A/N: Parody of a song/poem off of Cats, "Macavity the Mystery Cat". I was bored this afternoon, and have a very strange mind, so I typed this up. I apologize in advance for any spelling or grammatical errors.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of this. The Phantom Blot and all other characters belongs to Disney, and Cats belongs to Andrew Lloyd Webber and T.S. Eliot. I am just a teenage girl who has a Cats CD, way too much time on her hands, and access to a computer.
The Phantom Blot's a mystery,
He's called the Hidden Claw.
For he's a master criminal,
Who can defy the law.
He's the bafflement of all police,
King Mickey's big despair,
For when they reach the scene of crime, the Phantom Blot's not there.
The Phantom Blot, the Phantom Blot!
There's no one like the Phantom Blot!
He's broken every single law, he comes up with such evil plots!
His powers of hypnotism would make a faker stare,
And when you reach the scene of crime, the Phantom Blot's not there.
You may seek him in a basement, you may look up in the air,
But I tell you once and once again, the Phantom Blot's not there!
Beneath the Phantom Blot's black cloak, he's very tall and thin.
You'd know him if you saw him, for his eyes are sunken in.
His brow is deeply lined in thought,
His head is highly domed.
His hair is greasy and unkempt;
His mustache is overgrown.
He sneaks behind you silently, with less noise than a snake,
And when everyone else is fast asleep, he's always wide awake!
The Phantom Blot, the Phantom Blot,
There's no one like the Phantom Blot!
For he's a cause of tragedy,
A monster of depravity!
You may see him in a by-street or try to stop him in the square,
But when a crime's discovered then the Phantom Blot's not there!
In disguise he acts respectable,
Then he goes and cheats at cards.
And his fingerprints are not found in any files, of any cop's.
And when the Hatter's looted,
Or the camera shop is rifled,
Or when color goes missing,
Or another detective's stifled,
Or Mickey Mouse turns felon,
Or Blaggard Castle is repaired,
There's the wonder of the thing, the Phantom Blot's not there!
The Phantom Blot, the Phantom Blot, there's no one like the Phantom Blot.
There never was a toon with such deceitfulness or strategy,
He always has a back-up plan, and one or two to spare,
No matter how hard you look for him, the Phantom Blot's not there!
And they saw that other toons whose wicked deeds are widely known,
(I might mention Mad Madam Mimm; I might mention the Beagle Boys),
Are nothing more than lackeys for the one who all the time just controls the operation,
The Napoleon of Crime!
The Phantom Blot, the Phantom Blot,
There's no one like the Phantom Blot!
He's a cause of tragedy,
A monster of depravity!
You may meet him in a by-street or try to stop him in the square,
But when a crime's discovered then the Phantom Blot,
The Phantom Blot,
The Phantom Blot!
The Phantom Blot!
When a crime's discovered then the Phantom Blot's not there!