeared on the radar screen. "Whoa! This is way weird!"
"I told you the radar was on a loop," Stew said. "Someone doesn't want us to see what's outside of the planet."
"We need to tell Captain Arrow!"
"I agree."
"Let's go." They left the radar station and headed towards Captain Arrow's office. They both hesitated. Stew finally knocked on the door.
"Hello?" Stew said, "Captain Arrow?" The captain opened the door.
"Hey, boys," he said. "Aren't you supposed to be on radar duty?"
"We are, sir," Zippy said. "But we noticed something strange."
Captain Arrow was about to answer them, when something beeped inside his office. "Sorry guys," he said. "I have to take this." Then Captain Arrow closed the door. Zippy and Stew exchanged a look.
"Well, we have to do something!" Stew said.
"We can wait until he's done, and then we'll tell him," Zippy said.
"Well, okay."
O
Stew and Zippy waited outside Captain Arrow's office for half an hour. "I wonder what's taking so long," Stew said.
Zippy shrugged. "You wanna go down to the mess hall. It's almost lunch time anyway." They walked down to the mess hall and started to eat their lunches. The rest of the men eventually came and began to eat, too. Half way through lunch, Captain Arrow came in.
"Alright, boys," he said. "I have an announcement to make." Stew and Zippy exchanged a look. "We are having a routine inspection coming over tomorrow." The men groaned. "Usually it would be no big deal, but it's the Wolf Team. I've heard that they are pretty harsh on their inspections." The men groaned louder. "Everything should be fine, but I am going to inspect the entire outpost myself before they come, so be ready."
"This is bad," Stew said.
Zippy laughed, "Of all the weeks for there to be an inspection, it had to be this one. This is kinda funny."
Stew gave him this look that said, "This isn't funny at all!"
Zippy stopped laughing.
"Seriously," Stew said. "What are we gonna do?!"
Zippy's familiar mischievous smile appeared.
"Oh no," Stew said. "I know that look, and no. I'm not doing whatever you have planned. Just no."
"Here me out!"
Stew sighed, "Fine."
"Did you know that the outpost has a hangar downstairs?"
"Zippy…" Stew warned.
"I was thinking that maybe we should take the ship in there and just take a look in space and see what's really up there."
"No!" Stew exclaimed. "No way!"
"We would have to do it tonight so we could be done before the inspection," Zippy said thoughtfully.
"And I already told you no!"
"Aw, c'mon," Zippy said. "It'll be fun. Where's that clone that poured the stew all over the mess hall?"
"Zippy," Stew said. "Even if we did do this, what would we see up there?"
"I don't know," Zippy said excitedly. "But that's the fun part. Plus, we never do anything in this outpost! I finally wanna do something! This is what we are made for! C'mon, Stew! It'll be great!"
Stew hesitated. Zippy noticed.
"We can't bother the captain like this before an inspection. He said that he was going to personally inspect the outpost. He has enough on his plate as it already is. This'll just make things harder for him."
"Alright, but we do this tonight," Stew said. "We make it quick. And quiet."
"No one will know," Zippy said reassuring Stew.
"Right," Stew said, "No one will know." But Stew still had a bad feeling about this.
O
That night, just after midnight, Stew quietly crept through the barracks. He was about to exit the West Wing when he heard a noise behind him. He quickly spun around.
"Going somewhere, soldier?" Rusty asked seriously.
"Um, well, sir," Stew said. "I was just a bit hungry, so I was going to the mess hall for a snack!"
Rusty raised an eyebrow, skeptical. "Alright. Be back in ten minutes. Remember, we have an inspection this week, do NOT mess anything up."
Stew saluted, "Yes, sir!" He quickly left the barracks and went down to the mess hall, waited a few seconds, and then met Zippy at the rendezvous point – the door to the hangar.
"What took you so long?" Zippy asked.
"Rusty saw me leaving! He thinks that I am eating at the mess hall. He told me to be gone for ten minutes! Maybe we shouldn't do this. We are going to get into some serious trouble!"
"Are you wimpin' out on me, Stew?" Zippy said in a challenging tone.
"Maybe you should do this. Alone. Without me."
"No," Zippy said and then opened the hangar door. "We are in this together. Besides, it was you who discovered the radar trouble anyway."
Stew hesitated. Then he went into the hangar with Zippy right behind him. Zippy closed the door and they continued into the hangar. "It's really dark in here," Stew said.
"Here we go!" Zippy said turning on the lights. The hangar was bigger than Stew first imagined. He thought it would be able to maybe hold three ships, but it could easily hold five. "Well that's disappointing," Zippy said gesturing to the one small ship inside. "That could barely hold ten clankers!" The ship was an older model. It was small, but it looked like it could fly.
