It had been a perfect day. The sunny, hot afternoon had turned into a warm, clear night, and Julia had no where to be except at home. She was sitting on the couch wrapped in a soft blue dressing gown, vintage wine in one hand, trashy summer romance novel in the other. The pasta bake she had cooked earlier had tasted delicious and she couldn't remember the last time she had felt so peaceful. The doorbell rang.
She ignored it, thinking it was probably just some salesman doing a door-to-door round of the apartment building. But it rang again, five more times. Figuring it could only be one person, Julia closed the book and stood up, stretched the tiredness out of her bones and then answered the door.
Spike had his fist raised to pound on the door, but stopped when it swung open.
Julia smiled. "Hey, what're you—"
He brushed past her and went to the window, peeking suspiciously through a gap in the closed curtains.
"—doing here?" Julia finished. Then she noticed the gun he held in one hand. Not a friendly visit, then.
"I'm in trouble. I need somewhere to lie low for a few hours." Spike holstered his gun and flopped on to the sofa.
Julia shrugged, gesturing to the couch. "Well, make yourself at home."
"Don't mind if I do."
Pouring out another glass of wine, Julia sat down next to him and looked apprehensively up at the window.
"So who's after you?"
"Just a few White Tigers. It's nothing too serious, but I'd rather they didn't find me."
It always amazed Julia that the Syndicate seemed to adopt a different scale of seriousness compared to the rest of the world. Most people would think getting shot at was pretty damn serious, but not Spike.
The doorbell rang.
The two of them exchanged a worried glance and Spike readied his gun, sliding over to the front door. He motioned for Julia to hide somewhere and she quickly disappeared into the closet, holding her breath in order to stay as quiet as possible.
Spike opened the door, turning quickly to point the gun, finger almost squeezing the trigger…
"Oh."
Vicious raised an eyebrow. "You too?"
"The White Tigers?"
The silver-haired man nodded curtly, striding into the little apartment. He was carrying a large duffle bag over one shoulder. "The negotiator thought he could play by his own rules."
"Yeah well I got caught up in a nightclub brawl. Some people just can't keep their mouths shut, you know?"
Vicious peered into the bedroom. "Where's Julia?"
"Oh crap, I forgot…" Spike wrenched open the closet door and Julia recoiled in fright.
"Spike!"
"Don't worry, it was just Vicious."
Julia scowled. As if Vicious wasn't a murderer himself. She looked at her boyfriend suspiciously as he dropped the bag into the closet. "And what're you doing here?"
"My little plan went wrong. It's what happens when you trust idiots." He stuck his katana in the umbrella stand and went to the drinks cabinet to pour himself a glass of Merlot. Julia ran a hand through her hair, watching the two of them. So much for a night to herself.
The doorbell rang again, and this time Julia didn't bother to hide, she simply stood there with her arms folded. The two men moved forward, Spike's gun at the ready, Vicious reaching for his katana again.
"3, 2, 1…" Spike breathed. He flung the door open. There was the screech of metal, a bang and a yell.
"What the fuck?"
"Shin?"
The man sighed. "Lin, actually. Thanks a lot, Spike." There was blood seeping through a rip in Lin's sleeve. The bullet had only just scraped his shoulder. Calmly, he pulled a white handkerchief out of his pocket and held it to the wound. Julia gazed at the small hole that was now in the wall on the other side of the hall. The landlord would want that explaining at some point, and he'd want someone to pay for the repairs. Did Julia have the money? No. Did she have a good excuse? No. So who was going to get the blame and foot the bill? She was, obviously. Not that any of the assembled men gave a flying fuck.
"The White Tigers are after me for re-routing one of their Red Eye shipments to a colony on Venus," Lin explained. "They're all over the city. I need somewhere to lie low for a while, and this was the closest place I could think of." He shot a glance at Spike. "But it looks like I can't even catch a break here either."
Vicious was already pouring him a glass of wine as Julia found the medical kit. She sat on the couch next to Lin and began helping him treat the cut. Once she had finished, the four of them sat in chairs around the room, trading stories about what had happened. Vicious began, regaling them all with a dramatic story of a tense negotiation gone wrong.
"Last week I got a call from a dealer on Eros. He's a ruthless man, he doesn't like to haggle too much and he runs the moment he senses any danger of losing an investment. Anyway, I'd just got this bag of Red Eye in from Ganymede, so we agreed to meet at the dock. I figured I'd bring a negotiator to maximize our chances of getting the best deal, only it turned out the negotiator was a greedy son of a bitch who thought he could take on the Syndicates single-handedly. He sold the White Tigers the location of the rendezvous. We were ambushed, he got shot, I only just managed to get away with the goods." Now Julia knew what had been in the duffle bag Vicious was carrying.
