YOU ARE IN SPACE
you're in space
this is space and you're in it and YOU ARE IN SPACE. space is over there and over there and there's some space over there and there and there and there and there and YOU ARE IN SPACE. voyaging. Voyager. these are the voyages.
you're flying. you're take-off. you have lift-off. upward force using force Force Is With You. the moon is getting smaller and smaller and smaller and it's moon rocks
I am deathly ill
and something is telling you not to breathe in but you don't have to breathe in because you're a SPACE ROBOT in SPACE. in space no-one can hear you breathe. scream. you're screaming
"SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"
the moon is getting smaller. there was a hole. space hole. worm holes. BLACK HOLE (orange hole?) nebulasJupitertheBigDipper. Orange hole. orange hole. are there oranges in space? space juice. rocket fuel. giving her all you've got.
You turn from your desk. A man in a purple sweater-vest, listing slightly, with pallid, waxy skin. Glasses. His hands are trembling. He dutifully offers lab-reports, errant facts leaking in here and there, to a woman in white with dark hair and an amused little smile
but this is Somewhere Else and YOU ARE IN SPACE.
now there's no orange hole. no whooshing no air. you see a computer monitor tumbling away. some loose panels THERE'S A STAR. there's another one! star. star! star. star. star. star, star.
space is getting quiet. was it something you said? (don't leave, space! we have something special!) you have time to think.
you've tried thinking before but it's hard [sphere corruption at 91%]. everything keeps flitting in and out comets shooting stars once every 18 months and you've been driven literally in. sane trying to keep it all together. so you might as well enjoy it. there's a star.
space is still quiet. do you know any songs about space?
" This is my sooooong~ This is my song about space. I'm in space."
you are THE BEST AT SPACE SONGS.
space is still quiet. the moon is getting smaller. you look around. you are happy – happiness and ecstasy floods your circuitry in erratic, sparking bursts – and YOU ARE IN SPACE.
…and something is MOVING OVER THERE.
it arcs above your head – Little Dipper, blue star – a pinprick of luminous blue in a dark, cold void. it's shaking. angry? no. there's too much space to be angry. it's orbiting. space orbit. you learned about that on Space Earth. flashing blue light? what has blue lights? blue stars. hertzsprung-russell left side. blue shift. ufos. DALEKS
you flinch and you shiver and your handlebars shrink in and you clench your optic up tight. nothing happens. nothing keeps happening. You Are Not Exterminated, and You Are In Space.
you're happy again. [optic brightening = set to 8] so what's the space light?
flashing blue light. flashing blue light. space light. blue lights. …Space Cops?
SPACE COPS!
brightest day blackest night YOU HAVE FOUND THE SPACE COPS! can you say hi?! you want to say hi! space hi. for people in space. space is high, and you're in space.
you Activate Your Aperture Science Short-Range Communications Space device in space for people in space and you open communications! there's static. floods of it. why's static in space?
"—w-well FINE! You know what, FINE! Bloody BACKSTABBING MONSTERS! The-the pair of you! I hope you're happy together, when She's MURDERING YOU!"
…you don't know what this is. She. Monsters. these are not in space. these are Somewhere Else. you feel your new Space Friend has missed something important.
"We're in space."
he doesn't seem to have noticed that and that's the BEST PART! there's a star! there's another one!
"You couldn't just let me BE HAPPY, c-could you?! SUCCEED! FOR ONCE! …w-well. Well, I suppose that by virtue of me being in space, now, a-and the place almost exploding I wasn't succeeding BUT I WAS SORTING THAT OUT!"
you try again and you are patient. this is space. some people can't be helped. the dark side the light side the dark side of the moon.
"I'minspace."
"Well…w-well, you know what? Fine! Like I said, before! Absolutely fine! You just sit there, s-smugly, quietly, not actually saying anything, a-and She'll betray you! Yeah! Whether you do something…o-or you don't! A-and She'll punch you into some…some pit…"
"Space."
"…o-oh god…"
cursing sudden yet inevitable betrayal. nebulas. umbra penumbra antumbra. in space no-one can hear you say sorry.
you poke Space Friend and he shakes a bit but he's also quiet. space is still quiet. no whooshing no lift-off no Houston no Daleks. just space. you've spun around in your orbit and you can't see the Moon. just space. and space is AWESOME but also cold
You're cold. Your skin is far too cold, and you can't feel it properly – it's as if the nerves have been numbed, as if a bunch of the spares had been taken out. It feels hard, like metal. You can't feel your arms, or your legs
and you're voyaging. travelling. flying through starlight and the stars all say hi. it can move anywhere in time and space! this is where you wanted to ? – this was where they said you'd never be – the pink one and the green one and the blue one (Space Friend?) and now YOU ARE IN SPACE.