"We need to hurry," Stew said. He quickly walked up to the ship, opened it, and climbed in.
"Wait, Stew!" Zippy said from across the hangar. "You forgot something!" Zippy pressed a rectangular button on the wall and the hangar door opened revealing a beautiful night sky. "Okay," Zippy said walking into the ship. "Let's go." They both sat down at the ship's controls.
"So," Stew said. "What now?"
Zippy's familiar mischievous grin spread across his face, and before Stew could even take a breath to say anything, Zippy grabbed the controls and yanked them forward. They were both pushed into the backs of their seats as the ship flew very quickly out of the hangar. Zippy laughed, "Yeah!" he shouted joyfully.
Stew was breathless, but smiling. The city below looked so small! They kept going higher and higher. "Where did you learn to fly?" Stew asked Zippy.
"Nowhere. I'm just guessing."
"Wait, what?"
Zippy sped up, and the ship roughly exited the atmosphere.
"That was too rough, Zippy!"
Zippy didn't say anything. Stew looked angrily over at him, and saw him gaping at the scene in front of them. Stew looked up. There was an entire Separatist battle fleet in front the planet! How had they not noticed?! "This is crazy," Stew said quietly. "What are we going to do?"
"I don't know," Zippy replied.
"We need to go back," Stew said. "Right now!"
"I'm trying!" Zippy said panicked. "None of the controls are working!" Zippy desperately banged on the controls. Stew joined in.
"This is not good!" Stew said.
"Oh, really?" Zippy said sarcastically.
"Zippy, look! We are going to collide into that Separatist cruiser!"
"Whatdowedo?! Whatdowedo?! Whatdowedo?!"
"We're gonna crash right into the middle of this cruiser! I knew this was a bad idea!"
"How have they not noticed?! We are going to kill ourselves!"
"Maybe there's an escape pod!" Stew suggested.
"I already checked," Zippy said. "There isn't one!" They both stared straight ahead at the cruiser that they were about to run into. "Hey," Zippy said. "Is that General Grievous in there?!"
"We need to move to the back of the ship," Stew said wisely. They both scrambled out of their chairs and raced to the back of the ship. While they were running there was a loud crash and a flash of light. They were both thrown forward. Air was rapidly leaving the ship. They both groaned and stood up.
"We need to get into the Separatist cruiser, so we don't die in here," Zippy said.
"But we'll die in there!"
"One thing at a time, Stew!" They ran to the front of the ship, and saw that they had really wedged that small ship into the cruiser. It was easy for them to enter the cruiser. Alarms were going off along with red flashing lights. "Clankers!" Zippy said, pointing to some droids coming down the hallway to their left. Stew and Zippy both open fired. They quickly shot the droids down.
"I'm glad we brought these," Stew said about their blaster guns.
"We need to get to the escape pods!" Zippy said breaking into a run.
"Do you know where they are?"
"I think so." They continued to run down the hall when Zippy suddenly stopped. "Hold on," he said. "Maybe we're going the wrong way."
"What?!"
Zippy chuckled, "Oh yeah, we are. We're heading to the bridge. My bad!"
"Zippy we're about to die!" Stew said exasperated. "How are you okay with that?!"
Zippy shrugged, "It's how I deal with stress, okay?"
"Hey!" someone shouted. Zippy and Stew looked behind themselves. A young girl was running towards them. "We need to leave! General Grievous is coming!" she said frantically. General Grievous roared in the distance.
"Okay," Stew said. "Let's go." The girl immediately took the lead.
"Who are you?" Zippy said.
"Ahsoka," she replied. "Ahsoka Tano."
O
Five minutes earlier…
Ahsoka was doomed. She was on her knees, her hands in binders, and General Grievous was coming to kill her. His four lightsabers whirled like windmills of death. "General!" a droid said to General Grievous. He ignored it. "General! We have incoming!" General Grievous stopped walking.
"What?" Suddenly the whole ship shook and the lights momentarily dimmed. Ahsoka took this moment to blast General Grievous with the Force and run quickly out of the bridge. She was running down the hallway when she saw two clones standing there. They seemed to be arguing about something.
"Hey!" she shouted. The clones turned around to face her. She ran up towards them, "We need to leave! General Grievous is coming!" As if on cue, General Grievous roared in the distance.
"Okay," one of the clones said. "Let's go." Ahsoka started to run toward the escape pods. The clones followed.
"Who are you?" the other clone asked.
"Ahsoka," she replied. "Ahsoka Tano."
"Well I'm Zippy," he said. "And this here is Stew." They continued to run to the escape pods. All the droids they passed were too busy trying to repair the ship and such to notice the two clones and a Padawan racing down the hallway. They finally reached the escape pods.