"That's nothing," Lin sighed. "The Tigers were meant to have a shipment of Red Eye moved from New Tijuana to Mars, only I got tipped off about it. I hacked into the system and re-routed it to Venus, there're some of our people there that have buyers ready and waiting. The Tigers were meant to be collecting it a few hours ago, but when it didn't arrive they called around, discovered its whereabouts and they found my associate. They managed to torture my name out of him, so now they're after me."
Spike sighed and stumped a cigarette out in the ashtray on the coffee table. "I have to admit, my pickle is a little more informal than yours, but it's a lot juicier." He leaned back, one hand behind his head, swirling his third glass of wine lazily in one hand. "I went to King's. I figure it's a nice night, so why not? When I get there, this pretty girl asks to sit with me. She says there're some guys in the corner who she's afraid of. Me being a real gentleman and all, I let her sit there and we get talking. She says those boys are some kids her brother knows, they're part of the White Tigers. Well that's fair enough. Nothing to get riled up about, right? But then one of the guys comes over. He's like, "what're you doin' with my girl, buddy?" I remind him she's not his girlfriend, and then he starts yelling. I'm like, man it's a nightclub. All anyone wants to do is have fun, you know? So I stand up, grab the guy's collar and I punch him in the face. For some reason his friends don't like that, so I have to deal with them too. Then one of them shouts, "Hey, aren't you that Spike Spiegel from the Red Dragons?" And then about twenty more guys show up, armed with knives and bats and all kinds of crap. I managed to get out but I don't think they're gonna stop looking for a few hours." Julia sighed. Surely her apartment wasn't the only place in town people could hide out?
The doorbell rang.
Spike, Vicious and Lin all looked up, but before they could move Julia was already there, opening the door to a short, red-haired woman carrying a huge, steaming apple pie.
"Annie!"
The woman smiled happily as Julia leaned over to hug her. "What's all this? You kids having a party or something?"
"No, they're hiding from the White Tigers."
Annie raised an eyebrow. "And all of you came to the same place, eh?"
The three men shrugged in unison.
Annie nudged Julia in the side. "That's what boys do. They'll cling to any woman that'll keep 'em fed and watered." She set the pie on the coffee table and Vicious, Spike and Lin inched forward, eyeing it hungrily. Annie sighed. "See what I mean? They're like stray dogs, every one of 'em."
"I'll get plates," Julia mumbled.
The five of them ate copious amounts of pie, smoked copious amounts of cigarettes and drank copious amounts of wine. They chatted and laughed until Annie said she had to go, leaving the rest of them to find sleeping arrangements. Spike crashed on the couch, Lin took the spare room and Julia and Vicious retired to the master bedroom. Vicious flopped onto the pillow, instantly asleep, his arm loosely around Julia's waist. He smelled pleasantly of apples, wine and tobacco, but despite her tiredness it was a warm night and Julia found it difficult to get to sleep. She had rested most of the day, lounging around in her dressing gown, and now she was paying the price.
At half past two, the doorbell rang.
Julia's eyes flickered open in the darkness, tiredness engulfing her. Apparently once she'd fallen asleep she didn't want to get up. She looked at Vicious, but he didn't move. Carefully, she crept out of bed and walked into the sitting room. Spike was on the couch, sleeping like a baby. The bell rang again, and Julia began to doubt whether Spike would have heard it if he'd been sleeping with it next to his ear.
Grabbing Vicious' katana from the umbrella stand, she carefully slid it from its sheath and moved over to the door, hiding the weapon behind her back. Taking a breath, she opened it slowly.
Three huge, beefy men stood in the doorway, intimidating in their cut-off leather jackets and sinister sneers, tattooed muscles gleaming.
"Yes? Can I help you?" Julia yawned at them.
"We gotta search your apartment, sweetheart," said the one on the right. He was the tallest of the three and he was wearing shorts that showed off the tattoos on his legs - white tiger stripes. Real sexy, Julia thought disdainfully.
"Right now?" she groaned. "Come on, it's two-thirty."
"It's imperative, honey," said the one on the left. He had a bad crew cut and a fearsome handlebar moustache. "We think you might be fraternizin' with dangerous and unpredictable individuals." Good vocabulary, Julia thought. Shame about the 'tache.
"I think you might be dangerous individuals yourselves," she said, leaning against the doorframe and smiling innocently. They were clearly very pleased that a young woman in a short nightdress had opened the door.
It was the middle man's turn to speak. "Hey, we're the good guys, baby. We're here to protect your pretty head from trouble."
"Who says I need protecting?"
The three of them guffawed, looking at each other as if Julia was a little girl who'd just asked why pigs couldn't fly. She hardened her grip on the katana, finding the weight of it reassuring.
"You don't, baby," said Tattoos. "Course you don't. You're a strong, brave, sexy woman, we see that. But in your apartment is a couple of men we've been looking for for a few hours, and as you kindly pointed out it's getting' pretty late and we're all tired as shit, so if you could please step aside…"
"Sorry. It was nice talking to you but I've really got to go back to bed." She made to close the door but Moustache stuck his foot in it. He towered over her, pushing her back a few paces.
