"Yo, Bobby bro, are you getting this on film?! I want this to to freaking viral, man!" Lemy had never been so confident, especially not around when his mother Luna, or aunt Lisa, helped him with his schoolwork. Or when he would talk Gwen without having some real bad breath. Of course, he had Lyle to cover him with gum if he wanted to go the extra mile. But this thing, this one silly thing that could end up in someone being hurt, was a risky shot at having some YouTub status, but Lemy aimed for general popularity on the internet.
The three of them, consisting of Lemy, Bobby Jr, and Lyle, had all met under the reason to be part of an idiotic stunt video. They were in the vacant parking lot of the Royal Woods Mall, in the after hours, underneath a coat of pitch black, along with a full moon shining brightly above. A shopping cart was involved, and Lemy was on the inside, ready to start. Lyle had his scrawny hands on the handles, ready to give Lemy the shove.
"You should, like, have gotten kneepads," Lyle suggested with concern. "Maybe a football helmet, too."
"I got kneecaps for that!" Lemy protested.
"And also, all that hair acts like a cushion!" Bobby Jr joked, laughing proudly. "You ladies hurry it up now! My mom's gonna give me the chancla if she comes into my room and finds me gone!"
"What is a chancellor? Speak the hell English, you... Taco!" Lemy snorted, and wheezed when Bobby Jr threw back the middle finger. "Do it, Lyle!"
"This is not a good idea-"
"I'll tell the whole world about your crush on that goth girl. What- What was her name? Mood? Brood? Doom? Dude?"
Lyle blushed underneath the orange streetlights, moving his head away, embarrassed. "You said you wouldn't, Lemy," he whispered. "C'mon man."
"Quit the blabbering and get it over with, Lyle!"
"F-fine, but if anything happens to you-" Lyle started moving the shopping cart at a slow rate, dramatically increasing the speed as he made a step onward. "It won't be my fault!"
The cart went zooming to where Bobby was standing by, filming and laughing hoarsely.
Lemy got the feel of being inside, and then stood up in a crouched position, setting his hands on the sides of the cart. "MY NAME IS LEMY LOUD, AND THIS IS JACKASS!" Lemy howled out in a Southern accent.
"Show us the goods!" Bobby demanded, still snickering away, now jogging to catch up with Lemy.
Lemy took his hands back to remove his blue leather jacket, revealing nothing underneath but a face of Lupa taking all the space on his chest. "HERE'S YOUR UNHOLY AND BROODING LUPAAAAAAA!" He wailed to the camera while flexing his muscles. "KISS MY ABIGAIIIIIILS!"
Bobby Jr lost breath, crying out so hard with laughter. "Abi- Abigails! Oh, my God!"
"Uhhh?" Lyle was not at all informed about this precisely in detail. This stunt thing felt more like a personal attack on Lupa instead. Or maybe a prank aimed directly against her. And Lupa was not exactly a forgiving girl with empathy. "You're gonna get on her bad side."
"She's always on a bad side," Bobby said into the camera, showing his face. "My name is BJ and I approve this anti-Lupa marketing campaign."
"I WILL-" Lemy lost balance after getting back down, tilting the cart with him to the side. "OH, SHIT!"
"Mierda!" Bobby caught Lemy falling hard out of the cart. "I got that, bro! Holy shit, I got that!"
Lemy had hit his elbow and leg, but he got up like nothing had happened. "Ah! I'm okay! I'm okay! No scrapes!"
"It's a miracle, yeet!" Bobby stopped the recording, setting the camera down. "We got it, bro!"
"Hell yeah, dude!" Lemy fist-bumped the Mexican boy, then cheered into the night skies. "Fucking yeah!"
Lyle wasn't too amused. He was one such person who'd never want to see his friends and family members not hurt themselves intentionally for the amusement, or fuckery. And this totally qualified. He wished he hadn't accepted their offer. "Is that it? You've got the video, right?"
"Oh yeah, we've scored it well," Lemy answered with content. "That's it, boys! We've got our footage!"
