Chi&Aiko: HELLOOO!
Chi: Great to see y'all again, It's another collab between our creators- SmurfyFriend and YinYangOfThePeaceCircle- AKA dragonmastrcrashrokz and Riverthunder :D
Aiko: I don't even know why we're here. We're not even IN this fic!
Chi: *smacks her* shaddap! We're just MCs!
Aiko: Alright, fine, fine, on with the fic already. You've hyped it up enough on Deviantart!
Chi: Yeah, I guess I have talked about this idea for… oh gosh, almost a year now *Facepalm*
Aiko: We SHOULD warn you guys that this will NOT be a happy fic.
Chi: GRAPHIC STUFF MAN. It's rated M for a reason! Reader Discretion is advised!
Aiko: Alright, alright, quit your hyping and START it already!
Chi: Alright, fine, fine! On we go!
It was a day like any other in the small mushroom village... But like any day, no one truly understood that what would happen that day would change the life of all the little blue inhabitants of the mushroom village.
Light crept sneakily into the mushroom house that was residence to the village prankster. And as soon as that light hit the covered eyeballs of the inhabitant, a large smile spread across his face.
Five, four, three, two-
There was a large, resounding KABOOM that rocked the quiet village, and an equally loud "HYAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" that followed it.
The laugh stopped as there was a loud knock on the prankster's door. The prankster snickered quietly, and answered the door, seeing Grouchy, Vanity, Greedy, Tailor, and Painter there on his front porch, faces covered in soot, irritated expressions across their faces. "Hello, everysmurf!" the prankster smirked, trying to hold back his giggle, "smurfy morning, isn't it?"
"I HATE 'smurfy morning'!" Grouchy snarled, glaring at Jokey.
"JOKEY SMURF! How DARE you smurf a horrid prank like that!" Vanity cried. "You just ruined my makeup! I'll have to redo it!"
Jokey tried to hold back a snigger at the narcissist's predicament. "Oui! And you ruined mah mastairpizza!" Painter added, glaring at the prankster with a vibrant fire in his eyes.
"And you ruined all th' trousers I smoifed!" Tailor's loud voice rose above all of their voices, "it'll take a WEEK to get those all clean!"
Jokey found it even harder to contain his laughs as Greedy took a huge bite from his muffin, crumbs falling down the front of him. "You know Jokey," Greedy said through cheekfuls of muffin, "one of these days you're going to get a smurf of your own medicine!"
Jokey nearly lost it right there. "Are you saying I'll get my-" Jokey had to pause to contain himself. "Just desserts? HYAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"Pretty soon you're going to get what's coming to you," Vanity sniffed disdainfully.
"I hate what's coming to you! But he's right," Grouchy agreed.
Jokey's cackle died in his throat. "Aw, come on, guys," he smiled, giving Vanity and Painter both a nudge, "it's just a joke!"
"You know, Jokey, one of these days, your pranks are going to get somebody KILLED!" Vanity snapped disdainfully.
"I hate 'get somebody killed', but he's right," Grouchy agreed. "You need to tone it down with all these pranks!"
"Aw, come on," Jokey rolled his eyes, "the only one that's going to die from one of my pranks is me from laughing myself to death."
Just then, the breakfast bell rang, and Greedy snapped to attention. "Smurfit! I forgot all about Clumsy helping me in the kitchen!" he remembered, and dashed back in the direction of his kitchen, fat rolls bouncing with each step.
Vanity jumped as well. "I have to help Farmer, I forgot! See you, Smurfs!" He called, jogging in the direction of the fields.
"I have to go too," Grouchy admitted. "We'll talk about this later, Jokey. Come on, Painter," the irritable Smurf muttered, turning to leave.
Painter muttered French curses in Jokey's direction, and sulked off behind Grouchy.
They didn't understand. None of them did. None of the others understood the jokes the prankster pulled.
No one understood the delicate balance that was shattered that day.
Jokey walked through the village, wrapped present in hand, ready for another joke. One groggy smurf in particular caught his eye. "Heya, Brainy!"
"What do you want, Jokey?" Groaned the smart Smurf in annoyance.
Jokey snickered under his breath and shoved the package towards Brainy. "Here! I have a smurfy surprise for you!"
