Storyline: He remembers what it like in hell. She remember what it was like being possessed by a demon. After a year after that accident will he ever let go that she was possessed by a demon or will it go to far?

My first Duby fic.

This world is crazy, crazy
My dreams are fading, fading
No one can save me, save me

I want my life, I want my life
I want my life, I want my life

And when I wake you'll be here
And it will be the way it was
The way it was

I want my life
I want my life
I want my life

Song by Smile Empty Soul

Sitting at a bar alone, he didn't want to think about any thing or even remember what he saw in hell. How is it that he can remember every thing in hell when he wishes that he didn't. Every thing was changing for the older Winchester. He knew he should've stayed in hell not get pulled out by angel even if God does exist then why doesn't he come down and tell him that himself instead of sending angels down and saying that for him.

Now being back and free, every thing has changed. Sam using his demonic power and him lying about remembering hell and everything. Damn, how he wishes everything was back to how it was. Things were so much similar back then and now every thing is more difficult than ever.

Dean took another sip of his beer before his phone rang. He pulled it out of his pocket and saw that it was Sam. For some reason he had a feeling that his brother was going to get worried where he was and start calling him. Dean answered his cell. "Hey Sammy" he faked a cheery voice in him. Dean listen every single word his brother was telling him. "Yeah, got it. Bye" he hung up his cell and put it back in his pocket. That was a real quick and awarkward talking over the phone time.

"Take clear" the doctor said as he put the (I have no clue what they are called).

"She not breathing" another doctor said. Another beep sound went off before getting back the blonde pulse. The girl that was possessed by Ruby for almost a year was in the hospital and in a coma during the time Dean was in hell and got out of hell.

Slowly open her eyes. "How…where?" all questions just couldn't get all the write words out of her mouth.

"In St. John Hospital. A tall guy who claim to be your boyfriend bought you in but didn't leave his number or anything for us to contact him by any chance. He said you fall down a couple of stairs and that you wouldn't wake up." The doctor said. Obvious that was lie that Sam made just so no cops could question.

'Winchester' was the first thought that came in her mind. 'Dean and Sam Winchester' the boys name came back to her. She may not exactly remember what happen before or after she was possessed but those names came back to her. 'Ruby' the demon that possessed her over the last year now came in her mind. 'demon-war' all hints about what she been learning as Ruby was using her body.

"Can you please tell me your name?" she looked at the doctor. How the hell is going to be remembering her own name if she forgotten what it was? "I'll make an appointment to see if there were any damage in your brain and to see if it permanent or not" the doctor said. She stared but words came out. "I'll let the girl that here waiting to see if your alright can come in" he left the room.

She speechless and confused. Who wanted to see her? She barely remembers who she is and yet someone wanted to see her? Her? But who? The door open and female around five feet and four inches and her hair was dark brown and her skin was pale white that it seem like she had an eating disorder or maybe not? "Hey sis, how you feeling" the blonde just stared right at her still confused. 'Sister? I have a sister?' she thought for a moment. Awarkward.

"Before I came in the doctor told me that he was making an appointment for you later in the day to see if you have any brain damages or whatever" she still didn't speak. It not like she wanted to she did but didn't know what to say to her if she can't remember her own sister name. "I actually bought you a couple of things. Um… clothes, shoes, books" she looked nervous "well if I remember correctly you don't really like reading that much like I do but I bought them just cause we might be on a few hour flight back to New York and I thought you might like to do something for awhile instead of being a complete bitch to me and complain about almost every thing" she had a nervous smile on. She handed her one of the books she already had.

She looked down at the book for a couple of seconds before looking up. "Heart-shaped Box?" she questioned her.

She looked at her older sister and knows that she proberly would be freaked or scared or whatever because of the type of books she read. "I know it not the princess-fairytale kind you proberly read when you were younger and you did make fun of me cause I was always in the weird-horror books series and I'm always a freak to you but I thought you might like to read it" they both stared at each other. "But we'll get you magazines instead" she felt a little hurt because of how they were both different but she knew her big sister. She was the popular, homecoming queen type and she was the outcast, loner type who was weird.

"Your not a freak" she pushed her blonde hair out of her face while the two stared at each other in the eye. She gave a slight smile. "Thanks. That a first thing you ever said to me before" she said. "So I should get going and get my stuff ready I guess and see when you can get released I guess"

The former Ruby host stood up. Of course it was hurting her legs cause she just woken up and all. "No" she had a confused stare look in her eye. "We need to go now. Hand me those clothes you bought" her said before sticking out her hand. She gave her the clothes that she bought for her and sighed. She didn't like where this was going to be headed to.

As her sister was getting out of her hospital gown and changing into the black tank-top and a pair of jeans on she spoke. "I-So how come you wanna leave so soon? You just got up from a year around coma and yes I was the one who convinced mom and dad to let you stay on cause they were thinking of pulling the plug by the way so a 'thank you' would be nice"

"Thank you. Happy now?" the bitchness was coming back to her.

"So when we go back home where you wanna go to eat to celebrate you waking from your coma? Dad promises he'll pay no matter what the cost is" the blonde hesitated. How can go back to her normal life when nothing will ever be the same again? Not when the world is at being risk by trying to get taken over by demons now. She can't go back. Not until the job is finish that is. "We're not going back" she said zippering the second boot on her foot.

She was now headed to the door but turned and look at her sister whose now confused about almost every thing about the change in her sister. "You coming or what?" she didn't have time to play these type of games with any one.

"What you mean we're not going back? Remember your life of being pretty and popular and being a bitch to me?" she sounded hurt and confused all at the same time. No. She shook her blonde hair. "I don't remember any of that…not until" she looked at her figuring she proberly wouldn't understand what she happen to her. "Nevermind"

Looking at her sister, she really did wanted to know what was bothering her. "Not until what?" she question her back. It been a year since she saw any of her family members or friends but none of that was important to her any more. "Nothing…it just that. It just you wouldn't understand. I won't be even to explain this stuff to you and if I did….you be thinking of me in a mental intuition or something or thought I need help or whatever" she didn't speak. "What happen to me…what I saw it would be hard to explain and why I need to go somewhere and meet some people that would"

"And I'm just for the ride of company and get ignored by while you party off and have sex or whatever right?" if that was her life then it must be a good thing she changing it around then. And not just for her sake but for her little sister sake as well. "No, your coming with me because I think that it actually might interest you. Plus it would suck if I went by myself and had no one else to talk to on ride there" she saw slight smile in her sister face. She could tell she might enjoy this or not but that was going to be hard for her to know.

"Okay. But first we should go back to that motel that I was staying at? I really need to get my stuff before getting out of here" the two shared a sister laugh together.

"Sure. Let go" she said opening the door and letting her sister leave first before she did.