"You first," Stew said to Ahsoka. She got in. Zippy went in and then Stew. Ahsoka pressed a button inside of the escape pod and it jettisoned away from the Separatist cruiser.
"There are so many Separatist ships up here!" Zippy said. "I wonder what they are doing!"
"It looks like they are preparing for battle," Ahsoka said.
"How did you get stuck on a Separatist cruiser?" Stew said.
"It's a long story, but basically I was on this mission for the Jedi, and things took a weird turn," she explained. "What about you guys?"
Stew and Zippy exchanged a look. "Well," Zippy said. "We were kinda on a mission of our own."
Stew just shook his head.
"Does this thing have a transmitter?" Zippy said looking at the escape pod's controls.
"Yeah," Ahsoka said. "I should contact the Jedi." Ahsoka pressed a few buttons. Nothing happened. "Ug!" she said frustratedly. "The Separatist are still jamming the transmissions."
"I don't think that's intentional," Stew said thoughtfully.
Zippy and Ahsoka looked at Stew. "I think they are jamming the radars on the nearby planets."
"Oh!" Zippy said. "That makes sense."
"What do you mean?" Ahsoka said.
"The Separatist are jamming the radars so the planets nearby don't realize that there is an entire Separatist fleet above them."
"Yeah," Zippy said. "Stew and I were on that planet there. We were in a Republican outpost and everything, but we didn't realize there was an entire Separatist fleet just outside of the planet."
"And you two were sent to investigate what was up here?" Ahsoka said.
"Somethin' like that," Zippy said.
"Well," Stew said. "Now what?" They all stared out of the escape pod, looking at the strange scene before them.
O
Meanwhile…
The Wolf Pack was in hyperspace heading towards a planet for a routine inspection. A routine inspection! How had they been stuck with routine inspection?! Commander Wolffe sighed. They had already inspected twelve other bases. Ever since Jedi Master Plo Koon had taken a mission in the Outer Rim, the Wolf Pack has had nothing to do. Wolffe was REALLY tired of it. Wolffe sighed again.
"Are you alright, Commander? You seem to be sighing quite a lot," one of Wolffe's men said wittingly.
"I'm alright, Poncho," Commander Wolffe said. "I am just sick of these routine inspections."
"Do you want some food?!" Poncho yelled from the back of the ship. He was rummaging through the pantry.
"Poncho!" Wolfef said. "That food is for emergency only!"
"What?" Poncho said emerging from the back eating a bag of crunchy food.
Wolffe rolled his eyes. Ever since Poncho joined the Wolf Pack, things have been….interesting. "Poncho," Wolffe commanded. "Sit down! We are coming out of hyperspace!" Poncho sat down in an unmannerly fashion. Wolffe sighed again. This was going to be a long day. The Wolf Pack was greeted with the view of a Separatist fleet preparing for battle. There were three cruisers and all sorts of other battle ships. Wolf was about to tell his men to retreat when Poncho said,
"Sir, I can't be sure, but I think I see a Separatist ship over there!"
"Poncho!" Wolffe said. "This is serious!"
"I know!" Poncho replied. "I am serious!"
"Look!" Wolffe said. "An escape pod. We need to go over there and see who is inside it. Maybe it will help to explain all of this." Wolffe guided the ship stealthily towards the escape pod. "Is that Senator Amidala?!" Wolffe said surprised. "We need to get that escape pod!"
"Neh," Poncho proclaimed. "Is she really necessary?"
Wolffe groaned. "Yes, Poncho," Wolffe said. "She is very necessary." Wolffe expertly docked the escape pod to the Wolf Pack's ship. "Alright," Wolffe said. "Poncho, let's go see if the Senator is alright." Wolffe and Poncho headed down to where the escape pod had been docked. The other men stayed with the controls to keep the ship flying, and hopefully hidden, from the Separatists. Wolffe opened the escape pod. The senator wasn't alone. Two kids were with her. One girl and one boy. "Senator," Wolffe said helping Senator Amidala out of the escape pod. "Are you alright?"
Padmé smoothed out her clothes, "Yes," she said. "I'm fine." The two kids emerged. Wolffe realized that they were teenagers. Great. The kids looked around.
"Who are they?" Wolffe said quietly to Senator Amidala. She looked back at the kids.
"I'm not entirely sure," she said. "They were with Ahsoka, General Skywalker's Padawan."
"Where is Ahsoka?"
"She's stuck on one of those Separatist cruisers!"
Wolffe sighed. This was not good.
"Hiya, kids!" Poncho said way too enthusiastically.
Savannah and Trevor exchanged a look. "Uh," Trevor said. "Hi?"
"Follow me," Wolffe said leading them all into a room with a single table. "Stay here."
"Commander Wolffe," Senator Amidala said. "Wait! We need to rescue Ahsoka."