"Jokey, I'm not in the mood for another one of those boxes to explode in my face," Brainy snapped. "Give it to someone else."
However, Jokey was not deterred. "Aw, come on, Brainy," Jokey insisted, "This one's different! Way more suited for a great, smart smurf such as yourself."
"Oh, fine," Brainy huffed. "Give it here."
The prankster smurf grinned like a fool as he passed the package to the reluctant bespectacled smurf, waiting for the inevitable result.
Brainy tore off the ribbon, and the package, of course, exploded in his face. "Why am I not surprised?" He sighed, tossing the now empty box aside. "You should come up with some new pranks, Jokey," he advised, strutting off. "That box one is getting tired and old."
Jokey's grin died slightly. What'd he mean 'tired and old'? That joke was a CLASSIC! It ALWAYS made him laugh. Brainy just doesn't have a sense of humor, Jokey decided, glaring slightly in the bespectacled smurf's direction, I'm a hundred times funnier than he'll EVER be!
A quiet laughing got Jokey's attention. The Smurflings! His smile started to return. They ALWAYS got a smurf out of Jokey's jokes. Especially Nat, he loved to laugh. Jokey looked in their direction, seeing the four walking nonchalantly, discussing whatever their plans for the day were. Jokey crept behind them carefully, not making a noise, until he was right behind Snappy. "BOO!" he grabbed Snappy's shoulders slightly, making the yellow-clad smurfling jump nearly half an apple in the air.
"DON'T DO THAT, JOKEY!" Snappy yelled, panting as he saw who had grabbed him. "IT'S NOT FUNNY!" he added as the other Smurflings started laughing at him.
Jokey laughed his raspy cackle, "HYAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" he laughed, "You're right, that wasn't funny- it was HILARIOUS!"
The pink-clad smurfling girl standing catty-corner to Snappy flicked her auburn braids. "Creepin' crawfish, Jokey! Tell us a joke!"
"Okay!" Jokey smiled and cleared his throat. "I got this one from Papa! Where does a 500 pound wartmonger sleep?"
"Anywhere he wants." Slouchy shrugged his shoulders a little.
"We've heard that one already, tell us a new one!" Sassette said, light in her eyes.
"Something good," Nat agreed, patting Snappy on the back. "You've told us a lot..." A slight, mischievous gleam appeared in his eye. "You haven't run out, have you?"
"No WAY!" Jokey huffed slightly, "I NEVER run out of jokes."
Jokey thought for a moment, "Okay! I heard this one from a friend from when I was a smurfling!"
He cleared his throat. "What do you call a dog with no legs?" without waiting to hear a response, he answered for them, "Doesn't matter, he can't come when he's called anyways!" he laughed, that was always a favorite joke of his. It was funny to him that he remembered it now, too.
Nat just sort of blinked. "Poor dog," he muttered. "It's too bad he can't run. Wouldn't you just be nice and take care of him?"
"I didn't really like that one, either," Snappy agreed. "It was a bit... Dark, Jokey."
"Some jokes ARE kinda dark, smurfling." Jokey shrugged. "Tell you what, though, my old friend told the BEST jokes... I learned pretty much all of the really smurfy jokes I know from him."
He wasn't bluffing. His childhood best friend taught him all his best jokes.
Tobias... It was kind of odd to think about him now, seeing as he'd been gone all those years... Jokey recalled it had been quite a few years since he'd even thought of the imp that he was such good friends with in his childhood years.
"Who was your friend?" Asked Snappy.
"Yeah, why haven't we met him?" Nat inquired curiously.
"Well, cause YOU," he ruffled Sassette's auburn hair, "weren't around, and you three," he gave them each a slight nudge, "didn't go into the forest much when you were smurflings the first time."
Jokey looked up at the clouds, "My best friend when I was a smurfling was an Imp I met in the forest called Tobias. But one day, right after I got into a fight with somesmurf I think, he just- went away without smurfing goodbye."
"Tha's weird," Slouchy said, sleepy calmness heavy in his voice, "D'ya know why?"
"Nope," Jokey shrugged, "Papa said something about his colony moving, but I don't really remember."
Right about then, they came to the mess hall. "Come on! I'll race you guys to the breakfast line!"
"You're ON!" Snappy agreed, taking off at full speed.
"I'll beat you, Snappy!" Nat hollered from behind him.
