Dave was bent over his desk, focusing on some paperwork that he had yet to finish, when someone knocked heavily on his door. Looking up, he saw JJ and Cruz standing in the threshold and he beckoned them inside, the warm smile that naturally came to his face dying as he saw the serious expressions they wore. "Am I in some sort of trouble?" he asked with a laugh, relaxing back in his chair in an effort to hide his concern.
"No, nothing like that, Dave," JJ said softly as she closed the door behind them. It was an odd move for her to make, and he wondered again just what they were doing in his office. "We have some news for you, something I should have told you long before this, but couldn't."
"I'm afraid that I don't understand, Jen. What is going on here?"
She sank into a chair across from his desk, sadness beginning to overtake the seriousness. Cruz cleared his throat, and Dave focused his attention on their Section Chief. There was something shifty about his face and he felt his eyes narrow as a small flicker of anger flamed to life in his chest. "I was the one who swore her to secrecy. Take it out on me, Dave. Erin didn't lose her life to the Replicator, but she is about to be taken off life support."
Dave felt the blood rush to his ears, blocking out any other words they may have said to him. His Erin, the last love of his life, was still alive. He looked over at JJ and saw that she was crying, and this seemed to break him out of his stupor. "Care to run that by me again, Jen?"
"After John Curtis forced Erin to ingest his alcohol-MDMA mixture, she fell into a deep coma. The State Department thought it more prudent to declare her dead and try to hunt Curtis down, then to put her into further potential danger." JJ took a deep breath, glancing over at Cruz. "Matt had the final call, and it was a decision that I would have made as well. Curtis was hell-bent on destroying her life, and if he had had any accomplices, we didn't want to risk her life."
"I see. And does her family know that she's alive?"
"Yes. They were also sworn to secrecy. I'm so, so, sorry, Dave."
He expelled a harsh breath as he shook his head. "No. That's not good enough. Dammit, Jen, you did the same fucking thing to me that you did to Reid. Twice, you've torn out hearts and stomped on them. I don't care what Cruz thinks, you are at fault here."
"She's dying now, Dave. Her doctor is saying that she's in a persistent vegetative state and is unlikely to wake up. Her children decided to pull the plug, and let her slip away peacefully. They don't want her to suffer any longer."
Cruz's words tore into his hearts like daggers and he felt the first tears begin to roll down his cheeks. "What?"
"Yes. She's really dying this time, Dave. I thought that you would want to say goodbye."
He looked away from Cruz, folding his hands over his stomach as he took a moment to collect his thoughts. "Of course. I'm going to need time off, I'm not leaving her side until she's gone this time. I won't let her die alone."
"I thought you would say that, Dave. I've already arranged for you to have all the time off that you need."
He barely acknowledged Cruz's words as he pushed himself away from his desk and stood. "I won't need to go home and pack, I can just live out of my go bag for the time being." Dave was talking to himself, but he caught JJ's nod of agreement and struggled not to roll his eyes.
"You shouldn't drive, Dave. I don't think it would be safe for you right now." He glared at Cruz, ready to sock him, and the man glared right back. "I'll have Anderson take you to Washington Memorial. I already called ahead, her doctor is expecting you there."
He gave the man a stiff nod as he went over to his closet and pulled out his bag, slinging it over his shoulder. JJ reached out to him, resting her hand on his upper arm, and he shrugged the hand off, not ready to make nice with the woman, not after she had kept him from Erin for all these months.
Agent Anderson also appeared to be in on things, as he was waiting for him at the foot of the stairs. "Hello, Sir. I was told that I would need to be on driving detail for you today. Where are we going?"
Then again, maybe the young man didn't know anything. "Yes, we're heading to Washington Memorial. I have one last duty to fulfill to my love."
"Sir?"
"Anderson, you can call me Rossi or Dave." He nodded. "And I was just informed that Erin, my bella Erin, is for the moment still on this earth. I won't let her slip away without me by her side. That happened once already."
The young man nodded a few times as he led them out of the bullpen and over to the elevators. Just as the doors opened, Garcia rushed out, a look of pure sorrow on her face. "Is it true? Tell me, Dave. Is it true?"
He nodded. "Yeah, Kitten. And they're pulling the plug today."
"I'm coming with you." She reached out for his hand and clasped it tightly. "I haven't forgotten Chief Cruz's words to me, that day we first met. She respected me, Dave." Her words broke off, and he knew that she was crying. Squeezing her hand, he tugged her closer, letting her rest her head on his shoulder.
"She adored you, Kitten. Ever since the bank heist, you were just this bright light in her life. Just like you are a bright light in mine."
