My Edward will never be as perfect as Stephenie Meyer's, but I try my best.
Venom ruined it for me. Just one bite, and I was done for. I could have died, but I lived. A damned creature with no soul. A blood curdling blood sucker. Who in their right of mind would ever love me for real?
This was a joke. It had to be. If she really knew what I was... If she really took it seriously... I should have warned her. I did warn her, but I'm to selfish. I let her into my life when I should have pushed her out.
Why did I have to do that?
I was going to lose her one day, why not now? Why not just go now instead of saving it for later? Because I lover her. She loves me... I can't go.
I have to. Sooner rather than later, right? yes, of course.
No. Never ever leave her. Who cares what others do?
I do...
But I have to leave. I have let this go on for far to long. The second I realized I loved her, I should have left. I should have never given myself the chance.
But I had to. I wont leave, nothing bad will happen to her.
Yes. Loads of bad things will happen to her. I have to leave, to save us both.
But that's not saving us both!
Yes it is! Well maybe not me, but humans can move on. She's human?! For goodness sakes. She's food, not something you love.
But you can always love food.
Oh shut up! I should have left a very long time ago. This has gone too far. She's almost been eaten twice by vampires. I have to convince her that I don't love her any more... But how do I do that?
"Edward?" Carlisle's voice brought me back to reality. "Have you decided?"
I sighed and tried to buckle down and find the answer. They were all waiting expectantly for me to say something. Esme, Alice, Emmett, and Carlise were all betting on me to say that we stay. Rosalie of course thought I should have drank her dry ages ago, and Jasper was still drowning in shame.
"We go." I said firmly. "As soon as possible. Now." Everyones thoughts drifted sadly into a pool of unhappiness, except Rosalie's. "You guys go ahead and leave first. I'll stay a few days to sort things out with Bella."
No one bothered to say anything. They all knew it was useless arguing with me. I wouldn't back down from my decision. This was what was best for Bella. She would be safe. She would move on. She couldn't really love me that much, could she?