"Not on your LIFE!"
Sassette shouted after them, "I'll beat ALL'a ya!"
Slouchy just groaned and walked after them. "Why are we ALWAYS running?"
After breakfast, the smurfs all dispersed to do their chores. Snappy and Slouchy worked in the fields as punishment for being caught stealing snacks from Greedy's kitchen, but Nat and Sassette remained in the village, sweeping, or collecting scattered firewood. Jokey also gathered firewood, and carried it in tall stacks to the woodpiles to be cut. But what he didn't suspect that he was about to get a taste of his own medicine in the near future.
Vanity glanced over at the others. "You guys ready?" He asked in a hushed tone.
Greedy stuffed the remainder of his cupcake in his mouth, and nodded, Painter, Tailor and Grouchy all smirking and giving a thumbs up. "Oui! Ah zink it is time for ze Jokey Smerf to smerf 'is, as you say, 'just desserts', ohohohon!" Painter half whispered, putting the final touches on their prank.
"I don't hate 'just desserts'," Grouchy smirked. "Vanity, do you wanna smurf the honor?"
"I would be happy to," Vanity agreed excitedly, rubbing his hands together in anticipation.
"Oy, I don' know about this, guys," Tailor chimed in, looking a bit paranoid, "You know what they say, 'before embarking on a quest fer revenge, dig two graves!'"
"Oh, come on, Tai!" Vanity insisted. "It's just the same prank he gives everyone else. Besides, no one EVER pranks Jokey back! One or two isn't going to hurt him! Besides, maybe he'll tone it down after he knows what it's like to be pranked," Vanity reasoned. "I'm not saying he has to stop entirely, but fewer explosions in the morning would be nice."
"I don't know..." Tailor said, still looking unsure. "I'm smoifin' a bad feeling about owall this..."
Greedy patted Tailor on the back. "It's just a little prank. What's the worst that could happen? Smurf right on ahead, Vanity!"
Vanity picked up the present, winked at Tailor, and strolled up to Jokey. "Hey, Jokey," he said in a sweet voice. "The others and I all agree we might have overreacted just the teensiest bit, so we got you a present!" Vanity held the green and purple box out. "Go on, smurf what it is!" He encouraged.
Jokey had been carrying a pile of logs when Vanity approached him, and his arms were quite full. "Thanks, Vanity! Give me one second..."
Nat and Sassette continued watching from where they collected kindling. But what none of them, not even Vanity or the other smurfs out for revenge knew was that there was something REALLY not right with the package. Before Jokey even had the chance to put his wood down, the box exploded, sending Jokey backwards and all the wood in his arms down on top of him. "Hoppin' Hornytoads! Jokey!" Sassette exclaimed, pointing in his direction.
Vanity went pale. "That wasn't supposed to happen," he hissed to Painter as Grouchy and Greedy began digging Jokey out of the logs.
"Well, whether or not it was supposed to, it DID." Greedy said plainly, moving a larger log from Jokey's chest, "Are you okay, buddy?"
Jokey didn't say anything for a good few minutes. Then at last, he stood up, and stared at the four smurfs, his eyes-usually a calm sapphire- looking like stormy ocean. "That WASN'T funny." his voice was deadly low, low enough to send chills down their spines.
"Sorry, Jokey," Vanity apologized. "Really, we didn't mean for it to happen. We wanted it to be like the pranks you give every other Smurf."
Jokey's glare darkened, and his voice turned into almost a growl. "That WASN'T funny." he repeated, slightly louder, "You're going to regret doing that, Vanity. Grouchy. Greedy. Painter. ALL of you."
Greedy felt a chill run down his spine. A chill from utter fear. Jokey was serious. Not a single doubt was in his face. Greedy tried to reach over to put his hand on the angry smurf's shoulder. "H-hey, let's not be too rash, Jokey, ol' buddy, ol-"
"DON'T touch me." Jokey shook his hand from his shoulder. "I am NOT your 'buddy.'"
Without another word, Jokey started storming off, muttering under his breath, the malice in his eyes not dissipating a bit. Tailor crept to where the stunned smurfs stood, and put a hand to his head. "I TOLD you guys…."
"I'm worried," Vanity admitted. "Maybe that wasn't such a good idea..."