"I know those mother fuckers are in here with you. Move aside, before I snap your neck."
"How about I cut off that fucking moustache?" Julia swung the sword, the blade slicing easily through the man's out-stretched arms. He went down like a ton of bricks as the two behind him rushed forwards. Julia forced the blade through Tattoos' chest, pulled it out with a slurp and stuck it in Middle Man. None of them had even had time to shout.
Heart racing, Julia peered quickly down the corridor, left, right, making sure the coast was clear. Then, grabbing each man by the ankles, she hauled them into her apartment, leaving smears of blood trailing into the living room. She had to go back for Moustache's arms.
Spike stirred. He'd been having a dream that Julia was a beautiful, naked warrior of the Amazon and that she commanded an army who's main aim was to make every man in the world eat nothing but apple pies or face horrible execution. His head ached something fierce, and when he sat up he realised his dream was in fact a reality, except for the naked part unfortunately. But it was dark, so he could pretend.
"Oh you're awake," Julia observed. "Help me with this, would you?"
Spike blinked. "What…?"
Julia waved Moustache's arm at him. "Help. With this. The Tigers knocked on the door, said they wanted to look around my apartment. I picked up Vicious' katana just for self defense, but they got rowdy."
"So, wait, let me get this straight." Spike's head swam, but everything slowly came together. "You just killed three White Tiger enforcers." He blinked. "In your nightdress."
Julia nodded. "That's about the long and short of it."
"And you need help stuffing the corpses into body bags."
"Yup." Julia shoved the arms roughly into the black bag. She was covered in blood, as was the living room floor, but she knew Lin could find her a good, surreptitious cleaning company. Still, most girls only whined when someone interrupted their sleep, rather than murdering the culprits.
"I surprised them," she said as Spike came over to help. He smiled, stifling a yawn. "Yeah. You always manage to surprise me too."
"Sorry to wake you from your beauty sleep."
Spike pointed at his face, hair even more unkempt than usual, bags under his eyes and prickly stubble on his chin. "You call this beautiful?"
She shrugged, bending the dead man's head in order to fit it in the bag. "You're better looking than these idiots."
The bedroom door opened and Vicious came out. He stopped when he saw the mess.
"What…?"
"Good news," Spike said cheerily. "Julia murdered the White Tigers for us. The panic is officially over."
"What…?"
Julia handed Vicious his sword. "I'm sorry, it was the only weapon I had."
He inspected the bloodstains, then looked at the bloodied carpet again, but he didn't say a word.
Spike zipped up the last body bag and he and Julia hauled them over to the closet, setting them down beside the duffle bag full of Red Eye. Standing up straight, she yawned and stretched and her tired legs gave out, causing her to stumble into Vicious' arms. "I'm exhausted and in dire need of a shower. We'll clean up the rest in the morning."
As she disappeared into the bathroom, Spike and Vicious exchanged looks. "Did you see…?"
"Nope."
"How did she…?"
"No idea."
Vicious sighed. "I'm going back to bed. Maybe this is all a dream."
"Yeah, maybe. Maybe in reality Julia is a beautiful Amazonian warrior, running naked around the jungle, hellbent on enforcing the age of the Apple Pie diet."
Vicious nodded absently. "What...?"
Spike yawned and gave Vicious a pat on the back. "Doesn't matter." He lay back down on the sofa, crossing his legs on top of the arm rest.
Vicious watched him for a minute, then decided to let it go. The bedroom was just as he'd left it, and the sheets were still warm. In a few minutes he was sleeping soundly, and didn't hear Julia snuggle in beside him.
The morning promised another hot, sunny afternoon. Julia woke late to find Vicious still there, face down, arms spread eagle on either side. She stretched and blinked in the light, feeling completely relaxed. "That was such a strange dream."
"What dream?" Vicious murmured, smiling tiredly.
She squeezed him and leaned her head on his shoulder. "White Tigers… I dreamt I killed them all with your sword."
He laughed quietly, pulling her close, and whispered in her ear. "Are you sure it was a dream?"
Julia scrambled out of bed as fast as she could and wrenched open the door. The carpet covered in blood stains and there were two men in white hazard suits cleaning up with toothbrushes and chemicals.
"Oh."
"Yeah, I'll say Oh," Spike said as he helped Lin move the body bags out of the closet. "You know Julia, once upon a time I thought you were the shy, innocent girl-next-door who wouldn't hurt a fly."
"So what am I now?" She moved over to help them.
"Fucking scary," Spike said flatly. "Just remind me not to cross you at two-thirty am. You're like a… like an Amazonian princess or something."
Julia grinned. "You'd better believe it." The three bags were loaded onto a trolley, which Lin wheeled out to the van waiting outside. Julia opened the fridge in search of breakfast. "Hey Spike, there's some apple pie left over. You want some?"