She nodded and they fell silent for the entire ride down to the parking garage. Anderson led them over to his car, and Dave sat with Garcia in the back, rubbing her arm gently as Anderson drove through the heavy morning traffic. There didn't seem to be any words to say to comfort Garcia or himself, so they stayed silent.
Finally, Anderson let them off in front of the hospital and he took hold of Garcia's hand once more, leading her over the information desk. "Hello, my name is David Rossi, and I'm here to see Erin Strauss."
The volunteer tapped away at her computer, frowning slightly after a few moments. Looking back up at them, she shook her head. "I don't have a patient by that name, sir. Are you certain you're at the right hospital?"
Dave pulled out his credentials and handed them over to the young woman. Her eyes widened as she nodded and then called over a security guard. "Yes, Sarah?"
"These kind people need to be shown to our special visitor."
The guard nodded and Sarah handed his badge back to him. Penelope gave her a weak smile and they quickly followed after the silent man. They were led to a secluded elevator and the guard took them up to the seventh floor. "She's sleeping in room seven seventy seven," the taciturn man said as he led them off the elevators and opened a double door set with a key.
"Thank you," Garcia replied, taking the lead. The room Erin rested in was at the end of the hall, and Dave took a deep breath, wondering if he could face what he was going to see in that room. "She'll know you're here, you know. Even if she never opens her eyes ever again."
"How is it that you know the prayer of my heart, Penelope?"
"I'm your fairy godmother, I should know every little secret you harbor in that head of yours." Her voice was barely a whisper, and he knew in that moment it was taking everything in her not to break down in tears, that the small joke was made to keep her on even keel.
"All right, then, let's head inside." He opened the door and tried to suppress the gasp that came to his lips. Erin looked so small, lying amidst the tubes and wires that monitored her life signs. The stillness of the room bothered him, and he squeezed Penelope's hand all the tighter in an effort to keep from sobbing at that sight of her thin body, her limp hair, her closed eyes.
"I'm glad that they reached you, Papa Dave." He looked over at Tabitha and took in her red-rimmed eyes, her hunched shoulders. "It's been eating at me, you know, not telling you that Momma was alive, that there was still some slim hope that she would awaken and be all right. That hope is gone now. Karen and Bruce want to let her go. I'm not ready, Papa."
It was those words that made him cry and he opened his arms to the tiny blonde, letting her burrow close to him as she sobbed. "I'm not ready, either, lambkin," he whispered before kissing her temple lightly. "But we'll do it together, okay?"
She nodded and he led them over to her chair, taking a seat. He wasn't really surprised when she curled up in his lap, she had always been the more affectionate of the Strauss children, and had taken to him right away. "This is worse, you know, then her just dying in New York. This is too real."
"I know, Tabby, I know." Gently, he rocked her back and forth, feeling just how much weight she, too, had lost in the last few months. "When are they doing it?"
"As soon as Bruce and Karen get here. I stayed the night, her doctor let me sleep next to her. I pretended that she was holding me, that she was awake and present. Papa, why does she have to leave us?"
Dave had no answer for her, he only could rub her back tenderly as Penelope sank down in the chair next to them. She reached out and rested her hand on his shoulder, the warmth bleeding through his clothes and into his skin. "Tabitha, do you want to give Dave some time to say goodbye now? It might be easier to do so without everyone here and hovering."
Tabitha shook her head and strengthened her grip around his neck. "No. I can't leave her, not even for a moment."
"It's fine, Kitten. Anything I have to say can be done in front of the two of you." He took a deep breath. "Erin, bella Erin, I'm here this time. I won't leave until you're gone, even if you can't talk to me. I love you. I wish I had known, for all these months, that you were still with us, I would have read you love poems, sang you songs, told you everything that's in my heart. You're taking my spot, next to Caroline. I want the loves of my life to be together, sharing stories about how stubborn I am, what an ass I can, how much I loved you all."
He choked up, unable to continue, and Tabitha kissed his cheek softly. "She knew. She knew that you loved her, even if you guys didn't get around to saying those words."
Dave nodded and slid forward on his chair, reaching out and grasping Erin's hand tightly. It was warm, though limp, and he longed for a miracle that would allow her to squeeze his hand, open her eyes, have her speak just a few words to him one last time before she joined the angels.
They sat like that for a long time, until the door opened once more, revealing Karen, Bruce, and a serious looking doctor. Tabitha clung to him even more, turning her face into his shoulder so as not to look at her siblings. "I'm glad you're here, Dave," Karen said softly, sounding so much like her mother in that moment that he had to swallow the lump that sprang up in his throat.
"I'm glad that I could make it, Karen." She nodded and stood near her mother's head, Bruce taking the spot next to her. The doctor shuffled his feet nervously and then looked to Karen for guidance. "I take it that it's time?"