"Well, Smerf on, zis is just JOKEY we're smurfzing about," Painter reasoned, "what, you zink he'll do, something dangerous? Ah zink non."
Vanity nodded. "You're right," he said at last. "Of course you are."
"Oui. Of course Ah am right." Painter shrugged, "Come on, we have to finish ze chores."
Greedy stared off in the direction Jokey left in for a moment just before he followed the others back to the village.
Lunch soon rolled around, and Jokey appeared to be back to his normal self. He'd gotten his plate, then sat down with the four smurflings. "Gosh, I keep forgettin' how much I don' like working out in th' fields," Slouchy yawned, almost slumped forward. "Too much work!"
"You're just lazy," Snappy teased, poking his shoulder.
"Yeah, Slouchy," Nat agreed. "You just don't like moving in general!"
Jokey snickered in agreement as Slouchy pouted and gave what seemed to be a tired glare at Snappy. But before he could say anything, there was a yelp of surprise from across the mess hall. "AIEE! SACRE BLEUSMURF!" the French voice of Painter almost screamed, looking red in the face, tongue hanging out, "Mai tongue! It is on FIAR! JOKEY!"
Jokey watched Painter with a dark smirk creeping over his expression, and calmly continued to eat the roast beef sandwich in front of him.
Nat looked up. "Jokey? What did you do?"
"Yeah, what sort of prank did you pull on Painter? He looks like he's in pain!" Snappy said, shocked.
"It's not that bad," Jokey said coolly, still smirking and spreading a bit of mayonnaise on his sandwich, "I just put a bit of Cayenne pepper in his drink, he's just being a baby about it."
Grouchy gave a sharp yelp. "JOKEY!" He yelled, glaring at the jokester, "You KNOW I hate mayonnaise! I can't eat this sandwich!" he spat, tossing the roast beef sandwich away from him in disgust, trying to wipe the offending condiment off his tongue.
Jokey rolled his eyes slightly in contempt, still smirking. "What a baby." he mumbled under his breath.
"Ow!" there was another yelp from about a table away, "Who did this!?"
The smurflings looked over to the source of the noise, Tailor. He looked horrified, staring down at a long, sharp sewing needle in his hand. "Jokey, did you put this needle in my sandwich?!"
"I don't think so," Jokey's smirk grew ever so slightly, and he took a bite out of his sandwich.
Just as Jokey said this, Vanity shrieked. "AUGH!" he yelped, jumping into Farmer's lap, "BUGS!"
The smurflings all looked over to where Vanity cowered in his mate's lap. There were ants and what appeared to be cockroaches skittering all over the plate, all of them seeming to come from the single bite in the burrito sitting on the plate. Jokey's smirk stretched almost ear to ear as he took another big bite from the sandwich.
All these pranks were scary to a point, but nothing could prepare them for what had happened next.
Without much warning, there was a commotion at the front of the chow line. Greedy desperately tried to speak, hands around his throat, eyes wild and wide. At first, nobody thought anything of it. Until his face started to turn purplish. "Oh dear, I think he's choking on something!" the feminine voice of Smurfette called out.
Hearing this, a smurf with a red hat, red slacks, and white beard darted through the crowd until he had reached Greedy. He wrapped his arms around Greedy from behind, made his hands a fist, and jabbed it into his stomach again and again, until Greedy finally coughed up what appeared to be a large chicken bone, and was again drawing deep breaths.
Snappy was almost white. "Jokey... These pranks aren't funny!" he yelped.
"You could have KILLED Greedy," Nat agreed, horrified. "That was smurfing too far!"
"Y-yeah!" Slouchy agreed, fear in his sleepy eyes.
"Someone could'a gotten really hurt!" Sassette looked stunned, almost white in the face.
Jokey, however, had hardly heard the smurflings' concerns. Right when Greedy had gotten the bone dislodged from his throat, and seen the expression across his terrified face, Jokey just about lost it. He laughed so hard, he nearly fell off his chair. Not his normal, scratchy laugh, either. No, for once, his laugh didn't sound happy. It didn't sound like Jokey at all. It was warped, twisted even. Completely unrecognizable.
"HYAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHA!"
"JOKEY SMURF!"" A loud, commanding voice stopped Jokey's laughing right then and there.