"With all due respect, senator," Wolffe said. "There is an entire Separatist fleet out there! We will never be able to reach her alive. We need to leave and come back with a proper rescue team with proper rescue equipment." Suddenly, a clone came rushing into the room.
"Commander!" he said desperately. "You need to see this." Wolffe followed him. Of course they all followed. They all piled into the control room just in time to see a small old fashioned ship collide with one of the three Separatist cruisers.
"What was that?!" Trevor asked.
"No idea," Commander Wolffe said.
"Ahsoka's in there!" Savannah said. They all looked at the Separatist cruiser.
"Sir! We've been spotted!"
"Then get us out of here!"
"No!" Savannah shouted. "What about Ahsoka?!"
"Sorry, kid," Commander Wolffe said, "but I make the rules here and we need to leave. There is an entire Separatist battle fleet out there and there is a very important Republican senator in our ship. We need to leave." Commander Wolffe sat down and made the jump into hyperspace.
"Where are we going?" Savannah asked.
"Back to the Senate. They will decide what to do," Wolffe said. "And the Jedi. They will know what to do, too."
O
It didn't take Ahsoka long to figure out how to control the escape pod. The escape pod had a small amount of fuel, and she directed the escape pod towards the nearest planet.
"I can't believe the Seppies haven't shot us down yet," Zippy said.
"Good point," Ahsoka said. "Maybe they are more focused on something else."
"I wonder what it is," Stew said.
"Speaking of wondering," Zippy said, "I wonder what the guys at the outpost are doing."
"Why?" Ahsoka asked.
"Well, um," Stew said. "We may have gone on this, uh, 'mission' without permission."
Zippy laughed, "Hey, Stew! You are a poet and you didn't even know it!"
"That's not funny, Zippy."
"So," Ahsoka said. "You're saying you didn't inform your commander that you were taking a ship into space!"
Zippy shrugged.
"Uh, yeah," Stew said.
"Well, I guess it's kind of a good thing because I would be dead if you didn't crash the ship into the Separatist cruiser," Ahsoka said.
"Oh man!" Stew said. "How are we going to explain to Captain Arrow why we don't have his ship?!"
"Relax, Stew," Zippy said. "We saved a Jedi's life. That'll take away some of the punishment."
"I've met a lot of clones," Ahsoka said. "But you two are some of the strangest clones that I have ever met."
"Thanks," Zippy said smiling.
"That's not a compliment!" Stew said.
"It depends on how you look at it," Zippy retorted.
"We're entering the atmosphere," Ahsoka said. The escape pod immediately began to experience major drag. As they got closer to the ground Ahsoka noticed something, "We are coming in pretty fast."
"I don't think the parachute deployed!" Stew exclaimed.
"Uh, oh," Zippy said. "We're getting real close to the ground."
"It looks pretty rocky!" Stew said.
"Ahsoka," Zippy said. "Can you use the Force or something?"
"I don't know," she said. "I'll try." Ahsoka concentrated. The escape pod slowed down a little.
"It's not working!" Stew said. The ground was suddenly very close. There was a large crash as the escape pod hit the rocky ground.
O
Stew woke up. It was very white and very bright. His eyes slowly focused on his surroundings. He was in a hospital. The one in the outpost. Stew attempted to sit up.
"I wouldn't do that if I were you." Stew looked over. Rusty was standing in the doorway. He walked inside. "I was wondering when you were going to wake up."
"What happened?" Stew asked.
"After you crashed we found your escape pod." Rusty saw the look on Stew's face. "Don't worry, the others are fine."
"What about the Separatist fleet?"
Rusty sighed. "The plan is a surprise attack. Who knows how that will go?"
"Where are Zippy and Ahsoka?"
"They're in the mess hall."
"I have to see them!"
"I advise against it, but you don't seem to follow the rules well, do you?"
Stew paused. He looked at Rusty.
"Captain Arrow will give you your punishment later," Rusty said. "Now go see your friends."
O
Stew rushed into the mess hall to find Ahsoka and Zippy eating together. It looked like Zippy had broken his left ankle. Ahsoka had a bandage around her right arm. Stew smiled. The injuries were small. Stew had only broken his right wrist. Zippy noticed Stew's presence.
"Hey, there!" Zippy said happily.
Ahsoka smiled and waved at Stew.
"Hi, guys," Stew said. He sat down, "How are you doing?"
"Meh," Zippy said stabbing his food. "This food is well, very mushy."
Ahsoka smiled. That made Stew happy. They both seemed okay. "My master is coming to pick me up sometime." Ahsoka said. "It will have to be after the surprise attack on that Separatist fleet, though."
"Well," Stew said. "You are more than welcome to stay here."
They all smiled.
The End