"Yes." That one word was so broken that he sighed and nudged Tabitha off his lap, standing and not letting go of Erin's hand. Reaching out, he claimed Tabitha's hand, and she in turn brought Penelope in close. "I'm sorry."
"You made this choice out of love. Nothing else but that matters."
Karen met his eye, and the look on her face almost broke his heart even more. "Thank you, Dave." He nodded and gave her a small smile. "All right, Doctor Breslin, you can turn the machines off now."
The man nodded and went about his business, turning things off until the only noise in the room was the heart monitor that measured Erin's heartbeat. "It might take several hours to several days for her to pass on. She won't feel anything, nor will she wake up. I'm so sorry for your loss."
The doctor left the room, and silence reigned among them. Still, Erin's heart beat steadily, showing no signs of slowing down. Dave quickly stamped out the small flicker of hope that flared to life at that sign, knowing that a heartbeat did not equal life.
And then the first quiet sob tore out of Karen's lips and he looked to her once more. She was leaning over her mother, her hand brushing through her hair. "Mama, I'm sorry. I love you." She kissed her mother's forehead before meeting his eye. "You're staying here, right? Because I cannot. I just cannot watch this happen."
"Yes, Karen, I'm staying." She nodded and then rushed over to his side, hugging him tightly.
"If, by some miracle, she wakes up before she passes, tell her I love her?"
"Of course, darling." He kissed Karen's cheek tenderly and then pushed her away. "Tabitha, go out with your sister and brother for a little while. You don't need to watch this."
"Yes, Papa Dave." She kissed his cheek before bending down and kissing Erin's cheek. "I love you, Momma."
The trio left the room, and then Penelope was there, holding him as he finally let go. The sobs that tore from his gut were broken, harsh, terrible, sounds and he blindly reached out for Erin's hand, wishing and hoping and praying that she would give some response, that there would be a tightening of fingers around his.
That never came, and he sobbed all the harder, never letting of his beloved's hand as he cried. "I'll stay with you, Dave, I promise. I won't leave the two of you alone. You need me here," Penelope whispered as she rubbed his back.
He shook his head. "No, Kitten, go home. You don't want to watch this, either. It will be slow and agonizing, and I do not want you to endure it. It's enough that you're here, in this moment," he replied as he regained control. Pulling his chair closer to Erin's side, he reached out and stroked her hair, memorizing the planes of her face, the way that even sleep could not remove the smile lines from around her mouth.
"All right, I suppose." Penelope let go of his other hand and made her way over to Erin, smiling sadly at her. "You look so lovely, still, Erin. Thank you for believing in me, for respecting me. I wish that I had known that before this. I wish that I had been kinder. There's a small part of my heart that loves you, Erin, and if I really was a fairy godmother, if I really had magical powers, I would grant Rossi's fondest wish and have you wake up. I would say that true love's kiss would contain the power of life and when he kissed you, you would begin the journey back to us. Come home, Erin." At the end of her monologue, she bent and kissed the woman's cheek softly, tears once more falling down her cheeks. "Please, if there's even some tiny little spark that can hear my voice, come home."
Penelope met his eye once more, and he tried to smile at her. "From your lips to God's ears, Kitten. Now go."
She nodded and left the room, closing the door behind her. Once she was gone, Dave scooted his chair closer to Erin's bedside, picking up her hand again, holding it tightly. "True love's kiss," he murmured, thinking about Penelope's words. Deciding that it was worth a shot, he bent over Erin's prone form and kissed her lips tenderly.
There was no response, and a tiny part of him was disappointed, even though he knew that miracles weren't the spectacular thing that everyone imagined them to be. His head came to rest on Erin's chest, and he listened to her heart as he synced his breaths with Erin's.
The door opened and he fought the instinct to look up. "Has there been any change, Papa?"
"No, Tabby girl."
"Ah. I couldn't stay away, I had to come back. Karen told me that she understood."
He nodded slightly, not moving his head from its resting spot on her chest. The bed shifted a little and he looked to see Tabitha crawling in, spooning her body close to her mother's as she rested her hand on Dave's back. "Have you decided what colleges to apply to yet?"
She gave him a small smile, seemingly grateful that he had given her something else to focus on. "Only one, and I'm praying that they'll accept me."
"Let me guess, Bryn Mawr?" She nodded and he couldn't help but smile. "You'll make it in, I have no doubt of that." She patted his back as she nodded, a deep yawn splitting her face. "It's the hospital. It makes everyone tired. I remember, even when Caroline was in labor, how exhausted I was. And then…"
His voice trailed off, remembering the look the doctor had given him when James had been delivered. A different sort of lethargy had enveloped him then, and he had trouble remembering anything other than the doctor's sad eyes. "Did, did James ever take a breath?"