Jokey's laugh slowly died in his throat. The smurf in red clothing approached him, a dead serious look across his face. "Jokey, Greedy could have been KILLED!" he scolded Jokey, "If I've smurfed you once, I've smurfed you a THOUSAND times, your pranks can NEVER cause somesmurf harm!"
"I-I- But Papa smurf, I-" Jokey tried to reason with him, but was soon cut off.
"NO BUTS, Jokey!" Papa smurf continued to scold him, "You are to apologize to Greedy IMMEDIATELY, and gather his firewood for the next week!"
Jokey ducked his head in an ashamed manner. After a moment or two, he shuffled to where Greedy still stood, trying to regain his sanity. "I-I'm sorry, Greedy..." Jokey said softly, "I-I-I didn't mean to-"
"S-STAY AWAY FROM ME!" Greedy panicked at the sight of Jokey, backing away, his hand wandering to a chef's knife sitting next to a cutting board. "Y-You tried to kill me!"
Grouchy leaped between the two of them. "Jokey, back off," he ordered. "Greedy, leave the knife alone. Don't do anything that could hurt somesmurf, okay? He's not coming near you anymore."
"T-Tried to kill me..." Greedy continued to mutter, face almost white, legs weak and wobbly as he started to slide into a sitting position against the table. "Oh, God, he tried to k-kill me..."
Papa approached Jokey from the side, and put a hand on his shoulder. "Jokey." he said softly, "Now would be a smurfy time for you to go start collecting that firewood."
Just as Jokey started to walk away, Papa smurf caught him by the wrist. "One moment..." he said softly. "Did you eat breakfast this morning, Jokey?"
The prankster looked thoroughly confused. "Uh, no, why Papa?"
Papa smurf seemed to tense up at his answer. "No reason." Papa smurf replied, releasing Jokey, "Go collect the firewood. But be careful, Gargamel's been spotted in the forest today."
Jokey just gave the leader a confused look, then stalked off into the woods.
Nat, Snappy, and the other Smurflings cautiously approached Greedy.
"A-are you okay, Greedy?" Snappy asked.
"Y-yeah, that was scary," Nat agreed.
"I'll say..." Sassette nodded, looking down at the village chef with worried eyes.
Greedy just sat there for a moment or two, trying to process what had just happened. "Y-Yeah..." he said at last, grabbing a stray cupcake from the shelf just above him, and taking a big bite from it. "I'm fine, smurflings... I-I'm just fine..."
"I'm glad," Nat sighed in relief.
"Yeah, I've never seen Jokey like that," Snappy muttered. "He was SCARY..."
Meanwhile, Jokey was gathering firewood, muttering under his breath. "They're just overreacting... It was just a little prank..."
Little did the prankster know, there was someone right behind him, watching him, waiting for just the right moment to strike, so he could test his latest and greatest potion. "That was actually a great prank," Jokey mused to himself. "Come to think of it, all of them were... I should pull pranks like that more often."
"You won't get to pull ANY more pranks once I'm through with you!" the evil wizard watching the prankster smurf declared with a cackle, snatching him up in his hands.
"YIPE!" Jokey yelped, shocked. "PAPA SMURF! SOMEBODY! HELP! GARGAMEL!"
"Quiet you little blue bumpkin!" The wizard growled, bending down to where the rusty Abyssinian cat he kept as a companion pawed eagerly at the smurf in his hand, "Or else I'll let Azrael here shut you up PERMANENTLY."
"REE-ow rroaw!" the cat flicked his ruddy red tail, ears twitching eagerly.
Gargamel reached into the bush he had just come from, taking a large burlap sack from it. He quickly reached into the sack, taking a potion bottle with what appeared to be a squeeze pump attached. The wizard sat on a nearby log, then angled the potion right at Jokey. He held the smurf by the small amount of skin on the back of his neck, and pumped the little pump of the potion. "This will make you even MORE delicious, you rotten little thing! Mwahaha, I can hardly WAIT!"
Jokey yelped, and began fighting to get out of Gargamel's tight grip. "Let-! Me-! GO-!" Jokey screamed fearfully.
"Not on your SMURF you little blue beast!" Gargamel cackled.
The wizard's cackling was cut off by a yelp of surprise. "Ouch!" he cried out, releasing the smurf, rubbing his hand, "Something bit me!"
