Title: A Good Book
Author: Kita_the_spaz
Beta by the awesome Micah_n10
Rating: Soft R for language and innuendo
Worksafe, though I don't recommend reading it there if you are prone to giggles.
Disclaimer: Still not mine, but if it was don't you think KakaIru would be canon by now?
Oh, and in case I forgot to mention it...? CRACK!
Notes: Written for Pixie_rings' birthday on the prompts: Whipped cream, general rudeness and a first edition of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban which Iruka is reading...
"Iruka." The tone was rapidly building up to a sulky whine; grating in spite of a concentrated effort to ignore it. "Iruka…"
Iruka managed not to let his irritation show and calmly turned another page.
"Ruuuukaaaaa…" It was a definite whine now.
Iruka gritted his teeth. He was not going to play this game.
He flipped another page.
"Ruka-ruuuu…?"
Not. Going. To. Play.
"Ruka-kun?"
No. Not doing –
"Ru-chaaaaan…?"
The crack of the book closing made the other occupant of the room jump, instinctively reaching for the weapons he wasn't wearing at the moment.
Iruka set the book aside gently, in spite of his brutality in shutting it. He gently trailed his fingers across the embossed leather cover before turning to face the silver-haired jounin sprawled in what was supposed to be an inviting posture across his sofa. Iruka was too irritated to think of it that way. He crossed the space between them in three quick steps.
Fisting his fingers in the front of Kakashi's faded gray shirt, he yanked the lithe jounin up until they were face to face. "Do not call me diminutive nicknames, you bastard. This is still my apartment and I'm still within my rights to throw you out on your skinny jounin ass." He looked meaningfully at the thunderstorm still raging outside, the one that had kept them both penned up in the small apartment. Iruka had seen it as an opportunity to catch up on his reading. He'd been looking forward to getting to read his lovely first-edition book since his entire class had pooled together to buy it for his birthday. Which had been six months ago.
Kakashi had quickly become bored. Even without Iruka's griping about his reading porn, he hadn't been able to concentrate on his Icha Icha. Iruka found out quickly that he was trapped in a very small apartment with a deadly ninja with the attention-span of a sugar-addled toddler on speed. After four rounds of 'Stop putting holes in my walls with whatever sharp objects you have on your person,' two brief interludes of 'Stay out of my kitchen before I set you on fire,' and three attempts to play with Iruka's on-again, off-again feline houseguest that had resulted in one very-abused looking copy-nin, a broken lamp and a jounin vest (and its current occupant at the time) being pinned to the wall by thirteen shuriken, two kunai and a letter opener.
After which, the vest had remained attached to the wall, the poor, traumatized cat had been left with the retired kunoichi downstairs, and Iruka had threatened the next time it wouldn't be his vest that would wind up pinned to the wall.
Kakashi broke his hold and slipped his arms around Iruka's waist. "I'm bored. I know of something we can do that's more interesting than your book." He nuzzled his nose into the sensitive skin where neck met shoulder and Iruka shivered involuntarily.
Growling under his breath, Iruka shoved the jounin away. "Stop that! Is sex all you think about?"
Kakashi slipped past his warding arms, and came up behind him. "Not all. Just mostly."
Iruka humphed and deftly removed himself from Kakashi's arms before the wandering hands reached their destination. "Not now. I'm reading now, and you can wait until tonight."
"But, Ru – "
"Finish that and I'll kick your ass again."
Kakashi pouted and slumped down on the couch again. Smiling, Iruka sat, tucking his feet under him and resumed reading. Ten minutes later, Kakashi heaved a sigh and rose to his feet. "Want some tea?"
Iruka nodded without looking up from his novel. The story was getting very engrossing now. Poor kid.
He heard Kakashi moving around in the kitchen and kept an ear cocked for the sure signs that his lover was up to something besides making tea, but he only heard the water running and the soft sound of someone humming to himself. Good. Maybe Kakashi would settle down now.
Absorbed in the book, he heard the sounds of Kakashi returning. He raised a hand for his cup, not looking up from the page.
"Iruka?"
Iruka looked up and gaped. There was no tea in sight, only a very naked copy-nin decorated in strategically placed dollops of whipped cream and holding a bowl filled with strawberries and more whipped cream.
Iruka pounced.
When he woke several hours later; sticky, sated and sore but with the satisfied feeling that his lover was even more tender in certain areas than he was, he looked up to find Kakashi reading his precious first-edition.
"You're right, Iruka, this is a good book."
And the bastard had the nerve to be further in the book than he'd been… before he'd been interrupted.