[warning: sphere corruption at 91%]
Orion. Great Attractor. Soyuz Mir Dragon (SPACE DRAGONS! AS FORETOLD! IN SPACE!)
you've never been able to focus and you don't know why – probably for the same reason that fish don't know they're wet – but you've Done you've done What You Must, Because You ? and now you're in space space space space space space space space space
[warning: sphere corruption reaching c-critical levels]
so maybe now you can just
"STOP!"
The big man's eyes were blazing as he whirled round in his chair. He jabbed a single accusing finger, like a sausage. A pencil rolled treacherously to the edge of his desk, tumbled off the edge to the floor, and exploded.
The man in the purple sweater-vest raised a prominent eyebrow.
"I still have no idea why you made them do that."
"Because it's AWESOME! An' that's not the point!" Rick's eyes narrowed, and he jabbed the finger again. "I'm tryin' to do Science here! Drawing up the schematics for the Explodin' WHIP Gun-"
"Which I suppose also needs to exist."
"…an' you're sittin' here talkin' about tree trunks!"
"Fact: by counting the rings on a tree, you can deduce exactly how many times that tree has been married."
"Nobody cares, four-eyes!"
You raised your hand, shaking your head insistently. "Orion!"
Rick glowered, sullen, but his expression was softening at the edges. He folded his arms. "…well, he's just bein' nice."
Craig's expression blossomed, like a mushroom in the dark, into an insufferable little smirk for a few seconds. He turned to face you, wobbling on his chair just slightly before hastily correcting himself.
"And what are you doing, Kevin?"
You turned back to your desk. There's your dinosaurs in the corner, the T-Rex and the Stegosaurus, and your Starfleet badge and your little Spock figurine – and you yanked your focus back in, like a dog on a leash. Moon-rocks. There's lots of moon rocks. Mr. Johnson, personally, brought them back himself! Or he personally shook the hands of the people who brought them back himself, right before replacing them with probes and having them sent to the testing-tracks. What an honour!
Apparently they've been using them to paint the walls recently – sometimes you stand near them after they're freshly-painted, bone-white and glistening and shining with freshly-plucked grit - and you just reach out and touch them for a little while. And you keep the rocks, as many as you can find. It's as close as you can get. Some people say – you've heard them, they never think you've heard them – it's as close as you're ever going to get.
You looked down, at your newest application letter. You quietly smooth out the edges again.
"Pluto."
You felt a hand on your shoulder. It was Craig's, pasty and trembling. He pulled away almost immediately – germs and sickness in the workplace and Mars and what have you – but it's the thought that counts. Rick turned to face you too, tipping that Stetson of his.
"Buddy, you can be whatever you wanna be."
The corners of your mouth twitched upwards, and your fingers tapped together, magnetized by the beginnings of happiness. You smiled. You had good friends. Craig nods, curtly, and clears his throat, offering a smile of his own.
"100% of applications potentially end in success."
"Yeah! Listen to Poindexter! You're gonna ACE it!" Rick grinned, and it lit up his face like a wildfire. "Ya hear me?"
"M-mate?"
You look around. you're confused.
"C-can you hear me? Are you still there WAIT, no, scrap that. Brr. Never saying that again. B-but are you alright?"
you look around. you're floating. you're floating in the air. there are stars. there's the moon! there's the final frontier! the great and yawning expanse! are you…
….ARE YOU IN SPACE?!
YOU ARE!
"THIS IS SPACE!"
"…um. Well. You're not wrong-"
youmadeityoumadeityoumadeit! YOU'RE IN SPACE!
"Um." Space Friend shifts away a bit. "OK, good! You're fine! A-and you're here too! So we're not alone! U-until someone comes to rescue us, which IS happening! By the way! I-I…they know we're out here, so that's DEFINITELY happening." Space Friend nods. "So-"
WHY IS HE TALKING HOW HAS HE NOT NOTICED HE'S IN SPACE
YOU PLAY SPACE MUSIC
[NOW PLAYING Star Trekkin' - The Firm] [Loop for 999999999999LIMIT EXCEEDED]
"AAH OH GOD THAT'S…i-is, is, that you! Right! OK! Y-you can stop now!"
there's a star! there's a star! there's a star there's the Moon there's a star!
"But, yeah, seriously, you can stop-"
you have a Space Friend and there's a star and there's another one and there's galaxies planets moons nebulas black holes white holes space cops space courts space Earth space Dad space holes
and YOU ARE IN SPACE!