He wasn't sure what had happened. But something inside of Jokey spoke to him in a familiar voice. "Run, Jokey. Run like you've never run before!" Jokey didn't need to be told twice. He made a beeline, racing as far away from the old, evil wizard and his cat as he could.
As Jokey ran, a terrible, indescribable scream hit the air, soon accompanied by what appeared to be the screams of a fighting animal. Jokey dismissed it as sounds produced by his own panic, and kept running until he simply could not anymore. "That was close-!" he panted.
"I'll say! That guy just about had us, huh?" A voice from behind the prankster spoke.
Jokey turned at the sound of the voice. "Wh-who said that?"
"What, you don't recognize your best friend?" the voice jabbed playfully.
Just then, a being materialized before Jokey, a short, but slim creature with light green skin and dark green attire. His pointed ears twitched slightly and his slightly yellow teeth showed slightly in a smile. "Tobias!" Jokey laughed in relief. "Where have you been all this time, buddy?"
"My colony had to move! Some human moved in on our territory!" the imp, identified as Tobias spoke, approaching Jokey, "I've been spending the last few years trying to find you! I can't believe it's been so long!"
"No kidding!" Jokey agreed. "Thanks for helping me out with that mangy cat and its owner! I'm glad you're still such a smurfy friend even after all this time!"
"No problem, Jokey." Tobias smirked, putting an arm over Jokey's shoulder in a friendly manner. "What're you doing out here, anyways? It's dangerous to be out in the forest alone."
"Oh, Papa got mad at me for pulling a prank on that fat Smurf, Greedy." Jokey shrugged.
"That's stupid!" Tobias snorted indignantly. "It's just a dumb prank, and he sends you out to collect firewood with some stupid human prowling around?!"
"No kidding," Jokey agreed. "Something about how he could have died, choking on the chicken bone, or something."
"And for THAT he sends you out here?" Tobias stared at him disbelievingly. "Come on, everybody needs a near-death experience to make them appreciate what they have in life. I bet you that fatty is ten times happier than when he woke up, cause he can appreciate that he DIDN'T die. You did more help than harm!"
"I know, right?" Jokey agreed. "The way they act you'd think I'd put a knife to his throat and slit it then and there!"
"That Papa of yours sure is overdramatic," Tobias shook his head, then smiled widely as he came up with the best idea he'd ever had. "Hey! Jokey, I got it!"
"What's that?" Jokey asked, cocking his head to the side slightly in confusion.
"What if we proved to them that you were in the right?" Tobias stated, "I mean, if they get what's coming to them, and the other smurfs that were giving you trouble see that maybe a near death experience is what they need to put life in perspective, they'll feel bad for making you go out. Whaddya say, pal?"
"Sound like a plan," Jokey agreed. "Maybe just something little?" He added as an afterthought; the idea was good, but he didn't want I actually get anyone hurt.
Tobias sighed slightly and rolled his eyes. "You're so naive, Jokey," he said plainly, "But, your family, your rules."
"I mean, a few bumps and cuts won't hurt anyone," Jokey say quickly. "But, I don't want to get someone SERIOUSLY hurt. I'd feel pretty guilty if I hurt somebody TOO bad."
"I can't guarantee that, Joker," Tobias shook his head, his face serious, "It doesn't matter though, so long as nobody knows it's us... we have to keep this all a secret or else we'll be in some big trouble."
Tobias looked down at Jokey and his body, still greasy from the potion. "Ugh, come on, we'll take a dip in the river before we go to the village. You smell like iron."
Jokey looked himself over in confusion. "I do?" He asked, as Tobias gave an affirmative nod. "Weird... I wonder why."
"It's probably that nasty potion," Tobias made a grimace, "It'll wash off in the river though, I bet."
"Yeah, good idea," Jokey agreed, heading in the direction of the River Smurf.
Meanwhile in the village, there was a bit of a commotion. Somesmurf had heard strange noises coming from the forest, and urged Papa to go with them to see what it was. Nat and Sassette were finishing up their chores in the village when Snappy and Slouchy approached them, looking pale in the face. "Pale pillbugs, guys!" Sassette exclaimed once they got close enough. "Wha's all the racket about!?"
"You guys- are not gonna- believe- what we just- saw!" Slouchy said in between breaths, then motioned for them to follow, "C'mon!"