"Fuckin' A! I'll send it to you when I get home, Lembone." Bobby Jr began running out of the parking lot, praying he wouldn't get the chancla again this week.
"Sounds good, my dude! I'll see you at school!" Lemy yelped at the shrinking figure in red.
"We'd better get going," Lyle pointed out, already walking from the mall.
"Wait for me, faggot," Lemy insulted, speed walking to Lyle's side. He put back his leather jacket, nearly shivering from the cold. "So, uhhh, are you ever going to ask out Gloom?"
Lyle didn't want to talk about her. And especially not with Lemy, who was rough, rowdy, and sometimes rude. The type of person who would blackmail Lyle into embrassing himself in front of Gloom, or maybe even asking her out just to spite the sweet and kind Lyle. He didn't answer.
"I guess that's a yes," Lemy figured. "You do it good, and you fuck her. Have you noticed her big boobs? Like, unf, they're so juicy, and-" Lemy let out a sexual moan, closing his eyes. "Those goddamn titties!"
"Easy there, horny."
"But what's keeping you from asking? From what I've known of her, she's the same as you. I mean, she's quiet and nice. Who knows? Maybe she likes you, too, my dude! Don't be scared."
"I-I'm not scared!" Lyle sensed his masculinity was being targeted. "I'll... Talk to her-"
"More, Lyle! More than that!"
Lyle was just darn shy to talk to girls. Girls outside of their large family, to be precise. "I... Yeah."
"You yeah? You no! You yes!" Lemy was egging him on. "Yes, Lyle! You yes! Talk to her like a classmate. Ask to borrow a pencil! Be creative!"
Lyle was giving it some thought. "Creative..."
"Of course! Well, enough talk!" Lemy sprinted away, running far down into the streets. "We'll surely get our butts kicked!"
"Hey, slow down!" Lyle followed pursuit.
The Next Day
And of course, the video was uploaded by none other than Lemy. It was viral enough by his standards, and Leia had shot him a text, satisfied with delight that he did what she paid him to do; humiliate Lupa the way he did;
U did good Lem. Ur off the hook now. xo
Lemy was relieved. Leia had been dangling the doom card above his head for sometime now; he had been awfully rude to Lizy, the youngest cousin of his extended family. And Leia had caught him with a recording, threatening to post it online. He didn't care, until he realized that his own crush, Gwen, would frown upon his cruelty and reject him before he could even approach.
And he begged like a wuss to do something for her. This.
Well, now he would have to answer to Lupa for this shenanigan, which was only a bit concerning.
"Hey, Lemy," Gwen had approached him during lunch break, sitting beside him with her own packed lunch. "So, uhh..."
Lemy couldn't keep it in his pants. He felt sweaty, motionless.
"I've seen that video. That was..."
"Lame, wasn't it?" He figured she was here to poke fun at him, laugh at him. Gwen was one of the popular girls, and Lemy was low to be noticed by those particular girls yet. "Yeah, I fell, and-"
"Oh, no, I don't think it was lame. It was funny, and you just- You might've pissed Lupa off that way. I've met her a few times while hanging with Leia, you know? I know how she can be."
"R-right," Lemy agreed.
"I thought that, umm..." Gwen blushed, tapping her fingernails on the table. "I thought that y-you were cute-"
Her words made him go red. "Wh-What? Really?" He couldn't believe his ears. She called him cute. Cute! His insides filled with butterflies, flying all around.
"Um... Ehe..." Gwen didn't know where else to go. "I- I gotta go-" She took her lunch and left the table, leaving Lemy to have this great sensation for the rest of the day. Too bad it wasn't authentic.
"Well, that was excruciating," Gwen told Leia as she came back to join her. "I'm sure he bought it, he was stuttering."
"I know he did, Gwen. The boy just has a thing for you."
"Too bad it's not mutual," Gwen giggled. "Deal's a deal, so delete that video of me having my period in the fucking pool."
Leia liked having all the power in the world. It was fun while it lasted. "Deal's a deal, Gwen."
And she deleted all blackmail footage that afternoon.
AN: More senseless garbage from me. I don't know.