Have you ever gone away somewhere, maybe for a few days , and when you come back realise how much you truly missed someone? That happened to me.

I left Summer Bay on my 19th Birthday.

I was young then and believed that once I got out of this sleepy, old town I would have all night parties, get drunk and go home with random guys, maybe find a future husband. I found out I was wrong, sure I got the future husband after a year in the city; it was like an impulse buy! I met a cute, charming, 29 year old lawyer in a bar and after 6 months I was Mrs. Matilda Lang, much to everyone's surprise but the parties never happened, well at least not the lively ones I was hoping for and it was a disgrace to get blind drunk at a dinner party apparently.

Later the holidays in Barbados, big houses and fast cars became the most important things in my life besides shopping…and I thought Summer Bay could be a drag! I had become a material girl, like all those sitcoms you watch where there will always be the spoilt wife who gets whatever she wants whenever she wants. I had became Northern Beaches very own Julie Cooper. I had all the money I wanted but I wasn't happy. No matter how many designer bag's, shoes or clothes I bought I just couldn't smile, well not the way I used to.

Soon Gregg took up a job in a firm in Yabbie Creek; he thought the problem was I was missing my family. Like I said he thought. It wasn't that I didn't miss them, it was just that I missed someone else more, Him.

I knew he had gotten married much like the way I did, to the girl he had an insane affair with after he spilt with Cassie. She had become pregnant not long after the affair ended and we had got together, she turned up on the doorstep a month and two days before my 19th.

And she blew my life apart.

It had been a month since his past had been revealed that I decided to leave. I had been sitting on the lounge not willing to move or talk to anyone, just like I had spent most of my days. My step-dad, Tony, came into the room and sat beside me. He slowly pulled me onto his lap and stroked my long blonde hair, soothing me. I remember telling him that I always thought that he was my prince and that I was in some fairytale. He whispered into my ear:

'We all can make our own fairytales'

This is my fairytale. A story that will prove the difference between loving what you see on the outside and loving what is on the inside.

This is my story.

I left Summer Bay on my 19th birthday.

I returned a week before my 26th.

I began to destroy myself 8 days later.

-Xxx-

Lust Is When You Love What You See. Love Is When You Lust For What's Inside

-Xxx-