"O...kay...?" Nat asked, jogging after the other two Smurfling boys at a steady pace. "Geez, why do you look so flustered?"
"You'll see!" Slouchy replied, rushing off towards the forest, Snappy in lead.
Moments later, they came to where there appeared to be a small gathering of smurfs just past the brush. There was, what appeared to be, a black lump laying sprawled out on the ground, and what roughly seemed to be a pinkish body of some form, looking carelessly laid on the ground. At first, neither of the two could tell what was so interesting that Snappy and Slouchy had to bring them here. But all at once, Sassette's eyes widened as she realized what the lumps were. "P-Pappy Gargamel!" the young smurfette squeaked, running from the bush, tripping over rocks and roots until she finally reached the black mass, and threw her arms around it as best as she could, tears rolling down her cheeks.
Slouchy moved slightly so the other body couldn't be easily seen by Nat. "Papa says Azrael got skinned. Not real well, either." he said, almost hushed, still looking positively spooked.
Nat was stunned. "Y-you mean... someone KILLED Gargamel and Azrael?!"
"Yeah," Snappy said in a hushed voice.
"I... I wonder who cou'da done it?" Slouchy asked, not even stopping himself from staring at the two corpses. "Maybe some thief or something...?"
"I guess it makes sense," Nat said slowly.
"Yeah," Snappy agreed quietly. "I mean, I've heard somesmurfs say that humans sometimes kill each other over nothing... I guess I just don't understand why they skinned Azrael or anything. Killing the cat doesn't make sense..."
"I dunno either." Slouchy replied, "Guess it's jus'... a random act of cruelty, or somethin..."
"I feel bad for him, honestly..." Nat admitted. "I really do..."
"I guess," Snappy said, in a voice that said he disagreed.
"I do too..." Slouchy couldn't help but stare at the pink skin on what used to be Abyssinian cat. "I know they chased us around a lot... bu' NO'un deserves somethin' like tha'... Even Gargamel n' Azrael..."
"No WAY," Nat agreed. "Azrael especially never deserved that!"
"At least we don' have t' worry about gettin' caught by them no more..." Slouchy mumbled, watching Sassette keep holding the unmoving fingers of the figure she thought her father, crying and sobbing hysterically.
Nat scooted around to Sassette's side, rubbing her back. "It's okay, Sassy," he tried to soothe her, making sure not to look in the direction of the slain Abyssinian cat. "He's... I bet he's in a better place now... 'Cause nosmurf could make someone as smurfy as you and go someplace bad..."
Sassette looked up slightly, then over at Nat. Without much thought behind it, she hugged him tightly, still crying. "I-It's not fair, Nat... It's jus' not fair..."
Slouchy moved a little to comfort her, putting a hand on her back. "It's ok, Sassette...At least he didn' suffer too much..."
he glanced back at the wizard that had given them so much trouble over the years. He had a long, thin slash over his throat that had once poured blood, he couldn'tve suffered long. The wizard's mutilated face told a different story, but Slouchy dared not say that.
"Well, I can kinda see why you love him," Nat said slowly.
"Yeah," Snappy agreed. "Definitely, Sassy."
Sassette was quiet for a moment or two, but then she pulled away slightly. "Th-thanks, guys..." she murmured, "I like tha' yer not tryin' t' tell me I shouldn' be sad, like Brainy 'er th' others would... Tha's special..."
Sassette glanced back at Gargamel for a moment, then wiped her eyes sadly. "I know he's no' ACTUALLY my Pappy..." she said softly, "Bu' it was his spell that made me... Tha's gotta count for something..."
Slouchy nodded and took her hand. "It does, Sassette. Even though he was mean, if we didn' have him, we wouldn'a had you or Smurfette." He gave her hand a slight squeeze, "C'mon... Maybe Greedy's go' some ice cream or cookies 'er somethin' smurfed."
He started to lead her back the way they came, until conversation caught his ear, and he stopped. Sassette looked back at him. "Hm? What's the matter, Slouchy?" She asked, before he put a finger to his lips.
"It's probably nothin'," he replied, "Snappy, you take Sassette back to th' village. Nat, come with me, I think I hear somethin'..."