"No, lambkin, he didn't. The umbilical cord had wrapped around his neck at some point, and there was nothing the doctors could do for him."
"Momma lost a baby once. There was supposed to be another baby after Bruce, but before me. We would have been five, if everything had gone right." He smiled at her words, a warm blanket of love wrapping around his heart at her casual acceptance of the fact that their family should have five children in it.
"It hurts, to lose a baby. Caroline and I drifted apart after that."
"Momma started drinking after that." The soft sigh told him that the scars of Erin's alcoholism hadn't quite faded away, and he reached across his lover's body to tangle his fingers with Tabitha's, squeezing gently. "Why would that man do that, Papa? Why would he destroy her like this?"
"Because some people cannot move beyond revenge. Some people are so hellbent on seeing their adversary brought down, they will use whatever weakness that person has and exploit it. Curtis was all about misdirection, but your mother caught on. She always was a smart cookie. Did his mark…?"
"Leave a scar? Yeah." Tabitha squeezed his hand once more, tighter this time, and he knew that she was crying once more. "Do, do you think she'd be the same, if she woke up?"
"Honestly?" He thought back to Brian Matloff, how a long coma had changed things about him, made him a different person. "No. She would be changed, just a little. But I know that we'd do our best to remind her what her life was like. We'd bring her home."
"We would." They fell silent once more, and Dave fought the drooping of his eyelids for as long as he could. It was a losing battle, though, and he fell asleep to the sound of her heart beating, the noise of it filling his heart to brimming.
When he woke up the next morning, he saw that Tabitha was still asleep, their hands still entwined. He could feel a heavy weight on his back, though, and he wondered what it was. Gently, he sat up, taking care not to jostle Tabitha's hand, to not wake her. It was that movement, though, that caused Erin's hand to flop back down on the bed. Shaking his head slightly, Dave waited for his Tabby-girl to wake up before he questioned her.
It took another thirty minutes before she stirred, and he pinned his gaze on her. "What, Papa Dave?"
"Did you place your mother's hand on my back last night before you went to sleep?"
She shook her head vigorously. "No. I was out before you were, I think. Maybe one of the nurses did that. They've been so kind to us, throughout this whole ordeal."
Dave shrugged, letting go of Tabitha's hand so that he could pick up Erin's. He suppressed his gasp at the slight tightening of her fingers around his and met his surrogate daughter's eye once more. "I think we need a new doctor, Tabby-girl. One who isn't quite to insistent on giving up hope."
"Why?" she asked, her brow furrowing in confusion.
"Because your mother's fingers are tightened around my hand here, and someone who is dying, who is in a persistent vegetative state, would not be able to respond so."
A tiny smile curled up her lips as her eyes began to sparkle with tears. "Well, do you have anyone in mind?"
He nodded before pulling out his phone, quickly dialing Penelope. "Kitten, I need you to get in contact with Tiffany Engleman."
"Well, hello to you, too, Dave. What can I do for you again?"
"I need you to call Doctor Tiffany Engleman and have her come to George Washington. Erin is holding my hand as we speak, and I am never going to doubt your powers ever again. She's clasping my hand, Kitten."
He heard the quick intake of breath on her side of the phone and knew that the woman was close to tears. "I promise, as soon as I'm off the phone with you, I'm calling her. And then I'll be by your side in a flash. If she wakes up before I get there, tell her that she is never to scare us like that again!"
Dave could hear the truth behind her words, and smiled a little wider at Tabitha. "I will, Kitten. Hurry."
"I know." She hung up without saying goodbye and he just smiled at Tabitha, watching her wipe her eyes from tears.
"My sweet Briar Rose," he murmured as he watched Erin's face for further signs of wakefulness. "Wake up, we're all waiting to see those beautiful eyes of yours open." The darting of her eyes behind her closed lids picked up just as the nurse bustled into the room.
"David?" Erin's voice sounded brittle, crackly, but oh so sweet to his ears, and he met the nurse's eye.
"I'm here, my bella Briar Rose. So is Tabitha. The others will be here soon, along with your new doctor." Dave narrowed his eyes at the nurse, and she nodded hurriedly in return, taking down Erin's vitals before scurrying from the room. "We love you, and are so glad that you decided to wake up and come back to us. I love you."
Leaning in, he kissed her softly, welcoming the feel of her lips kissing him back. He really would never doubt in miracles or magic ever again. Like Sleeping Beauty, the love of his life had awakened with his kiss, and somehow, he knew they would live happily ever after, despite the long road of recovery ahead of them.