"Got it," Snappy nodded. "Don't do anything stupid," he added, a little worried. "Keep to the shadows and don't get noticed."
"Obviously we aren't going to go running out screaming 'who's there' at the top o our lungs," Nat retorted, following Slouchy.
Slouchy and Nat crept a little further, watching as Sassette and Snappy walked back to the village. "Shh! That's what I heard!" Slouchy said in a hushed whisper.
"I still don't know why we're even bothering examining them, Papa smurf," the voice of Dabbler, the resident doctor, spoke. "They were killed by some human, it's THEIR problem."
"But what if they WEREN'T killed by humans?" the voice of Papa smurf replied, his voice hushed. "Those cuts were far too small to be made by a human's blade."
Slouchy looked over at Nat, confusion in his face.
"Is he saying a SMURF did this...?" Nat asked in a choked whisper, his eyes wide. "Why...?"
"I dunno either," Slouchy replied, his voice also a whisper.
"Papa smurf," Dabbler's voice was quiet and disbelieving, "Surely, you can't mean that one of US did this?"
"I never said a smurf did this, Dabbler," Papa smurf replied, "simply a creature around our size. An elf, or an imp, or fairy. If it WAS one of us magical creatures, Gargamel and Azrael's deaths ARE our problem. Even with all the trouble they've put us through, murder is murder." Papa smurf paused a moment, "I have doubts it was a smurf. But we shall leave no stone unsmurfed if Gargamel's death was in fact caused by one of our own."
"I think I'm going to be sick," Nat mumbled, sinking to his knees. "What if a Smurf really DID kill them, Slouchy...? What happens then?"
"I dunno," Slouchy said honestly, "Bu' I think- Ah!"
Right at that moment, the smurflings were discovered. Their own Papa smurf loomed over them, a grave expression on his face. "Smurflings," his voice was low, "How much did you hear?"
"W-we heard about how you were saying it might be someone small," Nat said softly, deciding the truth was best. "A-about how it might be an imp, or a pixie, or a fairy, or..." He trailed off, his voice dying in his throat.
Papa smurf winced, already knowing what Nat was about to say. He knelt down to their level, eyes very serious. "Nat, Slouchy..." Papa smurf spoke, "I want you both to forget everything you heard just now."
Slouchy looked surprised. "But Papa smurf-!"
"Slouchy, this is of no concern to you two." the leader smurf's voice rose slightly, "Even if it is one of us, it is not your concern to know the fine details involved with this. Promise me you'll forget this at once."
Slouchy looked down at the ground. "We promise..." he mumbled, though the glint in his eye told a different tale.
"Good." Papa smurf patted them both on the shoulders. "Now go back to the village, I'm sure poor Sassy must be a wreck right now."
"Yes, Papa smurf..." Slouchy muttered, shuffling down the forest path.
Once they had left earshot of Papa smurf and Dabbler, Slouchy looked to Nat. "There's somethin' weird about this..."
"Yeah," Nat agreed. "But we can't go snooping around; we already told Papa we'd drop it. If he catches us poking around we could get into trouble." He paused. "It's probably best to let the adults handle this."
Slouchy made his face a pout. "I don' WANT to let this go, though. There's something I really don' like about this, and I WANT to know." he snapped his fingers. "I got it! You n' me, we could be like Smurflock Holmes and figure it out without Papa knowing! We've solved plenty'a mysteries before, right?"
"Well... Okay," Nat agreed at last. "But we have to be careful about it! Agreed?"
"Got it." Slouchy agreed, then looked up in thought. "Hmm, I guess first we have to take another look at the bodies when they're done... look for something they maybe missed...
Nat nodded his head in assent, too worried about having Papa realize they hadn't left to voice his agreement.
Chi: Yay! Now that that's over, let us take a minute to just remind y'all that this is what you signed up for~ SmurfyFriend/dragonmastrcrashrokz length, and YinYangOfThePeaceCircle/Riverthunder dark additions! :D
Aiko: You can't blame it ALL on me and River, you and Dragon did most of the describing!
Chi: Okay, so I'm a writer that loves dark stuff. Sue me.
Aiko: ANYWAYS…
Chi: We worked really hard on this, and we all hope it shows!
Aiko: Review! Seriously, reviews are our friends!
Chi: They make chapters come faster! :D Until the next time!